Chapter 25 #2
She was just getting started, but before she could continue with her rant, Victoria walked into the kitchen and stuck a pod
into her Nespresso before setting a mug in place and pushing the start button.
She faced Shannon again and leaned against the counter.
“Continue.”
Shannon stared at her. “What did you say?”
“Continue. I’m listening. You’re on a tear. I need coffee, which I’m taking care of, so go ahead.”
Shannon tried to remember what she’d been saying. “You piss me off.”
“I know. I’m sorry about Javiar. He’s a good guy, just not for me.
I told him I didn’t do relationships, but he wouldn’t listen.
I did offer sex, by the way. Several times.
” Her tone turned wistful. “He wanted to wait. Oh, please. Wait? For what? I told him if it was the zombie apocalypse, then he could forget it because I would be too busy running away.” She shook her head. “This is better.”
“What? You being alone?”
“Yes. I don’t do well with people. I lack innate cheer.”
The Nespresso cycle finished. Victoria grabbed her coffee and walked to the table. Somehow Shannon found herself sitting across
from her. It seemed the mad was gone, leaving behind confusion and a little sadness.
“You do fine with people,” she told her. “You’re just emotionally stunted.”
“You’re indecisive and spineless,” Victoria countered.
“You’re a coward. That’s why you won’t go out with Javiar. You’re scared of what could happen.”
“I am. I’ve already had my heart broken. It’s not anything I want to go through again. If I don’t get involved, I won’t fall
in love. If I don’t fall in love, I’ll never have to feel like that again. It’s a win-win.”
“It’s a stupid plan. You’ll wind up old and alone.”
“As I believe love always ends badly for anyone who isn’t my parents and, you know, some other couples who are definitely
the exception, then ending up old and alone is inevitable, so my way means I get to skip all the yucky parts. When you think
about it, it’s actually a sensible plan.”
“But you’re lonely. You want someone in your life.”
“I have plants. I’m fine.”
“Now you’re lying.”
“I’m not. You’re the one who gave me the plants. They’re right there on the windowsill.” She pointed. “Are you having memory
issues? Did you hit your head?”
“I meant you’re not fine. You’re—” Shannon stared at the object sticking out of the trash bin next to the stove. “Did you
throw away your laptop?”
Victoria didn’t bother to look. “Technically, yes, but it’s more of a time-out. We’re currently not speaking. I’m letting it think about what it did so it can apologize and fix it.”
“Your laptop?”
“Uh-huh.”
“You need therapy.”
Victoria smiled. “Very possibly.” She reached for her coffee, then pointed. “You’re wearing your engagement ring! You finally
told your mom. Good for you. Was she thrilled?”
Shannon flinched. “No.”
“She wasn’t excited?”
“I didn’t tell her. Ava did. Then my mom confronted me for keeping it from her. She’s hurt and disappointed and all the things.
I made her cry, and I feel like crap, and now she’s gone away with Luis and I’m the shitty daughter who broke her heart.”
“My mother ratted you out? On purpose?”
“I don’t know. We haven’t spoken, and it’s not like I’m going to call her and ask.”
Victoria looked stunned. “I can’t believe she did that. Although Cindy is her friend, or she was. They had a connection.”
“Twenty-four years ago, which apparently still matters. The last time I spoke to your mom, she made it clear I was a failure
and a disappointment.”
“That sucks. She makes me feel that way all the time, but I’m used to it. I don’t remember if you said whether she used that
slightly outraged Surely you can’t mean that tone. The one that implies she’s practically faint with the shock of her disillusionment?”
Shannon shuddered at the memory of speaking with Ava. “Oh, yeah. I got that one. She pointed out that I was little more than
unformed clay. Not in those exact words.”
“Unformed clay with a killer engagement ring. I’m sorry my mother was a bitch.”
“She wasn’t,” Shannon admitted. “I’m complaining about her, but the truth is she’s not wrong about me.
I avoid making the hard decision. I wasn’t willing to tell my mom about the engagement and because of that I’ve hurt her.
For the rest of her life, she’s going to know that I kept my engagement a secret. ”
Victoria stared at her. “Jeez. Do you have to be so hard on yourself?”
“It’s the truth. I want to say it’s not, but she’s shattered, and I only have myself to blame.”
“I’m sorry. That’s really awful.”
“I’ll deal.” She looked at her friend. “Why’d you break up with Javiar? And no bullshit. Just tell me the truth.”
Victoria drew in a breath. “There was no breakup. He wanted to date, and I didn’t. It’s not about him, for what it’s worth.
I don’t want to be with anyone like that. I don’t want to care.”
Shannon studied her. “You’re lying. What you said before was the truth. You want to care, you just don’t want to get hurt.
Love isn’t pain.”
“Have you met my mother?”
“Love gives you wings.”
“Is that from a Taylor Swift song?”
Shannon sighed. “Fine, don’t be serious. Live your sad, little lonely life. One day you’re going to regret losing him or if
not him, then whoever it is who could have been someone important in your life.”
“Ouch.” Victoria picked up her coffee. “I told him from the beginning that I didn’t want to go out with him.”
“Then why did you keep hanging out with him?”
“I thought he’d put out.”
Despite her worry about her mom and her regret about what Javiar was going through, Shannon laughed. “You’re sick and twisted.”
“I know. Are we still friends?”
The question surprised her, but not as much as the hint of vulnerability in Victoria’s voice.
“Yeah, we are.”
After Shannon left to go to work, Victoria got out a pad of paper and tried to do her Morning Pages by hand.
Only she couldn’t think of anything to write.
Not even a couple of lines of I hate my mother got her mental juices flowing.
She needed her fingers on a keyboard to think, and unless she either forgave her current laptop
or bought a new one, she was stuck.
She showered and dressed, then wandered around her too-quiet condo. She felt restless and unsettled, as if she had too much
time and not enough to do.
She supposed she could head to the gym and do an upper-body workout. If she was going back to work, she was going to have
to get herself in shape. The walking cast would come off next week. Once it was gone, she would be allowed to resume relatively
normal activities, including walking short distances. Things like running, martial arts and any leg work at the gym would
be added gradually. If she pushed herself, she could be job-ready in three months. A thought that should have cheered her
but didn’t. Maybe because she didn’t want to go back to the stunt work. She wanted—
If Margarite really was pregnant, then the entire structure of her story was wrong, she thought, staring at her still-in-trouble
computer. Her plot points, the character arc, all of it. If Margarite was pregnant, Victoria was basically starting over.
What had been your average Boy Meets Girl, Girl Stupidly Falls for Boy, Boy Dumps Girl, and Girl Says Fuck You screenplay
was now something very different. It was about what? Giving up and getting pregnant and then life sucked. Right, because a
million people would stand in line to see that one.
She went into her office and grabbed her stack of index cards, then spread them out on the kitchen table.
Immediately she could see at least a dozen scenes she could cut.
If Margarite was really pregnant—and she wasn’t willing to admit she was okay with that yet—then her saying it to the audience was either the midpoint or the third turning point in the story.
Probably the midpoint because a whole lot had to happen after that.
“Does she fall in love with the baby?” she asked out loud. “I’d hate for her to fall for someone else. That’s just so weak.
Stand on your own, bitch.”
Only, she could already hear her critique group’s voices in her head telling her that love stories worked for a reason and
that she shouldn’t let her personal emotional stuntedness contaminate an innocent character.
She grabbed her laptop from the trash and booted it.
“Don’t think this means you’re forgiven,” she muttered, tapping the table impatiently as the screen came to life. The second
it did, she opened her screenwriting program and began to type.
DANNY
Margarite, what’s wrong?
He sits down next to her on the curb.
MARGARITE
Nothing. I’m okay.
She tries to fake a smile and fails.
MARGARITE (CONT’D)
It’s nothing. Really. Go home.
OLDER WOMAN
She’s pregnant and the guy just ran off.
“Interfering old biddy,” Victoria grumbled. “Mind your own business.”
Danny looks startled.
DANNY
You’re pregnant. Didn’t you use birth control when you were boffing idiot Jake? By the way, you’re going to want to get tested
for STDs because the man’s willing to put it anywhere.
She stopped typing. “Seriously, brain? This is you being helpful?”
She set the laptop on a chair and sorted through the cards. Danny was one of the stunt guys Margarite had worked with on the
movie. He was little more than a walk-on, there to add authenticity. But what if he was more? What if he’d secretly fallen
in love with her but obviously couldn’t say anything because of her infatuation with Jake?
She flipped over a couple of cards and started making notes. What if he hung out with her, just being a friend? They dealt
with her pregnancy together, and while he was being Mr. Sweetie Pants, she fell for him and realized what real love was. It
wasn’t sex on the beach with a self-absorbed asshole. It was laughing together while playing with Legos and bringing her Thai
food when she had a broken leg. Or rather while she was pregnant, because Margarite didn’t have a broken leg and there was
no way Victoria was thinking about Javiar. Doing that was just plain dumb. She’d made her decision, and she was happy with
it. Joyful, in fact. Starting right now.