Chapter 7
Esther
Everything had felt a little hazy and unfocused that morning and I’d had a really hard time following along with what the men at the cabin had been talking about.
The situation still felt completely absurd—but facing the six men in front of me, their faces wreathed in suspicion, made things come into clear focus very quickly.
“They never even asked who it was,” I repeated, looking at Otto apologetically. I wasn’t sure why I felt bad that my family hadn’t cared who I’d slept with. I guess I didn’t want him to feel unimportant.
“Was there anyone who knew?” Grease asked.
I started to shake my head and then stopped, realization dawning.
“Becka,” Otto said gruffly, his hand growing heavier on my back.
“My cousin,” I clarified to the men. “She knew that I’d spent time with Otto.”
“She know you fucked him?” Dragon practically barked at me. I flinched.
“I told her he kissed me,” I mumbled, embarrassed.
“Kissin’ doesn’t make babies, honey,” Casper said dryly.
“She didn’t know I was pregnant,” I shot back, embarrassed. I might not know anything about guns and whatever else they were into—probably nothing good—but I did know where babies came from.
“And if someone told her you were pregnant?” Dragon asked.
I nodded. “It could only be Otto,” I said softly.
His hand moved upward, wrapping comfortingly around the back of my neck. “I, uh, stopped by her family’s garden center a couple times,” he muttered uncomfortably. “A few days after Esther and I hooked up and then again, uh, yesterday morning.”
“You did?” my gaze shot to his. He’d come looking for me even after I’d stood him up. Something inside me warmed.
“Fuck,” his grandpa muttered.
“You know they wired that cabin with explosives?” Dragon asked, pulling my attention back to the angry men.
“That’s what one of the guys said—”
“Brody,” Otto chimed in.
“But my dad wouldn’t do that,” I continued. “Not with me living there. He’d never put me in danger. I’m his daughter.”
I just couldn’t comprehend it. Sure, for a split second when he’d brought me to the cabin, I’d imagined him killing me, but I hadn’t actually believed he’d do it.
If he was going to kill me, he would’ve done it the night before when he’d lost his temper and beat the crap out of me, not in the cold light of day.
My dad was surly and it wasn’t like we’d ever been close, but I’d never believe that he’d put a bomb in my house.
He had a temper but he loved his family even if he wasn’t good at showing it.
“If you let me call him, I think we can get things straightened out,” I told the men firmly. “Maybe he didn’t even know about your guns.”
“Your dad owns the cabin,” Casper said flatly.
“Really?” I replied. I’d figured it belonged to someone else in the church—someone who would be involved with stealing guns. There were a few men that I’d always thought seemed kind of shifty. A couple that had looked at me in a way that made my skin crawl.
“Still,” I said stubbornly. “There could be other people who knew about it. I doubt it was a secret.”
“Ones that knew you’d be out of there yesterday?” the guy named Mack asked. He was wearing a T-shirt and one of his forearms was covered from wrist to elbow in a thick white bandage.
“The doctor I saw yesterday is part of our church,” I said, desperately finding a thread that would pull my version of events along. “He would’ve known I had an appointment and wouldn’t be home.”
“That’s reachin’ a bit,” Otto’s grandpa said dubiously, pulling his phone out of the chest pocket of his T-shirt. “Give me a minute,” he mumbled to the group, standing and walking away to take the call.
“I really have to use the bathroom,” I said quietly to Otto, knotting my hands together in my lap and regretting the soda I’d drank with breakfast.
“Come on,” he said, getting to his feet. No one stopped him as he led me through an archway and into a hallway that stretched along the back wall of the building.
“Thanks,” I said, sliding past him as he swung open the door to a small bathroom.
I did my business quickly, hoping that he wasn’t standing right outside the door listening to me pee.
Looking in the mirror as I washed my hands, I tried to see myself as the men outside did.
My hair was still clean from the shower I’d had the day before, but it was messy.
I hadn’t bothered brushing it when I’d woken up that morning and hadn’t thought to do it since.
Using my wet hands, I smoothed the little wispy hairs away from my face and fixed my ponytail, wrapping the hair around and around and tucking the end into the elastic so that it resembled the bun I usually wore in public.
I couldn’t do anything about the dress I was wearing. It was warm inside the building and I would’ve liked to take my coat off, but there was a large stain running all along the front of it. Washing clothes by hand with dish soap left a lot to be desired in the stain-fighting department.
“Esther?” Otto called as I zipped my coat back up. “You okay?”
“I’m fine,” I called back, reaching for the door. I opened it to find him just inches away.
“You were quiet.”
“I was fixing my hair,” I replied, moving past him.
I really didn’t want to go back to be interrogated again, but standing with him in the dim hallway brought up all sorts of memories that I was trying to ignore.
He smelled the same. Spicy, almost, with something that was just specifically Otto.
It would be way too easy to lean in, just for a moment, and rest against him.
He followed me back toward the main room and as we walked back through the archway I felt a little tug on my hair and my bun unraveled, falling down my back.
I looked back at him and he smiled unapologetically, shrugging. Butterflies took flight in my belly until I forced them into submission. I wasn’t there to ogle Otto Hawthorne.
“Come sit,” Dragon ordered when he saw us.
My heart, not nearly as calm as I’d like to pretend, started thumping hard at the look on his face. He’d been expressionless before, a blank slate, but he wasn’t hiding anything anymore. In fact, all the men around the table were visibly angry.
“Got the explosives at the cabin taken care of,” Dragon began, his eyes on me. “Looks like only half of the crates were there.”
“Half are still missing?” Otto asked in disbelief.
Dragon nodded but was still looking at me. “You said your dad gave you that phone for emergencies?”
I was afraid to answer, and I cleared my throat to procrastinate, even for a second. “Yeah. When he dropped me off.”
“The one in the cabin, yeah?”
“I left it on the kitchen table,” I confirmed, nodding.
Otto’s grandpa scrubbed a hand over his face and the man named Leo cursed under his breath.
“What?” I asked, looking around. While they’d all been watching me intently before, now only Dragon would meet my eyes.
“There weren’t any trip wires,” he said quietly. “They were rigged to go off when someone tried to use that phone.”
“What?” I asked in confusion as Otto jerked to his feet beside me, the chair he’d been sitting on crashing to the floor.
“Those explosives in your cabin,” Dragon explained, his stare almost sympathetic. “They weren’t connected to any trip wires, that was all for show. The minute you tried to call out on that phone, they would’ve detonated.”
I could hear the words coming out of his mouth and I understood them logically, but I was still having trouble following what he was trying to tell me.
I was a quiet girl from a normal family.
I didn’t go out, I didn’t drink or do drugs, I’d never been in trouble, I’d never even driven higher than the speed limit.
All the talk of explosives and trip wires and shipments of rifles was so completely out of my experience that I’d kind of just gone along with it, not really letting any of it sink in because it didn’t make any sense to me.
I figured they’d get everything worked out and there would be an explanation for the last twenty-four hours and I’d be able to go back to my little cabin until my parents came for me.
I did understand emotion, though. I could read expressions and body language.
I knew when people were suspicious or curious or angry.
My grasp on interpersonal communication was just fine, and all of a sudden the fact that Dragon, clearly the leader of the group, was looking at me like he felt sorry for me made everything come into sharp focus.
They were either very good actors or everything I’d thought I knew about my life was a lie.
“I’m not sure what you’re trying to do,” I said softly, clenching my hands together in my lap. “But, I think I’m done talking now.”
“Esther,” Otto chided.
“Leave it,” Dragon ordered him, still watching me. “Let’s give her a minute.”
The men got up from their seats and left us, moving across the room to the bar. Their conversation was hushed, like a low hum, and I couldn’t make out the words.
“You okay?” Otto asked, his hand leaving my back so he could brush my cheek with his thumb. “It’s a lot to take in, yeah? You look a little out of it.”
“Why are you doing this?” I asked, my eyes on the scarred wood tabletop.
“Doin’ what, sugar?”
“This.” I gestured at the room. “All of this. What the heck is going on? Why—why would you say that my dad was trying to kill me? How does that help you? I don’t understand.”
I turned my head just in time to see Otto’s mouth drop open in surprise.
“I would’ve told you about the baby,” I continued. “Eventually. And I’m sorry that people stole from you but why are you dragging my family into it? I’ve already told you everything I know.”
“You think we’re lyin’ to you?”
“You said that the phone my dad left for emergencies was actually the detonator to a bomb under the floorboard of my cabin,” I replied tonelessly. “In what reality do you think that would actually happen?”