Chapter 21
Ani
Raffi took Ani to a restaurant attached to one of St. Helena’s boutique hotels that happened to be open at this odd, three p.m. hour. It was a lovely, and frankly romantic, spot. Outdoor seating surrounded by thick green vines, a fountain gently dripping, shade and sun playing across their faces.
When Ani saw that they were being directed to a U-shaped booth and they’d get to sit near each other instead of across the table, her breath hitched. She’d be so close to him. Maybe their arms, their elbows, would touch.
Once seated, Ani ran her fingers along the cool pressed-cotton menu. “Hey, I wanted to thank you. For earlier.”
Raffi appeared confused. “For—?”
“For not blaming me, with Kami, when she was whining about the white stones.”
Ani put a hand over her mouth, realizing the judgy verb she’d used. “I didn’t mean to say ‘whining’; that’s not fair.”
Raffi laughed kindly. “Ah-ha. So you see it now, right? She was whining. I’d even use ‘tantrumming,’ and it might still be accurate.”
“Weddings cause a lot of stress…”
“Don’t tell me that’s the first time you’ve seen a Kami tantrum.”
Ani paused, remembering. “Well, there was this time at LAX when she thought they lost her bags but they were actually at a different carousel.”
“Five or six years ago at a family friend’s gathering, Kami broke down and sobbed in front of everyone because her great-aunt put her homemade kuftes on her vegan boyfriend’s plate.
This lady was ancient, like ninety, and did not understand the concept of not eating meat.
But Kami made this statement about how disrespectful her family was to outsiders and ran off crying. ”
Ani nodded. She didn’t really want to put down Kami, but at the same time, this was sort of therapeutic.
Kami had dumped her, disappeared off the face of the earth, then snapped her fingers and expected Ani to plan her wedding for her two years later.
Granted, Ani had willingly agreed to do it—she had to—but what kind of person would have the audacity to ask that of her?
And who would know better, the little things that grated on her, than one of her other exes? “Sounds about right.”
They both stared at each other for a second. That was that. A good mini-trash-talking sesh about Kami.
Then Raffi said, with the hint of a smirk, “Don’t miss those sneezes, either.”
Ani slapped the table and laughed. “Oh my God, the sneezes! Does she think she’s a tiny woodland bunny in a Disney fairy tale?”
“Ah-chi! Ah-chi!” Raffi mimicked Kami’s high-pitched sneezes.
A man at a table in front of them turned around in disgust, which only ignited their laughter. She honestly hadn’t thought anyone else had noticed—no one had ever said anything—but Kami’s sneezes were so comically fake and cutesy, they always secretly annoyed her.
Between fits of laughter Ani said, “There’s no way that’s her real sneeze, right?”
Raffi wiped his eyes. “That is one hundred percent an affect.”
“I hope when she’s alone she sneezes like a bear. Like an Armenian dad at six a.m. on a Sunday, waking up the entire neighborhood.”
“Your dad does that, too? I think my dad wakes up the entire county of Napa with his.”
Ani tilted her glass in his direction. She knew the issue of his dad was sensitive, but Raffi had just offered up this humorous tidbit, so she kept it going. Besides, they had talked enough about their ex. “They need a sneeze-off.”
Raffi smiled warmly at her. “We’ll have to make it happen.”
Ani returned it, then buried the smile in her glass.
They both drank wine from a nearby winery Raffi said was owned by decent people, and Ani felt the drink go to her head far too quickly, having only had that egg at breakfast and a slice of bread from the table.
Raffi didn’t seem to be tipsy like her, but he was studying her closely. She turned away from his gaze, reddening and remembering their kiss for the thousandth time. The press of his body, how protected and adored she felt. How he had shielded her from Kami’s wrath without a second thought.
A heavy silence fell over the table. To break it, she said, “So, what’re you doing in the city?” at the same time Raffi started talking, but she couldn’t hear what he said.
“Sorry.” She shook herself. “You were saying?”
“I don’t have anything to do in the city tonight.”
“You don’t?”
“I don’t.”
She didn’t quite understand why he had said otherwise earlier. He seemed so serious. Had he meant…“So you’re not going to drive me home?”
Raffi laughed. “That’s your conclusion? No, Ani baby, of course I’m going to drive you.”
A delicious warmth spread through her at the term of endearment.
She could hardly speak, but managed, “Then—?”
He spoke quietly, deliberately. “I mean, I wanted to spend more time with you. I don’t mind driving you back home, because that’s an extra hour plus we get to spend together.”
Her mouth made a little circle. “Oh…”
Then he reached out and clasped her hand on the table. Strong and warm.
He looked at her meaningfully, and she held her breath, not entirely sure, but hoping, hoping.
“I have to say something. Would you let me say something?”
Her heart pounded. She wanted to hear it. Whatever it was. “Yes,” she said, zeroing in on him entirely.
He looked down, then up at her, shifting in his seat.
“I’m going to start talking and—” He cut himself off, then restarted.
“Ani, I can’t keep pretending I’m not completely wild about you.
The last few months have been hellish without you in it.
I realized you’re starting to mean a lot to me, and I don’t want to keep that fact to myself anymore.
I always thought— Well, instead of scaring the shit out of me, I’m thrilled by it, by the prospect of you, anything that has to do with you. Everything about you.”
He couldn’t possibly mean this, could he?
This wasn’t normal flirting; this was a serious declaration of like.
This man, who she was starting to adore, was telling her these beautiful words, and she wanted to let herself feel it all the way.
She was almost there, every last hesitation almost dissolved.
He continued, his eyes intense, dark, and searing.
“And to make it crystal clear, I’m not just talking about the physical, but believe me, I want to do things that…well. Let’s just say things that are incredibly amot.”
Ani felt the heat between her legs instantaneously. He thought about her body and wanted to…do things to it. She wanted that, too. Very, very much.
Raffi continued, “But not just that. I want to be with you. To see where this goes. For the first time in a long time, I feel something. For you. Brilliant, funny, fearless you. I want to try being together. Date you, spoil you, be there for you in every aspect of your life the way you deserve.”
Ani’s mouth dropped open. She had to force herself to close it.
Raffi Garabedian just asked her to be his girlfriend.
He’d addressed it, too, that she feared he only wanted to sleep with her.
That he didn’t have intentions beyond the physical.
“Date you, spoil you.” Oh my God, that was such a turn-on.
The closed gates around her heart swung open.
The most gorgeous guy she’d ever seen in her life turned out to be a total sweetheart who was interested in her.
Very interested in her. The girl who got rejected by Adrian Lamont and publicly humiliated.
The older sister who all the aunties looked at with pity at Talar’s wedding.
The woman who thought she’d never fall for someone ever again.
She’d fallen for him. Northern California’s most eligible Armenian bachelor.
And he felt the same way. It wasn’t blood rushing through her veins but liquid ecstasy, metallic and sparkling and filling her body with the warmest glow.
“Is that a good jaw drop or a bad one?” he asked nervously.
She put their combined hands in her lap, scooted closer to him, and stared at him in adoration. She wanted him to know how happy he had just made her. “A deliriously good one.”
“Yeah?” he said, the relief obvious.
“Yes. Yes.” She couldn’t stop smiling.
A beat passed when they basked in each other’s adoration.
“I do have one, uh, stipulation, though,” he said.
Well, now she could stop smiling. The worry rose in Ani again, and she straightened in her seat. “What’s that?”
“If you’re not—if you don’t really feel it, or don’t think we could have anything together…if you’re still pining for someone—”
“I’m not.”
“—just say it. Just tell me no. If you don’t think this has potential, you and me—if your gut feeling is saying no, then please, you have to tell me now. I can’t…”
He trailed off, like he was getting choked up. He was the one who was worried. He was afraid of something; of what, exactly, wasn’t clear yet. She stayed quiet to let him speak.
He stared down at the table, straightened a fork. “I can’t go into this with all this hope just to have you leave me. I’m not sure I could take being left by the one person I’ve started to care about.”
This whole time, she’d been bracing for the crash—so sure that if they ever actually got together, he’d eventually walk away. But here he was, sitting next to her in a booth, admitting that his biggest fear was her leaving him.
He had meant every word. No ego, no performance.
And it startled her, honestly. The depth of it. The vulnerability.
Ani picked up their still-clasped hands from her lap and kissed his. “Raffi jan, I can’t guarantee that down the line we won’t realize we’re not compatible and break up. You know that, right? Neither of us can.”
He stiffened, and she really felt for him. He’d been hurt so much. She’d never accounted for his fears before. But now that he’d shown Ani that side of himself, she could do her best to allay them. “I can tell you that right now I am one hundred percent enthusiastically in—”
Now he brought their joined hands to his mouth and laid several kisses on hers.