Chapter 47
CHAPTER 47
DIXIE
T he steady hum of conversation wrapped around me like a blanket. These people were good. My mother’s harsh judgment was really uncalled for. I knew for a fact she had never actually sat down with any of them. She was judging them based on rumors and tabloids. To be frank, their family seemed a lot more functional than mine. Everyone here was different but they weren’t ostracizing anyone. I had learned a little more about the “illegitimate” children. They were always welcome to join family gatherings. If the Bancroft clan was as bad as people said, they would never open their hearts and doors.
The second course arrived, a delicate soup served in shallow bowls that glistened under the chandelier light. Steam curled up in delicate wisps, carrying the aroma of herbs and something earthy, comforting. I dipped my spoon in, my gaze flickering briefly to Isaac across the table. He was watching me again. I wondered what Hayes told him. It felt like he was trying to read my mind.
I took another bite of the soup. It was rich, velvety, and perfectly seasoned. I couldn’t help the soft hum of appreciation that escaped my lips.
“Good?” Hayes asked, his voice low, just for me.
“Incredible,” I admitted, glancing at him. “Taste it.”
He obliged, taking a spoonful from his own bowl. His eyes met mine as he swallowed. He nodded, using his napkin to dab at the corner of his mouth. “It is good.”
I felt a strange warmth spread through me as Hayes smiled. God, I missed him.
The conversation at the table ebbed and flowed, with Diana and Isaac exchanging playful banter about the upcoming wedding. Hayes chimed in occasionally, his dry humor earning a few laughs. I found myself relaxing more, even laughing along with them. It wasn’t so different from the dinners we’d shared in the Maldives, where the world felt far away.
But then I caught myself. I couldn’t let myself forget tonight wasn’t really what it looked like. We still had to talk. I was still keeping a secret from him. He certainly hadn’t forgotten. I didn’t either. These were nothing more than fleeting illusions that we could go back to how things were. We couldn’t. And that was what terrified me. I didn’t know if we would ever get to go back to normal.
The next course was delivered to the table. A perfectly seared filet of beef, its edges caramelized to a deep, rich brown, sitting on top of creamy mashed potatoes flecked with herbs. Roasted vegetables surrounded it. The presentation was stunning, the kind of dish that made you pause before taking the first bite.
This was probably one of the best things about hanging around with the wealthy—the way they ate. The food was always like a show on its own. I loved a good old-fashioned meatloaf, but damn, this looked too good to eat.
I glanced at Hayes, who was already cutting into his steak. He caught my eye and gave me a small, encouraging smile. “You’re going to love this,” he said confidently.
“I already am,” I said with a nervous laugh. “This is why they say you eat with your eyes first. I’m salivating just knowing how good it’s going to taste.”
“Dig in.” He grinned and popped a forkful of steak into his mouth.
I took my fork and knife, slicing into the tender meat. It practically melted under the blade. When I took the first bite, the flavors exploded in my mouth—savory, buttery, and just the right amount of seasoning. I couldn’t help but close my eyes for a moment, savoring it.
“Told you,” Hayes said, his voice tinged with amusement.
I opened my eyes to find him watching me. “You were right,” I admitted, feeling a faint blush creep into my cheeks.
Diana’s voice broke through the moment, drawing me back to reality. “What did you think of Dixie’s dress for the wedding, Hayes?”
“Stunning,” Hayes replied. “I loved it. Thanks for helping her pick out something that was absolutely perfect.”
“We had fun,” Diana said.
The conversation continued, but my mind wandered. I couldn’t shake the weight of what was coming. I was dreading the moment we’d have to talk. I spent most of the evening mingling with Hayes’s family. The Bancrofts were a larger-than-life bunch, and though their energy could be overwhelming, they had a way of making you feel included. I genuinely liked all of them.
I found myself laughing at stories about their kids and a recent dance recital. They were all so connected. It made me miss Frankie.
While I was surveying the dessert cart, Hannah smiled at me. “Your skin is glowing,” she said, tilting her head. “Whatever you’re doing, keep it up. You look radiant. Is it a specific product you’re using? I have a cosmetics company and I would love to know that’s mine.”
“Just a basic drugstore facial scrub,” I said.
Her words stuck with me. Radiant . It was a nice compliment, but it also reminded me of the growing anxiety simmering beneath the surface. I needed to see my doctor soon. Every little thing—a wave of nausea here, a burst of energy there—had me questioning what was happening with my body. I was trying not to obsess, but radiant skin had to be a good sign, right? People said pregnant women glowed. Was I glowing? I certainly didn’t notice it, but maybe others could tell.
That was disturbing. What if Hayes saw my radiant skin? I didn’t think I was suddenly a vampire sparkling under the sunlight, but what if he picked up on the clues? The last thing I wanted was for him to figure it out on his own.
Dammit. I was going to have to tell him soon. Really soon.
I chose a slice of cheesecake for Hayes and a tiramisu for myself. I carried the dishes back to Hayes, who was talking with his brother Hudson.
“Oh, that looks good,” Hudson said. “I’m going to see what I can find.”
“I got you cheesecake,” I said. “But I’m thinking we can share.”
He grinned. “I like the sound of that.”
Hayes took the plate from me, his fingers brushing against mine for the briefest moment, sending a jolt of electricity up my arm. I sat down beside him, trying to ignore the way my heart was pounding. He cut a small piece of the cheesecake with his fork and held it out to me. “Here,” he said, his voice soft.
I hesitated, then leaned forward, letting him feed me the bite. It was rich and creamy, the perfect balance of tangy and sweet. I closed my eyes for a second, savoring it. When I opened them again, Hayes was watching me intently, a flicker of something unreadable in his gaze.
“Good?” he asked.
“Amazing,” I replied, my voice barely above a whisper.
He nodded, taking a bite for himself. We were faking it well. But we both knew there were things we weren’t saying. But for now, we were just going along with it.
When the night began to wind down, Hayes came to my side. “Ready to head out?” he asked.
“Yeah,” I said, suddenly tired.
That was something I was chalking up to the pregnancy. I did feel like I was tired more often. I let him take my hand as we said our goodbyes. The driver opened the door, and we slid into the car together.
The ride home started off quiet, but then Hayes broke the silence with a chuckle. “Did you see Isaac try to flirt with that waitress tonight?”
I laughed, immediately picturing the scene. “How could I miss it? He asked her if she believed in love at first sight, didn’t he?”
“Yes! And she just stared at him like he’d lost his mind,” Hayes said with a laugh. “His lines never get old.”
“Poor guy,” I said, though I was laughing too hard to sound convincing. “He really thought that would work?”
“I told him to just be himself,” Hayes said, shaking his head. “Maybe that was a mistake.”
Sitting so close to him, I couldn’t resist him any longer. I leaned in and kissed him. Not a hesitant or gentle kiss, but a desperate, all-in kind of kiss. I poured everything I had into it—all the longing, all the fear, all the love I couldn’t put into words.
He kissed me back just as fervently, his hands framing my face like I was something precious. For a moment, I forgot all the drama between us.
When we finally broke apart, I was breathless. “I needed tonight,” I admitted softly. “I needed to feel connected to you again.”
He nodded. “I did too.”
The car pulled to a stop in front of my building.
I wanted to invite him in—I needed to. We had to talk. But I was just so damn scared of his reaction. He walked me inside the lobby. “Would you like to come in?” I asked softly.
“I’d better not,” he said. “Despite how much I want to, I can’t go that far with you when I know you’re holding something back. Unless you’re ready to talk.”
I swallowed hard, nodding. “That’s fair. Another time. I’m not ready. Almost.”
He hesitated for a moment, like he might change his mind, but then he kissed my forehead and turned to leave.
I was so torn. I turned and stepped into the elevator. I was still replaying that kiss in my mind. The way his lips felt, the way his hands had steadied me, the way he’d made me feel like I wasn’t alone. Would he still feel like that when he found out?
I stepped out of the elevator and stopped when I saw who was at my door. My mother was standing there, her arms crossed and an expression on her face that could make a grown woman feel like a scolded teenager. Beside her stood my eccentric neighbor, Margaret, who was grinning ear to ear.
“Finally,” Margaret said, clapping her hands together. “I’ve been waiting forever for you to get home. I knew you were up the duff!”
I narrowed my eyes at her in confusion. “What?”
Margaret winked. “I’d let a tall drink of water like Hayes knock me up too.”
I wanted to crawl into a hole and disappear. “Margaret, that is not cool.”
She just shrugged, unbothered. “But it’s true. We’re all women here. He almost woke up my ovaries.”
With a laugh, she disappeared into her apartment and left me standing alone with my mother. I thought about following Margaret in an attempt to escape.
My mother didn’t look amused. “We have to talk,” she said, her tone sharp.
I cringed, fumbling with my keys. “Mom, can we not do this in the hallway? I know Margaret is still listening. Aren’t you, Margaret?”
“No,” the woman said from the other side of the door. “I’m giving you privacy.”
I unlocked my apartment and my mind raced. How did Mom know? Had Frankie told her? Was I walking into an ambush?
The moment the door closed behind us, she turned to me, her arms still crossed. “Well?”
“Well, what?” I asked.
“Don’t play dumb, Dixie,” she snapped.
“Who says I’m playing?”
Mom didn’t find it funny. “How long were you planning on keeping this from me?”
I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
She raised an eyebrow. “Don’t insult my intelligence.”
“Mom—”
“Is it true?”
She was looking at me like I was fourteen and pregnant. I didn’t live at home. I was a grown woman. This whole interrogation felt a little much.
I sighed. “I was going to tell you. I just needed time.”
“Time for what?” she demanded.
“To figure things out,” I said, my voice cracking. “To figure out how to tell Hayes. To figure out how to deal with this without everything falling apart.”
“Your boyfriend doesn’t know?”
“Not yet,” I said.
Mom’s eyes widened. “The longer you wait, the harder it’s going to get.”
“I know,” I whispered.
She shook her head. “I didn’t think you were dumb enough to get yourself into this kind of a situation.”
“Mom, stop calling me dumb. I’m tired and I’m too old to listen to a lecture.”
“Fine, but this is not over.”
“No shit, Mom. I estimate it won’t be over for the next seven months. Eighteen years. Forever.”
She scowled at me before stomping to the door and letting herself out.
Frankie . I couldn’t believe my sister told them anyway.
She had gone too far.