Our Mother’s Sons

8. Rainah

CHAPTER 8

RAINAH

I had just sat down with a glass of wine and pushed out a content sigh when my doorbell rang. Cutting my eyes into slits, I stared at the door because I wasn’t expecting company. The boys were in bed, and I had about an hour to myself before it would be bedtime. Mr. Bowman’s case was still stressing me out. I didn’t believe for a second that he was innocent, and I was still apprehensive about representing him. There were some attorneys at Waldorf and Associates that had big murder cases. There was a woman being represented who was suing an athlete for sexual assault. But there were also a few small cases. Money laundering, wrongful death lawsuits. I wished I’d been given one of those.

If I lost the case, Tony nor Mr. Bowman would be pleased, but if he got off, I’d be upset with myself. It was almost a lose lose situation. With a kiss of my teeth, I stood up irritated by the fact that someone took it upon themselves to pop up on me unannounced. Not many people had my address, so I was confused. When I looked out of the peephole, I was even more confused. The fuck was PJ doing at my door? I had never invited him over nor given him my address.

The confused glower remained on my face after I opened the door. It had been three days since I saw PJ at Jonah’s, and we hadn’t spoken since. “What are you doing here?” I looked up and down the hallway. It was quiet and empty. I lived in a secure building, so someone had to let him in, and no one was supposed to do that. It didn’t matter if someone was right behind you when you were walking in. You were supposed to let the door close in their face and let them put the code in themselves. That way no one that didn’t belong could slip into the building. Like PJ obviously had.

“We need to talk.”

“Okay, you have my phone number.” My head jerked back. “How do you even know where I live?”

Rather than answering the questions, PJ just stared at me, and I instantly became creeped out. Had he followed me? Or did he use other means to get my address? After all, he was a police officer and according to Jeovanni, he wasn’t the most upstanding officer out there. It weirded me out that he could have just typed my name into a computer system and gotten my information.

“This is ridiculous.” I took a step back and started to close the door when he stuck his foot inside the doorway and blocked it from closing.

“I’m not leaving until I talk to you.”

“You don’t get to make demands,” I replied in a harsh whisper. “According to you, you don’t owe me any explanations, and I’m fine with that. I have sons. Sons that you haven’t met, and they are home. You can’t just pop up on me and be welcomed inside my home with open arms. That’s not how I operate. Maybe if you had called or texted and asked for some of my time, I would have obliged you but this?” I jerked my head back. “You’re out of line.”

“I’m out of line?” he had the nerve to look confused. “All I’ve done was try to show you that I want to be in your life. You and your kids. I’ve been after you since before you moved to Charlotte. You gave a nigga like Jeovanni a chance but yo”

“Keep Jeovanni’s name out of your mouth,” I snapped cutting him off. “You don’t get to talk about what you don’t know about. You damn sure don’t get to act like you’re somehow better than him when you’re on his payroll.”

PJ’s jaw muscles flexed. My words angered him, and I could see him literally attempting to keep his cool. “I don’t know what you think you know about my dealings with Jeovanni, but I suggest you take your own advice and not speak on what you don’t know about.”

“Boy fuck you,” I snapped louder than I meant to. “You’re at my home uninvited. I didn’t come after you. Don’t get it mistaken. Whatever it is you have going on with Jeovanni, I don’t care. Not one bit. Now you have a nice night.”

I slammed the door, and he snatched his foot away just in time. I was pissed, but I was also uneasy. The fact that PJ got my address and got into my building so effortlessly made me a little uneasy. He was also borderline aggressive. If he did become a problem what could I do? Call the police? He was the police. I was sure half of the force were his friends, and they more than likely looked out for one another. As a single woman living alone, I did own a gun, but I prayed that I would never have to use it.

Ausnor Beach was stressing me the hell out. The only good things about being back were being near family and my sons finally knowing their father. I had never seen them happier. They woke up talking about Jeo and Jovani. They thought their dad and uncle were the coolest people ever. Jeovanni still didn’t have a lot to say to me, but that was to be expected. As long as Jason and Jordan were happy, I had to take whatever came with it.

I sat on the couch and took a huge swallow of wine. Then another and another until the glass was empty. The slight buzz I had was only enough to slightly ease my nerves. It also had me yawning, and I prayed sleep would find me easily. The stress from Mr. Bowman’s case, my strained relationship with Jeovanni, and the newfound information I had concerning PJ had been the cause of a few sleepless nights. All I wanted was a good eight hours of sleep, so I could at least face all the drama in my life with a clear and well rested mind.

I trekked into the kitchen to put my glass in the sink but ended up pouring more wine instead. After gulping it down fast enough to become slightly dizzy, I washed the glass and retreated to my bedroom. Snuggling underneath the covers, I closed my eyes, and it didn’t take sleep long to find me. However, I woke in what felt like minutes later, after a dream about Jeovanni snatched me from my peaceful slumber. In my dream, we lived in a huge house with an enormous backyard. He was cooking on the grill, and I was running around the yard with the boys. Everyone had the biggest smiles on their faces, and the moment was perfect. Until a S.W.A.T team ran into the backyard with weapons drawn and carted Jeovanni away. The boys were horrified, and all they could do was cry as we watched Jeovanni be led away from us in handcuffs.

I woke up with a heavy heart praying that would never be Jeovanni’s reality. Not only did I not want that for my sons, but I didn’t want that for him either.

* * *

The next day, I had been at work for two hours when Mr. Waldorf waltzed into my office. “Rainah, my apologies for not checking in with you more frequently. I’ve been swamped. How are you adjusting?”

The smile I gave Mr. Waldorf was forced and not genuine. “I’m adjusting wonderfully. Everyone is very helpful and welcoming.” That part was true. The only issue I had was the case he’d assigned me to.

“I’m glad to hear that. I love how everyone meshes well together. We all get along great, and we look out for one another. How is Brent’s case going?”

I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. “It’s going. I’ve gone over all of the evidence and interviewed him extensively. I feel I’ll be prepared when it’s time to go to court.” Swallowing down a lump, I hoped that I appeared confident.

I could challenge the witnesses. I could even call the victims liars. I had no for sure way of knowing if I’d win the case, but I could put my best foot forward. Or I could do a half ass job and probably be fired. The thought of standing in the court room making the victims look like liars made my stomach churn. The more I thought about it, there was no way I could do it. Mr. Bowman’s first court appearance was in three weeks, and I knew he would plead not guilty. We’d then be given a date for the start of the trial. I had been praying on it, but God didn’t have to walk into the room and physically tell me that refusing the case was the right thing to do. That was something that I already knew.

“That’s great. I have confidence in your skills, but the judge that will be in court on the day of his first appearance is a good friend of mine. He owes me a favor, and he’s going to make sure that he’s the judge that tries the case. We’ve got this one in the bag.” Mr. Waldorf winked at me, and I literally felt like I had to vomit.

Was everybody fuckin’ crooked? I couldn’t respond to him because I was speechless. “Keep up the good work,” he added before walking out of the office. I was truly thrown for a loop.

I was still in my office an hour after everyone else had left for the day. There were other businesses on other floors that had later hours than the firm, so there was a security guard on the premises until midnight. I was on the verge of tears wrestling with whether or not I should type up a resignation letter and give it to Mr. Waldorf. But even if I quit, he still had a judge in the bag, so Brent would more than likely get off anyway. If he was going to walk regardless, shouldn’t I at least get paid for the case before I walked away? I refused to help guilty people get off on a regular basis, but I was already there and had already put the work in.

I shut the computer down without typing the resignation letter. Before I could stand and collect my things, a figure walked through the open door. Lifting my head, I had assumed it was the security guard doing his rounds, but my mouth went dry when I observed that it was PJ. I did tell him that I worked for Waldorf and Associates, but I was a little tired of him popping up on me unannounced. He was in his uniform which probably explained why the security guard let him up without checking with me first. A blind man could see that PJ obviously liked to flex his power.

“Why are you here?” I tried to sound confident, but he was starting to really creep me out.

PJ closed the door, and my heart began to race. “I thought about our last conversation, and I think we can fix this.” PJ walked over and sat on the edge of my desk. “I really like you, and I know you like me too. We can get past this. I do some side work for the father of your children. It’s no big deal, and it puts money in my pocket. Police pay isn’t all that great. It was a small misunderstanding, but it’s nothing for us to end things over.”

Delusion at its finest. I was really beginning to wonder about PJ’s mental health. “PJ I have to leave and go get my sons. I really don’t have time for this.” I stood up and attempted to round the desk.

He eased off the desk and stood directly in front of me. Regardless of him being in uniform, I smelled alcohol on his breath. He definitely wasn’t the man I thought he was. He stepped closer to me invading my personal space, and a lump formed in my throat. It was extremely hard to hide my anxiousness. I didn’t want him to know that I was afraid.

“PJ, I have to go.” I attempted to keep my tone even, but he only inched closer. At that point the stench of alcohol was suffocating me.

“Nah. I’ve spent a good amount of time trying to get close to your stuck up ass and prove that I was worthy. Yeah, you’re a lawyer and maybe you think that makes you some kind of hot shot, but you come with two kids. Let’s not act like you’re the best that I can do.”

The fear subsided just a bit, and I became pissed. “So, go do better. At this point, it’s like you’re stalking me,” my lips turned downward.

PJ stared at me for a moment while my heart drummed in my chest. In one swift motion, his hand was around my neck. His grip was so tight, that I couldn’t scream. Using his free hand, PJ pushed my skirt up, and I began to panic. My eyes widened, and I attempted to knee him in the groin. PJ slammed me on the desk hard enough to knock the wind out of me. Tears spilled over my eyelids. I had never been violated in such a way. The fear of being raped was far more terrifying than the insane hold he had on my neck that was restricting my breathing.

Reaching underneath my skirt, PJ tugged at my panties. A loud knock on the door had to be God answering my prayers. PJ snatched his hands off my body as if he had touched something hot. I gasped for air as I struggled to sit up. Before I could get off the desk, Jeovanni and the twins walked in, and that made it even harder for me to get control of my breathing. My heart shattered as the twins’ faces crumpled with confusion. Jeovanni acted fast and ushered them back out the door, but I was sure they could tell something was wrong. With a shaky hand, I wiped the tears from my cheeks while PJ’s bitch ass had the nerve to panic. He looked as if he’d seen a ghost, and that was good enough for his ass.

I was in the process of rubbing my aching throat in an effort to soothe it when PJ looked at me with desperation in his eyes. He may have been an officer of the law, but he appeared nervous by the fact that Jeovanni caught us in the act of something that wasn’t right. When Jeovanni came back into the office without the boys, fire danced in his eyes.

“Fuck was going on in here?” he asked in a low tone while glaring at me.

“We were just”

“Shut the fuck up,” Jeovanni barked as he whipped his head in PJ’s direction.

Did I tell the truth? I could tell that Jeovanni was ready to beat PJ to a pulp, and I didn’t want that for him. Jason and Jordan adored their father. I didn’t want him getting into trouble for putting his hands on a police officer.

“He was just leaving,” I replied in a shaky tone.

PJ wasted no time rushing past Jeovanni and exiting the office. “That nigga put his hands on you?” he asked with his eyes narrowed into slits.

“He showed up at my condo a few days ago. I didn’t give him my address. Then he showed up here. I asked him to leave…” I shook my head as my voice trailed off. “He doesn’t seem to be mentally stable. He was drunk.” I sat down in my desk chair and closed my eyes. Why was all this messed up shit happening to me?

“I’ll take you and the boys home to get some of your things. I have a condo. I’m rarely ever there. Nobody knows it’s mine. You can stay there until I handle PJ.” My eyes flew open.

“Jeovanni, he’s a police officer. Just let it go. I don’t want you getting into trouble on my behalf. Please.”

“Fuck that nigga. He’s a dirty cop, and he touched the wrong one. Come on. I told the boys you were choking on a piece of candy, and the officer was helping you.” Jeovanni’s jaw muscles flexed. The fact that he was livid struck a little hope in me that he didn’t completely hate me. If he did, why would he want to protect me? Was it only because I had his sons?

“Mommy are you okay?” Jason was the first one to run to me when Jeovanni and I walked out of my office, but Jordan was right behind him.

“How did you choke on a piece of candy?”

“I’m fine,” I gave both of them a small smile. “I was talking with cady in my mouth, and it slipped down the wrong way. The police officer had to press in my stomach and make me throw it up.” I lied. “I was so scared, but it came out, and I’m all better. That’s why I told you boys not to run with candy in your mouths.”

Jeovanni was quiet as we stepped onto the elevator. He was trying to keep it cool, but he was pissed. I was so close to packing my things and hauling ass back to Charlotte. Ausnor Beach had made my life so complicated that it wasn’t even funny. I couldn’t take the boys away from their father, however. Jeovanni and the boys rode with me, and he called someone named Deuce to come pick his car up.

The car ride was awkward. In the backseat, Jason and Jordan talked a mile a minute. But Jeovanni and I didn’t say one word to each other. His cologne engulfed my senses making me momentarily forget about the assault from PJ. Jeovanni’s presence and his scent gave me a sense of nostalgia. I had missed him so much. At the moment, I wanted nothing more than to melt in his arms. Since finding out Jordan and Jason belonged to him, Jeovanni had looked at me with nothing but contempt. The rage he exhibited after finding out what PJ did was flattering. He didn’t completely hate me. The revelation almost made me erupt into tears, but I held it together.

By the time we reached my condo, I was exhausted. Jeovanni told the boys we were having a sleepover somewhere else, and they erupted into cheers. Jeovanni could probably tell them they had to go to Broccoli land and eat unlimited broccoli for two days, and they’d probably shout from the rooftops about how great broccoli was knowing they despised it.

I could barely think straight, but I managed to grab some bras, panties, a pair of pajamas, two dresses, sweats, some shirts, a pair of slacks, and a blouse. My personal hygiene items, hair products, and shoes were next. Jeovanni had helped the boys pack. I wasn’t sure how long we’d be gone, but it looked like he’d picked out about a week’s worth of clothes for them.

“Ready/’ he asked, and I nodded.

Jeovanni drove, and I rested my head on the seat and closed my eyes. My throat was burning, and I had a headache. It almost felt like PJ had crushed my windpipe. I had just dozed off when the car came to a stop. Opening my eyes, I saw that we were in a parking garage. Jeovanni grabbed all of our bags and we followed him to the resident entrance. The lobby alone made me aware that we were in some top-notch shit. My condo was nice, but Jeovanni’s building had upper echelon luxury vibes. I was sure the starting price for the condos was a few million.

On the elevator, Jeovanni pressed the button with twenty-six on it. There were thirty floors, so he was up pretty high. The boys’ nonstop chatter had momentarily ceased, and that was an indication that they were getting tired.

“Did you guys have dinner?” I found the strength to ask.

Jason nodded eagerly. “Our grandma, Grams, cooked chicken, green stuff, and macaroni and cheese.”

“Green stuff?”

“Cabbage,” Jeovanni’s chuckle came out in a light rumble as the elevator stopped on his floor.

He stepped off leading the way. Jason and Jordan were right behind him followed by me. The hallway of Jeovanni’s floor was much longer than mine, and I was grateful that his unit wasn’t far from the elevator. I remained silent as we crossed the threshold of his condo, but the boys were very vocal with their admiration.

“Wooowwwwwww,” Jordan marveled as he stopped in the middle of the living room and took in the view. We had floor to ceiling windows in our condo, but Jeovanni seemed to have more and compared to ours, his place was huge.

The space smelled of lemons, and the condo was clean enough to eat off the floors. Not one thing seemed out of place. There wasn’t a speck of dust anywhere, and the décor was simply stunning. If his condo looked like this, I could only imagine what his home looked like. Even though I had issues with how Jeovanni made his money, I had to admit that he’d done quite well for himself.

“There are two bedrooms. You can have the master, and the boys can take the second.”

“What about you? Are you staying here with us?” Jason asked hopefully.

The way Jeovanni peered down at him made my heart swell. “Yeah, I’ll take the couch.”

“Yayyyyyyy!”

“Since you two have already eaten, it’s bath time. Bedtime is soon to come. We got a late start tonight. We have to get moving.”

“Dad flip a coin, so we can see who goes first,” Jordan looked up at Jeovanni making my brow hike.

I remembered when he and Jovani used to toss coins to determine who would do something. It seemed as if they’d passed the idea down to the kids.

“I got tails!” Jordan called out.

“I wanted tails.”

“Hey,” I warned softly. “Why is that you two can find anything to bicker about?”

Jason pushed out a defeated sigh, while Jeovanni pulled a coin from his pocket and tossed it in the air.

“Jordan, you’re first to go in my man.”

There were two bathrooms, so while Jeovanni tended to the boys, I took a shower. I was as impressed with the condo as our sons were. Jeovanni had great taste. If he was the one that decorated. Maybe he had an interior designer. Or maybe his girlfriend decorated…

The thought made a lump form in my throat. Jeovanni was spoken for. He found a woman that didn’t judge him for the way he made his money, and he finally settled down and did the relationship thing. Tears stung my eyes as I showered, and I wasn’t sure if I was crying because of the days’ events, my overall frustration with life, or from the searing jealousy coursing through my veins. God coming back to Ausnor Beach had been tough for me but wonderful for my sons. I only let a few tears fall before I allowed the shower water to wash them away. I would do anything for my sons, so if I had to sacrifice my happiness and deal with bullshit for them to finally have their father in their lives then I’d do it ten times over.

I caressed my sore neck and thought about the audacity of PJ. Thank God, I wasn’t so fooled by his charm that I’d given in and let him meet Jason and Jordan because his actions only confirmed my decision to cut him off. What he did in my office wasn’t something that he could ever come back from. As I dried off, it dawned on me that I was famished. I wasn’t sure what Jeovanni had in the kitchen, so I knew I may have to order something. By the time I did my skincare routine and got dressed in a pink pajama set, the condo was quiet, and Jeovanni was sitting on the couch with his head down. When it lifted, my heart skipped a beat. My God, he was so handsome.

“Did I really take that long? Are they asleep?”

Jeovanni pushed out a low chuckle. “Out like a light. I gave them pretty quick baths because I could tell they were tired. They were asleep before I could tuck them in good.”

I inched into the living room. “Thank you. For all of this. Um,” I cleared my throat. “What made you come by the office?” I hadn’t told Jeovanni where I worked.

“Your grandmother told me where you were. When I first got the boys, she said that I could just bring them back to her, and you’d get them when you got off. I kept them kind of late, so I called to see if you were at her house or had already gone home, and she said you still hadn’t come by, so you might be at work. I’m familiar with Tony and where the office is, so on a whim, I decided to go by. When I saw that the parking lot was fairly empty, but your car was still there, I decided to go up.”

I breathed a sigh of relief. “I’m glad you did.” I sat down at the other end of the couch.

“Fuck was that nigga’s problem?” he growled. Just that fast his mood had altered.

“He’s upset because after our disagreement at Jonah’s, I cut him off. When he showed up at my place I was pissed. So he popped up at the office smelling like alcohol just acting like a complete ass.”

Jeovanni didn’t respond. He just flexed his jaw muscles, and I knew that whatever ended up happening wouldn’t be pretty. I also knew him well enough to know that I wouldn’t be able to talk him out of doing anything to PJ. Jeovanni’s temper had been the same since we were kids. He was pretty much quiet and laid back until someone woke the sleeping giant. Then, there wasn’t anything that could be done to tame the beast that emerged. He wouldn’t calm down until he was ready. That could take minutes. Sometimes, it could take hours or even days.

I picked imaginary lint from my pajama pants. There was so much I wanted to say, but I didn’t know where to start. Or if I should say anything at all. Finally, I couldn’t resist. “I appreciate you staying for the boys. I hope it doesn’t cause any problems with your girlfriend.”

Jeovanni stared straight ahead. When he spoke, it wasn’t about his girlfriend. “I know how you are, so I think it’s only fair for you to know that you work for a piece of shit.” He turned his face in my direction.

“I kind of figured that out. He gave me a case where a doctor has been accused of sexual assault. The youngest victim is eight. He pretty much told me that he’s friends with the judge that will be presiding over my client’s first appearance.”

“You gonna get that nigga off?” Jeovanni’s eyes turned dark.

“I’ve been trying to decide if I want to resign. No, I don’t want the case, but when he told me he has a judge in his pocket, I realized that the piece of shit is going to get off regardless. I swear I hate myself for it, but I was contemplating just getting paid for the case before I quit. I have bills.” I shook my head. Saying the words out loud made me feel ashamed.

“Quit that job, and I’ll give you enough money to be straight for at least six months. Tony is involved in sex trafficking. If I have it my way, he won’t be your boss for long anyway. Whether he’s in hell or jail.”

My jaw slacked. “H-how do you know that?”

“Because he gets dope from me and Jovani, and he tried to get us in on it. The same way he got another doctor, a real estate broker, police officer, and a judge in on it. There are way more corrupt people in this world than one would think, and it’s not just the people holding down the blocks. They’re the people that put on suits. That are supposed to serve and protect. Be unbiased and fair. This muhfucka even sells babies on the black market supposedly to childless couples. He’s not shit.”

“Oh my God,” I whispered. I felt like I was going to be sick. “Oh my God,” I repeated. My heart rate increased, and I felt physically ill. I could be stubborn as hell and prideful. I didn’t want to have to depend on Jeovanni to pay my bills, but there was no way in hell I’d keep working for Mr. Waldorf. “Um, okay. I’ll um, I’ll help out at the bar if it’s okay with you. You’re not responsible for me, and I appreciate the offer because I will never…” it felt as if my chest caved in, and I couldn’t even finish speaking. I was speechless.

“I’ll see what I can do, but don’t worry about all that right now. I know you don’t like the way I make my money, but I have a lot of legit investments. Jonah’s is only one of them. Money is what I work for, but it doesn’t mean that much to me that I’m tight with it. I don’t mind helping people. I’m about to go take a shower.”

As I stared out of the window, all I could do was shake my head. I felt like I was living in the Twilight Zone.