Chapter 2 #2
There was a secluded sitting area out by the parking garage, where only a few people would walk by with keys jingling in their hands.
Benson had walked. Liam had probably Ubered.
Short of dragging his ex back to his place – again – Benson would rather chat here.
He only had a few things to say, anyway.
“She’s very understanding,” Benson said once they stood in front of each other in the alcove. Although there were two chairs there, neither moved to have a seat. “I’m not used to that when the truth comes out.”
“How long did you think you could get away without saying anything to her?” Liam chastised. “Did you think she wouldn’t figure it out?”
“You never told her. That dinner was her first time hearing about your inclinations.”
“You complicated things, sir.”
Benson hated the sarcastic way Liam called him sir, and that had been true in their relationship, too. “Whatever. That’s not the point.”
“All right. What’s the point, Ben?”
He had to glance away before he stared too long in those glistening eyes that always seemed to see everything in the room.
Liam had the cunning ability to absorb everything around him.
That included “vibes,” as he called them.
Within two minutes in a nightclub or someone’s private party, Liam could tell his fiancé if they should stay or go.
Which was much needed, because as much as Benson could party once he got into things, his initial reaction to any gathering was fucking leave.
“I’m in love with Eden,” Benson confessed, “and I’m going to keep dating her as long as she’ll have me.”
Liam visibly swallowed, which gave Benson a little more confidence. “I see. I’m happy for you, then. You deserve to be in love, Ben.”
Despite the crack in his voice, Benson didn’t feel confident. “But?”
The little twitch at the corner of Liam’s mouth was… infuriating. Or, at least, that was hot blood rushing through Benson’s veins as he beheld it. Infuriatingly annoying. He was compelled to clear his throat. Infuriatingly hot. Of course this man still had “it.”
“But I’m not going to give up that easily. I am also pretty wild about Eden. To the point that I’m thinking of all the places I want to take her…” He lowered his voice, leaning forward. “All the things I wanna do to her.”
“Oh, fuck you.”
“I’m serious. I’m not gonna break up with her just so you can have her. We’re either all-in on an arrangement or she’s gonna choose one of us.”
“Don’t be absurd.”
“About what?”
“About us…” Benson almost couldn’t say it. “This isn’t like the old times. We’re not all moving into the same condo so we can pass her back and forth every night.”
“Well, that was good enough five years ago, now wasn’t it?”
“I love her,” Benson reiterated. “I didn’t have a problem with her dating someone else before, but I’m going to ask her to be exclusive with me soon. So, get her out of your system.”
Liam scoffed.
“What?”
“Get her out of my system? I could tell you the same thing. Besides, she saw a million fucking stars the other night. We’re like two dates away from DP-ing that gorgeous girl.”
“Get that out of your mouth.”
“Why? Because I put it in your head?” Liam taunted him with a finger waving before his face. “I’m not asking us to get back together. I know how stupid that would be. But we both want the same woman for a damn good reason. We can be friendly about this, Ben. We don’t have to be rivals.”
“You’re not the type to be content always being the third wheel.”
“What third wheel?”
“Eden’s lease is up in a couple of months. I’m gonna ask her to move in with me. I’ll be damned if she moves in with you.”
“Why? Because then it will be more difficult for you to feel her up every night?”
“More like I don’t want to imagine you getting to do it every night.”
“Ben.”
“What?”
This whole time, they never raised their voices. Instead, they hissed at one another as if they conspired to overthrow a Fortune 500 company instead of fighting over the same woman. “Don’t do this. Don’t make this more complicated than it has to be.”
“Why shouldn’t I? She’s the one I want.”
“This whole time, you’re going on about her, but you’re not stating the obvious…”
“Which is?”
Liam shook his head. “If she was fate, then so was I.”
Benson chewed on his cheek as he stewed in that. “For the love of fuck, stop messing with my head like that.”
“What are you talking about?” Exasperated, Liam tossed his arms out to the side before slapping his hands against his hips. “I’m not messing with your head! I’m just stating the truth!”
“Which is?”
The two men stared down one another, waiting for the other to speak.
This reminds me so much of… Their entire relationship.
Benson getting lost in his thoughts, and Liam attempting to translate.
Liam getting frustrated while Benson felt guiltier.
They were their happiest with a woman between them – this was true.
But when they were alone like this? Attempting to figure out their future?
I loved him. I couldn’t stand him. Benson had finally gotten over Liam a couple of years ago.
Now here he was again, the same age, while Benson had grown gray hairs.
Looking into those eyes reminded Benson of a time when he truly didn’t give a shit.
When he was willing to buck the status quo and go all-in with what his heart truly desired.
Liam hadn’t just been his match – he had been Benson’s equal.
A man slightly younger than him, who wasn’t afraid to live in the moment, while having a heart of gold.
Who else would keep Benson from diving into a drink at the worst time?
Who else would throw a pillow and the prescription he had picked up at the pharmacy when Benson was ill?
Twice. He did that twice. And what other man had made love to Benson, proving that male sexuality wasn’t all libido, no romance?
They had always wanted the same things. Benson’s big mouth had ruined it.
Which was why he held back… from doing what he really wanted.
This man…
That man’s finger was soon in Benson’s chest. “Don’t make me do it, Ben,” Liam said, hushed. “Don’t make me try to win her from you.”
“Why the fuck not?”
Their noses were inches away from each other. Benson was taller, but Liam had the presence of a lion who had won every battle for dominance in his pride. Size didn’t matter. Benson was the first to know that confidence and experience often won out in the end.
And Liam had both in spades. Benson had never known a man more self-assured in his life. It’s always made me jealous. And in love.
“Because I don’t want to break your heart when I win.”
Benson had every intention of shoving Liam away from him. Save it for the bedroom. Where the three of them would inevitably end up again. So we can get more fucked up.
But he didn’t push his ex away. Nor did Liam extract himself.
“I’m sorry.” Were those the words Benson read in Liam’s eyes before they crashed together, reliving the best moments of their engagement?
It was inevitable. Since reuniting, they had been exchanging looks, dropping hints, and attempting to be “good” with each other, in the sense that they had moved on and had no desire to reignite the old passions that had brought them together.
Despite the fact that we get along perfectly when I’m not such an asshole.
And despite the fact that Benson had never kissed a man who made him feel as complete as this.
Most men were only in it for the brief connection they could share somewhere.
A dark nightclub. The backseat of a Maserati.
The damn coat closet or men’s restroom in a restaurant like this.
The shit I’ve done in hot tubs… Benson rarely saw the same guy twice.
That had been part of the appeal at first.
Then he met Liam. Who kissed like this. Like he wanted to do it for the rest of his life.
Fuck, fuck, fuck! Yet the more Benson thought that, the more he leaned into it, as if pushing Liam up against the wall would prove a stupid point.
I’m better. I’m stronger. I’m going to win. You’ll see. Yet was it really winning if Benson had succumbed to his ex like this?
Was it winning if Liam flung his arms around Benson and kissed him with all his might?
“Ahem.” Benson ejected himself off Liam as if someone had thrown dynamite between them. Yet it was “just” Ken, who stood in the hallway linking the building to the parking garage with his travel coat over his arm. “My, my. Don’t stop on my account.”
Benson had barely caught his breath when he gestured toward Ken. “Don’t tell anyone.”
One manicured eyebrow went up Ken’s forehead. “Of course not. Except my wife.”
“Don’t tell your wife!”
“But she was so invested in you two. She’ll be happy to know that you’ve been caught sucking face again.”
Liam smacked his head against the wall and laughed. “Tell her whatever you want.”
Ken twiddled his fingers in goodbye. Benson swung on Liam as soon as the other man was gone.
“What?” Liam asked. “Gonna invite me over to your place?”
“Absolutely not.”
“I see.”
“I had to get that out of my system.”
“I see.”
“Don’t tell Eden.”
“There is so much you never want me telling anyone.”
“Guess some things haven’t changed.”
Liam shrugged. “I guess not.”
He fixed his wrinkled jacket before heading in the other direction. Benson remained in the small alcove, eventually sinking into one of the chairs and covering his face with his hands.
He sat there for a long while, attempting to remember how to breathe.