Chapter 13 #3
And now… the doctors have sent me a pretty alpha. I give myself half a second to admire him before shutting it all down. I’m exhausted, and even though Dr. Kind thinks he caught me sleeping, my body just gave up for a while and passed out.
It was not pleasant or restful. The fluorescent lights were so bright, it overloaded my brain. Even now, I can taste the metallic scent of the lights.
I can’t speak because my throat is throbbing from the coughing fit and how parched I feel. The facility is really pushing it with the dehydration tactics. If I die, does this mean they win, or do they have to return my mother's money? It would almost be worth hurting the institution fiscally .
It’s a passing thought, and my head lolls to the side. It’s too heavy to keep up. Everything is just too hard…
“Hey,” a honeyed voice says. “Wake up, Nina, and drink some water. Come on.”
Grunting, I raise my head an inch, and the alpha’s warm hand encases my chin to lift it the rest of the way so I can sip the water he tips from the cup into my mouth. I don’t know when he went to get it, but God does it feel good.
It doesn’t matter that the water is freezing and hurts my teeth as I swallow, and I don’t care that it doesn’t taste all that great. I can’t be picky, even if I am usually a water snob.
The cup is taken away too soon, and I whine pitifully.
Damn. I’ve been doing so well not allowing them to diminish who I am, yet here I am wanting to cry tears I can’t afford because I can’t have any more water.
Swallowing hard despite it feeling like shards of glass, I focus on the discomfort to ground myself.
I also curl my toes until they cramp and flex my fingers. The pins and needles from my arms also help, and I find a small spark inside of me that still exists as I glare up at Riley.
What a dumb name for an alpha. He won’t get even a passing glance from me of admiration again. Fuck Riley.
“Are you making me the enemy in your head, Nina?” he asks, smirking. “I suppose, to you, it appears that I am. Don’t you want to be better?”
“There’s nothing wrong with me,” I rasp, the water having helped. “I’d rather be electrocuted by Nurse Naylor than speak to you or dropped in a black pool of water with my arms tied behind my back.”
His hazel eyes widen a bit before hardening. He’s just like everyone else in this place. His sympathy and kindness in the moment is only so I’ll live long enough so he can fuck me over.
“You and I could work together,” he says, shrugging, releasing my chin. I force myself to keep my head up, telling myself I can fuel myself with my anger.
“Fuck off,” I whisper. “I’ll never forget my alphas. ”
“I hope you don’t,” he whispers back, surprising me. “I doubt you’re going to have a choice though. What’s so special about them? Surely, they’re like any other alpha.”
“They’re nothing like you,” I murmur. “Ethan has kind eyes, is full of passion, and is mine. Cooper protects me, and gives me what I need.”
I don’t know what gets into me to tell him even that much, but it makes me realize something.
I don’t remember what they smell like. I don’t remember the sound of their voices, or what their laughs are like. In the time I’ve been here, I’m already forgetting things.
What kind of omega am I? How…how are they erasing them?
I’m breathing heavily, and this makes me spiral more than anything else that’s been done to me. I was with Ethan and Cooper for such a short period of time, yet I know we were building something important. They both had plans for us.
So why can’t I fucking remember?
“What are you thinking about?” Riley asks.
Black spots are slowly forming in my vision as I hyperventilate, my mind telling me that I’m not worthy of their affection or love because I can’t remember them.
“I can’t remember,” I gasp.
Maybe the doctor was right to send someone new, if only to make me realize that I’m a terrible omega. Maybe I really don’t deserve to have scent matched alphas.
I don’t realize I’m keening in sorrow until he steps back and glances at the door as it opens.
“Oh, this is progress,” Dr. Brunes murmurs, stepping inside the room.
“Fuck you!” I scream, uncaring that I know he has a taser in his hand. He typically does when I see him, a little reminder of the pain that lies at Weeping Willow.
“I think you need a nap,” he says, moving over to shove the taser under my arm to make my body twitch and shudder. “If you need something to scream about, it would be my pleasure to give it to you. Orderly!”
The orderly who is holding open the door steps inside the small room with a syringe, smirking with dead eyes.
“Tell me what the patient is experiencing,” Dr. Brunes commands Riley.
“Extreme stress and sadness,” he murmurs. “She seems to be preoccupied with her alphas and still has firm memories of them.”
Riley lied. My body is twitching from fatigue and pain, and I can’t respond. I never said that to him, in fact I almost said the exact opposite. Except, Dr. Brunes will never know that because the cameras don’t have audio.
I’m unsure if the alpha knows this or is making shit up for whatever narrative he wants to spin. I for damn sure can’t say any different.
“I’m going to prescribe a nap and then we’ll move to a different therapy,” the doctor says. “I think it’s time to change things up.”
“N…no,” I gasp. Dr. Brunes still has the taser against the small opening in my shirt where there’s bare skin.
Over time, I’ve lost layers of clothing, and the oversized shirt is the only thing covering me. It barely touches the middle of my thighs, leaving me feeling exposed.
“Yes,” he hisses. Pocketing the taser, he takes the syringe from the orderly. “I am in charge of your body, your life, and your mind. Whatever I deem necessary, is what will happen.”
The sting of the syringe in my neck is the last thing I’m aware of before my lids slide shut.
I’m never getting out of here, and now I don’t think I deserve to.