Chapter 9 Asher
ASHER
“I’d like to speak with you privately,” I told Zach once he released me from his hug.
The restaurant was filling up with families wanting to eat and others who needed a beer before heading home. This wasn’t a conversation I wanted overheard.
He nodded. “My place is a ten-minute drive outside of town.”
I followed his truck along Main Street past the edge to town where the buildings gave way to forest and the road turned from paved to gravel. His house was tucked into a clearing surrounded on all sides by pine trees. When I climbed out of my vehicle, I caught the scent of woodsmoke.
“It’s small, but it’s mine, and I don’t have to share my space like I did in the den.”
Heat was radiating from a wood stove when we walked in, and one wall was lined with bookshelves. Zach was a reader. I liked that. Learning about the outside world hadn’t been prioritized in the den, which had been impressed upon me even at the age of six.
I sat on the worn couch while he poured coffee from a pot that had been keeping warm on the stove.
“So, what’s on your mind?” He took the armchair opposite me. “I’m guessing this is complicated or it’s a secret and you didn’t want humans to overhear.”
It’d been hard enough spilling the details to Anita, but where did I start with Zach? Or perhaps it was easier because his emotions wouldn’t be involved.
“There's a human scientist in town. He's here to study polar bears, and I suspect that involves tagging and tracking them to figure out why they settled so far from where they should be.”
Zach furrowed his brow. “I’d heard rumors, but this is the first time it’s been confirmed.”
I took a deep breath. “But there’s more. The scientist, Weston, he’s my mate.”
Zach took a huge gulp of coffee, and even after he swallowed, he didn’t speak.
“I’m not finished.”
He tossed the rest of the hot liquid down his throat and poured himself another cup. “Okay, hit me with it.”
“We slept together, and he bit me.” I tapped the scar. “But because he doesn’t know who I am or what we are, I fled while he was sleeping and didn’t mark him.” I explained that Weston wasn’t aware of what he’d done, at least not consciously.
Zach had a unique perspective on shifter and human dynamics because one of his parents was a shifter and the other human.
He did have a beast, but because of the human element, he understood their thought processes.
The den looked on him as an outsider because of his human DNA, so his suspicions about my stepfather would have made it easier to leave the den than for others.
“That’s unusual not to reciprocate, but I get why you hesitated.”
“How could I?” The frustration I'd been holding back was evident in my voice. “If I'd bitten him without an explanation, what would he think? That I was not to be trusted.” And once trust was lost, it wasn’t easy to regain it.
“But you are going to tell him.”
“If we’re to be in one another’s lives, yes.” If Weston ran, would I run after him, or leave it to fate to return him if and when? I couldn’t answer that. “He might not accept who I am.”
“And you’ll deal with that because you won’t have a choice.”
I switched topics because this was becoming a rerun of what Anita had said.
“My purpose in coming to town was to warn the den about Weston, but I met him, and at first I wasn’t aware who he was.” Maybe it was just as well I wasn’t my father’s heir because he would never have put personal business before the den’s safety.
Zach got up and put his mug in the sink before leaning on the kitchen counter.
“Asher, the den needs you.”
Had he been inside my head? Because I’d been thinking the exact opposite.
“They don’t know I’m alive.”
“That doesn't change the fact that they need you.” He stared out the window at the snow falling. “A human scientist interfering in the den way of life, maybe in the bears’ existence, is a threat, and as the Alpha's son, it’s your duty to protect them.”
How could I love my mate and treat him as my equal and yet give the den advance knowledge of his presence? Someone was going to get hurt. Me definitely because I would either lose Weston—not that I had him yet—or allow the den to be destroyed. I was a loser in all of this.
That’s a selfish way of looking at it.
Oh yeah, what’s your suggestion?
You know what you have to do.
“How do I do both? Protect my mate and my kin?” They were on opposing sides.
Zach moved back to the chair. “Your mate isn’t aware of what he’s set in motion, and you’re looking at this all wrong.”
Zach wasn’t getting emotional like me. He hadn’t raised his voice and he wasn’t gripping the armchair like a life raft.
“You have to trust your mate. There is no greater bond than the one between mates. It surpasses loyalty to your current pack and to the den. I suspect your bear understands that.”
I do, but you’ve been looking at this through a human’s eyes.
“But you also have a duty to the den,” Zach continued. "Whether they know you're alive or not. They're still your blood, and it’s your responsibility as the Alpha's firstborn.”
Everyone today had told me what I had to do, but no one had provided a roadmap.
“You need to find a way to have both your mate and the den in your life.”
How had we gotten to this point? Being part of the den wasn’t in my plan. I was going to warn them and help them, not join them and lead them to battle.
“Do I want both?” If Weston accepted me, I was going to return to the pack, the same pack that allowed me to be curious while providing love and safety.
“You’re not a helpless six-year-old anymore. You survived things that should have killed you, and you forced a shift years before you should have been able to.”
My beast was loyal and very strong, but neither of us had confronted the early shift and what it meant for our future.
“Your bear is powerful. Use that and find a way.”
I stared at the now-cold coffee. In theory, what Zach said made sense. But the reality of standing between Weston and the den and trying to bridge two worlds that had no reason to trust each other felt impossible.
“Tell me about the den.” I had a six-year-old’s understanding of the inner workings that were very different to reality. “What do I need to know?”
Zach pursed his lips, and I braced myself for what he was about to say.
“How much do you remember about your father and how life was before he mated your stepfather?”
“Not much. I was only six. Why?”
“Firstly, Kipp was pregnant when you disappeared.”
Now the pieces fell into place. It wasn’t just that I was the son of the former Alpha Omega, but Kipp wanted his offspring to be Father’s successor.
“A son or daughter?”
“A son, and from what I’ve observed, though from a distance, he's nothing like his omega father. Things have changed since you left, and the den isn't what it was." He stood again and moved to the window. “Your father is still Alpha, but he's weaker, maybe. Kipp has a lot of influence.”
So he got rid of me, not just for his child, but to wrest power from Father.
“Some of the den think he should be the next Alpha when your father steps down.”
The blood in my veins turned to ice. What if Kipp was planning on getting rid of Father as he had me?
The answer to my next question had the power to break me.
“How did Father react when I disappeared?” He’d been away, so who knew how long it’d been before he was informed.
“Your father loved you. I believe that. But he also loved Kipp. When he had to choose between believing his mate was a murderer or believing his son had an accident, he chose the version that let him keep his family intact and his sanity.”
His words hurt. I’d always suspected that my father hadn't looked for me or questioned Kipp’s story. My beast was outraged and he clawed my insides.
“Your father made the wrong choice. That doesn't change what you need to do now.”