Chapter 20
CHAPTER TWENTY
By the time they all got out on the beach after breakfast the next morning, the sun was already intense. Seagulls soaring overhead were dark shapes against the bright orange light. Nora adjusted her sunglasses and self-consciously tightened her cover-up around her torso, not comfortable bearing all in her new bikini in front of Blaze. The personal-professional line wasn’t just blurred at this point, it was nonexistent, and she had to maintain some professionalism. She settled into the chair next to Gram while Blaze set up two more for himself and Ivy.
“Hey, Ivy!” Jake jogged down the beach toward them from his cottage. When he reached them, he brushed his floppy hair off his forehead, and waved at Ivy.
“Wanna paddleboard?” He tossed a thumb over his shoulder toward his cottage where two brightly colored boards jutted out from the sand.
“Yeah.” Ivy dropped her journal into the empty chair Blaze had set up for her. Then she turned to Blaze and under her breath mumbled, “I’m gonna hang with Jake.”
“Okay,” he said.
Gram sat down next to Nora and opened her book, setting her new bookmark on the arm of the chair. Blaze slipped his sunglasses on and leaned back in the sun. Soon, Ivy and Jake were balanced on their boards, their paddles moving slowly in the quiet surf.
“Looks fun,” Blaze said.
Nora squinted at Ivy and Jake. “I wonder if it’s harder than it seems.”
“You could give it a try,” Gram suggested. “The rental information said there’s equipment in the storage room under the porch.” She waggled her eyebrows at Nora when Blaze wasn’t looking.
Nora stifled a grin. Gram had seemed to be herself all morning, so Nora was pretty sure she’d misread her grandmother’s expression over the hospital paper last night, to her relief.
Blaze leaned forward. “Want to try it?”
“Are you serious?” Nora asked, ignoring Gram’s googly eyes behind her.
“Why not?” He stood up. “June, do you know if the storage door is unlocked?”
“The key is in the dish on the counter by the fridge.”
“Be right back.”
When Blaze left for the cottage, Nora turned to Gram. “I wasn’t planning to take off my cover-up. I’m Ivy’s teacher. I don’t think it’s a good idea to prance around in my swimsuit.”
“If you were on vacation, and Blaze was in the cottage next door, he’d see you in your swimsuit.”
“But he isn’t. He’s sleeping in our house. What would my school officials say?”
Gram shook her head. “Your school officials need to loosen up. You’re a grown woman. And you’re doing nothing wrong. It’s not like you’re dating him or anything.”
“What if I fall off the thing? That could be embarrassing.”
“Or fun,” Gram countered.
“Speak for yourself. I’ll make you go out on that thing,” she teased.
Gram chuckled. “I would if I could.”
Blaze returned with a board under each arm. He dropped them and released the Velcro straps holding the paddles onto each board.
“Wanna jump on one?” he asked Nora.
Parasailing was adventure enough, and at least with that she was fully clothed…
“Stop thinking so much.” He tossed a paddle toward her, the long thing landing with a thud on the sand. “Just do it.”
Blaze grabbed the hem of his shirt and yanked it upward, and all Nora could see were biceps and pecs. He draped his shirt over the chair, then he picked up his board and paddle and carried them down to the water.
Nora took a second to regain her composure.
Jake and Ivy paddled closer to him. Blaze adjusted the height of the paddle and took the board past the break of the waves. Then he climbed up on it and sat on his knees.
“Come on!” he called up the beach to her.
“Go on. Don’t leave the poor man hanging,” Gram said.
With a deep breath, Nora stood up from her chair. She dawdled, fiddling with the tie of her cover-up, still deciding. She pulled the tie loose.
Blaze waved her in again.
She tentatively shimmied off her cover-up, revealing her bikini. She picked up the board, dragging the back end of it in the sand as she paced down to the water, feeling exposed.
Ivy waved from her board, unfazed by Nora’s attire, wobbling before she found her balance again. She and Jake moved in unison.
Blaze was still bobbing in the water on his knees. “Make sure your paddle’s the right height. Jake just said it should be six inches above your head.”
“Hey there.” Ivy paddled over. She helped Nora steady the board. “Climb onto it, and I’ll show you how to paddle. Jake just showed me, and it’s easy.”
Nora got onto her knees, and the board seemed stable.
“You’re gonna want the board to be moving when you try to stand up,” Jake said, “so use your paddle to come out to us.”
Nora and Blaze started paddling.
“Now, turn so the wind is behind you. This way.” The boy pointed in an easterly direction.
Nora complied. She and Blaze were both managing, and it took so much focus to keep her balance that she forgot all about her exposed body. She tried to get up on her board while Blaze was busy doing the same. Quickly, she placed her feet wide on either side of the board’s handle and stood up, swaying slightly. She shifted her weight on her toes to maintain stability.
“Look! Ms. Jenkins is a natural,” Ivy said.
Blaze finally hopped to his feet, lost his balance, and pivoted off the board and into the Gulf. He surfaced, shaking the water from his hair and wiping his eyes. “How are you doing that?”
Ivy giggled and Nora stifled her amusement.
As he climbed back up on the board and got onto his knees, Nora turned her gaze to her paddle to avoid gawking at the water glistening off his rounded muscles.
“I went slowly, got the board moving, and then placed my feet carefully. I’d take a wide stance. It seems to help with balance.”
He tried again, pushing the board forward with his paddle.
“Now gently place your feet where you want them. One at a time,” Nora instructed.
Blaze worked slowly and rose to a standing position. “Hey, there we go,” he said.
Ivy and Jake paddled out further while Nora and Blaze hung back.
“How did you figure out how to get up on your board so quickly?” Blaze asked.
“I don’t know,” Nora replied. “I just felt it.”
“I like that,” he said, his eyes on her. He paddled up next to her board. “Moving on feeling is how I live my life. It might not be perfect, but it’s gotten me this far.”
“Maybe I should move more on feeling. You’re certainly convincing me this week.”
There was a fondness in his eyes when he looked at her that she couldn’t deny. And it scared her to death because she probably shouldn’t even be out here with him, let alone feel the way she was feeling about him.
* * *
With the sun now below the horizon, Blaze and Nora were relaxing in the secluded quiet of the porch, while Ivy scrolled through her phone on the sofa in the living room. The sun had completely disappeared, producing a mass of stars in its wake. Gram had turned in for the night, and Nora had decided the clear skies were too lovely to sit inside.
Blaze came out onto the porch, carrying two glasses of wine.
“Ivy’s asleep,” he said, handing Nora a glass. “So I guess we’re the lone survivors of the day.” He sat down next to her on the porch swing.
“I guess so,” she said before taking a sip of the crisp, sweet wine. The humidity had worn off, leaving a light breeze. “It’s so nice tonight. I’ll bet it’s room temperature down by the water right now.”
“Why don’t we take our glasses and go for a walk on the beach?” Blaze asked.
“That sounds wonderful.”
They descended the long staircase from the porch to the sand below and followed the wooden path over the dune to the beach. The sand was soft on her bare feet. The gentle rhythm of the waves and the slight buzz from the wine made her forget everything but the moment with Blaze.
“This is nice,” he said. “The last few days have made me realize I don’t slow down enough.”
“I feel the same way. I’ve never taken a long vacation like this.”
The water shushed toward them and bubbled over their feet.
“I’ve been on a lot of trips, some even for vacation, but I didn’t rest. I stayed busy and filled every minute.” He peered over at her, the moonlight glimmering off the glass of wine hanging by its rim from his fingertips. “I think I know why.”
She held her hair back to keep the wind from blowing it into her eyes. “Why?”
“Because I didn’t have anyone to share it with.” He stopped and faced her. “Taking this walk is more interesting than anything that could fill my schedule. I enjoy talking with you.”
He started walking again, and she followed.
“Why?” She couldn’t help but ask, given the incredibly fascinating people he hung out with.
“I find what you have to say fascinating. And you don’t want anything from me. You seem as happy as I am just walking and drinking a glass of wine.” He held up his glass and took a sip.
“I find you pretty fascinating too,” she admitted, glad for the darkness to hide the heat that rose in her cheeks. “I’ve never met anyone quite like you.”
“I hope that’s a good thing?”
Amusement swelled in her chest. “Yes. It’s a good thing.”
“How am I different from other people you know?”
She splashed in the water with her next step, sending a sprinkle onto her shins. “You don’t seem to follow rules.”
He laughed. “I follow rules.”
“Not right-or-wrong rules. Those unwritten rules that we have to get good grades, go to college, get a nine-to-five job with a 401(k) and still come home and work until we fall asleep. You don’t do that. I wonder what it was within you that ignored all that and followed your passion.”
He frowned. “I don’t know. A typical life never occurred to me.”
“That’s what makes you intriguing. Eighty-five million of us in this country don’t know what you inherently know: how to survive outside the traditional workforce. We find something we don’t hate doing that kind of fits our talents. Many of us don’t even really understand what our true talents are. But for you, it’s so easy. You move through the world just knowing.”
The corner of his mouth lifted as he seemed to consider the idea.
“I don’t even know what my talents are, or if I really have any,” Nora admitted.
“Of course you do. You might not have found them yet, but everyone has talents. Personally, I think your talent is connecting to people.”
“I should rephrase my statement. I haven’t found my passion . I know I’m good at connecting with people, but I haven’t found that thing that makes me whole. I watched you in the recording studio, and you lit up like a lightbulb. Your talent and passion work together, and you’re unstoppable.”
To her surprise, he took her hand and stopped her. He guided her down to the sand and she sat next to him, facing the water.
“We’re going to figure this out,” he said.
“I doubt we’ll do it tonight,” she said lightly.
“Probably not, but we can try.” He tipped his head back, his gaze moving up to the stars. “If money were no object, and you didn’t have to work, what would you want to do?”
“Probably travel the world.”
He looked at her. “No wonder you haven’t found your passion.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, you had every answer available to you, and you chose world travel, so that means traveling interests you. And have you traveled the world?”
“No.”
“Then how will you find your passion?”
She chuckled. “So I’m supposed to quit my job, leave my grandmother, and travel the world just in case it’s my passion?”
“You don’t have to do it all at once. You’ve made a good start. You’ve ventured to Florida for these two weeks, the southernmost state in our country. Next trip, push yourself a little farther.”
“What about Gram? She might not be able to travel so much.”
“Well, when you decide to travel, call me, and I’ll check in on her.”
She laughed at his little joke, but he put his hand on her shoulder, the gesture silencing her.
“That wasn’t meant to be funny. I’m serious.” He looked out at the water. “I haven’t been great at doing things for others, and I’d do that for you.”
“Thank you,” she said, the rest of her words unavailable in that instant. His kindness and candor had muddled her mind.
They continued to chat for a few minutes more before Nora suggested they return to the cottage and head in for the night. They stood up and brushed the sand off them. As they walked together, a strange sort of solidarity hung between them, and she wondered where it might go in the morning.
They rinsed off their feet in the outdoor spigot, and then he offered to tackle the kitchen cleanup if she took care of the porch.
“We’ll tag team it,” he said.
While Blaze was inside, she couldn’t shake how normal he seemed when he was out of his element. He was nothing like his public persona. All those glamorous photos, wearing designer suits with his arm draped around the biggest stars seemed miles away. She gazed in through the window at him rinsing dishes at the sink, as she collected the remaining glasses. But this side of him wasn’t his real life. In a matter of days he’d be back in the studio or on a plane, off to find the next big star.
“I can’t find that metal cork stopper we were using for the wine bottle,” Blaze said when she came inside, “I hope I didn’t throw it away.” He went over to the trash can and peered into it.
“There’s mostly paper in there anyway. I can wash it if you did.” She set all the glasses next to the sink. “I’ll just have a quick look.” Nora stared into the trash can, moving a few things around. “Are you sure it’s not on the counter?”
Blaze paced the kitchen, quietly lifting things and moving knickknacks. “I don’t see it.” He bent down and checked the floor.
“We can do a better job of looking in the morning. I’m going to wash up, and then I’m heading to bed. It’s been a nice evening.”
“Yes, it has.” He stood terrifyingly close to her, looking down at her as if he wanted to say something. “Well, good night.” He disappeared down the hallway and into his room.
She wanted to throw caution to the wind and see where things went with Blaze this week, but her rational side stopped her. Moving past where they were would open up a whole lot of issues. And even if she wasn’t Ivy’s school counselor, the beach atmosphere was such a departure from their normal lives. It was magical here. She couldn’t begin to imagine herself in Blaze’s real world. She wouldn’t fit into it. Not to mention the fact that Ivy needed to grieve her mother and establish normalcy with her dad before introducing a new dynamic. Leaning into her growing feelings for Blaze was a bad idea on every level.
She shook off her thoughts and focused on reality. She figured she’d check the trash for the metal wine stopper one more time.
Nora lifted the empty paper plates that sat on top of the pile, trying to see if she could locate the stopper. She moved a napkin out of the way and noticed the familiar hospital letterhead. It wasn’t like Gram to throw away a receipt. She kept them for five years for taxes; she had files of them. Nora pulled out the paper to view it in the light and scanned the wording.
Recommendation: Ultrasound-guided left breast biopsy of indeterminate mass at the 1–1:30 position…
Biopsy? Mass? So it isn’t a receipt … Nora checked the date; it was months ago. Gram hadn’t said anything at all.
Nora folded the paper and put it into her pocket. Then she fished around a little more for the wine top. Unable to find it, she washed her hands and went into the bedroom with Gram. As she got ready for bed in the bathroom, her mind was going a hundred miles an hour. Why hadn’t Gram told her? Gram’s behavior had been different lately: the beach trip, seeing Gramps in her dreams, organizing everything, treating herself to that cinnamon roll when she usually wouldn’t…
Nora had been right—she’d seen fear in her grandmother’s eyes when she’d mentioned this paper. Had Gram tried to hide it by burying it in the trash? Had she already had the biopsy? Was Gram facing something and had yet to break the news to Nora?
* * *
It had taken Nora ages to fall asleep after seeing the hospital letter to Gram, and just as she’d gotten deep into slumber, she was aware of something tapping her.
“Nora.”
It was barely a whisper, so quiet she wondered if she was dreaming.
“Nora.”
Gramps’s voice sounded younger than it had in life. Was he here to give her a message about Gram? Did he have the answers?
Then the tapping became a hand jostling her.
“Nora.”
She opened her eyes and blinked to adjust to the darkness. In the moonlight, she made out Blaze’s face over her and sat up. He took her hand, quietly leading her out into the living room where Ivy’s sofa bed was empty.
“Where is she?” Nora asked, still trying to wake up.
“I have no idea.” He held up his phone. “Her location isn’t coming through, and she’s not answering my texts.” He ran his fingers through his hair, pacing the room. “I got up to have a glass of water and saw she was gone.”
“Have you looked outside to see if she’s on the porch?”
“Yes. I’ve been outside, around the house, down the beach to that kid’s cottage, and all around their property. All their lights are off. Her car’s still in the driveway.”
“Hm. Then maybe she decided to take a walk?”
“In the dead of night on a secluded beach?” He lunged over to the back window and looked outside then shook his head and checked his phone. “What the hell is she thinking?”
“Let’s get in the car and see if we can find her. Gram’s here if she comes back before we do. I’ll leave a note.”
While Nora searched the drawers for a pen and paper, Blaze darted off to his room and returned with his car key. She found a small pad and scribbled down a quick note on the counter for Gram in case she woke up.
Blaze took her hand, that unifying element between them surging.
“Let’s go.”
They climbed into Blaze’s car, and he pulled onto the dark country road. He put the windows down, calling Ivy’s name as they drove, parallel to the coast.
“She can’t just leave whenever she feels like it,” Blaze said.
“We don’t know if she’s done anything yet.”
“She absolutely has. She got upset with me, and now she’s running away like she did when she came here. She can’t run from me every time I try to be her parent.” His jaw clenched before he barked Ivy’s name out the window.
He handed Nora his phone. “My passcode is 3954. Can you check the Family Monitor app to see if her location shows now?”
Nora opened Blaze’s phone, the device large in her hand. All those videos and stories—this was what he’d recorded them on. It had probably been in his pocket while he mingled with the rich and famous. She opened the app and clicked on Ivy’s name.
“It located her.” She held out the phone to Blaze. “Turn left in about a mile.”
“Keep the screen open so we won’t lose her if we drive out of cellular range.”
“It’s good to know she didn’t intentionally turn off her phone,” Nora said.
“Yeah, but she hasn’t responded. That’s on her.”
The engine revved as Blaze hit the gas, only slowing down to make the turn. He peered over at his phone and then squinted in front of them. “This is a public beach access,” he said, parking the car next to the only other vehicle in the parking lot and getting out.
Nora followed, stepping close to him in case there were anything amiss. They walked up the steps and down the long boardwalk to the beach. In the moonlight, a couple was lying on a blanket in the sand. Nora recognized the oatmeal-colored sundress.
Just then, Ivy popped up, her eyes wide as she scrambled to her feet. She awkwardly reached down and picked up her phone as Jake roused.
“I fell asleep,” Ivy said, as Jake got to his feet, groggy.
“Get to the car,” Blaze said in an even but forceful tone.
“I didn’t mean to. I just?—”
“GET to the car!” He turned to Jake. “Is that your ride in the parking lot?”
“Yes, sir.” Jake’s gaze was on the sand.
“I suggest you get in it and we’ll follow you home.”
“Yes, sir.”
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Ivy whispered as Jake passed her.
When they got to their cars, Ivy slid into the back of Blaze’s. “Can I explain?” she asked as Blaze slammed his door and started the engine.
He gripped the shifter and Nora put her hand on his in an attempt to defuse his anger. The slight slump in his shoulders was a start.
“Jake texted and asked if I could go out to the beach with him to talk. I knew after the way I acted earlier, that you probably wouldn’t let me go. Plus, you wouldn’t let me meet up with him that late anyway. I didn’t think talking on the beach was a big deal, and you all were sleeping, so I wouldn’t disturb you. I’m sorry. We were just talking, and we laid back to watch the stars and fell asleep.”
Blaze didn’t answer, he just drove. Was that fear in his eyes?
At least Ivy was safe. But it was clearer to Nora than ever before that Blaze and Ivy needed guidance beyond anything she could provide.