Chapter 50
CHAPTER FIFTY
The last time Zolkan and I fought was the night before Zazt died.
We were killing time before our mission launch, trying to burn off some of the nervous energy neither of us could shake. For him, it was hope. And me…
I fucking knew better.
The thought swirled through my soul for orbits after that miserable day. Zolkan may have been the General, but he was an honorable, earnest male. He didn’t think like the deceptive Drakosians.
But I did.
I do.
He still can’t see it. His face is set into the pained solemnity of a male who truly believes I will kill him—and is fully prepared to let me.
Because now I’m certain: he would die for his mate.
Without ever letting a soul know he had.
How could I slaughter someone so noble?
Zolkan only knows that I said I would. He believes me, damn him. The same way he believed those Drakosians wanted a truce.
He is an honest male—and too true to suspect I have another motive.
I tackle him into the dirt, using his noble streak against him. It has always been his greatest weakness—he won’t fight dirty. Zazt used to get so frustrated with him over it.
By the second round, I remember why.
This fucker is so large and strong—not to mention the sheer power rolling off him—he doesn’t need tricks to beat anyone. He dominates without any of that shit.
Or he would, if he gave it his all.
Maybe another male wouldn’t notice. But I feel the slight slackness in his muscles. I see the lack of light in his eyes.
He wants to lose.
And that’s fucking infuriating.
“FIGHT ME,” I demand.
He is, technically. The Zortaire shifts under my weight, attempting to gain enough leverage to flip me. His elbows dig into the sandy ground, forehead misted with sweat and smears of my blood.
He got me in the mouth last round, though I managed to escape his headlock for reasons that still make no sense.
Unless, of course, he wanted me to escape.
“Come on,” I grit, pressing my forearm into his windpipe. Pinning his groin with my knee. “Fucking fight me, Zolkan.”
The Zortaire roars, snapping his fangs. I know this position is painful—and once again, I have the upper hand. But he isn’t trying to regain it now.
If I’m going to win, though, it’s going to be a fair match. I bare my own teeth, spitting the most enraging truths I can think of.
“You’re fucking pathetic. Have been since the day I showed up with your omega. You know, when I snuck into her room and rubbed my cocks all over her cunt?”
He growls, straining, but he isn’t even trying to break my wings. “She needed tending,” he snarls.
“And you could not do it?” I press my weight down harder. Choking him. “TELL ME WHY, DAMN YOU.”
Zolkan wheezes, his features creasing in pain. I’m suddenly manic with the need to hear him admit the truth. It’s the reason I set this challenge forth—to draw the words from him, by any means necessary.
I rear up just long enough to slam my fist into his cheek, then drop back to his throat, sinking my claws in and shaking him roughly. “Tell me why.”
Zolkan turns his head and spits into the dirt, leaving a gob of blue-black blood and saliva. “I don’t know what you’re—”
This fucker.
The rage of a thousand restless nights and painful days floods my veins. Missing my brothers, both the living and the dead. It fills my voice, strengthening my ruff.
“TELL ME!”
Zolkan roars. The deafening sound echoes through the tent. So loud, I barely hear the wheeze that follows. “Because she’s my mate.”
Fuck.
I didn’t expect the phantom stabs piercing my hearts. Winded, I drop his neck and roll to one side, collapsing onto the packed earth. Panting to fill my aching lungs.
She’s his mate.
Not mine.
I already knew that. So why does hearing him confirm it shatter me?
Silence stretches over us, punctuated by our labored breathing. When he clears his shredded throat, I can tell I’ve done some damage.
Cylus will be pissed, I think, wondering if the grumpy blue male followed us here or stayed with Sofi. If I had to guess, based on the way he was watching her and how he smelled…
I’m not sure why the thought comforts me instead of inspiring another rage. Either way, I rasp my new favorite order, quieter this time. “Tell me.”
Zolkan does not move. He stares at the indigo tent above us. “I knew the day you brought her here, the instant I stepped into the palace,” he answers, hoarse. “I ran to her.”
I remember. “And scared her.”
“And I scared her, yes,” he goes on, shame darkening his musk. “That was one of the worst moments of my life. I’m grateful for it, now, though. It forced me to pause long enough to really look at her. Listen to her.”
See?
Honorable horn-head.
I hate him for it almost as much as I admire him. A mate is all either of us has ever wanted—I’m not sure I could have reacted the way he did when he backed off to spare her his needs.
Pain slices deeper into my chest. Of course Stelaris knew better; she would never give Sofi to a male like me. Look what I did the first second I had an opportunity to be alone with her.
Zolkan senses the shift in my scent. His face turns toward me, and he exhales, the sound ragged.
“She never wanted to stay on Khanos, Rask. Let alone be its queen. I knew if I told you—or anyone—she would never be allowed to leave my side. And I knew if I let myself fuck her, I would end up breeding her. Or biting her. Or both… She did not want me. I’m still not sure she would, given the chance. ”
The thought of her leaving fills me with an odd mix of white-hot desperation and chilling dread. I turn his words over, glancing into his violet stare.
“What’s changed, now? Why did you tell me?”
He didn’t have to. He could have won. Killed me or maimed me, or simply died with his lips sealed.
Zolkan sighs again. “Because you issued this challenge for her. To defend her honor as my mate. Which is how I know you care for her nearly as much as I do. I believe you will protect her the same way I have.”
Sacrificing everything. Our planet, his happiness. Even his life.
The words sink to my center, settling much too comfortably.
Morfu’s hairy ass.
He’s right.
I came to this ring understanding there was a very real possibility of losing. If I had… I would have died for her.
And I’d do it again.
Worse? I’m pretty sure I would also live for her, if I was allowed.
My spinning head falls to the dirt. “We are so fucked.”
For a moment, I think the Zortaire’s throat might be collapsing. He hisses out a breath, choking and wheezing. It takes me a moment too long to realize—he’s laughing.
Hells, when was the last time I heard Zolkan laugh?
I can’t remember, but the once-familiar sight has me smirking, too. “Shut up. This is all your fucking fault,” I snort.
Zolkan only chuckles more. “You chose her.” Something sobers him, forcing his gaze back to mine. “I never did thank you for that, by the way.”
My shoulders drop, pinning my wings to the ground. The last of my fight drains onto the dusty floor. “You’re welcome,” I grumble. “Though I could have just as easily been trying to kill you.”
Zolkan’s lips quirk up. He shrugs. “I’m grateful either way.”
The snap of a tent flap opening has both of us bolting upright. My sister stands at the entrance, her scent marred by fear and anger. A guilty wince crosses my face, and I find a matching look on Zolkan’s.
“If you two are done being idiots,” she spits, focusing on her outrage, “your omega needs you.”