Chapter Nineteen #2
I’m so damn cold. These hospital rooms are always colder than they need to be.
Even in the winter when the heat is on, they’re still so cold.
If I weren’t so scared, I would have grabbed a hoodie and a pair of pants to put on.
Instead, I’m wearing a pair of shorts and one of Kreed’s tee-shirts I stole from him years ago.
I was just cleaning and looking for a job so I didn’t really pay attention to what I was wearing when I checked on Rory and tried to get her fever to come down with medicine at home.
Maybe Sam thought to grab a change of clothes for me.
“Thank you, Caleb. You’re always here when I truly need you,” I tell him, knowing the words will never be enough for everything he’s done for me over the years.
“Cali, I know shit is strained between the two of us right now. Don’t ever let that make you avoid me when you need me in this kind of situation.
Not just when it involves the kids, but if you need me for any reason, call me.
Come get me in the clubhouse or wherever I am.
I will always be there for you and the kids, Cali.
What were you thinkin’ about before you pushed off my chest?
” Caleb asks me, his voice still a whisper as Rory sleeps directly in front of us.
“Well, um, I was just remembering the first and only time I was in your arms other than for a hug,” I tell him honestly because Caleb always knows when I’m not disclosing the full truth to him.
Caleb is quiet for a few minutes. I feel his body shift in the uncomfortable chair as he turns to look at me.
“The homecoming dance our freshman year when I danced with you. I was the only one to dance with you that night,” he says, longing in his voice as I look at him.
“Yeah. The same night you won homecoming king for the first time. I haven’t thought about that night in such a long time.
It was one of the best nights of my life.
You made it special from buyin’ that gorgeous dress and shoes to sending me to be pampered for the day.
It’s the only day I’ve ever had something like that,” I say, realizing how little Darren actually did for me over the years we shared our life together.
When he was home, everything was about him and what I had to do to make his life easier.
Not that anything I ever did was right. He never once thought about everything I did as a single parent while he was deployed.
Not only was I a single parent, but I was either going to school full time or working full time once I graduated.
Yes, I know nothing I did compared to him putting his life on the line every second of every day he was deployed.
It’s just upsetting to know he never wanted to spend time alone with me on a date or something when he was home.
“Hey, what’s got that look on your face, Reina?” Caleb questions me as a knock sounds on the door.
Releasing a shaky breath, I look over as Sam and Maddie enter the hospital room with their arms loaded down with bags.
“We got all kinds of goodies for the two of you. How’s our little angel doing today?” Sam asks, walking up to us and handing everything over to Caleb while Maddie hands me a coffee.
“Her fever finally broke in the middle of the night. They’re givin’ her IV medicine every six hours and she’s startin’ to get some of her color back.
She only woke up once but she was alert and looked over at me.
Rory wasn’t awake for very long, but Doc said she’ll be awake for longer periods as the medicine starts to work and she feels better,” Caleb answers his mom as he hands me a breakfast sandwich that I place in my lap.
“That’s good news. Did either of you manage to get any sleep?” Maddie asks, looking between the two of us with a smile on her face.
“I got some. I’m not sure how long I was asleep though. How’s Bryce doing?” I return, needing to know what’s going on with my son since I don’t know when I’ll see him.
“Bryce is worried about his sister but understands what’s going on. Kreed and Playboy have been keeping him occupied and busy so he doesn’t have time to really worry about his sister,” Sam answers me and I wonder how much he really understands about the situation.
“They’re gonna bring him over in a little while to see Rory and you.
He wants to see Caleb too. Tiffany is still going to the house to hang out with him in case Kreed and Playboy get called away for some reason.
Especially with Rory in the hospital and no one knowing what’s wrong with her.
Kreed is going out of his mind with worry for his little princess,” Sam says, and I already know Kreed would be worried about her.
I’m sure he’s messaged or called Caleb more than once to check on her since I called.
“I got you both a few changes of clothes. Cali, I know you have to be freezing to death.”
“I am. Thank you. I’ll change before I do anything else.
I’ll be right back,” I say, getting up and scooting past Caleb so I can go to the bathroom in the room Rory’s in.
I grab a pair of sweatpants and one of Caleb’s hoodies that were packed for me.
I’ll be warm and comfortable while in the hospital.
After changing, I go back in to sit across from Caleb instead of right next to him.
I heard his words that night and know he doesn’t want to be with me.
By sitting next to him and falling asleep on his body, I’m doing nothing but confusing myself and allowing myself to think about all the possibilities between us.
That’s the last thing I need to have on my mind when my daughter is sick.
Yes, it would be nice to have my partner at my side during this time.
Maybe it’s time for me to think about dating.
I’m sure there are nice guys out there who wouldn’t mind dating a single mom.
It just might take some time to find one.
Especially when no one will ever compare to Caleb in my mind.
Plus, he’d have to be good enough to get through Caleb, Kreed, and all the other men in my life.