36. Willow
36
WILLOW
It's not the first time I've made the walk down the street to the front gates of the Outlaw Sons MC clubhouse.
It's the first time I've done it with enough explosives wired to me to blow up the whole block, though.
My steps are small. Slow. Careful. I have no idea how sensitive these things are. Tanner said nothing would happen until he triggered them, but he’s unhinged. I can’t trust him.
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
OH MY GOD!
I'm a walking bomb.
I can't hold back the tears. They stream down my cheeks as I walk. If a miracle doesn't happen, my last walk.
Maybe I should’ve been braver? Told him no and let him kill me. At least then it would’ve just been me. Like this, many people die, and I'm still one of them. I can't even claim I'm being selfish by getting out of it. No matter what, I die.
I stop, my gut heaving and tears blurring my vision. How did it ever come to this?
“Keep walking, Willow.” Tanner's voice is like poison in my ear.
My limbs are free and there's no tape over my mouth, but I've never been more trapped. I can’t take the bomb vest off, because according to Tanner, if any of those wires are pulled out, the rest of the bombs will go off. The ear piece he's made me wear isn't trapped the same way, but if he notices me not following his directions, he's going to trigger the bombs from his detonator. And the receiver on my belt is rigged like the bombs. Tug out a wire, and the rest goes.
I'm walking like a robot, terrified I'm going to accidentally catch on one of the wires and tug it loose by accident.
Up ahead, the gate to the Outlaw Sons' clubhouse is open. I can name the guards who are watching me approach, looking curious. Riot and Lash. God, Riot is one of Jessica's men. If it's my fault that she loses someone she loves after the talk we had… I want to puke.
Oh Jesus.
And Lash, the man with the magic tongue. Ocean's going to be so disappointed.
That I can even think about that right now just shows how scrambled my brain is.
Riot spots me first. “Willow! Fuck, we got people all over looking for you. You okay? Need a hand?” Something about the way he says it is off. Cautious. And he doesn’t make any move to come closer. Do they know something?
“Just ignore them and keep walking,” Tanner instructs me.
“No!” I blurt out, holding my hand up. Suspicious? Just a little. Tanner told me to get inside without arousing suspicion, but I'd like to see him make this walk strapped to a bomb. “I'm… I'm fine.” I force the fakest smile that ever faked and hope he buys it. It's normal for girls to smile through a faceful of tears, right?
Lash’s face hardens, but he doesn’t say anything. Just follows me carefully with his eyes. Now I’m sure there’s something going on. But do they really know?
I want to yell at him to run. For them to grab everyone they can get hold of and run as far away from me as possible, but Tanner is monitoring from a distance. He can hear everything I say. And what if Riot and Lash do the exact opposite and try to help? If they don’t know, then I’m just making it more likely to kill them when I die.
Every step is an equation. At what point is my chance at a miracle outweighed by the lives that might be lost?
So, step by horrible step, I approach my doom. And theirs.
“Willow,” Riot says again as I get close. He can see my tears. I know it. He takes a step towards me.
“Don't!” I hiss. I can't let him. If he stays a little bit away, maybe he won't be quite ground zero, and maybe he won't die, and maybe Jessica won't hate the memory of me for the rest of her life.
He holds back, but it's obvious he doesn't want to. When Lash starts to move, he holds him back too and shakes his head subtly. Maybe he understands something is going on. Maybe he'll manage to evacuate people without it being obvious.
“All the way up the steps to the church. This is your big moment, Willow.” Tanner starts to hum ‘Here comes the bride’ and I want to scratch his voice right out of my brain.
My ears perk up at the rumble of motorcycles coming closer. My heart leaps at the idea of it being my guys, coming to save me like knights on their mighty steeds come to save their princess. At least I’d get to see them one more time.
Then I realize that it's dumb.
What are they going to do? Die with me? I hope it’s not them after all.
The rumble comes closer as I step, little by little, closer to the church steps. How far will I get?
A seagull calls. It could be the last one I hear. I try not to break down right in the middle of the stairs.
The doors open and Poe appears, holding some kind of box with an antenna. I don't know what he's up to. All I know is that now I'm going to end up on Paige's hate list too, and I just can't do this anymore.
There’s no one directly next to me. Maybe I can get away with just maiming a few. If I don’t give Tanner much warning, it’ll take him at least a second or two to notice, right? Time to turn and start running.
I close my eyes, prepare to meet my maker, then yell as loud as I can, “Run! There’s a bomb! Run!” Then I fall to my knees and dry heave on the ground.
“Oh Willow, you naughty girl—” Tanner’s voice is cut off, but still I wait.
And wait.
And wait a little longer.
I open my eyes. Poe is right in front of me now, looking too young and pretty to die because of me. The box in his hand is making one heck of a racket, buzzing and crackling like a live wire hit by lightning.
“I think it worked,” he says. “It fucking worked. We're gonna get you out of that, Willow. Just waiting for Skyhigh.”
“What? No, Poe. You need to get away before the bomb explodes.”
“No fucking way.” He shakes his head, looking nervous but determined. “Been working on an RF jammer for a while, but this is the first real test.”
“A what?”
“It fucks with radio signals, which is probably what Tanner's using to remote detonate the bombs. The plan was to mess with police radios, but this is even better.” He smiles encouragingly.
“How did you know? Before right now, I mean?” My heart's thundering, my adrenaline is spiking, but somewhere in the back of my mind, my brain is screaming that maybe it’s not all over after all.
“Skyhigh called ahead. They should be here any minute.”
I don't understand, but I don't need to. All I know is that Poe managed to hit the pause button on my certain doom.
The rumble gets louder, echoing off the city blocks, and then tires squeal as four motorcycles turn hard and peel into the courtyard. Gravel sings as they skid to a stop, and then they're by my side. Skyhigh, Dragon and Blackout. The fourth guy runs off to the side, whoever he is. I only care about them.
“No.” I shake my head. “You can't be here. I might still explode. It’s better to clear everyone out, okay? I wasn’t… I wasn’t brave enough to stop before, but I am now. It’s okay.”
“No it fucking isn’t. You’re going to be fine, baby,” Skyhigh says with a grin like he does this every day. “Just stand up niiiice and slow, and stay real still.”
He carefully, so carefully, one button at time, opens my jacket and reveals the explosives underneath.
Poe whistles. “Holy shit.” Suddenly, he looks a little nervous about his jammer. And maybe he's right to be. Maybe it's not working and Tanner is just waiting to get as many people close as possible.
“Leave it here,” Skyhigh tells Poe.
“Yeah, it's on.” He puts it down on the ground next to us.
“Good. Now everyone else, back the fuck up. This is a party for two, you got that? Just me and Willow, no one else.” When no one moves, he yells, “Now, for fuck's sake!”
After a moment, Poe backs up quickly. Riot and Lash take cover behind the church while Poe goes inside. I swear there were other people here too, but they must've run. Only Skyhigh, Blackout and Dragon left, and they're all I need.
“Weren't you fuckers listening? I said to back the fuck up.” Skyhigh glares at his best friends while he pulls out his knife.
“Fuck you.” Dragon crouches next to me. “I'm not fucking leaving. So you better fucking get this right so you don't take out all three of us.”
“All four of us.” Blackout corrects as he takes my hand and squeezes it. “You think we're gonna leave either Willow or you? We know you can do this.”
“You fucking idiots,” Skyhigh growls under his breath.
They're here. They're all here, and… and they think they're going to save me? Maybe there really are miracles.
It's what we're going to need.
“Okay, Willow, stay with me. You gotta stand real still, okay?”
I nod. “Okay.” My voice feels so small.
Skyhigh traces each wire with his finger, just barely not touching, his nimble mind figuring out how everything is connected as quickly as possible. I'm shivering like a leaf, but do my best not to make it harder for him.
Pretty sure there are no second chances if he gets it wrong.