Chapter 39
Despite the overall air of chaos in the house, everything was going to plan.
Well, maybe not exactly. The probability that of all of the members of our pack, Marcus would be the one to sink his teeth into our omega first was catastrophically low.
But any negative feelings I had about it were easily brushed away.
Jealousy was the sort of painfully nonsensical thing that I didn't have a lot of patience for.
A foolish, resentment-driven emotion reserved for alphas who lacked the common sense to go after what they want regardless of the consequences.
Unfortunately, many alphas didn't see things my way.
When you bonded an omega as far as the order of operations was concerned, it really didn't matter.
At least not biologically. A bond was a bond, and the body didn't keep a score based on who'd marked their chosen mate first…
If it did, maybe I wouldn't have been so lax about Joon's detached reluctance to join us.
Maybe I would've ensured that it was me who laid claim to our sweet little omega first.
But it didn't matter. When I claimed Joon for myself—and trust that I would, he belonged to me from the moment I'd laid eyes on him, almost as certainly as I knew Eva was the same—it would be because the omega was begging for it. There was no point in a prize that didn't want to be won.
I'd spent enough of my life chasing meaningless sex with omegas that were available for a quick heat fuck and nothing else. It was a luxury to explore more.
And there was still plenty of time before the baby came.
Surely Joon would be ready before then. And, if he wasn't…
Well, he'd already bitten Marcus. Surely I was high on the list of alphas that he wanted to sink his teeth into…
Though I didn't need to be a mathematical genius to know that the honor of most highly anticipated surely went to Indigo.
The trouble was, my packmate didn't see things the way I did. For them, jealousy and resentment were as near and dear as a love language. I tried to understand, but in truth… It seemed pointless.
But so would yet another argument about alphaing up and biting the damned brat already.
Luckily for Indigo, I was a good friend, and I knew exactly what they needed.
The stench of burned sugar made my nose itch as I passed their room, the pound of their fingers against the keyboard making me wonder if they'd successfully pounded their switches into dust.
Their dark mood was foolish pride at best, and deeply disrespectful to the relationships of his packmates at worst. And I wouldn't stand for it. I needed to put a stop to their foul mood before it could wind Joon up anymore. Or worse, Marcus.
He already felt an astonishing amount of misplaced guilt over our last failed attempt at securing an omega for our pack. But I could hardly count the fickle emotions of an omega against Marcus, his staunch optimism subdued in the wake of the snafu Mindy had left behind.
I didn't anticipate that he'd want to explore the possibility of a bond again—and, I thought with a wry smile as I paused outside of Indigo's door, breathing through my mouth to minimize the sickly feeling festering in my gut at their scent, colored by negative emotions.
I suppose Marcus hadn't; Joon made the decision for them.
Usually, I'd be furious that my careful calculations had been so off, but given the end result was directly in line with my optimal output, I'd decided that it was moot to fuss over it.
In contrast, Indigo was thinking about this entirely wrong. Too busy focusing on petty feelings of ownership to see what was really going on here—our pack had found its omega.
Permanently.
And yet, there they were sulking that it hadn't been their teeth that'd sealed the deal.
Could've been, though. If they weren't afraid to take what they wanted.
If they weren't so damn fucking careful.
That's what tonight was about, though. As much as I wanted to lift Indigo's mood and resolve some of the tension, making the house feel as inhospitable as a desert in the dry season, it was also about teaching Indi an important lesson.
Take what you want.
Fuck the consequences.
I knocked at the alpha's door, earning a grunted "What?" in response that didn't meet the social criteria for being invited inside. But, unlike the vampire protagonists in 18th century novels, I didn't need to be welcomed to find myself where I wanted to be.
A simple fact that'd proved to be one of the greatest joys in my life so far. All doors were an invitation to open them, so long as one knew how to bypass the lock.
Using my shoulder to open the door a little wider, I was further assaulted with the stench of Indigo's displeasure.
It was easy to see why Joon and Marcus had decided to go out for the afternoon.
Though I imagined that had about as much to do with their desire to get to know each other better now that they were permanently tied as it was to get away from the alpha's dire mood.
Would you need to get to know each other heaps once the bond was formed?
That felt like the kind of thing that felt moot after you had a direct path to their every emotion.
But perhaps there was more lurking under Joon's skin than I anticipated.
A difficult concept to marry with my two-dimensional view of the bratty omega.
"You're being a bit childish, don't you think?
" I asked, leaning in the doorframe with my arms crossed.
"I thought you'd be happy that Joon finally decided to stop being difficult.
Or, maybe, are you jealous that Marcus is taking a turn with your toy?
There will be plenty of time for you to play with him later, you know? "
"Don't talk about him like that," Indi snapped, not bothering to look up from their computer monitor as their health steadily trickled towards zero, the screen coated in red warning that their character was about to pass out.
"He's not a possession that can be owned or whatever weirdo dehumanizing bullshit you're trying to get at. "
"If that's the case, shouldn't it be something to celebrate that he's decided to join our family? Why are you having such a difficult time respecting his decision with Marcus?"
"Because Joon is mine," Indigo growled, their jaw wound so tightly I worried that their teeth would transform into finely ground dust.
Micro fissures, or craze-lines, as some dentists liked to refer to them as—
Because I could get caught in the information spiral about the likelihood of hairline cracks in Indigo's enamel, or their relatively benign nature, I looked around the room to distract myself, breathing in slowly through my nose.
However manageable I found my condition to be, it was often the most prominent and inconvenient when I was dealing with stressful situations. Like my pack mates' emotions.
I studied the glass tank on the far side of Indi's room, next to the window. The rosy abomination was resting its unevenly coiled body over the dessicated log that ran the length of its enclosure, the mix of the cool and warm light provided by the window and bulb making Potato's scales glisten.
"And yet," I said slowly, letting out a breath through my mouth as the urge to lecture my packmate about his oral hygiene loosened. "You say Joon isn't a possession. So which is it?"
"Pedantic cunt."
"My question is sincere."
"I don't expect you to get it, you don't give a fuck about anything enough to want it outside of carefully laid contracts and rules."
The barb was meant to wound, but Indigo had a point.
It suited me fine to know where I stood in my relationships.
And if that meant that I was a touch unromantic in the way I pursued them, a little removed…
So be it. The agreed boundaries of my relationships with both omegas had offered me more than enough freedom to experiment, and even surprise—the memory of Eva's scream as I reached for her between fabrics dyed more shades of pink than I knew existed nearly drew a smile to my face.
But, there was more to romance than surprise. And the longer I spent with each of them, the more I'd had to consider their needs as well.
A truly horrifying thought, considering the entirely illogical amount that Eva spent crying over nothing.
Still, as different as the two were, I'd noticed one unifying desire between Eva and Joon—Transparency.
"Why not share your—"
"If you're going to tell me to tell Joon my feelings, I already fucking did. But it doesn't matter; there's no going back. What's done is done. I just—I thought that—I was under the impression that—"
"It would be you?" I finished, tiring a little of the pussy footing around the issue. The continuous start and stop of unfinished sentences adds to Indigo's displeased scent to give me a headache.
This was the thing with them: they were too sensitive.
In my experience, letting something as frivolous as other people's feelings get in the way of what they really wanted never ended in the results you desired.
And worse, Indigo didn't just worry about the negative emotions; they spent time on the positive ones as well—a hideously foolish endeavor that wasted their time and pulled them further away from their goals.
If they could just think of themselves—Want something and take it without considering how it would impact the people around them—their life would be much easier.
Surely, at the very least, it would be more fulfilling than waiting around hoping that their desires would align perfectly with someone else's.
Or worse, maybe they just accepted whatever it was that our toys wanted.
The idea was harrowing. Joon thought that an appropriate breakfast consisted of half a pint of ice cream before he moved in with us. If he couldn't be trusted with basic nutrition, how could he be trusted with anyone else's desires?
He could barely handle his own.
"Shut up, Cam. I'm not in the fucking mood.
" Indigo snapped, slamming their mouse down as the 'you lose' text flashed on the screen in blood.
"For fuck sakes! You don't get it, okay?
I thought that there was something between Joon and me and now it's like it never fucking mattered?
He wanted an alpha, just not me to be his alpha.
So what does that mean? Marcus just gets to be his mate now?
And I'm, what, exactly? The guy whose bed he sleeps in?
Is he even going to do that anymore? It's fucking bullshit! "
A took a couple of steps further into the room, but stopped at the same moment that Indigo did, the little "going live" alert bannering across their screen from Eva giving me an idea.
"I know how to make you feel better," I said with a grin, slinging my arms around the back of Indi's chair to wrap around their front, taking the mouse to bring up Eva's stream starting soon screen. "Let's go play with our fucktoy."
"Cameo—"
I took the alpha's chin in hand, turning their eyes towards the neatly lined dolls on the small shelf above their monitors, lifeless and unmoving with no one holding their strings. "Take back your control, Indigo. You're an alpha. Act like it."
The name of Eva's stream changed to STALKED BY KILLERS??? and Indigo hummed, it was like watching an artist at work, the gears in the alpha's mind kicking into action as they flicked between the puppets and Eva's photo… before landing on the pair of masks hanging on the wall beside his door.
"She wants to be stalked by killers, huh?" Indigo said slowly, excitement coiling in me like a viper.
"I can get into her apartment," I whispered against the alpha's ear, hot breath making him shiver. "You can take and take and take. Finally get a little back for everything you give, Indigo."
"Let's go play with our doll."