Chapter 1
CHAPTER 1
CHANCE
Before
Dim lights made the room appear seedier than it actually was. The owner likely kept it that way because he only wanted a certain clientele inside these walls.
A clientele that I surely didn’t fit.
My Ivy League education and stupid expensive suit were a dead giveaway to the privileges I’ve had in this life. Granted, the education part didn’t often get clocked at first glance. I could sometimes sneak into a place and hide casually for a while before anyone noticed.
And I always chose places like this one. Where no one who knew me would go looking.
I needed some time away.
Some time out of the goddamn spotlight of my life.
My parents had me to fulfil the image of an ideal family. From the minute I was able to walk, they had me posing and smiling at every function imaginable. It’s been a series of rotating events for years, with barely enough time for my education in between.
Most would think it’s the other way around. That wasn’t the case when your father was a senator. In fact, the man would have been president if not for the heart attack he had last year. I was twenty-five at the time, and the idea of losing him was troublesome.
Not because I loved him so much I’d feel lost without him. It was more that the reins on my life would be broken, and I had no clue what to do about it.
Who was I when my entire life wasn’t managed by other people? When everything I did wasn’t public scrutiny or a top news headline.
“You look lost, handsome,” a teasing voice called from beside me where I sat at the bar.
Normally, I’d have been tucked away in a corner by now. But I couldn’t bring myself to hide just yet. There was too much on my mind to give into the darkness this early.
I grunted at the other guy to avoid speaking. He’d clock that I wasn’t a regular here if I did, though he might have already.
“Don’t give me the silent treatment. I’m curious about you. Something in your frown tells me you’ve got a good story or two inside you. I love stories.”
His eagerness was amusing. I wanted to look him in the eye and spill everything. I also wanted him to leave me the fuck alone so I could sip on the single beer I ordered in peace. I’d barely touched it, not wanting to fall into the habit of getting drunk off my ass when life got hard. If that were the case, then I’d rarely be sober.
When the guy didn’t leave right away, I turned to face him. He clearly wanted something, though I wasn’t sure what. Hopefully, I could assuage his curiosity so he’d leave.
Except I turned.
And he was there.
And — oh, god. No! Not this again.
I’d worked hard to push down those types of feelings over the years. My family wasn’t exactly conservative in their views, however, there was an understanding that certain behaviors weren’t meant for the public to know.
Like my father’s affairs.
Or my mother’s chain smoking.
My weakness? Men. Gorgeous, strong, take-charge men who would treat me like their plaything. And maybe occasionally they’d become mine.
I’d never found someone to do both in the short time I lived out my fantasy. There’d been too much at risk, and far too much paperwork with the level of NDAs they needed to sign. It wasn’t worth my energy.
So I gave up.
I decided my hand would do until I reached a point in life when I could slip out of the spotlight enough to be happy. Only then did I get my true happy ending.
But this man was going to make me break every fucking rule I’d set for myself. I knew it with the easy smirk he wore and the teasing glint in his eyes.
He was trouble.
“I’m Tank,” he said. “You are?”
“Chance.”
His grin widened. “What are the chances, huh, Chance?”
I rolled my eyes. It was a joke I’d heard in some variation or another over the years. My parents had been foolish enough to name me something that wound up being tossed around in metaphors and headlines like crazy.
Hell, it could have been intentional on their part. Name the baby in a way that keeps his name in their daily repertoire. Yeah, that’s definitely a Sheppard family idea.
“They’re very slim, actually,” I told him with finality. “I’ve never been here before and likely won’t again.”
Tank hummed. “A one and done kind of guy. I’m a fan of that idea.”
The way he drawled out each word sent a chill down my spine. We both knew he wasn’t talking about how I frequented bars.
“What about you? Is this your favorite local hideout?”
I don’t know where the question came from. It wasn’t as if I intended to come back. Especially not to find him or anything. Because that would be foolish. So far beyond foolish it would turn reckless if actually carried out.
He shrugged, then leaned closer. “Why you asking, handsome? Want to see me again already? What about that one and done rule?”
“You have a lot of questions.”
“It’s a work hazard.”
I froze, my mind immediately thinking he was a journalist of some kind. Figures the first man I’ve allowed myself to halfway flirt with in nearly four years was only looking for a story.
“I’m a private detective,” he added when I didn’t question further.
My shoulders dropped slightly, though not all the way. If he was a detective of some kind, especially a private one, then he might still be after a story about me. I couldn’t let my guard down.
That last thought pissed me off enough to have me straightening on my stool and facing him all the way. “Who sent you?”
At my demand, his brows shot up. “Sent me?”
“Yeah. Was it someone running against my father? Or do you liaison with news teams too? Maybe it’s for a person I don’t even fucking know who wants a story to sell.”
His face transformed from confused to worried in a heartbeat. With slow movements, he raised his hands and lifted his shirt. Then he emptied his pockets onto the counter.
“Listen, handsome, I don’t know who you are. Yeah, I work in the private sector, but mostly to catch cheating spouses and do insurance claims. Occasionally, I do a bit of muscle for hire work, which is honestly my favorite bit. I’m not whoever you think I am.”
I sighed, then scrubbed my face. “Sorry. It’s a hazard of the family name.”
He started to put his stuff away, nodding along as if it made sense. Once he had it all tucked away, he stepped even closer. The move made us touch in a way that could only be seen as intimate. Anyone else in the bar would see us and know there was more here. Know that a single shift could have us pawing at each other, desperate for a second of privacy.
I felt the heat of the idea sweep through me. Fuck! It had been too long since I’d had someone on their knees for me.
Would this big, strong man drop down to the floor to suck my cock if I asked? Or would he demand I do the same?
His fingers running down the front of my buttoned-up shirt drew my attention back to him. I pushed away the fantasy to soak up whatever reality he was giving me.
“I have no clue who your family is. None of that matters to me. All I care about is how hard you like to fuck. I’m verse, so I can top or bottom. And I have a place nearby we can use. I’ll sign any NDA you need me to. You won’t hear a peep out of me about this ever again after tonight.”
Fire roared in my veins at the offer.
He understood.
He really did get it. The need for privacy and the urge to play both sides of the coin. To give and to take, to be all of what someone needed and wanted.
I never held it against anyone who preferred strict roles. It just wasn’t for me. Some days I needed to rough someone else up. I wanted to hold them down, fucking them until they pleaded for me to fill them with my cum.
Other times, I needed to be pumped full. I needed a cock to split me open, reminding me I was just a normal man in need of being told what to do. I wasn’t some form of political royalty in waiting for his chance to rule. I was a horny man getting his prostate worked over by some really good dick.
Considering his offer for a half second, I decided to let myself have this one thing. I never stepped out of line. I’d spent my life following the demands of others. Their rules and ideas. My degree and my current career weren’t even things I wanted to do. It was all decided over an afternoon meeting between my parents and their team of advisors when I was around six. I wasn’t even in on the conversation, not that I’d have had much say anyway.
“How close is this place?” I asked him, decision made.
He threw some bills on the counter, then stood and extended his hand. “Come on, handsome. It’s within walking distance.”
I nearly winced at the notion. This wasn’t the best area of town. Didn’t mean his place was going to be horrible though. Beautiful things could grow from destruction. I’d seen it myself.
We rushed from the bar hand in hand. I didn’t stop to think about anyone seeing us or even the possibility of a photo being taken. I’d deal with the consequences later.
Tank was offering me a bit of freedom. I had to grab hold. This ride, wherever it took me, was going to be worth it. I knew it.