Chapter 18
Chapter Eighteen
ROME
Instrumental music plays through my AirPods. I close my eyes with the thought that the alarm on my phone is ticking too quickly.
The race is about to start, and my head is fucking spinning.
Why did I pick a fight with Vinny?
Is this what it’s like to self-sabotage?
I have my father scowling at me, with my old team backing him every step of the way, and now I have two racers who want to eat me alive on the track.
Vinny and my stepbrother.
I mean, I love a good competition, but I’m all over the place, even if on the outside I appear as confident as I always do. The truth of the matter is, my life has been turned upside down, and I don’t know how to handle it.
Some will say it was my choice to leave Pierce Racing, but was it?
I exhale and pinch the bridge of my nose. The piano in my ears is background noise to my winding thoughts. My pulse is sky-high, and I can only pray that when I’m seated in my car, the familiarity will calm me enough to focus.
I open my eyes, and a breath catches in my lungs.
Tessa stands inches in front of me with her long, brown hair flowing out from underneath her Vanstone hat. She peers at me like she has something to say.
I lazily skim her body, hesitating on the hem of her skirt. It hits mid-thigh, and I’m instantly reminded of the way her leg felt beneath my palm. Sweat prickles the back of my neck, a rough swallow moving down my throat.
Fuck me. I need to get laid.
Anger zips to my fingertips.
I pull my earbud out and fling a glare at her.
I’m not sure if I’m pissed because she’s in here while I’m trying to get in the zone, or if it’s because she was able to cut through my messy thoughts and center them all around her.
“Out.” It’s a single word, but my tone packs a punch.
Tessa crosses her arms. “You have two minutes to get out there and onto your spot for the national anthem or you get fined,” she scoffs. “Which means Vanstone gets fined.”
My eyebrows draw together in annoyance. “You’re my engineer, not my handler.”
I stand from the couch and shake myself into the rest of my race suit. I zip it up and brush past her, bumping into her shoulder for good measure.
Her sharp gasp cuts through the tiny room.
“I’m not your handler?” she questions from behind, her tone full of sarcasm. “If I didn’t have Gia intervene when you were talking to Vinny, what would’ve happened?”
I head toward the other racers with Tessa hot on my heels.
“You seem awfully protective of him,” I say.
“And you seem awfully jealous.”
My steps falter.
Me? Jealous?
I don’t get jealous, and especially not where it concerns her.
I’m too close to my opponents to say anything else, so I keep my mouth shut. I walk over and stand beside her brother, who doesn’t even look in my direction.
He’s clearly focused. Unlike me.
I don’t note a single verse of the national anthem or notice the cameras zooming in on my face. My heartbeat drums inside my ears instead, even as I pull my helmet on and get seated in my car.
It isn’t until her voice filters through, wrapping around my head like a relentless weed, that I can hear again.
“Radio check. Can you hear me?” she asks.
I clench my jaw. “Unfortunately.”
She scoffs, and I chuckle inside my head.
I wiggle my fingers.
In and out.
In and out.
In and out.
I keep them outstretched when I realize my stretches are mimicking her breathing through my helmet.
“Stop breathing so hard.”
She growls. “You are unbelievable.”
My lip twitches. “I’ve heard that many times, especially in the bedroom.”
Her loud, exasperated sigh derails my nerves. But only for a second.
“Take off the way we did in practice,” she reminds me.
I remain silent.
5…4…3…2…1.
Breathe.
By turn one, I’m already down two positions.
I’m tense, my body tight, and I know Tessa is holding her tongue on my shit take-off, but I would almost rather her say something instead of the deafening silence.
“Car to the left and right. Hold your line.”
“Which cars?” I ask.
“Doesn’t matter. Focus.”
My jaw locks.
Two cars touch, and carbon fiber scatters in the front line.
“Fuck,” I curse.
Someone locks up, and I’m forced off the racing line. I avoid the spin and cut a curb, still managing to get back on track despite the minimal space.
I lose a spot, which pisses me off.
“Whoever the fuck that was just pushed me off. There was no space.”
Tessa’s voice, calm and steady fills my helmet. “Stay focused.”
“It’s a little hard when some drivers are purposefully pissing me off.” I laser my vision in front.
I’m able to maintain my spot, but I'm on edge, especially when I see a blur of green from Vinny’s car.
“Who was it?” I know she’ll catch my drift.
Tessa’s voice is the only one I hear. “Focus, Rome.”
“Was it him?”
There’s a pause, and then sure enough, I hear Tessa’s sigh. “Copy.”
Fucking asshole.
Of course Tessa would understand who I’m asking about.
“Your little boyfriend is about to lose his position.”
“Call him my boyfriend again and you’ll regret it,” she stresses. “And pay attention! He’s driving aggressively in the gray.”
The corner is up next, and those are second nature to me. I do what I need to do, and yet, someone runs me wide, squeezing me toward the grass.
Vinny swerves late, and I’m hopeful a penalty appears.
“I swear to God,” I grit.
“I see it, Rome.”
Why does it calm me when she says my name like that? Like a breath floating effortlessly from her mouth, almost as if she’s giving in to me.
Vinny does it again, and I curse for the third time since the race started.
“Dangerous,” I mutter to myself.
Things are dangerous on and off the track at this point.
After pitting, Tessa comes back on the radio. “Be vigilant. He’s behind you now.”
Good. He’s right where he belongs.
“Where are the others?"
“Not your concern,” Tess says.
I grumble, but she’s right.
I want nothing more than to race better than Beau, but he isn’t going to race dirty or try anything with the recent drama involving our teams. It’d be too obvious—and too derailing.
“You’re doing well,” she says.
“Not well enough.”
“You’re welcome for the compliment.”
“And you’re welcome for making you look good on the job, Princess.”
I’m positive she rolls her eyes.
“Lots of chatter on the radio,” she adds. “He’s angry, and he’s coming for you around those corners. Stay focused. Don’t let me down now.”
Never.
“Then keep talking,” I order.
There’s silence.
“Don’t go silent,” I demand. “I need you in my ear, Tess. I’m trusting you.”
I can’t believe I just admitted that.
Either way, my pretty little engineer understands the assignment.
She’s in my ear for every corner, her tone smooth and calm, even when Vinny slips past.
I rush the detection line, and her voice comes next. “DRS, Rome.”
The rear wing flap drops, and I fucking fly.
Tessa gasps excitedly, and like I’m a starving man, it feeds me.
I’m at my top speed and move ahead of him at the last second.
Vinny tries to catch up, but the DRS has already done the damage. He backs off, knowing that if he has contact with my car, he’ll be at fault, and given the way he’s raced today, the FIA won’t let it slide.
“Yes! Good job, Rome!” Her excitement is…cute.
She grumbles next. “He’s a fucking asshole.”
I slow the car and hide my amusement behind my helmet.
“I hope our radio feed doesn’t get aired on national television. What would your boyfriend do if he knew you called him such a name?”
She hums under her breath. “I don’t know. What would your little girlfriends do if they heard you say that you liked me whispering in your ear?”
My eyebrows furrow. “I did not say that.”
There is no way I admitted that, right?
“And what girlfriends? I don’t date.”
The radio cuts off, and I’m still left wondering if I admitted that I liked her voice in my ear.
I didn’t, right?