Chapter 9
I’m watching Jordan sleep in my lap, much the reverse of what we did when we went to Vancouver. One of his manicured hands is entwined with mine. We’re coming home from the best weekend of my life.
We spent most of the rest of our time in Vancouver, in bed. I’m sore but not sated. I can’t get enough of Jordan Grayson. He’s gotten under my skin, too. I’m disappointed that in a couple of hours, we’ll be separated. I need to go home and take care of preparations for work tomorrow, and he has an early breakfast meeting at the ungodly hour of six. Who has a breakfast meeting at six in the morning? I guess Jordan does.
I’m going to miss sharing his bed, his space, his generosity, and, most of all, him. After only a week, I’m thinking about the long term. He already mentioned me meeting his mother at a garden party at her home in Connecticut. It means that I’ll come face to face with Nicky outside of work. Even though she and Jordan’s stepfather are divorced, they remain good friends. I’m debating if I should go or not.
I stare down at him, ruffling his thick blonde hair with my fingers. His eyes flutter open, and he smiles up at me .
“What are you doing, doll?”
“Playing with your hair. It’s so soft.”
“Not as soft as yours. I can’t convince you to stay with me tonight?”
“No. Jordan, I need to go home and take care of things. I’ve been away since Friday, and Nathaniel is gone. He left this morning,” I feel a pang of sadness when I mention Nate. We haven’t spoken face to face since we had our argument. But at least we reconciled on the phone.
“You could take care of things at your apartment; then I can have Albert pick you up later.”
“No. You’re just going to have to sleep alone tonight.”
He sits up, “I’m not sure when we’re going to be able to spend time together this week. I have a heavy schedule, and I need to go to Dallas on Tuesday afternoon.”
The prospect of being away from Jordan all week is not something I want to deal with, but its reality. I have a job, and he has a company to run. We need to live our lives separately as well as together.
“We have the phone and Skype.”
“That doesn’t make up for you not being in my arms.”
“Get used to it, Mr. Master of Industry. I don’t like it any more than you do. What about next weekend?”
“I need to check my schedule with James, my assistant. Things come up all the time, though. If I have to travel, would you come with me?”
“Is this going to become a constant thing?”
“Not normally. I don’t always travel on the weekends. It’s just that I have several deals going on that require my attention.”
“Don’t you pay people to take care of those things for you?”
“I do, and my staff is quite capable, but I didn’t get where I am by letting others handle my business. I need to be aware of all the goings-on. CEOs that don’t pay attention get in trouble financially. ”
“But, your company is solid.”
“It is because I pay attention to every aspect. My heads report to me every week. I have trouble relinquishing control. I’m driven, something I learned from my stepfather.”
“Jordan, what happened to your father?”
“He died when I was eight. He had a car accident coming home from work one night. I was sitting in the yard waiting for him to play catch with me, and two policemen came to the house to talk to my mother. I’ll never forget that day.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“Thank you. It was a long time ago. Robert came into our lives a couple of years later. They married when I was eleven. It was tough going there for those two years. My mother worked two jobs, and I was left alone a lot. After she married, she quit her jobs, and Robert moved us into his home.”
“Did you live with Nicky?”
“Nicky was at the house on the weekends. He lived with his mother.”
“Did you get along?”
“We did, but sometimes he got on my nerves. Nicky was very spoiled. I often wondered what it was like to have whatever you want. My father wasn’t a rich man, but he worked hard to support us. We had few luxuries, but I understood even at a young age.”
“You’re making up for it now.”
“Don’t you think I deserve it? I work for what I have,” he snaps.
“Jordan, I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“I just want you to understand why I work hard. I never want to be without.”
“I do understand. I don’t want help from anyone either. I want to support myself.”
“It’s simply not supporting myself. It’s being able to do what I want when I want. I enjoy my lifestyle.”
It seemed that from Jordan’s tone, he was itching to start an argument. I decide to disengage from the conversation and head to the bathroom before we landed.
When I got home, the apartment was clean and filled with the fragrance of roses. I thought that Jordan sent me flowers the day before as a surprise for my homecoming, but the card attached was from Nathaniel.
I’m sorry, baby girl. I love you more than you know. I’m going to miss you while I’m gone. I’ll be in England for the next few days and try to call you at a decent hour. Don’t let Jordan wear you out too much.
Love you,
Nate
Tears formed in my eyes. I loved Nathaniel so much. He always cares about my well being and protected me. He was my rock and the person that I must trust to talk me in off the ledge when I needed it. He could make me see that things weren’t so bad. I was going to miss him during his time away. I was happy that it would only be a couple of months. At least when he was in the Hamptons, I could visit him.
I unpacked the suitcases of the clothing that Jordan had gotten for me. I thought of our last conversation. It was a heated argument about me staying with him tonight and maybe flying to Dallas for a few days. I had told him no, I didn’t want to be kept. I had a job and couldn’t just drop it. He had said he would talk to Nicky, and that was the last straw.
So I have plenty to be upset about. For the last five minutes of the drive, I crossed my arms and looked out the window, ignoring Jordan. When he tried to kiss me, I pulled away. Albert brought my bags in the lobby for me while Jordan brooded in the car.
I get busy preparing for tomorrow. I’m sure I’m going to hear it from Angie when I get into work. She’s probably angry that I disappeared without telling anyone where I went. I’m sure she’ll want to know all the details of my trip to Vancouver. But I’m not sure if I want to reveal my relationship with Jordan before I figure out what it is. He confuses me with mixed signals.
I feel like he wants a companion rather than a girlfriend. I don’t want to be a companion, I want a relationship with him, but it has to be fifty-fifty, not just what he wants.
Monday, I’m in a shitty mood. I haven’t heard from Jordan, I had to stand on the subway, and I left my travel mug sitting on the kitchen counter. Now I’m on my way to Nicky’s office. I wonder what he wants; it’s not even 9:00. I knock on his door, and he tells me to enter.
“Emma, how was your weekend?”
“Fine. Why do you ask?”
“You spent it with Jordan, didn’t you?”
“Nicky, does this meeting have anything to do with work, or are you just trying to pry into my personal life?”
“I guess you didn’t listen to my warning. Jordan has his agenda.”
“Jordan has been nothing but nice to me.”
“I bet he has. Let me tell you about my brother’s playbook. He whisks you away on some spur of the moment trip, buys you some designer clothing, and tells you that you’re under his skin? Am I right?”
My stomach starts to clench with nausea. How the fuck could Nicky possibly know that Jordan did that unless he’s done it for other women?
“That’s not how it happened,” I say weakly.
“Emma, I’m just telling you to watch out for Jordan.”
“Funny, he told me the same thing about you.”
I don’t wait for him to reply. I walk out of his office, hurrying to the nearest bathroom to vomit my breakfast out. When I get back to my cubicle, Angelica is in. Here we go, I think, as she glares at me.
“Nice of you to worry everyone.”
“Angie, I’m sorry. I didn’t know that Nate was going to call everyone in a panic. There was nothing to worry about.”
“Not telling anyone where you’re going is a stupid thing to do. You don’t know this guy that well. He could be anyone.”
“He’s hardly anyone to worry about because he’s so high profile.”
“I don’t care.”
“Why are you so upset with me?”
“Because I fucking got engaged, and you weren’t around for me to tell. You’re my best friend.”
“Congratulations, and I’m sorry. How did you get engaged? You’ve only been back with Charles a week.”
“He bought the ring just before I broke up with him. I realize that I made a huge mistake. He’s wonderful. Charlie got right down on one knee and proposed right in the middle of his kitchen. I would have liked to share it with you, but then I got that lame text. I was angry.”
“He wants me to move in with him.”
“Are you going to do it? ”
“Yes. I hate traveling from New Jersey, and I sleep at his place anyway. It makes sense.”
“I’m happy for you, Angie.”
“You’re going to be my maid of honor. You know that, right?”
“I was hoping.”
I get up to hug her and sit down just as Nicky’s assistant piles three more manuscripts on my desk. Great, I guess I’m going to be busy all week.
“So, what’s this thing with Jordan?”
“I don’t think it’s anything. I don’t know if I mean anything to him. We just had a nice weekend together.”
“You sound sad about it. What happened?”
I spend the next ten minutes explaining the exchange I had with Jordan on the plane, in the limo, and what Nicky said to me.
“Nicky’s an asshole, you can’t believe what he says,” she whispers.
“But it just raises red flags. Is he that type of guy?”
“I don’t know if he is or not. I’m not sure I want to find out.”
“Emma, you do this all the time. Give a guy a chance to explain.”
“I’m trying, but I just don’t know.”
I get to work, but nausea never leaves me. I get a cup of tea for lunch, hoping it will settle my stomach, but it doesn’t. I haven’t eaten anything since this morning’s half a bagel, and that ended up in the toilet. By the end of the day, my stomach is growling loudly, but I still don’t feel like eating.
On the way out of the building, I see a limo parked by the curb. As I pass, Albert gets out. “Miss Stanford, Mr. Grayson would like me to bring you to his place.”
“Tell Mr. Grayson that I have plans. Let him buy some other woman's clothing and whisk her away to a destination.”
Albert raises his eyebrows, and when he sees that I have no intention of getting in the limo, he gets in and drives away. Good. I’m not someone that Jordan can just order around at his beck and call. I need time to gather my thoughts and figure out what I’m going to say to him. Nicky’s revelation has rocked me.
The subway is crowded and standing room only. To top it off, the air conditioning in my car broke, and I’m pouring sweat by the time my stop comes. I’m thankful that a gentle breeze is blowing the hot air outside the station. It dries my skin while I’m walking to my apartment.
As I walk in the door, my cell starts chiming in my purse. I plunk it down and fish out my phone to see that it’s a call from Jordan. I also received two previous calls from him but couldn’t hear them over the din of the subway. I’m not answering it, let it go to voicemail.
Instead, I’m going to take a nice cool shower and get into some shorts and a tank top. I put the air conditioner on high and strip in my bedroom. The water feels good in this hot weather. I stay there for over twenty minutes. The apartment is starting to get nice and comfortable from the air conditioner. I shiver a little as I wrap myself in a towel and begin combing my wet hair in front of the mirror.
Over the rattle of the air conditioning, I think I hear a knock at my door, but I’m not expecting anyone. I hear it again, louder and more insistent. Who the hell could that be? I’m wrapped in a towel, and I look through the peephole. Jordan.
“Emma, open the door. I know you just looked through the viewer.”
“Jordan, I’m in no mood for you now. Go home.”
“Let me in so we can discuss this in private. I don’t think you want your neighbors to know our business, do you?”
“We have no business. Go away.”
“I’ll sit out here all night. I can work on my phone while I wait for you to get over your tantrum.”
That tears it, me having a tantrum? I go to the door and fling it open. He’s standing there looking delicious and fresh in his charcoal-colored suit. How can he be that way in this heat? He pushes his way into my apartment, kicking the door closed as he drops his phone in his pocket and grabs my hands. Jordan holds my wrists above my head with one hand and presses his body against me.
“Why are you ignoring me?”
“I don’t want to talk to you. Now let me go.”
He wraps his hand around my wet hair and gently pulls my head back, then he firmly presses his lips against mine. I refuse to open my mouth and keep my lips clamped shut.
“Open, Emma.”
When I don’t, he removes his hand from my hair and tugs at the knot in my towel.
“Don’t Jordan. I’m upset with you.”
“You’re stubborn. We had a discussion, and you’re taking it personally.”
“You’re trying to interfere for your gain. You can’t just talk to my boss and ask that he give me off on a whim. It’s not only that. There are other things I found out that tell me we shouldn’t be together.”
Jordan lets my hands go, “Like what?”
“I don’t want to be one of your girls.”
“My girls? What the hell are you talking about?”
“Nicky told me. I’m not the only one you’ve whisked away for a weekend, bought clothes for, and said I’m under your skin. Have you? Don’t lie to me, Jordan, please don’t lie.”
Jordan looks down at the floor, exhaling slowly, “I’ve done it one other time, and it was several years ago when I was just starting to come into my own.”
“So I’m not special. This is your thing.”
“It’s not my thing. You’re my thing. I can’t be clearer that I want you.”
“You want to control me. You want me to do what you want.”
“Emma, I want you to spend time with me. If that’s controlling, then yes, I want to control you. I don’t know how to make you understand.”
“I don’t understand. This is new to me. It’s been so long since I had a man that wants to spend time with me and not just to get in my pants.”
Jordan smirks, “Well, I do want to get in your pants. Very much so.”
“You’re impossible. Stop joking around.”
I slip under his arm that he has leaning against the wall and head to my bedroom to dress. He follows me and sits on the corner of my bed. His heated gaze follows me as I remove clothing from my dresser.
“Come to my apartment tonight.”
“No. I have things to do here.”
“Such as?”
“Just things. I haven’t been home since Friday.”
“What are you going to sit around, order take out and watch television all night? You could have stimulating conversation with me over a gourmet meal.”
“I have a feeling conversation won’t be the only thing stimulated.”
“We don’t need to have sex. I just want you with me.”
“No. I’m fine staying here.”
Jordan stands up and removes his jacket and starts loosening his tie, which he pulls over his head.
“What are you doing?”
“If you won’t come home with me, then I’m staying here.”
“I didn’t invite you.”
He ignores me and continues to undress until he’s down to his underwear. I begin to giggle.
“Why are you laughing?”
“Because you look funny in a white t-shirt, gray boxers, and black socks.”
“I could take everything off and walk around naked. ”
“Suit yourself.”
I begin to heat as he removes his t-shirt, revealing his muscular torso. His socks come next, and as he hooks his fingers in his boxers, I stop him, standing on my tiptoes to kiss his cheek.
“You said naked. I’m not fully naked.”
“We should go to your place. I have nothing to feed you.”
“Will you stay the night?”
“Yes. When are you leaving for Dallas?”
“Tomorrow afternoon. I should be back by Thursday evening.”
I’m still wearing my towel; my clothes piled on the dresser. I take it off and begin dressing. Jordan approaches me, his hand cupping my breasts. He bends his head to suckle my nipples, and I dig my fingers in his thick hair. When he stands, his boxers are tented, and I can feel my core flooding. I want him and just from thirty seconds of touch.
He backs me against my dresser, helping me to sit on it, pushing my heels against my ass. I’m at the edge, wide open. Jordan kneels and licks me from opening to clit. Oh fuck, it feels terrific. His soft hot tongue penetrates me, and I can’t help but whimper.
“You’re so wet, so quickly. I’ve barely touched you.”
“I can’t help it that you turn me on.”
He stands and looks into my eyes, “I’m going to fuck you, Emma, good and hard.”
His boxers whisper as they hit the floor. One second he’s pressing against me and the next, he’s inside, filling me deeply. Jordan leans against me, pushing my back to the mirror as he pumps his hips. I can’t move because his body prevents it. I don’t need to because he’s so skilled.
“I love your tight little pussy.”
Wow, no one has ever said that to me before. He keeps talking dirty, and it’s a huge turn on. I brace my hands against his shoulders, digging my nails into the taut muscles.
“Say my name. Tell me you love when I fuck you. ”
“Jordan,” I cry.
“Again,” he growls.
“Jordan, Jordan, Jordan.”
He keeps slamming his hips against me. I can feel his balls slapping my ass. He bites my earlobe than trails his tongue down my jawline, finally burying it in my welcoming mouth. I suck and nibble at it, tasting myself. My sex ripples, and he knows that I’m going to orgasm.
“That’s it doll, come for me.”
I try to hold back, make it last, but he’s hit that bundle of nerves in the right spot that’s going to make me fall apart. I bite his biceps and explode around him, moaning against his skin. Jordan continues to ram into me, and I count his movements in my head. By the ninth stroke, he lets out a feral moan and begins to fill me with his semen.
I wrap my arms around his neck and put my forehead against his. Our bodies are misted with sweat, and when I kiss Jordan’s chest, I taste the saltiness of his skin. He looks down at me, poised to say something.
“I love having sex with you. Come to Dallas with me.”
“Oh my God, you’re seriously not saying that while you still have your dick in me.”
“What? Why? What’s wrong with it?”
“You have an unfair advantage. You just gave me an orgasm.”
“So is that a yes?”
“No, Jordan. I am not going to Dallas with you so we can have a sex romp.”
“It won’t be a sex romp. I still have work to do.”
“NO!”
“Alright. Then I’m just going to have to get my fill tonight.”
“I thought you said we didn’t need to have sex.”
“News flash Emma, we already did.”
“Okay, so you’re good for the night.”
“The hell I am. ”
I start laughing because I find it hilarious to have this conversation in the position that we’re currently in. Jordan pulls out of me and helps me to the floor. We go to the bathroom and take a quick shower. My stall is far smaller than his, which gives nowhere near the allowance to have sex.