Chapter 45
I look at the phone in my hand, knowing I have to call him even though I’m terrified of the conversation we’ll have.
I’ve never seen myself as someone who procrastinates when it comes to resolving things. With the amount of problems Amber and I have faced throughout our lives, I couldn’t afford to delay decisions.
Staying or fleeing a city could mean much more than our freedom: our survival.
I stopped believing a long time ago that if they caught us, they’d just take us back to the community.
I think they would kill us. My sister and I are witnesses to their crimes; we know too many secrets, like the “disappearance” of our brother—who they don’t know is alive—and the death of our mother.
I had to grow strong, for myself and for Amber, but now. . .maybe because I’m surrounded by the safety of family, maybe because it’s the first time I’ve ever been in love, but I’ve found every excuse to delay my confrontation with Gianni.
Yesterday, the DNA results came back confirming that the three of us are indeed siblings.
Amos went back to Boston, but he promised that next time, he’d bring Lilly and the kids.
“Don’t do it,” Amber says, walking into my room and looking at the phone in my hand.
“What?”
“You were about to call him. Don’t, please, Elodie.”
I stand and walk over to her. “Amber, what happened? You sound strange.”
She avoids my eyes. “Please, I’m begging you not to call him. Forget about it.”
“I can’t. Our relationship had a beginning and a middle. It needs an end, too, because I still love him, sis.”
She starts to cry, and I grow worried. That’s not why I came here. I don’t want her suffering because of my problems.
“Amber, please calm down. Look, I think it’s better if I move out. You need to spend these last months of your pregnancy surrounded by peace, not tension.”
“Give me your word you won’t call him, Elodie.”
“Then tell me what’s going on.”
She closes her eyes, and when she looks back at me, she shows me her own phone. It’s open to a news site, and the moment I read the headline, it feels like the room begins to spin.
Marriage between Italian businessman and socialite, both from traditional families, to take place in the coming weeks. Gianni Andresano and his longtime girlfriend, Capria Mancini. . .
I don’t even notice the phone slipping from my hand.
I can’t breathe, so I run out to the vast garden, and even when I hear my sister calling my name, I don’t stop.
I push into the trees until Amber’s voice fades away.
I need to be alone. I’m tired of always having to think about someone besides myself. I don’t even want to talk to her right now.
Deep down, I think I was still holding on to hope that it was all just another lie from that woman, but days have passed and the engagement hasn’t been denied. On the contrary, it’s just been confirmed.
I run faster, wanting to leave the pain behind as well as the memories of everything I experienced in Italy.
An illusion. A stupid dream that only brought me more suffering, as if I hadn’t had enough already in this life.
I can’t even see where I’m going. My tears blur everything, and suddenly the ground disappears beneath me.
It feels like I’m flying in slow motion, going nowhere, until I finally feel a sharp blow to the side of my head and everything goes black.
Fear, heartbreak, grief.
The only thing left is darkness.
“Talk to me, Elodie.”
I turn my face to the wall, not because I want to hurt her but because I can’t talk.
Amber’s suffering only adds to mine.
“The Italian is in New Orleans,” Beau says, walking into my hospital room. “He sent detectives across the city.”
“He tried to reach me, too, but I didn’t answer because I didn’t know what to tell him.”
“Don’t answer,” I tell my sister. “I don’t want to talk to him. Beau, can you get me out of the city?”
“What? I don’t think—” Amber starts, but I cut her off.
“I love you, sister, and you know I’d do anything for you, but I need to be alone. Please don’t make me feel guilty. I don’t have the strength to fight or to try to convince you right now. I need you to let me go, Amber.”
“Where to?” Beau asks, taking control of the situation.
“Anywhere he can’t find me.”
“Elodie, you should know Gianni denied the engagement and—”
“No, Amber. I don’t need to know anything about him. What I need right now is rest. I’m exhausted.”
No matter what happens with his relationship with Capria, they’re having a child.
A baby, like the one I just lost. An eight-week-old life I didn’t even know existed, and now it’s gone.
The doctor steps in behind them. “I recommend she rest, but above all, I recommend that she avoid any more emotional shocks.”
I overheard him talking to Beau earlier today, while I pretended to be asleep. The doctor told my brother-in-law I was in the middle of an emotional breakdown.
I don’t think Beau has told Amber, to spare her worry, but the fact he asked where I wanted to go shows me he’s on my side right now.
“I know exactly where to take her, Amber. Elodie’s right, she needs some isolation.”
“No, I’m going with her. We’ve always been a team, and nothing has changed.”
I start to protest, but she raises her hand, asking me to let her finish.
“I promise I’ll stay quiet. I won’t bother you, but I’ll be by your side, at least for this first week.”
I close my eyes and nod, too exhausted to argue.
A few hours later, when I’m already on the way to a house Beau keeps on Grand Island, Louisiana, Amos calls to say he’s flying over to stay with us.
I wish I were strong enough to tell him I don’t need him. But I can’t. Only now do I see that I want them both with me.