Chapter 8
Chapter Eight
Knox
Belle pretends I’m not here, standing in the doorway, as she fusses over making my bed since I didn’t bother to this morning. The air in my bedroom is thick with tension as she studiously ignores my presence. I know I didn’t give her the best first impression of me, but dammit, why did Rhys have to lie?
My chest is tight with guilt. I could simply tell her the truth right now, Rhys’s request for me to play along for a day or two be damned.
He shouldn’t have lied. No good can come from trying to add an omega to our pack based on a lie.
Once Belle’s memory returns, she’s going to realize she isn’t as far from town as Rhys told her. She’s going to think the three of us are creeps holding her hostage, and I’m not sure if a scent-match will be enough to persuade her to look past the lies.
Rhys really made a mess of things this time.
And Percy isn’t much better, going along with the lies so easily. He’s usually the most pragmatic of the three of us. He has to realize that lying to Belle won’t work long-term. Rhys told me while we carried groceries in that he anticipates her memory will return quickly within the next couple of days, since the accident wasn’t severe enough to even leave her with a concussion.
We’re desperate. That’s the only excuse we have for none of us telling her the truth immediately.
I could just tell her now while we’re alone... but what if I jog something in her memory? She might remember she isn’t single at home. Maybe she’s already settled down with someone else, resigned to never finding her scent-match.
The thought of some other alpha or alphas sharing a home with her, surrounding themselves with her sweet cinnamon scent that they can never properly appreciate, makes me sick.
We need more time.
Time that Rhys bought us by lying.
“The other guys sleep downstairs, so the bathroom in the hall is all yours for tonight. Washcloths are in the linen closet behind the door, and there’s an extra toothbrush and toiletries in the drawers on the right.” I keep my stuff in the left-side drawers since I’m left-handed. If I could encourage her to use my soaps without coming off like a freak, I would. I already convinced her to dress in one of my t-shirts and a pair of sweats.
I’m desperate for our scents to mingle in some way, even if only from her wearing my clothes and using my face wash. A desperate man will take whatever he can get.
“Thank you.” Belle stops fussing over the covers and wrings her hands together.
“Do you need anything else?”
Like maybe for me to stay and watch you sleep so that I know you’re safe in my bed and not going anywhere?
Belle purses her lips and thinks for so long that my shoulders tense, and I try to swallow my over-eagerness to prove myself useful to her in some way. Rhys got her to safety. Percy fed her and offered to read to her to help her relax. I want to do more than be the asshole demanding she sleep in my bed.
“Where will you sleep?” she finally asks. She glances at the oversized bed, custom-built to be bigger than a king-sized bed, as if I’m planning to crawl under the sheets beside her. I wish I could; I wish she looked less nervous about the prospect. She drags her teeth across her bottom lip.
“The couch.”
Won’t be the first time I’ve fallen asleep there, though usually I only sleep on the couch when I’m falling asleep during a long-winded documentary or fantasy film that Percy has demanded Rhys and I watch with him.
Belle grimaces.
“I’m sorry that you have to give up your bed for me.” She picks up my favorite pillow to squeeze in her arms for comfort
“Don’t have to do anything,” I correct her. I’m the one who wanted to offer up my bed for tonight, instead of her staying in Rhys or Percy’s bed.
She drops her chin into my pillow, her expression slightly anguished. Her nostrils flare, and I wonder if she’s reacting to my scent half as much as I am to hers.
Cinnamon.
Like a warm treat is baking in the oven, tempting me.
I don’t want her to argue about sleeping in my bed. No way in hell is she going to be the one spending the night on the couch as if there’s no space for her here. There’s space. We’ll make whatever space she needs. Our pack has been waiting for this moment for far too long.
“Belle,” my voice comes out rougher than intended, “you need rest. We have a lot to sort out tomorrow, and we need to try to figure out more about who you are. Get in the bed.”
I clench my jaw to avoid saying more like, I need you to stay. You’re not going anywhere.
“Okay.” She nods as she places the pillow back on the bed amongst the others.
In a perfect world, she would invite me to help her into bed. In the real world, she keeps her eyes trained on me skeptically as she pulls back the sheet and slips under the dark covers on my bed. Smart woman. We’re still strangers, even with the scent-match heavy in the air. She’s right to be wary while she gets to know us and waits for her memory to return.
I squeeze my hands into fists at my side to help me resist the urge to go to her. All of my willpower is being tested as she shuffles around on my mattress, giving a happy sigh when she settles into a good spot... right where I usually sleep.
She has no idea that she’s cocooning herself in my normal place, pressing herself against the space I’ve imprinted in the bed.
I bite back a groan.
“Goodnight,” I snap, my repressed desire to go to her coming out as frustration.
Her lips twitch into a frown. “Night,” she responds softly. “Thank you.”
I nod tersely, unable to help myself. The more embarassed I am about acting like an asshole to her out of self preservation, the more I seem to double-down on being a jerk. Either I rein myself in, or I risk alienating her from me completely.
No matter how nice Rhys and Percy might be to her, she has to choose all of us in order to be the pack’s omega. Am I really going to risk being the one that fucks this up for all of us?
I need an outlet. My art workshop is calling me.
Get out , I tell myself. I’ve lingered in the bedroom with Belle long enough, and it’s past time for me to give her space to get a good night’s sleep. In the morning, I can try to be on my best behavior so she doesn’t think I’m an irredeemable ass.
“Knox?” Belle calls out softly before I can leave.
The only way I can continue to resist the urge to go to her is by bracing my hands with a tight grip around the door frame. If I get too close to her in my bed, I’m going to crack. I’ve resisted this long. I need to pretend to have a single ounce of self-control, even if it’s only an act. No way in hell will I risk scaring her off.
“The bed smells like you.”
Her words crack my chest wide open. My heart is throbbing, desperate to pull her close and let her feel the way my heart beats a special rhythm for her.
“I like the way you smell like Sage,” she mumbles sleepily, her voice warped like she’s pressed her face into my pillow.
I’m going to break.
That’s all I can take. I need to be close to her. Need to sleep with her pressed up against my side all night so that I know she’s safe and not leaving us.
Prepared to throw my morals out the window, I whirl around to face the bed again. The sight that greets me leaves me frozen in place, unable to step closer. She’s fast asleep on the bed, curled up on her side with her face buried in my favorite pillow, my thick comforter still tucked up around her neck so that she’s barely even visible except for an ear and her messy hair splayed over my pillow.
She lets out a soft snore, and I force myself to walk out of the room and leave her in peace. The most painful thing I’ve ever done.
At least I know she’s staying. For tonight. For always.
She’s staying.