CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
THE DOOR SLIPPED OUT of her grasp, sending a loud thud through the library’s entrance. Amber winced as Mrs. Filch popped out from behind the librarian’s desk, her glare sharp and intense through the glass of her spectacles.
“You’re in the library. Keep it down,” she hissed.
“Hi, Mrs. Filch. Sorry about that.” With an apologetic wave, Amber skittered past the table. The older woman got vicious when anyone disobeyed the library rules. A few students who snuck in snacks and drinks last year were thumped on their heads with bulky Biology textbooks when Mrs. Filch caught them. Their parents found it hard to defend their children’s behavior against Mrs. Filch’s argument of ‘degenerate and unruly children running amuck in the sanctuary of knowledge and learning.’
Amber didn’t want to be the next victim of the old librarian’s textbook beating. She turned past the aisles, easily navigating her way to the table that she, Noah, Evelyn and Emmett had shared for the past weeks. Amber had never thought she would enjoy studying, but her unlikely pairing with Noah had been more than a blessing in disguise. In the course of three weeks, she’d earned Emmett and Evelyn’s friendship, met Noah’s amazing mom, had an adventurous day at Coney Island and had been kissed in a meadow under a beautiful night sky.
Her cheeks heated fiercely at the memories. Why did the library feel hotter now? She tilted her head to see the air conditioning units were on full blast. Amber approached the table, fanning her hand across her skin.
“Everything okay?” Evelyn asked. She was seated at the table, her books open. Two bags sat at her elbow but Emmett and Noah were nowhere to be seen.
“Yeah, it’s fine,” she answered, taking a seat beside her.
“You look flustered, and you keep fanning yourself. Are you sure?”
Amber slowed the motion of her hand. She blushed deeper under Evelyn’s probing. “I’m fine, Eve,” she squeaked unconvincingly.
Evelyn shot her a puzzled look. Before she could ask anymore, Emmett strolled up the table, dropping a textbook. “Hey, Amber,” he greeted.
“Hey. What’ve you got there?”
He groaned, flipping open the book. “Mr. Tiller wants to give us a pop quiz before the midterms. I’m gonna have to study before the real exams. I don’t have the brain space for that with the football game on Saturday.”
“You don’t have the brain space for a lot of things,” Evelyn sniggered.
Emmett shot his sister a glare, but surprisingly stayed quiet. Amber dropped her notes. “Noah isn’t here yet?”
Emmett shook her head. “He got held up. Gave me his bag and said he’ll be right behind me.”
Amber nodded. “Great. I have a few questions on a topic. His tutoring has been way more helpful than I thought.” She never guessed she would be able to admit that.
“Noah said you’re both almost done working on the assignment.” Evelyn lifted her hair into a bun. The brown strands swept up gracefully creating a perfect hairstyle.
“We’re practically done. I keep forgetting to take it off my reading table and put it into my bag. I would have submitted it already.”
“Or maybe your subconscious doesn’t want you to submit it cause you’d miss us.” Emmett smirked, his eyes on the textbook as he flipped a page.
Amber’s brows furrowed. “What do you mean?”
“Yeah, what do you mean?” Evelyn echoed, narrowing her gaze on her twin in a warning that completely went over his head.
“The assignment was what brought you and Noah together in the first place, right?” He began. “We never would’ve gotten to hang out with you or become friends if it wasn’t for that. An inner voice might be telling you that when you submit the assignment, there won’t be a reason to hang out with us anymore. Especially Noah, seeing as you couldn’t stand him at all before.”
An odd feeling crawled into her chest. There hadn’t been an inner voice, but suddenly there was one now. Whispering in her ear and sinking dread into her stomach.
“Plus,” Emmett continued, scratching at his chin. “You did well on your part of the deal that Noah has his plate full with student body responsibilities. Both students and teachers have been meeting with him. He’s swamped which means he probably won’t have time to argue with you. You’ll be free to avoid him.”
The sinking feeling worsened and Amber clutched at her skirt beneath the table. She wasn’t only going to lose Evelyn and Emmett, but Noah too?
“Ow.” Emmett yelped, clutching onto his ankle. “What was that for?”
“I think you’ve said enough.” Evelyn side-eyed him. “Stop trying to get into Amber’s head when you know that won’t happen. Amber is our friend now and she’s not going anywhere.”
“I was only sharing what I thought. You didn’t need to kick me.”
Evelyn stuck her tongue at her twin, her gaze returning to Amber with a concerned glint in them. “Don’t listen to him, okay?”
Too late , she wanted to say as panic threatened to rise in her throat. Emmett’s words had unfortunately found soft soil and had begun sprouting doubts in her. She didn’t want to be separated from the twins. Their jovial manner, open kindness and constant rivalry made her laugh. They pulled her out of her head, she relaxed around them. She enjoyed their company immensely. She and Noah had kissed twice, and a little bit more. They had shared their dreams and hurts. He saw her. He understood her. For the first time, it was like there was someone who had her back unconditionally. She didn’t want to lose that. She couldn’t.
“Hey, hope I’m not too late.” Noah settled in the seat next to Amber almost forty minutes later.
“You are.” Evelyn glared as she zipped her bag. “Amber wanted to ask you some questions, but we have to get to practice.”
Noah’s eyes fell to her, then to the notebook before her. “Give me five minutes. Ask me whatever you want.”
“It’s fine.” Amber shook her head. “We really have to go.”
He sighed, raking a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry. I would have gotten here earlier but Principal Ellis wanted to check the textbooks at the delivery truck to be sure we got what was ordered.”
“Oh, the new textbooks have arrived?” Evelyn asked.
“Yeah, and some new bookshelves too.”
“Sweet,” Emmett added. “That was quick though. Isn’t there a longer processing time or something?”
“It was probably a rush order.”
Distracted by the news, Amber jumped a little at the warmth of a hand on hers under the table. Noah grasped her hand in his, spreading sparks up her arm. Her face flushed as his gaze pinned her down in her seat. She wavered towards him unintentionally, drawn to him in a way she didn’t care to understand.
“I’m sorry I’m late. I owe you a tutor session.”
“And a strawberry milkshake for making me wait so long,” she joked.
“With two cherries? Done.” His lips curved, those eyes flashing with amusement. Amber could easily recall the way they had reflected the stars and that mesmerizing golden glow within them.
He started to say more when the soft call of his name turned their heads. Their hands fell away from each other as Mrs. Filch walked by, rolling a cart with several shiny textbooks piled on it.
“We can start shelving these,” she said. Running her eyes over everyone, she added, “I’m starting with the Geography section.”
“I’ll be right there,” Noah answered.
“The job calls, Mr. Never-Off-Duty President,” Emmett snickered.
“Maybe. But I’m not doing this one alone.” He thumped Emmett’s shoulder. “Let’s go.”
Emmett’s smirk wiped off his face. “What? Why?”
Noah ignored him as he and Amber stood. He held out her notebooks to her, a soft smile creeping onto his face.
“We’ll talk later.”
Amber smiled back, unable to resist. “I’ll be waiting.”
The bedside clock glowed eight minutes after ten. Amber sighed as she stared blankly at the journal on her lap and the dark phone screen on the pillow beside her. She should have been getting ready for bed, but after another tense dinner shared with her mother, she had needed to do something with her thoughts.
Up in her room, she had been eager to dig her journal out of its hiding place – a drawer in her closet where she stuffed all her writing notebooks and journals under a pile of blankets – so she could continue the next few chapters. Her mind had been swirling with so much inspiration since going to the meadow. She had successfully written the starry night scene after being stuck on it for days. More ideas poured into her brain the more she wrote, the words coming to her easily, the imagery stitching together at the scratch of her pen. It was an amazing feeling. A freeing one. Like what Noah gave her. The warmth she felt when she was around him was new and inexplicable and…precious. Noah filled her head and her heart with hope. She wasn’t willing to let go of him. At this point, she wasn’t sure she would ever be.
Her gaze fell onto the book in her lap. Her stories had always been trapped in them, for her eyes only. The only person who ever saw them was Noah because she kept them hidden away like some dirty secret. Would they ever be able to see the light of day? Would she ever be able to stand proudly and claim her stories as her own? She ached for that more than anything. Writing was her passion. Her stories were her lifeline. But they weren’t anything her mother would condone. She had made that clear the day she’d walked into Amber’s room and had seen thirteen-year old Amber scribbling away when she should have been on her way to the theatre for ballet practice.
Her words as she snatched the note from Amber would remain a scar on her heart forever.
“You will not waste time on writing silly stories when you should be building your career. The moment you put on those shoes, you chose your path. I won’t let you throw away everything I’ve done because you want to spend your time on some stupid writing!”
The hurt of her mother’s words on top of her father’s recent passing had effectively torn Amber from her stories. Until she had found them again. She was doing everything she could not to lose them this time, even if she had to hide the truth from her mother. It was a small rebellion that pricked at Amber anytime she thought about it too deeply.
The chime of her phone rescued her from the glum memory. The sight of Noah’s name brought on a smile that completely dismissed the previous thoughts. She grabbed at her phone to read the text.
NOAH
Miss me yet?
AMBER
Nope.
Who are you again?
NOAH
Haha.
I’m sorry again. I couldn’t help with your questions.
AMBER
It’s fine. You were busy.
I’m waiting on the tutor session you owe me.
NOAH
And the double cherry milkshake?
AMBER
Definitely.
Her fingers hesitated at the next text she wanted to send. She bit at her lip in thought, then sucked in a breath of courage.
AMBER
You held my hand today.
It didn’t bother you that Evelyn and Emmett were right there?
She dropped the phone to collect herself. Everyone knew how much she and Noah bantered constantly. The halls at school had been oddly quiet since they had stopped their bickering, or at least they kept it to themselves whenever they teased each other. Emmett thought the only thing holding Amber and Noah together was the deal they had agreed to, but it ran farther than that. What would be their reaction to finding out that Amber had taken several steps out of the friend zone with their friend.
Her phone buzzed in her hand.
NOAH
I don’t mind holding your hand.
I’ll hold it forever if you let me. In fact, there’s nothing else I’d rather do.
Was there such a thing as a full-body blush? Because Amber was sure she had gone red from the tips of her hair to the ends of her sock-clad feet. Noah Rhodes could be too sweet for his own good. The realization that she was one of the only people to see this side of him made her melt all over again. She was tempted to squeal into her pillows while kicking her feet. Noah made her want all the clichés.
AMBER
Hey, boy genius.
You should smile more. It suits you.
NOAH
Does it suit me? Or do you like seeing my smile?
AMBER
Both.
He didn’t respond for a minute and Amber wondered what his reaction was at her admission. A giggle left her, her heart beating at random in her chest. How had she lived her life without feeling this happy at every moment and how was it that Noah so easily brought it out of her?
NOAH
Good to know.
Goodnight, m’lady
Dream sweet dreams of me.
A corny smile spread across her face as she wished him goodnight. She would dream sweet dreams. Dreaming of him, though. That wouldn’t be anything new. He had always been the star of her dreams, even when he’d been the boy she had liked to dislike.