Chapter Fifteen
C al’s shift on Thursday had been steady so far. Calm. Pleasant. Bread and butter cases, nothing too exciting, nothing unnecessary. Yukon Valley’s patients, in general, were a tough bunch. No cases of hangnails or minor colds came through those ED doors. The people he saw really needed to be in the ED. He felt useful and productive, like he was making a healthy difference in people’s lives.
Something he did not seem able to do in any aspect of his personal life.
He paused as he exited the ED. There was a pending item on his to-do list. Holding his breath, he checked his phone for a new message. Nothing. He shook his head and stowed the phone.
Instead of dwelling on things he couldn’t fix, he focused on what he could address and followed his nose to the hospital cafeteria. After topping off his coffee mug and filling a lunch tray, he turned, ready to head back to the ED call room.
“Hey, Calvin!”
He paused, spying Dr. Lee Tipton. She was in slacks and a blouse, sitting at a table with Maverick, who wore his usual navy-blue EMS uniform. Their heads were bent toward each other like co-conspirators, which immediately pinged Cal’s warning radar. Yet he strolled over. They both glanced at one another then turned to him with twin smiles. Uh-oh. He gritted his teeth.
“How’s the shift going, Doc?” Maverick said.
Cal nodded. “Not bad. Both of yours?”
“Not bad.” Maverick rapped his knuckles on the wood tabletop.
Lee made a face. “I’m the admitting doc for the hospital, and you’re my pipeline of patients. You tell me how my shift is going. You’ve been kind so far.” She laughed, brushing a hand over Maverick’s on the table. “Don’t worry, we won’t make you say the q-word.”
Quiet. The ubiquitous superstition that every ED physician had. Never say the q-word. Thinking the q-word was even dicey. Allowing that word into your consciousness attracted things like multi-snowmachine pileups or mass moose attacks.
She continued. “Any admits on the horizon? I would like to plan my day.”
Cal looked at the ceiling for a second then checked to make sure no one else was in earshot, then de-identified the information. “Maybe a person with pneumonia. I’ll see how they do for the next few hours, and if they’re still requiring oxygen, we should probably have them stay at least overnight.”
“Sounds good.” Lee made a face at Maverick. “What? Preempting work duties on call is a karma move. If I ask about admissions now, then I’ll either get them done early or they’ll be nothingburgers that take five minutes. If I don’t ask, then at 6:59p.m., he’s going to dump three unstable critical care admits on me. I know how the universe works. Especially when you and I have seven p.m. dinner plans.”
The heated expressions between them made Cal look down at the tray he held. He shifted from foot to foot while they seemed to be telepathically changing their dinner plans to other plans.
“Well, I’m going to head back to my ED cave. You two have a good rest of your day.”
“Oh, hey,” Maverick said with a gleam in his blue eyes, the same color as Deirdre’s. “You still planning on attending the Breakup Festival? I think you had been signed up for the dunk for hospice.”
He hadn’t so much as thought about the Breakup Festival the past several days. Way too much on his mind. “The dunking booth sounds miserable. Yes, I’ll be there.” He hadn’t had any luck getting his shift moved around so that he would have to work that day. Truth be told, he did view participation as a way to honor Elijah by raising money to help other patients and families with end-of-life care.
“It is for a good cause.” Lee asked, all innocence that Cal in no way bought. “So”—that one word got drawn out into three syllables, thanks to her Southern accent—“are you going to the festival with anyone?”
Cal didn’t trust the motives of either one. “Possibly.”
“Anyone I know?” he asked.
“Possibly.”
“Do tell,” she said.
He kept his voice low. “Deirdre and I are attending together.”
Maverick and Lee both looked at each other then smiled.
Lee studied Cal until his skin twitched. “It’s not a punishment, you know,” she said.
“With my sister, it could be.” Maverick laughed. He put a hand to the side of his mouth. “She’s kind of bossy.”
“She’s fine,” Cal said vaguely. He hated the deception, but giving everyone a controllable bone of gossip to chew on was better than capricious matchmaking and relentless prying.
It was bad enough he had committed to a fake relationship. Earlier this week, he had apparently managed to ruin it. How could someone screw up something that didn’t exist? Exhibit A: Cal.
He looked up. The wonder twins were still staring at him.
He patted his phone and pretended to read a text while he juggled the cafeteria tray. “Gotta go. ED needs me.”
“Huh,” Lee said, lifting an eyebrow.
Chances were, she knew that move. Fake pages worked for years to get him out of boring lunch lectures in residency, timed to occur right after the food was finished and the speaker had begun talking. Busted.
“See ya later, Calvin.” She waved.
Before he could turn fully around, they leaned toward each other once again. Low murmurs and laughter chased him out of the cafeteria.
They were two devious peas in a pod.
Two magnets happily pulling toward each other.
Instead of being irritated, Cal felt… empty. Like he was missing out on something.
His life was fine as it was. He had a flexible schedule. Seattle and Washington state had a lot to offer. He could go whitewater paddling or hiking anytime. No obligations to stop him. No coordinating his life with someone else’s. Work fulfilled him. His parents might drive him a little crazy at times, but he loved them. Their health and safety was a priority.
He had an entire life in Seattle and a place there. He had friends and colleagues. He patted the phone in his back scrub pocket, knowing that he had a way to fix this entire messy situation.
Sure, things could be better. He glanced back as he exited the cafeteria. Lee and Maverick smiled at each other as they murmured.
That was what he could have. The better .
If the situation were different.
If he and Deirdre were different.
He stopped walking. Gripped the tray.
What if she had been right?
What if Cal hadn’t ever been second best?