Chapter Eight
I DID MY BEST NOT to stare at Brooke in her wet suit that beautifully cradled every one of her curves as she played in the water with Eden and Sophie. They were all giggling and splashing each other. The late-afternoon sun seemed to shine its rays directly on my alluring neighbor with an infectious laugh and an almost childlike innocence to her.
Except she was no child. That wet suit spelled out that she was a woman in every sense of the word.
But it was her inner beauty I feared the most. She was anything but the hot mess she’d seemed during our first two meetings. She was lovely, and her candor put you at ease and would have you confessing all your secrets. I still had no idea why I’d told her about my brief career as a big band singer. If that ever got out, Eden would never let me live it down. Even Erica would have laughed about it.
The only reason I could fathom why I’d let my guard down and told her was that Brooke’s vulnerability invited vulnerability. Or maybe it was that smile of hers with the one dimple that filled me with a warmth I hadn’t felt in months. The warmth only women seem to possess.
Brooke even appeared to have some effect on Eden and Sophie. They looked so carefree, giggling and smiling in the water after Brooke had dared them to jump in with her. It was as if Brooke were reminding them that they could be happy. Not that long ago, it would have been me leading the charge into the water. It should have been me. I, more than anyone, should have been trying to help my sister and niece heal. My own pain was getting in the way.
It made me curious how Brooke coped so well with her loss. So well that she could help others. Maybe that was her secret—helping others. In my work, I helped people every day, but it wasn’t the same. If I was being honest with myself, I wasn’t the doctor I used to be. I still gave high-quality care and my treatments were accurate, but I’d lost the personal connection I used to pride myself on. Hell, I’d even walked out on Brooke during her exam. I wasn’t proud of it, or of the man I’d become.
I doubted Erica would enjoy this version of me. I could hear her telling me to snap out of it. Not that she would want me to have these thoughts about my neighbor. She’d be the first to say, “You’re not going to be one of those guys, are you?” Those guys meaning the ones who divorced her friends and then hooked up with or married younger women. It didn’t matter if it was an ego thing or a vain attempt to hold on to their youth—Erica had despised those men. And I refused to become one of them. But Erica didn’t need to worry. I hadn’t moved on from her.
Besides, after what I’d witnessed today at Granger’s, I was sure Brooke would have plenty of admirers this summer. She had half the employees enthralled with her as she cracked jokes about getting in and out of the wet suits. I had a feeling the male employees would have all volunteered to help her right out of them.
If I wasn’t mistaken, Jake, the general manager of the store, had asked for her number. He was in Eden’s high school graduating class. I didn’t remember much about him, but if you asked me, he came off as a tool today, the way he’d slyly worked into their conversation that he’d be happy to help Brooke with any of her sporting goods needs.
Not that I was acting much more maturely. I’d begged Eden and Sophie to come out with me while I taught Brooke how to paddleboard. The less alone time I had with her, the better. It didn’t matter that she wanted nothing more than friendship and that I enjoyed her company. I found her too attractive.
“Come on, Uncle Logan!” Sophie yelled. “Jump in!”
Jump in. Those words sounded like a challenge to me. I needed to jump back into life. At the very least, I needed to be more present for Sophie and Eden. So, I ran headlong into the lake and dove in. The frigid water smacked my face, but didn’t penetrate my wet suit. All at once, a surge of energy went through me. It was as if I’d finally shown up to the party. Feeling more like myself than I had in a long time, I went straight for Sophie and picked her up and held her above my head.
“Don’t even think about it,” Sophie squealed in delight while weakly protesting through her giggles. “You’re going to be so sorry if you throw me in the water.”
“Oh, really?” She didn’t scare me at all. “What are you going to do?”
“I’m going to . . . to . . . to . . .” She couldn’t control her laughter.
For a split second, I locked eyes with Brooke. She flashed that infectious smile of hers at me, making me almost drop Sophie. I wrenched my gaze away and focused back on my niece. I was coming to realize the power of Brooke’s smile, and I wouldn’t fall victim to it. If I did, who knew what else I might confess to her? Maybe that I’d auditioned for American Idol once and my voice had unnaturally cracked? Let’s just say it didn’t win me any votes.
“I’m going to make you do crafts with me!” Sophie tried to sound scary.
“I can live with that.” I tossed her in the water.
She came up spluttering, wiping her face with her hands. “This calls for glitter.”
Admittedly, glitter frightened me. That stuff ended up everywhere. My house would sparkle for months. But I’d pay the price to make Sophie happy.
While my sister’s mini-me tried to exact her revenge and dunk me, I couldn’t help but overhear Eden and Brooke’s conversation.
“I’ve been listening to your podcast for the last couple of days, and you’re amazing,” Eden showered Brooke with praise. “The episode where you told the story behind ‘Go Your Own Way’ by Fleetwood Mac—the way you spoke so poetically about one of your own breakups where the guy left you for another woman. It spoke to my soul when you said that ‘going your own way meant the start to a new adventure, but I just wish I didn’t have to be the collateral damage in their love story.’ That last part resonated with me so much,” Eden choked out. “Except for sometimes, I wonder if they intended to hurt me.”
What kind of magic did Brooke possess that she could make Eden—who had been wearing a brave face since she’d arrived—confide in her so easily? I supposed I should have asked why my sister felt like she couldn’t talk to me so candidly. Not that it was a big mystery. I’d closed myself off to everyone, including those I loved most.
Brooke didn’t hesitate to put her arms around Eden, who, for all intents and purposes was practically a stranger. There they stood in the lake, the waves gently lapping up against them, holding on to each other for dear life like they’d known each other for years. I never understood women that way. You’d never catch me hugging some guy I’d just met in the middle of a lake—or anywhere, for that matter.
“My mom once told me it’s better to have a hurt heart than a whole one. Whole hearts give nothing away, but hurt hearts know what it feels like to give it all. Better to know what it feels like to have everything stolen than to have nothing worth stealing. Or so my mom thought.” Brooke patted Eden’s back.
Her mom sounded like one of those online psychologists people love to repost. Which didn’t mean she wasn’t right. She was painfully right. It felt as if life had stolen everything from me.
“Your mom was a wise woman.” Eden’s voice quavered.
“She sure thought so,” Brooke laughed. “I think it was the songwriter in her. The best artists know the highs and lows of life. It’s why we love their songs and stories so much. It’s why I love sharing them.”
“Honestly, you’re so good at it. The new content development team I’ve hired keeps telling me I should start a podcast.”
“You totally should.” Brooke squealed with delight. “It would fit so well with your brand.”
“I don’t have the vaguest idea how or where to start,” Eden lamented.
Brooke leaned away from her, something like pure joy radiating from her. “I could totally help you. Or at least tell you what I’ve learned so far. I’m still pretty new at it.”
“You could have fooled me. Honestly, your podcast is one of the best I’ve listened to.”
“Oh, my gosh, you’re going to make me cry.” Brooke waved a hand in front of her face. “This might be one of the best days of my life. Eden Russo loves my podcast.”
I feared where this was going. All this female bonding. Brooke was going to become a permanent fixture in our lives this summer—maybe forever, at this rate. This wasn’t good news for me.
Brooke looked directly at me, beaming, giving me no choice but to give her my full attention. “We’re all going to be the best of friends this summer.”
“I think so too,” Eden said.
Brooke’s face lit up even more. “I think your brother is going to need more time to think about it. But we’ll get him there.” She winked.
Why did she have to announce the uncomfortable truths out loud?
Eden turned toward me, her smile saying it all. No doubt she was enjoying this. If only she knew the torture I would have to endure all summer if Brooke was a part of it. Didn’t she see my attraction to Brooke causing me consternation and guilt? Or had I become so closed off that my feelings had become unrecognizable? Or did my kid sister like the thought of me in turmoil?
“Did you still want to learn how to paddleboard?” I asked awkwardly, not knowing what else to say. Apparently, though, it was hilarious, judging by Eden and Brooke’s laughter.
This was going to be a long summer.
“Of course.” Brooke walked out of the water toward the paddleboards waiting on the beach, tossing her long, wet tresses, not caring to notice that every man on the beach was admiring her—including me.
Eden made her way over to me and playfully nudged my arm. “Like what you see?” she whispered for my ears only.
Immediately, I averted my gaze. “I wasn’t looking at anything or anyone.” My lie came out stilted.
“Sometimes, the best things happen when we aren’t looking for them.” She patted my arm before joining Sophie, who had given up on trying to dunk me.
I dared a peek at Brooke. She was holding up her paddleboard and waving me out of the water to join her on the shore. Why did I get the impression her invitations were going to be a common occurrence this summer and fighting them was going to be a losing battle? Brooke Crawford seemed determined to make me her friend. Would being friends with a beautiful woman be so awful? I had a feeling I was going to find out.