Jess
Just remind me one more time that I have nothing to worry about.
I smile a little at the text from Kade, but can’t ignore the way my stomach somersaults, too.
You have nothing to worry about. I’ll be in your bed in just a few hours.
The little dots bounce on the screen as I check my reflection one last time in the bar bathroom.
I’ll keep it warm until then.
With another smile, I tuck my phone away, stilling a breath before I make my way out of the bathroom.
This little beach bar hasn’t changed much since the first time I graced its presence.
I still remember that night like it was yesterday, strolling in here looking for a little escape from recruitment.
I thought I’d find a good fruity cocktail and a guy to fawn over me all night before I had to go back to a house full of screaming sisters.
Instead, I found Jarrett.
A shiver races up my spine at the memory of him behind the bar, the wicked smile he gave me, the confidence, the unforgettable first time of him touching me in his truck in the parking lot.
That memory seems to grow three heads and a dozen eyeballs when I round the corner out of the bathroom hallway and spot Jarrett coming in from outside.
It’s chilly tonight, a rare and blessed event in South Florida, so the beach bar that’s normally all open and airy has plastic awnings pulled down to keep out the cold as best they can.
Jarrett is bundled up in a brown leather jacket and dark distressed jeans.
All his tattoos are covered, along with his bald head, thanks to a Patagonia beanie.
I can tell the time he’s spent in Manhattan has given him more fashion sense just by the outfit and designer boots he’s paired with it.
He’s my Jarrett, the same one who stole my heart with just one look.
And yet, he’s a complete stranger, someone I don’t know at all.
His smile is weak when his eyes meet mine, and he makes his way toward me with his hands in the pocket of his jacket.
“Hi,” he says, and I have a flashback to our last conversation — the video chat where he broke up with me.
I clear my throat and force a smile. “Hi, yourself.”
“Thank you for meeting me.”
I nod.
“Shall we?” Jarrett gestures toward the bar, and when we reach it, he pulls out my stool first before taking the one next to me.
It’s been about a year and a half since Jarrett left his job at this bar and took the internship in New York, but still, he’s like a celebrity when he sits down.
The manager comes out and tells the bartender to put our tab on the house, an older woman who worked with Jarrett when he was here comes over to give him a big hug, and even a few patrons pay their respects.
When it’s finally just the two of us again, he sighs, smiling sheepishly at me.
“So,” he says. “My brother has threatened to castrate me if I so much as touch you, but for the record, I really wanted to give you a hug.”
I chuckle. “Better not, just to keep the balls safe.”
“My thoughts exactly.” Jarrett pauses, lifting his beer to his lips for a sip. It makes me happy that even after so long in the city and obviously graduating to better clothing, he still likes an ice-cold Pabst Blue Ribbon. “I will say, I’m glad you didn’t pass out when you saw me this time.”
My cheeks heat, but I don’t really know what to say. Oh, yeah, that. Sorry. Just wasn’t prepared to see my ex-boyfriend whom I had barely gotten over standing next to my current boyfriend’s car. Oh, and double whammy, you two end up being brothers!
I sip my margarita, instead.
Jarrett watches me for a long time, and I feel his eyes crawling over me like they’re a laser beam sparking every cell inside me to life. Those warm brown eyes still know just how to make me feel naked as the day I was born.
I sigh, shaking my head and pushing my drink away before I turn to face him head on. “Jarrett, what are we doing here?”
“Having a drink,” he says, holding up his beer. “Talking. Catching up.”
“Catching up,” I deadpan.
Jarrett lets out a sigh of his own, taking a big gulp of his beer before he says, “I don’t know, Jess. I wanted to see you. I needed to see you.”
My heart squeezes in my chest.
“The way things ended between us… I hated it. I still hate it. I’ve thought about it so much since then. I even tried to reach out to you a few times, but… well… I guess you blocked my number. And I don’t blame you, I just…”
He doesn’t continue for a long while, just stares at where his hand is wrapped around the Pbr can.
“I had to block you,” I say, my voice barely above a whisper.
“Jarrett, I loved you. Fiercely. And I was broken after… after…” I swallow, unable to finish my sentence.
“I just wanted to move on, and I knew you enough to know there was no changing your mind — not once you’d made it up the way you had. ”
He nods in understanding, scratching the scruff on his jaw. “We’re opening a branch here in Miami,” he says. “For the nonprofit. And since I used to live here, they picked me to head the expansion.”
I smile genuinely. “That’s amazing. Congratulations.”
He gives me another weak smile. “Thanks.” A swallow.
“It’s weird. When they told me, I wasn’t really excited about leaving New York.
I wasn’t really able to get excited about anything after dealing with my father this summer,” he adds with a shake of his head.
“But that’s a story for another time. What I’m trying to say is that I have sort of been…
numb. But when they said they were sending me here, there was one little glimpse of light.
” His eyes find mine then, the depths of them endless. “I knew you’d be here.”
I frown, tearing my eyes from his to look at my margarita. I hate the way my stomach tightens at his words, the way my skin heats under his gaze.
“Can I ask you something?”
I nod, still not looking at him.
“What’s going on with you and my brother?”
A little laugh escapes me at that. “It’s a long story.” I pause. “Kind of a humorous one, actually. But… long story short?” I turn to meet his gaze. “We’re dating. And I really, really like him.”
I can see the flash of pain that hits Jarrett at my words, but he swallows it down, smiling. “I’m glad you’re happy. You deserve to be happy.”
“Thank you.”
“For the record,” he says, sipping his beer. “He really, really likes you, too.”
I chuckle, and my hair falls in front of my face a little before I tuck it behind one ear. When I look back at Jarrett, I can see there are a million things he wants to say.
I think there are a million things I want to say, too.
“Look,” he says after a moment. “All the bullshit aside, I know it’s too late to apologize for the past. I know it’s too late to go back to what we had.
And I really don’t want anything more than for you to be okay, to be happy, and it’s clear that you are.
” He shrugs. “But if you’re okay with it, I’d like to be friends. ”
“Friends,” I repeat with an arched brow. “I think we tried that once before.”
He laughs. “Well, things are a bit different now, wouldn’t you say?”
I smile and nod, considering his offer. To say that him being back in town knocked the breath out of me would be an understatement. To say that discovering he was Kade’s brother fucked me up would be the understatement of the century.
But to say that I don’t want him in my life would be a big, fat lie.
“Do you remember the first time we met here,” I ask, looking around with a grin. “And you called me princess?”
He wrinkles his nose. “God, I did, didn’t I?” A shake of his head. “What weak game.”
“Hey, it worked.”
He smiles at me, that smile that melted my heart and my panties the first time he flashed it at me. “It did, didn’t it?”
“I mean, I called you out for it and did my best to emasculate you but, yes, it did.”
“You were such a spitfire,” Jarrett says with a remembering smile. “I’d never met anyone like you.”
“And have you since?”
“I think you know the answer to that,” he says with a laugh.
We just watch each other for a moment after that, and I feel it — the buzzing energy crackling like electricity underneath all the things we don’t say.
“I like the idea of being friends,” I whisper.
“Yeah?”
I nod. “I’ve missed you, Jarrett. If I have the chance to have you in my life again, I want to take it.”
Another flash of something in his eyes, but it’s gone quickly, and then his hand extends for mine. “Friends, then.”
I eye his hand. “I thought Kade said he’d castrate you if you touched me.”
“True,” he says, but leaves his hand extended. “I won’t tell if you don’t.”
It’s just a handshake, a simple pump of my hand in his to solidify our agreement, but the moment our skin touches, I hear the distant hum of a thousand warning bells alarming in sync.
As if he hears them, too, Jarrett swallows and pulls his hand from mine, reaching for his beer, instead. “Now,” he says, taking a sip. “Tell me what the hell you’ve been up to this past year.”
The conversation is easy from there, and I find that it feels natural, sitting there with Jarrett, him telling me about his life in New York while I fill him in on my last year as a college student.
By the end of the night, he’s helping me look for jobs and telling me I’m always welcome at the agency if I need somewhere to get started.
We’re swapping stories and laughing and drinking and everything feels okay.
Maybe Jarrett being back won’t be so bad, after all.
Maybe being friends will be easy, now that we’ve had so much time apart.
Maybe we can all three hang out — me, him, and Kade — one big happy family.
Or maybe I’m still the same walking train wreck I was the night I first walked into this bar, and this whole thing will blow up in my face.
I guess only time will tell.