Chapter 32
T oo bad she didn’t know how to cook.
Maya stared at the rice in horror. Why was it so wet? She’d drained it and now it looked kind of . . . mushy. How had she managed to mess it up so badly? She’d thought it was easy. Put it in water and boil.
Oh, well, once she put the chili on top you wouldn’t see the rice, right?
There. That looked kind of edible.
Hopefully, the chili tasted good. It looked okay. She’d added plenty of chili powder. That could only make it taste better, right?
The chili looked . . . interesting.
Better than the rice anyway. He could tell it was a gloopy mess, but he kept that thought off his face.
She’d tried.
And he would eat it.
He took a bite of the chili, swallowing it hastily. And immediately fire burst through his mouth.
Merde!
She had a forkful of chili and he quickly reached over and knocked it out of her hand before it reached her mouth.
“Hey! What are you doing?” she cried.
But he was up and racing for the fridge. He grabbed the carton of milk and gulped it down.
“Oh no!” she cried, following him. “Is it too spicy?”
“Just a bit,” he said hoarsely. “Whatever you do, don’t eat it.”
“This is terrible!” she cried. “I was trying to make you a nice meal and I nearly set your mouth on fire.”
“I’ll be fine,” he said hoarsely as he gulped down milk.
She shook her head. “No. This is my fault. I wanted to show you that I can cook. But the truth is that I can’t. I’m useless in the kitchen. Like I am at everything! I’m so sorry. I’m just going to . . . I have to go . . . ”
Turning, she ran off.
Shit.
She wished she’d thought to stash some chocolate in her bedroom. Because she could really use some right now.
Chocolate made everything better.
Well, she hoped it would. Right now, it didn’t seem like anything would.
What had she been thinking? She couldn’t cook.
Toast and jelly was more her style.
Or chocolate cake. She made an awesome chocolate cake.
Chili? Really?
There was a knock on her door, but she ignored it. She didn’t feel like peopling right now.
Today had been amazing. Tank had looked like he’d had fun. And when they’d gotten home, instead of immediately retreating to his bed in the spare bedroom, he’d stayed out in the living room for twenty minutes.
It was small but it was definitely progress.
Then you go and ruin everything. You are the great ruiner.
“Maya, come out here, please.”
“Maya isn’t here,” she called out as she hugged Dicky tight. What she wouldn’t give to be able to slip into Little headspace and pretend this never happened.
Her Little didn’t care about embarrassing herself. Her Little only cared about playing with her secret stash of toys. She glanced over at her closet and sighed sadly as she thought about her Lego stashed away in a box.
“Maya, come out please. Come on, Bébé.”
Oh God.
He was using French on her? And wasn’t Bébé baby? Was he trying to kill her right now? Her insides went all gooey and now that she thought about it, that word struck a memory.
Had he called her that before?
No, that was silly.
She was unable to resist going to him, though. He was like the Pied Piper, calling her.
Maya opened the door, but kept her gaze on her feet. She owed him an apology. “I’m so sorry I poisoned you. And that I ran away after.”
Seemed a bit of a habit of hers. And she shouldn’t have left him with the mess to clean up.
He sighed. “Maya, you didn’t poison me. Come on, Spitfire. Stop looking so dejected. Come into the living room. I ordered pizza.”
“I’m surprised you can eat after I destroyed your taste buds.”
“Will take more than a bit of chili to do that,” he reassured her. “Come with me. I want to show you something.”
He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and it took everything in her to resist melting into him. Why was he so huggable? It should be against the law to look that good and feel that amazing.
Really. He should leave something for the rest of them.
“Look, Maya.”
Look at what?
“Look at the fireplace.”
Huh? She glanced over at the fireplace. She’d only tried lighting it once. It had filled with smoke and scared the bejesus out of her. She knew that likely meant she needed her chimney cleaned, but there never seemed to be the money for that.
But sitting on the rug in front of the fireplace was . . .
“Tank,” she whispered.
Big B was with him, laying between him and the rest of the room.
Tears filled her eyes and she nearly let out a sob.
“Don’t make a big deal out of it,” Matthieu whispered. “He did it himself. Walked out of the room with Big B and lay down there. I notice you haven’t got any firewood anywhere. You should probably get that now for when it gets colder.”
He led her to the sofa as he spoke. There was a pizza box sitting on the coffee table. Dougie was sniffing at it from where he sat by the coffee table.
Dougie loved anything with cheese.
“Oh, I never use the fireplace.”
He paused. “You never use the fireplace? Do you have central heat?”
“No, I don’t. I tried to light it once and the room started to fill with smoke. But it’s all right, I have heaters.” Central heat would be amazing but she didn’t have the money to put that in.
“It filled with smoke?” He sounded choked up. Was that the chili affecting him? Oh God. She hoped she hadn’t permanently damaged his vocal chords.
“Are you all right? You sound all funny.”
“Probably because that fireplace is a hazard. It could set the whole house on fire!”
Was that his problem?
“Only if you light the fire. Which I don’t do.”
“You need to have the chimney cleaned,” he told her.
“I know.”
There was a beat of silence. She reached over and flipped open the lid of the pizza box. Yummy.
“You know?” he repeated.
“Um, yep.”
“Then why haven’t you done it?”
“Money.”
He sighed. “I don’t like that. I don’t like it at all.” But he grabbed a piece of pizza and sat next to her.
Maya shrugged. There wasn’t anything to like about it. But it was what it was.
They settled in to watch one of her favorite shows, where dogs got adopted from a shelter. She just loved all the happy endings for those doggies.
She glanced over at Tank again with a smile.
Maybe he’d gotten his happy ending too.
Matthieu felt her slump against him and then a soft snore hit his ears. Tank and Big Berry had already taken themselves off to bed and so had Gummy. Dougie was now asleep in front of the fire that wasn’t even lit. And Princess Priss was sitting on the other side of Matthieu, purring heavily.
He shook his head at himself. Who knew he could feel this content? He was living with a pig for God’s sake. Things didn’t get much weirder than that.
He'd thought Maya might fall asleep. He’d wanted to talk to her about what she’d said about herself earlier, but she’d seemed so defeated and tired that he’d decided to let it be.
For the moment, anyway.
Shifting around, he managed to get her into his arms before he stood.
Princess Priss looked up and gave him a disapproving look.
“You can go get into bed,” he told the cat.
With a swish of her tail and a haughty expression on her face, the cat jumped down and headed into his bedroom.
Yep, at some stage the cat had started sleeping with him at night. He knew he should discourage her. He just hadn’t found the ability to do that yet.
Matthieu carried Maya into her bedroom and laid her down on the end of the bed. Then he drew back the covers and placed her in the bed, tucking her in.
He thought about undressing her, but he didn’t want to make her feel awkward. Hopefully she wouldn’t be too uncomfortable sleeping in her clothes.
She let out a small noise and tossed around. There was a frown on her face.
Shit. What was wrong?
Then he spotted her toy dolphin which was hidden beneath some of the pillows. Grabbing it, he placed it under the covers in her arms. She immediately settled down and he walked over to pull the curtains.
Ryan wasn’t a problem anymore now that he was in jail. The judge hadn’t granted him bail, deeming him a flight risk due to his family’s wealth.
But Maya seemed to attract weirdos and assholes, so he wasn’t taking any chances.
“Matthieu?” she whispered.
Merde.
“ Désolé , Bébé,” he told her. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”
“I like you, Matthieu,” she said on a sigh.
All right.
Perhaps she wasn’t as awake as he’d first thought. He couldn’t imagine her telling him that if she was fully conscious.
“Do you?” he murmured. “What do you like about me?”
“Everything.”
He grinned. Yeah, he should leave the room and let her go back to sleep without revealing anymore of her secrets. But he wasn’t that good of a person.
“Well, not everything. Because you are bossy. You like rules and consequences. That’s no fun. And sometimes you snore.”
“I do not snore,” he said.
“Uh-huh, sure you don’t. But don’t worry, you’re also handsome and sexy and protective and kind. Never had someone care about me so much.”
Her family had a lot to answer for. Because she lapped up his attention and care like someone who had been starved of it for far too long.
There was a question burning in his gut, but he shouldn’t ask.
“Wish you were mine,” she said. “My boyfriend. My Daddy.”
Okay.
Well, maybe that answered his question.
“You ever had a Daddy?” he asked.
“No. No way. Maya can’t have a Daddy.”
“Why not?” he asked, confused. If anyone needed a Daddy desperately, it was her. She needed someone who would force her to put her own care first. Who would ensure she ate and slept and kept herself safe.
“Can’t let anyone close. They might leave me. Everyone leaves me. Not enough to stick around for. Stupid. Ugly. Unlovable.”
Anger flooded through him. That fire flared to life inside of him. From embers to flames.
He knew where those words had come from and they weren’t from her.
That bitch of a stepmother.
Brody had looked into that bitch, but when he had more time he would get him to go deeper. See if there was anything they could use to ruin her.
Or whether they would have to create something.
He didn’t care what he had to do, Kathryn would pay for the way that she’d treated his girl.
“Do not listen to her,” he told Maya fiercely. “You hear me? Whatever she said to you is not true.”
“Am useless. Ruined dinner.”
“So you can’t cook? Not the end of the world. And I prefer to cook for you anyway. I like taking care of you.”
“Matthieu is the bestest,” she said in a small voice.
She sounded like she was slipping into Little headspace. He wanted to see her fully in Little headspace. Relaxed, smiling, happy.
But that wasn’t necessarily what was best for her. Not when he’d have to leave her.
And you do have to leave.
Settling down isn’t what you want.
He wondered why he was having to work so hard to convince himself.
“Merci, Bébé. Now, I want you to know that you are beautiful, you are clever, and you are special.”
She smiled before a soft snore escaped her.
Hmm. And she thought he snored?