Chapter 26
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
ELLIOT
M y plane leaves in a couple of days. I should be getting ready. Instead, I’m heading to Fern’s place. According to Lulu, Fern has been sick.
Why didn’t she call me?
Does her family know she’s unwell?
Doubtful. She doesn’t like to worry them. If she had called me, I could’ve been taking care of her. That’s why she was at the doctor’s office, wasn’t it?
She claimed to be okay. I’m upset she lied to me. She couldn’t trust me for one second. I… how do I convince her that I care about her without coming on too strong?
I bet she’s hiding her illness from her family until she’s better. Then, she’ll tell them that she’s doing exceptionally well and there wasn’t any point in upsetting them. Can I call Blaire and reschedule…?
No, I can’t. She needs someone to lead the construction of a hospital. I can’t just bail because a friend of mine needs me. That’s selfish.
But this isn’t a friend. It’s Fern.
Fern, the woman I can’t stop thinking about and I want to get to know better.
Learn every smile, every frown, every sound she makes.
If I see her today, I might not be able to stay away from her.
Any excuse will be good enough to cancel the next fifty years of my life and stay with her. Even a hangnail.
Okay, I can figure out what to do once I learn what’s happening with her. I ring the bell and hope that she opens the door. It only takes a couple of seconds before I hear her say, “Coming.”
And fuck if I don’t sigh with relief when I hear her voice.
The moment she opens the door, the entire world brightens, except for her face. She frowns when she sees it’s me. “Oh, it’s you.”
I try not to take that personally and say, “I heard you’re sick. Is there something I can do for you?”
Her lips press together tightly while she studies me. After a long moment she says, “No. I’m not sick.”
I look at her, and she looks radiant and beautiful as always. “Are you sure?”
She nods. “Yes, but please come on in. You might be saving me the trip.”
“Me?” I ask as I follow her but not before shutting the door.
When we reach the living room, she grabs a manila envelope from the coffee table and hands it to me. “I meant to call, but I wasn’t sure when to do it. In fact, I was debating about doing it before you left or maybe once you were back. It’s not important—at least not for you.”
I stare at the envelope, quirking an eyebrow as I study her. “Why do I feel like you’re serving me with legal papers? Is this because you’re going to pay me for what North Bay has done for the foundation?”
She smiles but doesn’t laugh at my bad joke. “No. It’s something completely different. That can wait until later.”
Translation: I’ll fix it, so you don’t have to bother. This is my problem, not yours.
Staring at the papers I say, “I’m glad I came today, or you wouldn’t have been able to reach me for two years.” And maybe I’d be fucking mad at her for keeping me out of the loop.
She clears her throat. “Before you open it, I want you to know that I have no idea how it happened, but it did. I don’t expect anything from you, which is why I had my lawyer draw up the paperwork?—”
I glare at her. This sounds serious, and she’s too nervous. “What are you talking about?”
“I’m pregnant,” she mumbles.
The word is hard to process. Pregnant.
It resonates inside my head.
Pregnant.
Pregnant.
Pregnant.
Instead of asking questions, I open the manila envelope and scan the papers. I’ve seen so many contracts in my lifetime that I know what words to look for and what clauses matter the most. My jaw and chest tighten.
“What the fuck, Fern? You debated between telling me today and two years from now that I’m going to be a father?”
I stare at her dumbfounded. “Not only that. You want me to rescind my parental rights of—” I look at the papers again to see if she knows if we’re having a boy or a girl. Instead, I see something that pushes the knife even deeper. “You’re having triplets?”
“To be determined.”
If I thought things couldn’t get weirder, she just proved me wrong. “How is that possible?”
“Well, we had sex?—”
“I get that part,” I interrupt her. “How can you not be sure about how many children we’re having?”
“There are three sacs, but they need another sonogram. Around the tenth to twelfth week of gestation they can confirm if there’s more than one embryo.”
“ We are having a baby,” I repeat, upset but happy and confused.
Fuck, I’m going to be a father.
When I look at Fern staring at me, I get even more confused. What am I supposed to say? This is so unexpected. “I…”
“Listen, I know this is something you’d never want, and I don’t want to impose at all. You’re free to sign those papers and walk out of the house. You’ll never hear from us again.”
Her voice is almost apologetic, as if she’s inconveniencing me just by giving me this news. And of course, I’m free to leave because that’ll make it easier for her. “You think I’ll give up my children?”
“We know that you don’t want any.”
That’s what I’ve been saying all along, but is it true? When I look at her, I know that I wouldn’t mind having a family with her. “When I saw you at North Bay, that’s the news you were trying to digest, isn’t it?”
She nods. That’s the day I told her I didn’t want a family or children. Of course, it was the worst moment to open my mouth. I probably hurt her.
“It’s okay. You don’t have to be responsible for them. I promise they’ll be fine. I’m capable.”
“You can do it all by yourself, and God forbid anyone gives a shit about you, but… You are not alone.”
She gives me a sad smile. “But I am, and that’s okay.”
“Because you like to push people away, which is something I’m not going to discuss. I…” I stare at the papers. “I’ll stay.”
“No. You have a responsibility to Carter Kid’s Foundation.”
She’s right, but I can send other people to do my work. Blaire will understand if I explain to her that I had to find last-minute replacements. “This is a family emergency.”
“You have a family emergency?”
“I’m talking about us. You’re pregnant with our children. I’m not just going to take off. You need me around.”
“No, I don’t.”
She’s so infuriating and stubborn and… beautiful. I don’t think this is the right moment to tell her how I feel about her. We’ll focus on the babies and her health first. We have a lifetime to define our future and our happiness.
“Who’s helping you with the foundation?”
She sighs. “I’ll deal with it later.”
“You’re growing three kids inside you. If not for you, do it for them. They need you to rest, eat well, and prepare to welcome them into the world.”
“How do you know?”
“I’ve been a brother and an uncle for longer than I’ve been an adult. I dealt with late nights, dirty diapers, and hourly feedings.”
She gives me a disapproving glare. “On top of all the work you had to do? No wonder you’re burned out by life and work.”
“My past isn’t the point of this conversation.”
“But it is. The story of your life is to do what you think is right.” Her voice is almost loud. “Ever since you were a child, you have sacrificed everything for others. You’re finally living for yourself, doing what you love, and I won’t allow you to stop just because you think this…”
She touches her belly. “This isn’t your responsibility, Elliot. You’ve told me several times how you feel about marriage, children, and family. Why make this a chore? They’ll have plenty of people who’ll love them.”
I blink twice. Fern is right. I don’t see myself in a house, taking care of three children and worrying about… All I worry about is her and the next time I’m going to be able to see her again.
That’s been my main concern for the past weeks, maybe months.
How am I going to live so far away and not see her again?
This scenario, where she’s expecting my babies and we’re together, calms my heart and the anxiety I’ve been carrying for so long.
I can picture her lounging in the backyard of our home, reading a book while I’m chasing three little toddlers around. Teaching them how to surf. It’s the first time in a long time that I can see a future.
A future with her.
How do I explain to her that for the last few weeks… no, the past few months, she’s been part of those moments that can change the direction of somebody’s life?
In this case, my life and my future.
“Sign the papers and let’s get this over with,” she suggests.
She’s a pain in the ass, and during the next few months, I’m going to figure out what broke her while making her fall in love with me.
“So, what are you going to do when the kids ask for their father?” I poke holes in her plan.
“I haven’t thought that far yet.” Her instincts kick in.
She has to solve another problem. Oh, I can throw her so many problems that she’ll be so busy for the next eighteen years coming up with solutions that she won’t realize we’re raising a family and falling madly in love with each other.
“It’ll happen sooner than you predict. They’ll need a father figure.”
“My brothers can fill that gap.” She takes a step back. I’m too close. She needs distance between us.
“What are you afraid of?”
She wrinkles her nose. “Me?”
“You want me out of your life without giving me a chance because you’re afraid.” I almost groan but manage to keep a steady voice. “What can I do to convince you that I’m willing to stay? To love you and my family?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Let me prove that I can be a good father.”
“I don’t want the kids to get used to you, learn to adore you, and never see you again because you grew tired of them.”
That’s a valid fear, but I have the feeling that she’s afraid of being hurt too.
What if I do something stupid, like make her fall in love with me and leave her heartbroken?
There’s a story behind this protection. I understand why she’s not only safeguarding the babies but also her heart.
I want to find out who hurt her and tend to that wound. It’s too deep.
“You have valid points, Fern. However, if they’re like you, I’m sure it’ll be too hard to grow tired of them. I might just love them.”
“What does that mean?”
I lift my hand and caress her cheek. “You keep me wanting to come back.”
“I’m still confused.”
Carefully, I put the papers back into the envelope and set them on the coffee table. “We’re going to forget about these and work on building a family.”
“How do we do that? Are you going to propose? Because I’m not marrying you.”
“No one is proposing. We can be parents without a marriage license.”
She sighs with relief.
She will be a hard nut to crack, but I have plenty of time to show her that we can be together. I’m not changing for her. I’m coming back because of her.
She’s been teaching my heart how to trust again, maybe how to love.
We’re not that different from each other. We’re afraid to let someone into our lives, but we want to love. I know because I’ve felt her need so deep that she made me fall in love with her. Can I do the same for her?