Chapter 19
Audrey
I composed a text to Ash as soon as I got a minute to myself. I was sitting on the toilet with the lid down. I had already finished in there, but I was taking an extra minute to send Ash a text since I hadn't been able to talk to him much after the show or at dinner.
Me:
Hey! Gosh, Ash, I can't believe you came to my show!
James's mom didn't come, and she lives in Laurel.
I feel so loved. My mom, too! That was a shock.
She's in there making cookies with Lu, which is also a shock.
Life is funny. I miss you. Can I see you tonight, maybe?
Mom and Lu will be in bed by ten, and Josie said she'll listen out for Lu if I want to sneak out and go party, lol.
No, really, I would love to see you if you can.
Sorry, I know it's a weird time to make plans. LMK what you think.
It was probably too long a text, but I sent it. I thought I had played it sufficiently cool. I felt anxious to see him.
"Mom! Where is my magic quarter trick? I want to show Grandma Ann!" I heard Lu yell through the door.
My text notification dinged when Luna hollered, and I didn't even look down to read it before answering. I had my eyes closed, trying to remember where I had seen that quarter.
"Check in that little drawer in the red thing at the end of the hallway—where the envelopes and stamps are. Otherwise, look in your room."
I almost added that I had told her a million times to put all that stuff in one place, but I didn't say that.
"Okay!" she said, taking off with the pitter-patter of feet down the hall. I looked at my phone and smiled when I read what was on the screen.
Ash:
I will pick you up at ten to go party.
I felt a rush of panic.
Me:
I was joking. I'm good with just chillin.
Ash:
I figured. I was messing with you. Nothing to do at ten on Sunday in Billings anyway.
Me:
I missed you.
I felt a wave of butterflies when I sent it.
Ash:
You have no idea. I can't wait to see you. Be there soon.
Me:
I'll meet you outside.
I put my phone in my pocket and headed back into my living room. It was only 8pm, and I needed to calm down.
Luna zoomed by me.
"Did you find your quarter trick?"
"Yes, it's right here," she said, running.
"Be carefulll!" I called.
I went back into the living room with my family. My mom was sweeter and more tenderhearted than she usually was with me. I wasn't sure what could have caused the change. Maybe she loved Broadway musicals.
Either way, she was warm and nostalgic, and the four of us girls had a great time, making cookies and playing Pass the Pigs.
Several times, it was on the tip of my tongue to tell Mom and Lu that I was going out with Ash tonight, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it.
I knew he was happy to see me, and I knew he had cut his short trip for me, but I still had a hard time believing it was solid enough to tell other people.
Josie knew Ash had gone to great lengths to be at the show, and she saw the beautiful flowers.
She knew he was more special to me than I was letting on.
I was thinking of these things as I showered.
It was nine-thirty by the time I got Luna in bed and told my mom goodnight, and I went straight to the shower.
It was the first time for me to stand under hot water all day, and it was actually glorious.
My hair and makeup were plastered for the stage, and it felt amazing to wash it all off.
Sweat, foundation, hairspray, and who knows what else washed off of me and down the drain, and I felt like a new woman when I got out.
The only problem was that I only had ten minutes to finish getting ready.
I towel-dried my hair.
Scented lotion.
Deodorant.
Brush teeth.
Comb hair and scrunch it.
Socks, underwear, jeans, sweater.
Dry hair for 2 minutes.
Lip gloss.
Mascara.
I barely had time to give myself a once-over in the mirror before my phone dinged with a text. It was Ash, and I could not hold back a smile.
Ash:
I'm out front.
Me:
Coming 1 min.
My mom was nowhere to be seen when I went into the living room, but Josie was out there.
She told me that she was just going to sleep on my couch instead of with our mom in the guest bedroom.
She already had a pillow and blanket, and I told her goodnight and thanks for listening out for Luna.
I put on a knitted stocking hat on my way out since it was cold and my hair was still wet.
I walked out of my front door and down the sidewalk to the place where Ash was parked.
This was a thrill I had felt before, running out to meet him on the street.
I felt like I wanted to giggle as I jogged the rest of the way to his truck. He was leaned over, opening the door for me, and I grinned at the sight of him and said, "Hey!"
"Get in here," he said.
"I'm coming," I said, groaning at how quickly I tried to get in and close the door.
I threw myself at Ash. The center console of the truck might as well have not existed.
I went all the way across the truck to him, and he caught me and pulled me into his arms. He reached down and pushed his seat back, adjusting and holding me comfortably on his lap.
My body was absolutely buzzing at the fact that I was finally being held by Ash.
"I'm sorry, I probably should have held your hand or something first, but I just… I needed you."
I wasn't sure why I was being so forward, or raw, or honest. None of this was like me.
I had a rein on my instincts and emotions, and I knew better than to throw myself at anyone.
I had utterly hurled myself at Ash Adams, and gloriously, he was there to catch me.
He held me tightly, seeming relieved that I had done it.
My face was resting on his chest, up near his neck, and he held me near.
"I needed you too, Audrey. I missed you so much.
I'm not looking forward to going back there to film.
I mean, I am. I like working with Luke, it's going to be good.
I'm just not looking forward to missing you again.
I wish you and Lu could move down there.
I know it's impossible with the restaurant, I'm just already dreading missing you again. "
He held me tightly, and I felt a zapping electric feeling as a result of his words and his embrace.
"I'm right here now, though."
"Yes, and you were so good today."
"It's James and Meredith, Allie and them who have the hard roles. But thank you. I had fun, and I felt good about it. And I can't believe you came back."
"Could you see me in the audience?"
"Yes, but I didn't look," I admitted. "I saw enough to know you were there, and then I kind of blocked it out."
"Were you nervous? You didn't look nervous at all."
"I felt, for the last week, like I feel right now." I motioned to my chest. "My heart's just beating so fast that it’s a buzzing feeling. It's not nerves, it's different. It's like this underlying layer of adrenaline, excitement, buzzing, all sorts of things."
He wrapped his arms around me and held me tightly.
We stayed like that for a minute, and then I took a second to take off my hat and readjust, but we just went right back to holding each other.
Both of us were so relieved to be there that we stayed quiet and still in each other's arms for what must've been five full minutes after I adjusted.
Finally, I pulled back.
Ash.
Goodness.
He was a beautiful man, and I felt my eyes sting when I took in the sight of him at such close range. I blinked, smiling. I reached up and touched the side of his face. It was surreal having him next to me.
"Please don't do that again," he said.
"You have to in October, but it'll be okay. It'll go by fast."
"No, not that. I'm talking about the show."
"You don't want me to do another show?" I asked, pulling back and honestly perplexed.
He grinned and shook his head, letting out a sigh. He glanced at me with those sparkling eyes. He was an absolute vision—the best looking man I'd ever seen.
"It's not that," he said. "You were great, and I was proud of you. Just please never look that good again in a costume," he said, making a little face that made me smile.
"The fishnets were a bit much, but those jail girls always wear stuff like that in the show."
"It's not that I'm trying to control what you wear.
Well, I guess it is. You can do what you want.
It would just be wonderful for me if you were fully covered up all the time—with a sign that said reserved for Ash Adams." He smiled again and bit his lip.
"Ultimately, it's your choice, and the only reason I care is that you're sooo freakinggg beautifullll.
" He said that last phrase in a moan and buried his face near mine, causing me to giggle.
"What did your parents think?"
"They loved it. My mom told my dad they need to see more theater."
"What do they think about us?"
"They're happy."
"No, like, what do they think is going on? You told them we were talking? I mean, I guess they saw you give me flowers."
"They know you're my girlfriend, Audrey."
"What?" My stomach dropped.
"I told them. I made plans to come back early for you. I had to. Does your family not know? I'm sure they've figured it out."
"Not that I'm your… I barely know that."
"What do you mean? Do you like somebody else?" he asked, looking genuinely confused.
"No. Goodness. I'm just, it's just that—was your mom okay with—did she know about Luna?"
He pulled me closer and smelled my neck before letting out a little moan and then kissing my cheek, twice. "Of course she knows about Luna, Audrey. She's met her twice."
"What did she say?"
"She said a lot. I've told her a lot about Lu, and you, and your life."
"That makes me so nervous."
"About what?"
"Rejection," I said.
"If you were rejected, she wouldn't have been at the play or at dinner. She's the one who bought the tickets. She had to get them through a reseller."
I took in a breath, not even telling him what a gigantic relief that felt like to me. He put his face near my neck.
"I can't get close enough," he said, gripping onto me with his big arms.
"You can't get any closer. I'm on your lap. I need to hear about Hollywood."
"It was good. I want to go back there with you and Lu this summer. Just for a few days. Judd's got plenty of room. You could see Josie and Alex. I want to show you the house where we'll be shooting the movie. Why are you closing your eyes?"
"I'm concentrating on your voice," I said. "It sounds different in person than on the phone."
"Keep them closed," he said, causing me to open them immediately.
He made a face at me, and I laughed and closed them again.
"I’m sorry, but when you say to keep them closed, it makes me curio—" I couldn’t finish the word, because his mouth was on mine.
He just put it there, unmoving, his lips touching mine.
I kissed him first. I moved, touching his mouth slowly, softly.
Our touch was torturously light. Ash let me lead the kiss.
He sat there with me on his lap, sweetly responding to me but never pushing the pace.
We were in his truck until almost eleven, and then we went into my restaurant and shared a midnight snack. I didn't have to work in the morning, but he did, and I had told Josie I would be back at midnight.
He parked in front of my house at 11:58.
"Okay, my mystery Cinderella, I got you back before midnight, just like you said."
I smiled and put on my hat. "Lu's got school in the morning, and I'll be in the restaurant even though I'm technically not working.
"You don't have to cook for me again, but if that's what you're offering, yes, please. What time do you want me there?"
I grinned. "Any time after eight-thirty."
"Yes. I'll be there."
"Thank you, Ash," I said, leaning over to give him a quick kiss.
"Thank you," he said.
"Night," I said.
I leaned over to open the door. "Night, love you," he said at my back.
He was casual and cool when he said it, and my body reacted. I felt a jolting, electric feeling, and a bit like I wanted to cry.
"Night, love you too," I said quickly while I was in motion. I stared back at him for a second once I got out. I waved at him and smiled and closed the door. I was trying to be so cool, and on the inside, I was melting like a pool of warm honey.
I would see him again in the morning. It had been a month since the last time, and now I was seeing him two days in a row.
Seeing Ash daily would be an easy habit to form.
He had said he loved me, and I had said it back. Both of us were unflinching.
I texted him when I got inside.
We ended up talking on the phone until 2am.