Chapter 9
Olive
Ineed a few moments to myself after the interaction with Nate.
It’s disconcerting how desperately I want to confide in him.
Tell him about the texts from Benny and about the frantic calls I had to make after.
The sleepless hours of crying and stressing about the reality that haunts me—by not looking at my phone earlier, I could have been too late to help my brother when he needed me.
But I couldn’t. Nate wanted me to confide in him about simple things, like a hangover or a broken heart, not my entire world blowing up yet again.
He acted like he really wanted to know, but I’ve been down this road before, and men like him quickly realize that being with someone who has the problems I do is much less knight in shining armor than they thought it would be.
The emotions from last night are still too raw.
If Cade hadn’t been there, I don’t know how I would’ve gotten back to the hotel.
He walked me to my room and asked if I wanted him to stay with me.
I didn’t—not because I didn’t appreciate his support, but because I needed to handle this alone.
It was already too many emotions to deal with Benny, so adding having to worry about what my best friend thought about me and my brother when we were both at our rawest was too much for me.
Once in the privacy of my room, I continued to call my brother and his sponsor, James, repeatedly. In between the calls, I started looking up flights home, when James called me.
He explained that Benny had called him after I didn’t answer his texts.
James went over to our apartment, picked up my brother, and brought him back to his house for the night.
James was going to watch over him and make sure he didn’t do anything.
Then, if Benny agreed, James was going to take him to an outpatient facility in the morning.
When I finally spoke with him, Benny assured me that he didn’t do anything and that he wanted to stay sober. He just had a rough night and felt himself slipping back into the headspace that made drugs feel like the best coping mechanism.
I told him last night, but I hope he knows how proud I am of him for reaching out to James and me. I offered to come home multiple times in our short conversation, but he kept telling me that wouldn’t solve anything and that I needed to work.
My heart hurts just recalling that conversation. I spent the whole night alternating between restless sleep and crying. It’s no surprise I overslept. I inhale a shaky breath and let it out slowly. And now I have a job to do, and I don’t have the time to lose it again.
I lift my chin high and put on my best, carefree face, even if it feels forced. Taking another deep breath, I open the lavatory door and walk back to the galley, where Cade is prepping food and drinks.
“You good, boo?” he asks as he continues plating the meals.
I give him a small smile. “Yeah, sorry about that.”
Shaking his head, he returns my smile. His is a little more genuine than mine.
“You don’t need to apologize. I know how hard last night had to have been.
” He glances into the cabin at the small group of passengers before returning to his task.
“I’m not butting in, but that hunk of a man seems unusually interested in you. ”
“I told you yesterday, that’s very unlikely. Besides, even if he is, that would all change when he realizes what he’s signing up for.”
Cade sends me a pitying stare, making me even more sad. “I know you’ve been with some dicks in the past, but I hope you don’t write off men forever just because of Benny. You’re a fucking catch.”
I laugh humorlessly. “I appreciate that, Cade. I’ll try not to. Just feels like a lot after last night.”
He stares at me for a heartbeat before deciding to accept my answer. “I guess I can’t blame you for that, lovey.” Pushing the cart toward me, he says, “Let’s go drop off this before that grumpy, stuck-up singer complains again. She’s in a mood today.”
As I push the cart down the aisle, I steel myself to deal with Jenny and to face Nate again. I start at the back and serve Jenny and her entourage food. Ignoring the glare she hurls in my direction, I hold my breath as I set her plate down. I’m relieved when all she says is an annoyed, “Finally.”
Walking backward up the aisle, I stop to serve Nate and Ian. They switched seats since I last saw them, so Ian is nearest the aisle, with Nate next to the window.
I avoid Nate’s eyes, even though I can feel his bore into the side of my head as I lean over and place his plate on the small table in front of them.
“Olive, you smell amazing. I love your perfume.”
I’m caught off guard by the compliment from the man closest to me.
I straighten and smile at Ian. As I sit his plate down in front of him, I don’t really know how to respond, so I say, “Thank you, it’s probably my shampoo.
” I immediately mentally kick myself. He doesn’t care.
I should have just said thanks and left it at that.
“Wow, shampoo that smells that good and gives you gorgeous hair like that. Must be good stuff,” Ian compliments with a huge smile as he takes a bite of his food.
I’m unprepared for Nate’s intensity when I notice him staring at his friend, his mouth hanging open slightly. He looks utterly shocked and somewhat pissed.
“Dude, what the fuck?” Nate says quietly enough that only Ian and I can hear him.
Ian glances at his friend with a slight shrug, a wide smile locked in place. “What? You know it’s true.”
Nate doesn’t look up at me. He turns to his plate and aggressively plucks his fork off the tray. Keeping his stare locked on his food, he mumbles, “Of course I do, but you don’t get to say that to her, you fucker.”
My cheeks flare when Ian barks a laugh as he winks in my direction. He slaps his friend on the shoulder the way guys do. “Whatever you say, buddy.”
I chance one last glance at Nate before I leave them. He’s watching me cautiously, a small smile playing on his lips, and exhilaration flashes through my body.
Even as I battle with the urge to shut down any further advances from him for fear of being hurt again, there’s no denying the look on his face warms my heart. Returning his smile is impossible to resist.