29. Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Nila
“Hey ladies! Good to see you,” Garrett says as Brittany and I take a seat across the table from him. I was surprised by the random lunch invitation, but honestly, I was more surprised by the fact he asked me to bring Brittany.
I know the two of them hit it off at the Gala, but I did not expect this.
“Good to see you again,” Brittany says, smoothing out her hair.
“I’m really glad you could join us, Brittany.” Garrett’s eyes linger on her face.
Why do I suddenly feel like a third wheel ?
“Thanks.” She blushes as she says the word. “I was honored to be invited to lunch.”
“Well, honestly...” Garrett’s voice trails off as he holds her gaze. “You’re the main reason I asked for lunch.”
You’ve got to be kidding me.
I’m happy for Brittany—really, I am. But I was not expecting this to go this way. I figured this lunch would involve business talk. I could’ve just set the two of them up and found something else to do.
“That’s seriously so sweet.” Brittany beams.
I gaze down at my phone, the screen lighting up my entire purse. I’ve been trying not to obsess over my phone so much, but considering how awkward I feel right now, I decide to pull it out and scroll through the missed notifications as a distraction. My heart skips a beat when I see a notification I missed from last night.
Cameron Hastens liked your post.
My mouth grows dry and my knee starts to bounce as I swipe to open it—to see what picture he could’ve possibly liked on my page. My phone pulls up the Gala post and I frown.
Why would he like that?
I want to send him a text or ask how he’s been.
But they have a game tonight—or maybe it’s tomorrow?
Ugh. I can’t remember .
“What’re you looking at?” Brittany’s question catches me off guard. However, I realize my phone is now right in front of my face—like blocking my entire head.
“Oh, it’s nothing,” I say quickly, my cheeks flaming as I set it down.
“Wait, is Nila Christianson blushing right now?” Brittany’s brow raises. “Because I don’t think I’ve ever seen you blush. What was it?” She gives me that you-better-tell-me look.
“It’s really nothing,” I urge, because really, it’s nothing. “Someone liked my post, and I ... I don’t know. I had a funny reaction because I didn’t think they were keeping up with me anymore.”
“Was it Cameron?” she demands, sitting up a little straighter. She knows all the details now, and I’m glad she does.
But bringing it up right now?
No, I wish she would not talk about that in front of my current client.
“Cameron Hastens?” Garrett muses from across the table. “Did the two of you have something?”
“Oh yeah, they totally did,” Brittany tells him before I even have time to try to play it off. “It was so romantic, too. But she ended it because she wanted to focus on her career.”
“Okay, that’s enough,” I interrupt, feeling heat rise to my cheeks. “It’s really not a big deal,” I brush it off, hoping Brittany takes the hint.
She doesn’t .
“Nila’s totally in love with him,” she gushes as I just about fall out of my chair.
“What?” I gape. “What makes you think—”
“Oh c’mon. It’s obvious in everything you do. I can’t even count the number of times I’ve seen you creep on him or read articles about the team. I’m not that oblivious, Nila.”
Garrett watches the exchange with keen interest, his eyes flickering between Brittany and me, as if he’s trying to piece together the puzzle pieces.
Meanwhile, I am mortified and want to crawl into a hole and never come out.
“So ... you went to Colorado with Cameron Hastens and then fell for the guy?” Garrett clarifies, an inquisitive look on his face.
I swallow hard, hoping this doesn’t mess up my professionalism. “I mean, that’s not entirely how it went, but yeah, kind of.”
“That’s sweet,” he comments, his face softening. “I have to say, I didn’t peg you to be the kind of woman who would fall for a client, but you know, when it’s there, it’s there.”
Brittany lets out a sigh. “I totally agree. Sometimes there’s nothing you can do about attraction. If the spark is there, just enjoy it.”
My eyes drop to my phone. As embarrassed as I am by the fact Brittany spilled my personal life to a client, I’m also touched that someone has actually paid this much attention to me .
Before meeting Cameron, the only person who knew me like this was my gran.
But now ... now that I’ve reconnected with Brittany, I’ve really grown to like having someone who knows me and can offer more perspective about my life.
It’s nice.
“And did you enjoy it?” Garrett snaps me out of my thoughts. His tone is friendly as he picks up his water to take a sip. “I hope you did.”
“I ... I kind of did. Actually, I really did,” I confess. “But there was no way it would have lasted outside of Colorado. I’m not looking to get into a relationship right now, nor am I a fan of long-distance. My career has been my sole focus, and getting involved with someone would be a distraction.” As the words come out, I’m not so sure I believe them anymore.
“I get that.” Garrett nods. “It’s important to prioritize what matters most to you.”
Oof.
His words hit me like a ton of bricks.
I’m not even sure what matters most to me anymore.
For the past several years, I’ve always said it was my career, but … lately, my career hasn’t been bringing me the sense of purpose and satisfaction it once did. If I’m being honest with myself, it kind of feels empty…
I’ve been married to my career for so long now that I almost forgot how much my heart wants to be loved in return.
Spending all that time with Cameron—witnessing how he fiercely loves, protects, and cares for his family and friends—reminded me that there’s so much more to life than just work. Not only that, but he helped me realize it’s okay to open up to people. It’s okay to be vulnerable. It’s okay to let people in. And honestly, I’m tired of pushing everyone away.
I want true friends.
I want true love.
I want a family of my own.
I know Gran wants that for me, too.
I take a moment to gather my thoughts, the weight of my realizations settling in. It feels strange discussing everything this openly, but I’m really trying to be more willing to share—more willing to let my guard down for people.
Garrett’s gaze is gentle, understanding, and I find comfort in that. It’s strange how a lunch meeting turned into a soul-searching session, but maybe it’s exactly what I needed.
“And no judgment at all,” he continues. “I’ve had to make similar decisions myself over the years. Some worked out and some didn’t. But we learn from them.”
“Well, considering you have a billion-dollar company, you’re clearly doing something right.” I laugh.
“Maybe. But my business decisions have also led to so many rumors that have impacted my personal life. The biggest one being that, because I work with a lot of women in the industry, I must be a huge player. Which couldn’t be further from the truth. I just find women are easier to work with because men have such a pride problem. Unfortunately, because of this reputation, I have a hard time meeting women who are serious about settling down and starting a family ... like I want to be.” He eyes Brittany as he says the words, and I can’t help but steal a glance at her.
Her eyes are wide, but so is the smile on her face. “My ex broke up with me because I wanted to settle down and have kids, but he didn’t.”
Match made in heaven.
I nearly giggle at the two of them, and then flip my phone over. I keep hoping there’ll be a text or a call—something more from Cameron—but there’s nothing.
“Stop checking that thing,” Brittany says gently, her hand squeezing my arm. “It’s not going to change anything. You broke up with him. If you want things to change, you have to do it.”
“I didn’t break up with him,” I say flatly. “We weren’t even together.”
“You get what I’m saying.”
“She has a point,” Garrett agrees, shrugging his shoulders. “If you’re the heartbreaker, you typically have to be the one who makes the grand gesture.”
I tilt my head in confusion. “The ... what? ”
“You know, the grand gesture . ” Garrett laughs. “C’mon, you must’ve watched some chick flicks in your life. It’s the moment where the one who broke the other’s heart—or whatever—shows back up in a big way to make it up to them. It’s usually something crazy and outlandish.”
“Oh! Oh! You could do an ice-skating routine for him!” Brittany offers up. “To a love song.”
“I can’t even ice skate. And I don’t think that’d really do it for him, anyway.” I try to imagine what Cameron’s reaction would be to me acting out that way ... and all I can picture is him cringing.
“But you do admit you’re thinking about it?” Garrett smirks, exchanging a look with Brittany.
It suddenly feels like the two of them are ganging up on me—and I’m not so sure I like it.
“I don’t know,” I say flatly.
“Well, I’ll just give you one piece of advice.” Garrett clears his throat, leaning his elbow against the table. “Having a successful career is really great—and on some level, it’s fulfilling. It’s nice to see how far we’ve come from where we started. The applause feels good. People respect us and talk about how talented and intelligent we are, but...”
“But what?”
“But at the end of the day, we go home alone. There’s no one there to greet us. There are no kids playing in the yard. I don’t know about you, but my house is uninviting, so I spend all my free time at the gym or working. What happens when the work is over? What happens when I retire and there’s no more work to be done?”
His question rings in my head, taking up all the space I have left.
“That’s a lot.” Brittany clears her throat. “Maybe let’s not overwhelm her with all of this. Everyone has different perspectives, and some people really like their life the way it is. She has friends and—”
“Brittany,” I interject, giving her a smile. “I appreciate you taking up for me the way you have, but the truth is ... he’s right. I love my career and I love what I do, but I do have a void in my personal life. And as much as I hate to admit it, it’s self-inflicted. When I lost my gran, the pain was simply too much. I became so scared to lose someone again that I pushed everyone away and buried even my deepest desires of getting married and having a family along with her. After that, I just couldn’t connect with anyone. I ended up putting all my energy into my career because it was safe and then proceeded to spend my life on the screen, appearing like I had friends.”
“But you did have friends…” Brittany looks confused. “We’ve been friends.”
“Yeah, but I kept you and everyone else at arm’s length, always assuming they had some ulterior motive, while maintaining a facade that everything was great on social media. The reality is I’ve never been more lonely. And I guess it took everything that happened between Cameron and me to finally realize that I really do crave to be loved— romantically. For the first time since losing my gran, I crave connection … in all the ways.”
“I feel like I’m witnessing an epiphany,” Brittany says, a smile pulling at her lips. “Does this mean you’re going to do the grand gesture for Cameron?”
I purse my lips, mulling it over in my head. “I don’t know. I don’t even know if he’d want me at his game. He unfollowed me and all that.”
“But he just liked your post,” Garrett points out. “So, if he unfollowed you, that means that he searched you out and liked the post. My guess is that he unfollowed you so he wouldn’t have to see you thriving without him…”
“It’s true.” Brittany nods along in agreement. “I’ve unfollowed people for that exact reason. It can be hard to see them move on and be happy when you’re still hung up on them. I don’t imagine that Cameron has just magically moved on. That’s not how love works.”
“Not all the time,” Garrett adds, his voice growing with excitement. “Look up when the game is. We can all go. It’ll be fun.”
“You mean, it’ll be fun to watch me embarrass myself.”
“How so? We’re there for moral support,” Brittany emphasizes, picking up her glass of water and taking a sip. “I think it’d be good for you to be surrounded by your friends.”
“Yeah ... but...” I glance over to Garrett, who’s watching Brittany carefully as she takes a drink of water. The man eats her up like she’s a goddess or something. It’s entertaining, and the more I watch them together, the more I realize that Cameron looked at me the same way...
Ugh.
I need to make things right.
Will he forgive me?
What if it’s too late?
“Maybe I should call him first,” I say, picking up my phone. “That would probably be the best way to ensure I don’t embarrass myself.”
“No,” Garrett and Brittany say in unison.
“You have to surprise him,” she adds. “And I think it’d be even more romantic if you did something at the game...”
“I agree. But when is the game?” I shrug, picking up my phone and making my way to Google. I type in the question and hit the enter button, waiting for the response.
My heart drops as I read the date.
“What?” Brittany urges as she sits on the edge of her seat.
I let out a big sigh, my gaze jumping between both of them. “It’s tonight . I have no idea how I could make it. There’s not going to be a single flight that’ll land in time.” Defeat rattles my chest.
“I’m sorry,” Brittany sympathizes.
I glance over to Garrett, who’s since gone quiet.
And he’s grinning.