Chapter 7
TYLER
I look up and find Denny passed out. There was no mistaking how exhausted he appeared when he answered the door. I don’t think he’s slept much since he brought the baby home.
The baby named Tyler.
What did you do, Sally? I think, trying to keep my tears in. You named your kid after me!
I brush my fingers softly over little Tyler’s forehead. You made a perfect little human, sister.
Looking up, I examine Denny. I’ve seen him on television and on social media a lot. I’ve always followed hockey, but since Sally told me they were pregnant and getting married, I might have started internet stalking him. It became necessary when she was so… silent concerning him.
She didn’t avoid conversation, but… when you’re with someone, you naturally spend time together.
You talk. You share experiences and make memories.
There was none of that with Sally. When I’d bring him up, she would answer whatever questions I had.
To me, it always sounded like this was just some guy.
A one-night stand. Not someone she was building a family with.
So I had to do my own sleuthing. Which means I’m well acquainted with online Denny.
I didn’t expect him to be so… hot. In person, he’s not the same man on the screen.
He’s so much more. Taller. Shirtless. Muscley.
His pants hang low on his hips. I’m not entirely sure he’s wearing anything under them.
With as low as they clung, I should have seen underwear.
I’m not drooling over Sally’s fiancé and my nephew’s father. That would be wildly inappropriate. I’m just… admiring.
An unmistakable smell grips my lungs, and I nearly gag. Ew. I look down at little Tyler with a bemused look. “Had to wait until Daddy fell asleep to fill your diaper, did you?”
I don’t want to overstep, but it’s clear that Denny is fucking beat. It feels inconsiderate and rude to wake him up just to change the baby’s diaper.
“Let’s go on an adventure,” I whisper. “We’ll go find your room and get you into clean britches, eh?”
Being as quiet as I can, I get to my feet but leave my phone where Denny can see it if he wakes up. I don’t want him to freak out if he opens his eyes and doesn’t see us.
On the first floor, I find a bathroom, a room that’s fighting to be a hockey memorabilia room and office, and what is unmistakably the primary bedroom. Modern homes aren’t built for single-floor living. I’m not entirely surprised.
I find the stairs and head up where there are three more bedrooms, bathrooms, a wide-open media lounge space, and… still no nursery. No baby things anywhere. The rooms are clearly not lived in. Apparently, I missed something.
Heading back downstairs, I wander around the first floor, finding the kitchen, formal dining, another living area, and a laundry room. Stairs that go into the basement. I don’t bother exploring down there since I can’t imagine he put the nursery in the basement when he has four spare bedrooms.
Maybe I missed something. I peek into the primary room as I had been standing in Sally’s door and look for anything that could belong to little Tyler. But I see nothing.
So I head for the second room and am relieved that I missed something. I’m not going to pretend it’s an overwhelming mountain of baby things. There’s a diaper bag on the bed, piles of clothes and baby blankets, miscellaneous baby things, and diapers.
At least I found the diapers.
I bring Tyler to the bed, and as I think most babies do, he cries as I change him. He also pees as soon as I pull his diaper back, and I nearly dive off the bed so he doesn’t pee on me. I give him a playful glare. “Seriously? That’s how we’re going to bond right off the bat, huh?”
Because he’s now peed all over himself, I wash him a little more thoroughly once I get a clean diaper on him and change him into what I think is a clean one-piece. Then I wrap him in a burrito before picking him up again.
Since he just emptied himself, he must have found room for more.
He’s rooting like a little puppy. At least I’m relatively certain that I’ll find something to feed him in the kitchen.
I’m thankful that there are bags of milk in the fridge since I can’t make sense of all the different formulas that are laid out all over the kitchen.
This would be easier with two hands, I muse. It takes me far longer than it should to find a bottle, fill it without making a mess everywhere, learn how to use the contraption to heat the bottle, and then return to the living room.
Ty is fussing now. Hungry. Probably. As soon as I get him settled with his bottle, he calms right down. He blinks a few times, and I smile.
“You’re perfect, Ty,” I whisper.
Ty. No one has ever called me Ty. So there won’t be any confusion if I call him Ty.
While he drinks, I alternate my attention between Ty feeding and Denny sleeping. His lips are parted, but he’s not snorting. His head is lolled to the side, long hair in disarray around his head. There are a few strands covering his right eye.
He’s got muscles for fucking days. My hands itch to touch them. Trace the veins in his thick arms.
Mmm.
I shake my head. No. Not going to admire my nephew’s daddy. I force my attention back to Ty and watch him for several minutes before my eyes drift back to Denny, and I frown.
Weird. Sally has always had a particular type, and Denny doesn’t really fit into it.
She has never been interested in all those muscles.
I’ve never once known her to take any interest in an athlete.
In fact, when we watch hockey, I’m always commenting on the dirty way they stretch, and while she agrees that it’s filthy and absolutely a thirst trap, that’s as far as her interest goes.
If anything, Denny is my type. He’s literally the epitome of my type.
Is this why you didn’t talk about him? I muse. Did Sally think I’d be jealous? Or upset? Or maybe she wasn’t attracted to him, but then why sleep with him?
He must have a sparkling personality.
The thought makes me snort, and I look down at Ty. Just a few more swallows and he’s finished his bottle. Gently, I pull it from him and then adjust him so I can burp him. He’s now milk drunk and sleepy, so he makes no noise at all.
It takes me quite a few minutes to coax any burps from him, and there’s minimal spit up, which pleases me since that means he got a full serving of milk. He’s already asleep, so I adjust him in my arms to snuggle him.
There’s something healing about having him so close. Cuddling him. Knowing that this is my sister’s little baby, who she barely got a chance to know. She lived long enough to name him before she was ripped from the world.
My eyes sting again, and I take deep breaths through my mouth to try to calm the sudden rush of emotion. It’s not fair. Sally was so excited to be a mother. She was ecstatic about bringing this little one into the world.
At least I have this little piece of Sally. Not that I’m sure Denny will allow me to stay in his life. I hope he will. He didn’t exactly agree when I asked. We were interrupted by Ty crying.
I adjust on the couch so I can lie down and bring Ty onto my chest. I fix his burrito wrap a bit and then close my eyes. When I open them, I’m staring at Denny.
So many questions left unanswered. So, so many. Sally has never kept so many secrets from me, and I don’t understand all the little things I see now. Putting all the pieces together that don’t line up.
But why? What sense am I supposed to make of this?
I’ve thought since the moment that Sally told me she was expecting and they were getting married that she wasn’t all that excited about Denny. My suspicion grew as the months drew on and she rarely brought him up.
Then why agree? Just to raise Ty in a ‘proper’ home? I don’t think that’s the reason. I can’t believe that’s the reason. That doesn’t sound like my sister at all.
But then why? Why sleep with a man I can never imagine you being attracted to?
Okay, that might be the easiest answer to guess.
I’ve known Denny for a total of like three sentences.
But maybe she was attracted to him. More than anything, Sally loves when a guy can make her laugh.
Maybe Denny isn’t physically the type of guy she goes for, but perhaps his personality is.
Okay, I’m going to call that mystery solved.
The pregnancy was an accident. Understood. I’m not in the least bit surprised that she was excited to keep it and the future it promised. I’m not surprised that she told him about the pregnancy because that’s not something that she would ever keep a secret.
Everything after that makes zero sense, and I can’t figure out why she kept it all so hush. Right up to refusing to tell me Ty’s name when she called me from the hospital. It’s a sweet surprise, and I love it, but…
There’s so much mystery left behind, and she’s not here to make all the pieces make sense.
Sighing, I close my eyes again and rest my hand on Ty’s back. Feeling the way he breathes. In a way, I can feel Sally’s heartbeat. As if she were still here. She lives on inside her son.
My eyes open again just as Denny jerks upright. He looks mildly disoriented before his attention lands on me. Confusion and then relief. I wouldn’t go so far as to say he recognizes me. We’ve barely just met.
He rubs his face, but it does nothing to wash away his obvious exhaustion.
“Sorry,” Denny says. “Didn’t mean to fall asleep.”
“It’s okay. You can go back to sleep. I don’t mind.”
He shakes his head. “That’s okay. You don’t have to babysit him.”
“I’m not babysitting. I’m bonding with my nephew.”
Denny studies me. His shoulders sag.
“I changed him and fed him. Now he’s sleepy. It’s a perfect time to sleep or whatever you need to do. We’re really okay for a while. I promise I won’t go anywhere. You can even have the keys to the car,” I offer.
He doesn’t answer. There’s a very loud, very clear struggle being waged on his face.
“No offense, but you look like you’ve been run over by a truck. Not just once, but it backed up and rolled over you at least six more times.”
Denny snorts.
“Go to sleep. I swear, I won’t go anywhere, and I’ll take good care of Ty.”
His chest grows as he inhales deeply. Jesus. I have to look away before my body reacts entirely inappropriately for the situation. Big, big chest. Pert nipples. God, he’s fucking hot.
Nice job, Sally, I muse.
“Yeah, okay,” Denny says. “You’re sure?”
“I found the diapers and the bottles. We’re good.”
He nods and gets to his feet. “Wake me if you… need anything.”
“Sure.”
Even though he’s standing, he doesn’t move. His gaze is locked on Ty. I know the second it moves to me, though. Not just because I’m watching him, but I swear, my entire body feels the moment our eyes lock.
“Thanks,” he says quietly.
I lick my lips and nod. “I want to spend time with him. All the time. As much as you’ll allow. Please believe me when I tell you this isn’t a hardship.”
I catch my first glimpse of a smile. Nothing big. It’s barely there. I’m not even going to go so far as to say it’s happy. Maybe… relieved? Pleased with my declaration?
“I’m just… right down the hall.”
“Okay.” I don’t offer that I snooped around looking for a nursery that apparently doesn’t exist. Instead, I watch him go and from behind…
fuck. I didn’t think there’d be a better view than the front, but then you look at the back.
I’m both a nipple man and a back man. There’s little hotter than a sexy back.
When I’m sure he’s gone and can’t hear me, I whisper, “Ty, your daddy is probably one of the hottest men I’ve ever seen in real life. You’re going to have to get used to watching women drool over him.” I pause and then add, “And men.”
Including your uncle. Uncle Tyler is going to drool over him often. As often as he’ll allow me to be here with my little baby nephew.
Maybe he’ll let me move in so I can be here every single day for all of Ty’s life.
At least until he’s eighteen or until he moves out and begins his own life.
I want to see it all. I want to be here for it all.
I want him to know his mother, and I’m not convinced that Denny will be able to tell Ty about Sally.
I can. I want to tell him everything. I want to make sure Ty knows how much Sally loved him, and she never chose to leave him like this.
Once again, I have to focus on my breaths as the emotions well so suddenly in my chest that my sinuses instantly become congested in preparation for tears.
“We’ll create a little family,” I promise Ty. “It might not be what you were supposed to have, but I’ll do my best to make sure it’s still perfect for you. I’ll make sure you know Mommy is here every single day, even if not… uh… in person, I guess.”
We won’t forget your Momma.
I’m just going to need to convince Denny that he needs me around. I can help. I’ll be useful. He can trust me. If I can convince him of that, then maybe he’ll let me see my nephew every single day.
That’s my goal now. Maybe I’m already getting somewhere since I convinced him that he can go take a nap while I take care of Ty. That’s a start. It’s also a big success. He trusts me as Sally’s brother. As Ty’s uncle. We’re already getting somewhere.
I may not understand what my sister had planned here, but I’m going to need to interpret it and redesign it now that she’s left me with a lot of questions and nowhere to find the answers.