Chapter 43
The urge to see him is a physical thing now. I want to tell him I read every word, that I never thought I’d want someone like him, and now I can’t imagine waking up alone.
As if summoned, the door swings open with all the delicacy of a SWAT raid.
And Colton stands in the doorway, arms full of coffee cups and a muffin tray.
He stops when he sees me, eyes wide, and for a second, he looks terrified.
He sets the food down on the nearest flat surface and just…
stands there, like he can’t quite trust what he’s seeing.
I want to say something profound. Maybe, “Hey, tough guy,” or “Took you long enough.” But I can’t. I just manage a hoarse, “Hi.”
He’s across the room in two strides but refuses to touch me right away, as if he’s afraid I’ll break. “I can’t believe it. You are awake.”
I nod, which is all I can do, and suddenly his big bear hands are cradling my face, careful not to mess up the IVs or the EKG leads.
His eyes are red-rimmed and frantic, and I realize—maybe for the first time—that this giant, terrifying man is just as breakable as I am. And shit, my eyes burn too.
“Don’t cry,” he says, and it’s so useless, so perfectly him, that I laugh and cry at the same time.
“Fuck, Solnyshko. I love you so much. Do you hear me?” he says and I nod.
“I am so sorry for what I said. Or what I didn’t say.
I love you. I don’t want to spend a second without you.
I love all of you. Your imperfections, your flaws, your freckles, your laughter, your heartbeat, your scent, your hobbies, your…
” he clears his throat and a tear runs down his cheek.
“Your everything. Do you hear me? It was always you. Even in high school. I was just an idiot who couldn’t place one thought right.
I loved you when you sent me your little insulting letters.
I loved you when I saw you in court. I loved you as my lawyer, as my fake wife, as my real wife.
And I will never ever let you go again. I will now tell you every day that I love you because there won’t be a day where you even doubt it ever again for one single beat of your heart. ”
I’m still crying. It’s like all I can do.
I cry because everything hurts.
I cry because his ex wanted to kill me.
I cry because he loves me.
Truly loves me.
“Colton, I love you too,” I whisper, even though I want to shout it at him.
He looks at me like I’ve handed him the Stanley Cup.
“Will you stay married to me forever, Jenna?” he says with tears in his eyes.
“Yes. Yes to forever.”
So, this is how love truly feels.