Chapter 19 Diem
Diem
Diem
“Oh, fuck no. No, no, no.” Darcy retreated, stumbling over his flapping running shoe, eyes blown wide. “Why is he phoning?”
I caught the front of Darcy’s jacket so he couldn’t get away and darted my attention from the ringing phone to Tallus. That was a very good fucking question. Luke calling was not part of the plan, and letting Darcy talk to the guy could be disastrous. We had not planned for this contingency.
Tallus, who had always had an uncanny ability to read my mind, grimaced. “You don’t have a choice, D.”
“We didn’t plan for this.”
“He’ll be fine.”
“No I won’t.” Darcy tried to wrench free from my hold, but I wouldn’t let go. “I don’t know what to say. I’ll mess it up.”
I handed the phone to Tallus and took Darcy by the shoulders, giving him a light shake so he’d pay attention.
I peered into his wild blue eyes. “Relax, kid. You can do this. No big deal. Stick to the story we talked about. You have money and don’t know what to do with it.
Simple as that. You appreciate the work he gives you, so you wanted to do the honest thing. I’ll be right here.”
My pep talk seemed to calm him a fraction, so I kept hold of Darcy, grounding him in the moment, as I spoke to Tallus. “Connect it and put it on speaker.”
The ringing stopped, and Tallus held the phone closer to Darcy. I didn’t break eye contact, giving the kid as much support as possible as he stammered, “H-hello?”
“Hello, Mr. Gingrick. I wasn’t sure you were going to answer.”
“I… I’m not used to you calling.”
“Well, your text was quite unusual. I wanted to follow up.”
“C-cool. Yeah, um. Yeah. So, like, Gabr… I mean, G, g-gave me a ton of cash in an envelope to, like, take to the b-bank for her. I was gonna keep it until I saw how much it was. I’m sorry I peeked.
I know that was wrong, but… That’s why I texted.
Should I d-deposit it like she said? I didn’t think you’d want me to.
Not with what we’re, like, doing. You’ve been good to me.
Giving me jobs and such. Helping me out.
I… I just thought… Well, that’s why I asked. ”
“I see.”
Sweat glistened along Darcy’s forehead and wet the fuzz on his upper lip.
His frantic gaze begged me to save him. His thumb rolled along the center portion of the ring over and over.
I offered a reassuring nod. When he abandoned the ring and reached out to cling to the edge of my trench coat, I let him.
I’d never been someone’s rock, and it was an odd sensation, but the kid needed me.
“Am I in trouble, Mr. Luke, sir?” he asked.
Luke tsked. “No, myshka. You’re not in trouble. I’m glad you reached out.”
Darcy’s trembling worsened with every passing second. I squeezed his shoulders, wanting to tell him he was doing great, but I couldn’t reveal myself.
Echo, recognizing the intensity and stress of the situation, came up beside me and chuffed a question, making those dog noises she used when checking to see if I was okay.
I released Darcy long enough to ruffle her ear and silently let her know I was fine. She sat watchfully but didn’t vocalize again.
“Is that a dog I hear?” Luke asked.
“Y-yes. Um… My roommate has a friend over. It’s their d-dog.”
Luke hummed. “How much money has our dear Gabriella entrusted you with?”
“T-two thousand?”
I winced at the uptick in Darcy’s voice. He’d turned what should have been a statement into a question, and Luke heard it too.
A long pause ensued. “You don’t sound sure.”
Darcy was about to speak when Tallus waved for him to stop and gestured at the ceiling with his pointer finger, indicating he should raise the sum.
I didn’t think Darcy would understand, but he instantly held up three fingers and peered questioningly at Tallus.
Tallus held up three fingers but bent the third in half at the knuckle.
Darcy nodded and meekly replied, “T-two and a half, sir.”
“Ah. Not as honest as you claim, are you?”
“I’m s-sorry. I shouldn’t have lied.”
“It’s okay, myshka. I forgive you, and I will reward your honesty. Not many of my helpers would bother contacting me over such business. They would keep the money for themselves. But not you.”
“No, sir.”
“Here’s what you’re going to do. Keep five hundred. For your honesty. Not a penny more, you understand?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Take the rest to Grinders. Tonight. You remember the café, of course?”
“On Lake Shore.”
“Good. They close at eight. Olenka is working. I’ll contact her so she knows to expect you. Same order. Any questions?”
“No.”
“You did well, myshka.” The line went dead, and the tension in the room broke.
Darcy looked ready to puke or fall to his knees, so I dragged him in for a sideways hug and ruffled his hair. “Good job, brat. Fucking brilliant. You were amazing.”
Darcy’s reluctant smile suggested he wasn’t expecting praise. Even Tallus looked impressed.
“Do you know where we’re going?” I asked.
Darcy nodded, pushing from my hold, and explained that it was the same place Luke did all his monetary exchanges. Although not the same café where they had met in person, it was within the same vicinity, located off Lake Shore Boulevard West.
Tallus drove the Jetta, and I took Darcy and Echo in the Jeep.
After mapping out the neighborhood, we planned to meet in the parking lot of a Korean restaurant across the street.
I wanted to scope the joint and determine the best places for surveillance before sending Darcy in with a padded envelope.
It all seemed to be unfolding as we hoped, but I needed to be sure this Luke asshole wasn’t skulking about with plans to confront Darcy.
“Are you nervous?” I asked the kid as I parked in an available spot at the restaurant, aiming the nose of the Jeep so it faced the street and the strip mall on the other side.
“Yes.”
“Don’t be. He didn’t sound suspicious.”
“Until he discovers it’s a hoax and comes after me. He knows where I live.”
“You aren’t going back there, and by the time he realizes he’s been duped, you’ll be safely away.”
Darcy scanned the street and rotated the center of the fidget ring with a flick of his thumb, again and again and again. “What if he’s camped out waiting for me?”
“Tallus and I will both watch for suspicious activity. Trust me. I’m good at what I do.”
“You promise I won’t get hurt?”
“I promise.”
Darcy studied me for a long time, like he wasn’t sure he could believe me. How many people had let him down in life? Boy, I knew what that was like.
“How come you’re not a cop anymore?”
I shifted in my seat, scanned the street in both directions, and rubbed a hand over my roughly stubbled jaw.
Tallus hadn’t arrived. Where the fuck was he?
I would have loved avoiding the question, but like the previous night, opening up to Darcy didn’t feel as hard as it did with other people.
Uncomfortable, yes, but on some level, I felt like I was proving to him that your past didn’t have to define you.
I was nobody’s role model, but maybe I could pass along a few lessons, so he didn’t make the same mistakes.
“I have anger issues. In those days, I didn’t control my emotions very well. Got my ass in trouble a lot. I quit before they could fire me.”
“Oh.” The heat of his attention stripped me raw. I stared ahead, waiting for the Jetta to appear so we could move on with our night.
My father spent years beating emotions out of me until all that was left was anger.
At myself. At the world. At everyone who didn’t understand.
My therapist taught me how to cope with the shattered remains of my childhood, but it was Tallus who helped me discover that happiness was a thing I could feel. A thing I deserved.
Streetlights shone in puddles on the asphalt. Cars zipped by in both directions. A hazy, muddy-orange ceiling hung above the city, a cloud of smog and light pollution. Not a star to be seen.
I thought of fishing on a quiet lake, far from civilization.
I thought of fresh air and sunshine on my face.
Solitude.
Peace.
No pressure.
A man who called me son.
“Are you better now?” The question came out tentatively.
I was about to say no. It was instinctual. Reflexive. But it wasn’t true. Years of therapy and a shit load of determination had taken me farther than I ever thought possible. I wasn’t the same person I was ten years ago. Hell, I wasn’t the same person as I was two years ago.
I slowly nodded. “I’m getting there. One day at a time, kid. That’s all you can do. No sense living in the past, but honestly, I have a long way to go yet.”
“Because of your dad?”
A lump formed in my throat. “I don’t want to talk about him.”
“Okay.”
Darcy bounced a knee, and when Echo poked her head between the seats, he moved to pet her but stopped, likely recalling my earlier warning that Echo was working and he could only pet her when she didn’t have her vest on.
I nuzzled Echo and told her to lie down, that Tallus would be there soon. She obeyed without hesitation.
Darcy turned around in his seat to look at her. “She’s good at listening.”
“She’s well trained. Went to special puppy school.”
“Why do you have a support dog?”
“PTSD. I have a hair-trigger temper, and I’m prone to panic attacks. She keeps an eye on me, reminds me to breathe.”
“Isn’t PTSD a war thing? Did you serve?”
“No. It can arise from experiencing any sort of trauma. In my case, a childhood of severe abuse and neglect.”
“Oh.” Darcy seemed to know better than to bring up my father again, but I sensed him examining the scars on my face and my disfigured ear. “That sucks.”
“Yeah. Understatement of the century.”
“My dad’s a drunk, but he never hit me. He liked to yell a lot. Break stuff. Mom’s a wino, at least, that’s what she became after Dad got locked up. I was an oops baby. She reminded me every time she drank too much.”
I wasn’t good with words, but I nodded, acknowledging his share, recognizing his need to relate. A fucking drunk and a wino. An oops baby. No wonder the kid was a mess.