Chapter Thirteen #3
“I understand that now,” I say, my voice cracking on the last word. “But at the time, all I heard was you saying that bonding someone would be the worst thing that could happen. And I couldn’t make myself be the one to tell you it already had.”
Hongjoong’s expression doesn’t soften. “You’re an idiot,” he says flatly.
“Maybe,” I agree, because I can’t argue with it.
He moves, crossing the remaining distance between us and crouching down in front of me so we’re eye level, his knees on the floor, his face inches from mine.
His fingers catch my chin and tip it up, forcing me to meet his gaze when I try to look away, and his eyes are so close I can see the gold flecks in the brown, the fine lines at the corners that weren’t there when we were young.
“You should have known me better than that,” he says, but there’s no anger in his voice now, just a quiet and bruised note that makes my chest ache.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, and my voice breaks properly this time, splintering at the seams. “I’m so sorry, Hongjoong.”
He holds my gaze for a long moment, his thumb pressing into the soft underside of my chin, and then he nods once, a small tight motion.
“I know you are. And you’re going to work on making it up to me.
” His thumb traces along my jaw and drops away.
“Starting now. Take your clothes off and get on all fours.”
I stand and pull my shirt over my head, folding it once out of habit before setting it on the nightstand.
My pants follow, pushed down my hips and stepped out of carefully, the plug inside me shifting with every movement and sending dull sparks of sensation through my already oversensitive body.
I’m naked and goosebumped in the cool air of the bedroom and I can feel Hongjoong’s eyes tracking every inch of exposed skin as I climb onto the bed and lower myself to my hands and knees, turning my ass toward him, the flared base of the plug visible between my cheeks.
“Now let’s see if you’ve been a good little omega,” Hongjoong says from behind me, and I hear the rustle of him pulling his shirt off, the clink of his belt. “Take the plug out and show me how well you’ve kept that hole all filled up for me.”
My face burns. I reach back with one hand and grip the base of the plug, my fingers slipping slightly against the silicone, and pull.
My body resists, the suction fierce after hours of being plugged, my hole clenching desperately around the widest part as it drags against my swollen rim, and I have to grit my teeth and pull harder, a low grunt escaping me as the bulb stretches me open on its way out.
The plug comes free with a wet squelching sound that makes me want to bury my face in the mattress and never come up, and immediately the cum that’s been trapped inside me all day starts to pour out in a thick warm rush, spilling down my taint and over my balls, dripping onto the sheets below me in heavy drops as my hole gapes and clenches helplessly, too wrecked and swollen to close properly.
Hongjoong swears behind me, a low appreciative curse that I feel more than hear.
My cock twitches between my legs despite the humiliation flooding my face with heat.
He moves forward and takes the plug from my trembling hand, and then his other hand grips my jaw and turns my face to the side.
He holds the plug in front of my mouth, the silicone coated in a thick glistening layer of cum and slick.
“Open.”
I open my mouth and Hongjoong pushes the plug past my lips, the rounded end pressing down on my tongue, and the taste floods in immediately, bitter salt and musk and the sweeter undertone of my own slick, all of it mixed together into something that makes my stomach flip and my cock leak onto the sheets below me.
My lips close around the silicone and I hold it there, jaw stretched around the girth, saliva pooling.
“Hold it there until I’m done,” Hongjoong says, releasing my jaw. “And it better be clean when I take it out.”
I nod around the plug, my breath coming in short huffs through my nose, and brace myself on my hands as I feel Hongjoong move into position behind me.
The blunt head of his cock presses against my gaping hole and then he pushes in, sliding through the cum still inside me with a filthy wet sound that fills the quiet bedroom, and I bite down on the plug as a moan vibrates through the silicone, muffled and desperate.
Even after everything he’s done to me, the feeling of Hongjoong filling me up is still devastating, still makes my whole body light up and clench around him like it’s trying to keep him there forever.
He starts to move, his hips rolling in deep, grinding thrusts.
His hands roam over my body, leaving nothing untouched.
His fingers find my nipples and pinch, twisting until they’re peaked and aching and I’m whimpering around the plug, then slide lower, one hand wrapping around my cock and stroking through the precum dripping from the tip while the other cups my balls and rolls them in his palm, squeezing gently.
He touches me everywhere, his hands tracing my ribs and my stomach and the dip of my waist, gripping my hips hard enough to bruise and then smoothing over the marks with his thumbs, possessive and punishing and thorough all at the same time.
I come with the plug still clenched between my teeth, my moan trapped and muffled, my cock pulsing in Hongjoong’s fist as my hole spasms around him.
Hongjoong grunts behind me and drives in deep, his hips stuttering as his knot starts to swell, the base of his cock thickening and stretching my wrecked hole wider and wider until it catches and locks with a pressure that makes my vision blur, and then he’s coming inside me in hot waves, filling me up on top of everything already in there, so much that my belly cramps and I let out a broken sound around the plug that’s half sob and half moan.
I hold myself up on shaking arms for what feels like an eternity, my jaw aching fiercely around the plug, drool sliding down my chin and dripping onto the pillow, until Hongjoong’s knot finally deflates enough for him to pull free.
He reaches around and hooks a finger into the corner of my mouth, easing the plug out carefully, a string of saliva stretching between my lips and the silicone before it breaks.
He turns the plug in his fingers, examining it in the lamplight, and nods once with visible satisfaction when he confirms I’ve licked it clean.
I gasp sharply as he pushes the plug back into my hole without any warning, the stretch forcing a hiss through my clenched teeth as my freshly fucked rim opens around the widest point, burning and stinging, and then closes around the narrower neck as the plug seats itself deep inside me again, trapping everything, sealing me shut.
“I know you’re sorry,” Hongjoong says, his voice has lost some of its hard edge, sounding quieter now.
“And I think I can forgive you. Eventually. But I need this right now, Jae.” He pats the base of the plug firmly, and I jolt, a sound leaking out of me that I can’t control.
“The alpha part of me needs your surrender. Needs to soothe instincts that have been driving me mad for years without knowing why.”
He pats the plug again, lighter this time, and I feel the vibration of it travel all the way through my core. “You’re going to keep this in for a few days.”
I sit up slowly, sniffling, wiping my chin with the back of my hand, and stare at him in open disbelief. “A few days? Hongjoong, my ass is going to break.”
“Don’t be dramatic,” he says, and there’s the faintest ghost of his old smirk at the corner of his mouth, barely there but unmistakable. “I need my cum to stay inside you. I need the deep claiming. I need to know that every moment of every day you’re walking around full of me.”
I open my mouth to argue further and then close it, because the look in his eyes tells me this isn’t negotiable and honestly, I’m too tired and too wrung out and too emotionally gutted to fight him on it. “Whatever,” I mutter, dropping my gaze, the word comes out more defeated than dismissive.
Hongjoong pulls me against his chest, both arms wrapping around me from behind, and presses his nose into my hair, inhaling deep.
His thumb finds the fresh bite mark on my collarbone, the scabbing wound still tender and hot to the touch, and he rubs over it gently, carefully, the pad of his thumb tracing the edges in slow circles that make the bond hum between us like a plucked string.
“I hope you understand,” he says quietly against the top of my head, his breath warm in my hair, “that I’m never letting you out of my sight again.”
I bring my hands up and curl my fingers around his forearms where they cross over my chest, holding on, feeling the steady beat of his pulse under my fingertips. “I know,” I say, my voice is hoarse and small but steady.
In my head, pressed against the warmth of the alpha who has always been mine, even when I was too afraid and too stupid to claim him back, I think that I’m not going to try to run again either. I’m done running. I’ve been done for a long time. I just didn’t know how to stop until someone caught me.