Chapter 9
Teagan
“Pregnant?” I chuckle because I’m positive I misheard her somehow. “Did you mix up my chart with another patient’s?”
“We’re waiting for your bloodwork to confirm it, but the test came back positive. You’re pregnant, Teagan.”
I’m…pregnant? How? I threw up a few times this week after eating that bad salmon from this weekend, and I felt a little tired, but I’ve been staying after work to do my training and teaching kids all day doesn’t help either.
But I haven’t had sex since Baseball Guy and we used protection.
“We used a condom, and I was getting the shot,” I mumble to myself.
“Condoms aren’t foolproof. There are instances where they break. And the shot is only effective when taken on time,” she explains softly.
Shit. I was supposed to call for an appointment and get my shot after the competition, but because of everything that happened, I forgot all about it.
Sensing my panic, she places a hand over my shoulder. “Teagan, I can tell this wasn’t something you’d planned, so know that I’m here for you. There are options…”
The rest of her words drift off as I try to process what she just told me. My lungs tighten as the news sinks in and the room feels smaller than it did before.
I place a hand over my flat stomach. I’d never thought about having children.
I’ve always been focused on my career and didn’t think that far ahead.
To be honest, I didn’t think I’d ever settle down and have a family of my own.
I kind of always thought I’d work in gymnastics once I actually retire, and do life all by myself.
I never imagined a partner because why give someone else the power to walk away from me?
Growing up, I thought that a family is one with two loving parents whose world centers around their kids.
At least that’s the version we’re shown by the media.
But it’s not always the case. My dad wanted no part in knowing me, while my mom preferred traveling around the world instead of raising her kids.
While my grams and pops might not have been my biological parents, they did their best to make it feel like it and raised me and my brother with so much love.
They proved to me that family doesn’t have to look a certain way; it’s about the feeling.
And with them, I felt loved, supported, and cared for.
No matter how much of a troublemaker I was, they never gave up on me.
Life threw them off the path they thought they were on, and instead, found themselves much happier than they were before. And maybe this is my detour to something better.
There are a million things running through my mind, but one sticks out the most. While this may not be the life I originally planned for myself, I want this baby. I want to be the best parent I can possibly be because maybe this is my chance to experience what that’s like.
An image of Baseball Guy pops into my mind, making my heart beat rapidly at the fact that I’m going to have to track him down and tell him. What if I tell him and he wants no part of it? What if he wants this? What if I can’t ever get ahold of him?
“Teagan?” Dr. Caruso pulls me out of my thoughts.
“I want to move forward with the pregnancy.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I want this baby.”
“All right then, when was your last period?” Dr. Caruso asks, typing on her computer. She asks me a few more standard questions before she instructs me to lie on the bed.
I do as told and watch her wheel over the sonograph. Nerves rattle my body, but also excitement at the fact that I’ll be seeing my baby on that screen soon.
I lift my shirt, and she squirts a small amount of gel onto the probe. She then presses the probe and moves it around my belly. My entire body is tense as I wait for something to happen, and then it does.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
Tears spring to my eyes as it fully hits me that I’m having a baby. Don’t get me wrong. I’m fucking terrified. There’s so much I need to learn, to do, and figure out. But for right now, I’m focusing on the fact that I have someone to take care of.
Someone who needs me.
After I get cleaned up, I exit the room with the sonogram in my purse and an appointment scheduled in a few weeks from now. Once inside my car, I grab one of the pamphlets Dr. Caruso gave me where it showcases pregnancy by the months.
It compares each month’s size of the baby to a fruit, along with some things to expect at this milestone. My eyes land on the blueberries representing the two-month section as Dr. Caruso told me that’s how far along I am.
I place my hands on my stomach, and think to myself, So you’re a blueberry, huh?
“Hi, blueberry,” I whisper.
There might be a lot of unknowns right now, especially with figuring out how to contact Baseball Guy to let him know he might be a dad, and how to tell my brother so that he won’t lose his mind.
Inside the car, I turn down the music and breathe deeply as I rest my head back on the headrest.
I’m going to have a baby in seven months, a tiny human to take care of. My family.
I need to call my brother.
He’s the only family I have left, and the only person I want to tell right now. I’m nervous to tell him because I know he’s overprotective and is going to have a million questions I don’t want to answer. But I know at the end of the day, he’s going to support me no matter what.
So, with a deep breath, I grab my phone from my purse and call him, not thinking twice about the fact that he could be busy right now.
It rings once, and then he answers with, “Hey, what’s up?”
The background of his end of the call is loud, so I ask, “Is now a good time to talk?”
“I pitched today, and we won. I’m in the locker room,” he explains.
“That’s great news. I’ll let you go then—”
“No, it’s fine. I can tell something’s wrong. What is it?” he presses, having that uncanny sibling ability to know when something is off without me even saying it.
“I have something to tell you, and I need you to be understanding. It’s a surprise for me and I need your support,” I plead. While I know he will support me in the end, it’s the freak-out that I know will come first that I’m worried about.
He sighs before he replies, “You have my support always. What’s going on?”
Taking a deep breath, I close my eyes and scrunch my face as I say, “I’m pregnant.”
For a moment, there’s silence, save for the chatter in the locker room, until he shouts, “You’re pregnant?”
“Remember about two seconds ago when you said you’d be understanding?” I remind him.
“Jen, be serious. This isn’t a prank?” Ian questions, sounding shocked. “What about your—”
“Don’t even say my job. I’m fine to teach. I’m not on my death bed. I called you because you’re the only family I have left, and I need you,” I admit, my voice cracking as fear settles in.
There’s so much I don’t know and so much to do, it’s overwhelming and terrifying.
“I’ll help you with whatever you need, but let’s talk some more after, okay?” he replies, his tone softening.
“Call me later. Love you.” My throat wobbles at knowing that I have someone in my corner in this.
“Yeah, okay, bye, love you,” he replies, then hangs up the phone.
A single tear rolls down my cheek, but I quickly swipe it away. I don’t have time to get emotional right now. What I need to do is tell my best friends and figure out a way to contact Baseball Guy.
Then maybe I can cry a little. But for now, I’ll push through like I always do.