Chapter 31
How in the hell had he fucked up so badly? Trevor wondered as he signaled for the bartender as he leaned against the mahogany bar.
It was that damn arrangement.
Of all the fucked-up things he’d done in his life, he wished that he could go back and change that night. He’d probably already been half in love with the stubborn woman by the time he’d come up with that asinine idea. What in the hell was wrong with him suggesting something like that?
If his mother was still alive, she’d bitch-slap him into tomorrow for pulling that shit.
She’d raised him to respect women even if he didn’t particularly care for them and his uncles backed up that lesson with the unspoken promise of an ass whooping if he ever forgot.
Before Zoe came into his life, there had been no question that he’d been an asshole, still was, but he’d never treated any of the women in his life the way he’d treated her like she was nothing but a scratch to itch.
The fucked up part about the whole thing was that the only woman he’d ever truly cared about and loved was the one he’d treated like she didn’t exist while he’d paraded women around who he couldn’t have given a flying fuck about just because of the way they’d looked.
He let out a humorless snort of laughter at that.
Most of the women he’d dated in the past had annoyed the shit out of him and could never manage to keep his attention, but his frumpy little tenant had him practically drooling after her twenty-four/seven.
He was so fucking in love with her that he felt sick and empty when she wasn’t around and so unbelievably happy when he saw her that he couldn’t believe his own stupidity.
This was all his fault. If he could go back and change things, he would.
Instead of offering sex like he was doing her a favor, he should have done what any normal man would do for the woman that he couldn’t stop thinking about and asked her out, begged if he had to.
He loved spending time with her and could easily think of a thousand things he’d like to do with her, but he’d been so stupid and selfish.
If only he could go back and change things...
Well, he wouldn’t change the pregnancy. It had only been a day since he’d found out about it, but already he was excited about the future.
It didn’t matter to him if their baby had reading problems like him, he’d be there for his kid and support him.
Of course, he’d teach his kid how to beat the shit out of anyone that made fun of him.
Jason’s kids would probably be insanely smart and hopefully, they’d be there for Trevor’s kid the way that Jason had been there for him.
He hoped his child didn’t have an obsession with food, but judging by the way Zoe was devouring her burger, he figured that wish was useless. Wait a minute...
Hadn’t Zoe ordered baked ziti for herself? He sighed heavily as he gestured for the busy bartender once again. Well, it looked like he was going to go hungry for the next six or seven months, which was fine with him. As long Zoe and his baby were happy, then he’d learn to deal.
But she certainly didn’t look happy, not the way she had when he’d showed up at their bedroom door with flowers.
She’d looked so heartbreakingly beautiful with that little shy smile.
It didn’t hurt that her outfit highlighted all of his favorite curves.
He’d had to stop himself from grabbing her and showing her how much he liked what he saw and remind himself that they had a date.
A date that was not going very well, which again, was all his fault.
If he hadn’t gone out of his way to ignore her and try to keep her at arm’s length, he wouldn’t be in this mess right now.
She didn’t believe that he loved her or wanted her, which now, that he thought about it was pretty fucking stupid.
How the hell could she not see that he was in love with her?
Had he dated or shown any interest in any women since they came together?
No. He’d been faithful to her even if she hadn’t expected it.
He’d also spent every free second of his time with her and came up with a million excuses just to be near her.
Hell, he even told the woman that he loved her, Trevor thought, getting angry over all the bullshit.
“What can I get you?” the bartender asked when he finally came over.
“All set,” Trevor said instead of ordering the apple juice that Zoe had asked him to get just to get him to leave the table because of everyone who wouldn’t take a fucking hint and leave him alone or because she was a sneaky little food thief, he didn’t know.
Right now, he also didn’t care. They had some things to settle and they were damn well going to settle them now.
“Why the hell did you just brush me off like that?” Hank demanded, stepping in his path and blocking him from his goal.
“Because I was busy just like now,” Trevor said, moving to step around the man only to find himself blocked again. Why hadn’t he told this douchebag off years ago? He couldn’t stand the prick on a good day and today was definitely not a good day.
“I don’t understand your problem,” Hank said, shoving his fingers through his overly gelled hair.
“Every time I offer to do you a favor by introducing you to some really hot women, you blow me off. Maybe instead of acting like an asshole, you could show me some appreciation, quit busting my balls, and come meet some of these women,” he said, raising his voice with every word so that everyone around them could hear, including Zoe.
He didn’t need this asshole making things more difficult, and to be honest, and really when was he not honest with himself? he was sick and tired of dealing with him.
“My problem is that you can’t take a fucking hint.
I have no interest in being your wingman.
Unlike you, I don’t need help to get laid.
Now get the fuck out of my way. I have something a hell of a lot more important to do than stand here and deal with your bullshit,” Trevor said, shouldering his way past the man as he headed towards Zoe, who looked a little nervous.
Good.
He wanted her nervous because that meant she was no longer sure that he was playing around.
By the time he was through with her, she was going to know exactly how much he loved and adored her.
Hell, by the end of the night, he fully expected her to apologize for ever doubting him, accompanied, of course, with one of her delicious sandwiches, otherwise the apology didn’t count. Then, he would-
“Maybe if you weren’t so busy sniffing around some fat, ugly bitch you wouldn’t need my help,” Hank announced smugly as he gave Trevor’s shoulder a good shove.
The first punch had been automatic and so quick that he hadn’t really had much time to think about it. By the fifth punch, Trevor wasn’t thinking about anything else but killing the bastard.
“Don’t you ever call her that again!” Trevor shouted, following the bastard to the floor with a wild punch as he shrugged off several guys trying to pull him off the sobbing man.
“Stop!” Zoe cried as she latched onto his arm just as he pulled it back to let it go flying again. “Please, stop!”
Somehow, he managed to stop, but just barely.
Panting heavily, Trevor stood up and took Zoe’s trembling hand in his.
After one last glare at the man cowering on the floor, he pulled Zoe behind him, dropping enough money on the table to cover their tab and headed for the door.
He wasn’t too surprised when he found Jeff, the manager, waiting for him.
“You’re banned,” Jeff informed him as if he really gave a damn.
With a curt nod, Trevor continued out the door, dragging Zoe with him. He wanted to go back in there and beat the shit out of Hank until he passed out and then do it again when the son of a bitch came to.
“Trevor? Please slow down,” Zoe pleaded, sounding out of breath.
Instead of slowing down, he scooped her up in his arms and headed towards his truck at the same clipped pace. There was no way that he could slow down right now because if he did, he really wasn’t sure what he would do at the moment and that actually scared him.
“Give me the keys, Zoe,” Trevor said in a deceptively calm voice, but she wasn’t buying it.
She’d honestly never seen anyone look so angry before in her life and with her big mouth, she’d pissed off a lot of people.
If she hadn’t seen him in action not even five minutes ago, she would think that she was overreacting, but she had seen him and there was no way that she was letting him get behind the wheel of a truck while he was acting like this.
“No,” Zoe said, shaking her head firmly as she backed up tightly against the passenger door of the truck’s cab. “I’ll drive,” she offered, hoping that he’d take her up on her offer so that they could go home and calm down.
“I’m fine, Zoe. Give me my keys,” Trevor bit out as he reached over to snag the keys away from her, but before he could grab them, she moved her hand behind her back to get them out of his reach.
“Let me drive so that you can calm down,” Zoe said, looking around the almost pitch-black parking lot and wishing that there was someone around to talk some sense into him.
“I don’t need to calm down, Zoe, I just need my goddamn keys so that I can bring you home,” Trevor said, moving closer and she was half thinking about opening her door and making a run for it so that she could call Jason or Jared and have them come deal with him because honestly, she was not in the mood to deal with this tonight.
“I-” she opened her mouth to let him know that once they got home that he was either going to give her the key to her apartment or she was going to break the door down when he cut her off.
“And when we get home, Zoe, I swear that I’m going to spank your ass for all the bullshit that you put me through tonight,” Trevor said, startling her.
“What the hell did I do? If anyone here has any right to be mad, it’s me,” she snapped.
“No, sweetheart, I believe that would be me,” Trevor said, moving until he was close enough to reach behind her and gently yank the keys away from her without hurting her.
Knowing that it was useless to argue anymore, especially since he did seem more in control now, except for that little muscle ticking just above his jaw, she pulled her seatbelt on.
“Why exactly do you believe that you’re entitled to be pissed at me?” Zoe asked, twisting in her seat so that she could glare at him, silently daring him to say something that would get his shin kicked, hard.
Had he been ignored all night? Had he had a two-hundred-and-fifty-pound man almost sit on top of him? Was he forced to sit there while man after man came and hit on her? Had he-
“Because I told you that I’m in love with you, Zoe, and you gave me the brush off,” Trevor said, shocking her more than she would have ever thought possible. “Do you have any idea how many women I’ve said that to?” Trevor asked, not bothering to look at her as he navigated the back roads home.
“I don’t know,” she answered quietly.
“Only you, Zoe. I’ve never said it to another woman, never had to and do you know how it made me feel when you dismissed me the way that you did?” Trevor demanded. “Or how it felt to be rejected after I told you that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you?”
He didn’t give her a chance to speak and that was probably for the best since he’d left her speechless.
“I love you, Zoe, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I swear that if you tell me some bullshit like it’s only because of the baby, I will pull this truck over and give you the spanking you have coming,” Trevor said, making her eyes tear up, not because she thought he’d hurt her, he wouldn’t, but because he made her feel loved.
No one ever took care of her the way he did or looked after her or just made her smile. The few times she’d had a boyfriend before, none of them had ever defended her the way that he had. Most of them simply ignored her or dumped her.
As difficult as it had been the first time that she’d trusted Trevor, Zoe realized that she was going to have to do it again and risk her heart. There would never be another man that made her feel the way that he did or loved her as much as she hoped that he loved her.
“At this point, I don’t know what to say or do to show you how much you mean to me.
I tell you that I love you and you play it off.
I tell you that I want to buy you a house where we can raise our family and you ignore me.
I know tonight was not the best first date, but you know what?
” he asked, pulling onto their street. “I don’t care if no one knew that we were together for the last couple of months and I could care even less if they have a problem with it. ”
He pulled into their driveway, threw the truck in park and killed the engine, but he didn’t make a move to get out.
“I don’t care what I have to do, Zoe. I’m not letting you go.
I’ve fucked up big time and I’m sorry, but there’s nothing that I can do to change the past. I won’t sit here and lie to you and tell you that I’ll never screw up again because we both know that I will.
I will never hurt you on purpose, Zoe. You have to know that. ”
Trevor sighed heavily as he rubbed his hands down his face.
“I’m not going to push you tonight, Zoe, but you need to understand that I’m not letting you go.
Not now, not ever. I’ll let you return to your apartment if that’s really what you want, but you should know that if you move out, I’ll just buy the building or the one next to it and if you quit your job and go somewhere else I’ll just follow you there, too,” he said calmly, which was a little terrifying, she had to admit.
“Oh, my God, are you talking about stalking me?” Zoe asked, trying not to smile. It was really sweet in a Bradford-kind of way.
“Yes, but if it comes before a judge, we’ll just call it a little misunderstanding,” he said with a shrug.
“And you think the judge will buy that?” she asked, reaching for her door because she was exhausted and even though she was trusting him not to break her heart, she still needed a little more time to adjust to this and figure a few things out.
“Probably, they bought it the last few times that I had to use that excuse, so I have no doubt they’ll buy it this time.”
She was about to ask what he was talking about but then decided it that it was probably for the best that she didn’t know.