Chapter 23
TWENTY-THREE
Scarlett
“Which stuffed animal do you want?” the carnival worker asks.
I step away from Brendan, which is probably for the best, given how my heart is reacting to him.
“The biggest dolphin you have.” I point to the giant stuffed animal in the corner.
The dolphin is obnoxious—nearly four feet tall—but Brendan is kind enough to carry it as we walk through the carnival aisles.
“How about we go on a ride next?” I suggest, taking the last bite of the elephant ear.
“With an enormous dolphin?”
“Finn is very offended by that sizeist statement. And now he feels like a third wheel.”
“Who’s Finn?”
“The dolphin, of course.”
Brendan glances over at me, then his mouth quirks. “Hold still, you have a little bit of cinnamon sugar on the corner of your lips.”
I attempt to wipe it off, but I’m still holding two containers of food.
“I’ll get it for you,” he offers. He sets Finn down, balancing the dolphin against a nearby bench, before studying my mouth. He softly wipes the sugar away with his thumb, his finger lingering there, making my stomach feel funny.
“All better,” he says. “I’ll be your wingman any day, Rossi.”
I stand there for a second, still feeling the ghost of his thumb against my lips, my cheeks flaming.
“How about the Ferris wheel?” I suggest, turning away. Anything to take the focus off the way I’m burning up inside.
His gaze travels to the top of the ride. “You wanna go up there?”
“Of course I do. It has the best views of the city.”
We quickly finish the rest of our food, then climb onto the ride.
As our gondola starts to climb, that queasy sensation tumbles in my stomach.
Finn is sitting on the bench beside me like he’s another guest on the Ferris wheel, which means I’m snug against Brendan’s leg.
“Are you scared?” he asks, turning to study me.
“More like that feeling when you crest a hill and your stomach doesn’t come with you.” I shiver as the breeze picks up.
He puts an arm around my shoulders and pulls me closer. “Does this help?”
I lean into him. “Yeah, it does.”
“Unfortunately, Finn is on his own if he goes overboard.” Brendan nods toward the stuffed dolphin.
I pat the dolphin’s head. “Rest in peace, Finn.”
When we reach the top, the world opens up beneath us. The lighthouse in the distance, the ocean that dissolves into the dark.
“It’s so beautiful out here.” Just as I catch a glimpse of the city, we’re pulled away as the wheel turns. “You know, I’ve never liked roller coasters, but I love this ride.”
“Why’s that?” he asks, looking at me.
“Roller coasters are all about the thrill. That dopamine hit of fear. I’ve never liked that feeling. This ride is slower. It allows you time to just savor.”
The wheel carries us back down and up again before either of us speaks.
It’s not until the wheel comes to a halt that I glance down, confused. “Is it over already?”
“I don’t know.” He leans over the edge of our gondola. “Looks like they’re checking something.”
“Oh, no. Do you think we’re stuck up here?”
“Hopefully,” he says with a teasing smile.
“Hopefully? You like being stranded on a ride?”
“Well, if it gives us a longer one, I’d say that’s a pretty good deal.”
I catch the twinkling lights of houses along the shore. “I love this view.”
He doesn’t answer right away. “Me too.”
When I glance over, his eyes aren’t on the ocean at all.
The wind whips my hair around, and he reaches up to brush a strand from my face, his fingers lingering on my cheek.
“There’s no one here to see us, Brendan. You don’t need to pretend right now.”
“Who said I was pretending?” His hand settles around my shoulder. “I’m saying it because it’s true, Scarlett.”
It feels like we’re the only people up here, floating at the top of the world where no one else can reach us. Up here, suspended between the carnival lights below and the dark sky above, it feels like the rules are different. The questions in my head are finally safe to say out loud.
“Brendan.” I pause, taking a breath to steady myself. “Why didn’t you contact me after Carmen’s accident?”
He stares at me, like he didn’t quite hear right. “I thought that’s what you wanted.”
“What I wanted?” I tilt my head. “You said you regretted what happened.”
“No. I regretted not driving my sister home the night of her accident. But I never regretted what happened that night with you. Not the kiss. Not any of it.”
That should make me feel better. But it’s as jarring as being stuck at the top of this Ferris wheel, suspended between then and now.
“Then why did you tell me to go home at the hospital? Was it because I wasn’t good enough to be with you and your family?”
“Tell you to go home?” His brow furrows. “Scarlett, you weren’t even at the hospital.”
“What?” I blink. “I was there all night.”
His frown deepens. “You were in the hospital lobby all night?”
“Until your uncle saw me and told me to go home.” I don’t tell him the rest. How Rafael Marco made me feel like I didn’t belong there. How small I felt when he dismissed me so easily.
Brendan sits up straighter, turning to face me fully. “Scarlett, I never knew you were there.”
I frown, the pieces starting to fall into place. “But then why did your uncle…?” My voice fades as the realization settles over me.
There was no message.
Rafael just took matters into his own hands, dismissing me without asking Brendan. Maybe it was because the family was in crisis and Carmen’s life was hanging in the balance. Nobody was thinking about some high school girl in the lobby waiting around.
Brendan takes my shoulders gently in his hands, his eyes searching mine.
“All these years, I thought you didn’t show up.
That you just didn’t care. I’d already lost my dad, and we didn’t know if Carmen would make it.
My life felt like it was falling apart.” He lets out a breath.
“It seemed like when I needed you most, you just walked away.” His jaw clenches.
“And now I find out—you thought I asked you to leave?”
“So that’s why you didn’t say goodbye to me,” I say quietly. “Why you never wrote to me while you were in the Marines.”
He nods slowly, and I can see how much this is costing him. “I thought it was what you wanted. And your brother made it clear he didn’t want me around you anymore.”
“Eli?”
“You told him what happened.”
“Actually, he guessed it.” I look down at my hands. “He can read me really well.”
“Makes sense now. He didn’t like the idea that I made a move on his little sister, then promptly ghosted her. That explains why he sent me a text saying I should never contact you again.” He keeps his eyes on the lights below.
“So it was easier to just forget about me.”
“No,” he says firmly, turning to look at me. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you. No matter where I was stationed, I’d lie awake wondering what you were doing. Who you were with. If you were…” He pauses. “Kissing another man.”
His gaze drops.
“Brendan,” I say, waiting for him to look at me. “I wasn’t kissing anyone.”
He lets out a rough laugh. “Yeah, I find that hard to believe. You’re beautiful, Scarlett.”
I reach up and turn his face back to mine. “If I’m so beautiful—” I hold his gaze. “—why couldn’t I kiss anyone else after you?”
He stares at me. “What? How is that possible?”
“It’s pretty hard to kiss anyone else when you made my first kiss so memorable.”
Heat burns across my cheeks, but I don’t try to hide it.
“You were my first.” I swallow, nervous about being this vulnerable. “After that, I couldn’t imagine any other man could measure up.”
“Maybe you haven’t met the right man?”
My eyes level with his. “I have.”
“Then how do you know it was good?” he says. “Maybe it’s only because I was the first.”
I shake my head slowly. “I got a hint of it again when you kissed me at the wedding shower.”
The corner of his mouth curves into that half-smile I’ve learned I can’t trust. “If you think my pretend kisses are good, wait until you experience a real one.”
My chest heats. “What are you suggesting, Marco? That you want to prove you’re still the best kisser?”
I laugh like it’s a joke—not some kind of challenge he’s tossing on the table between us.
It would be easy to say yes. Nobody would have to know.
We’re alone up here, suspended in the night sky, and none of it feels real, like that moment before you wake up from a dream, caught between sleep and reality.
“I’m saying…” He takes my chin gently, tipping my face up to his. His thumb brushes across my jaw. “I’d like the chance to prove it to you.”
Ready and waiting, Marco. But I know better than to jump at the first opportunity I get to really kiss him in over a decade. I should make him work for it.
“If we’re friends, why would I need you to prove it to me?” I cross my arms, hoping he doesn’t see how much it’s killing me not to.
Something blazes behind his eyes. For a moment, it feels like there’s so much heat between us we might combust right here at the top of the Ferris wheel. He leans forward, gaze dropping to my mouth and whoosh—my stomach drops off a cliff.
Something is shifting between us, and it’s not just me getting all in my head.
He’s chasing this.
“I’ve known you a long time, Scarlett Rossi.” He tips toward me. “I know how you like to be kissed. And I wouldn’t be afraid of showing you right now.”
I suck in a breath, everything aching for him to show me.
He leans forward, but instead of dipping his mouth to mine, he presses a kiss to my forehead, lingering long enough to give me a taste of what he could show me.
When I’m ready.
And that’s when it hits me. This isn’t just about kissing him. If it were, I wouldn’t have hesitated. It’s about whether I’m brave enough to take a chance on someone who’s already walked away once before.
The Ferris wheel jerks to a start, and I let out a sharp breath. Brendan’s hand falls to my side. “You okay?”
“Yeah.” I blink and nod. “Yeah, I’m fine.” But my heart is still racing from the heat of his touch and the shock of my realization.
“That’s one way to kill a moment.” He stares at me, his eyes dark and hazy. “But—” He swallows, his Adam’s apple moving in the long column of his throat. “—the offer’s not going anywhere.”
I look away from him, pretending the air isn’t charged between us. Pretending I can’t already feel his lips on mine.