Chapter 56
56
TOBY
Don is going to be pissed at me. I don’t want to wake him up before the ass crack of dawn. Hell, there’s another hour or so before you can even start to consider it bird thirty, but I can’t take standing outside in the cold for much longer. I would try to call Shiloh, but my phone is in my hoodie pocket — the hoodie still laying on the bean bag chair inside the apartment.
I’m a fucking idiot for forgetting my hoodie.
Not only am I freezing, but I also have no way of calling for a rideshare to take me home – not that I necessarily want to go home. I want to spend more time with Donnie and Shy, but in my rush to surprise them with breakfast, I forgot that I wouldn’t be able to get back in.
I’ve never had to deal with having a locked door between me and my home before. Growing up in a small Alabama town, we didn’t lock our door because the only time the house was empty was when we were all out as a family, and my parents took care of locking and unlocking the house. Kink Manor is never locked. We all have locks on our individual rooms, but the house itself is never locked.
Wait a second…
Did I just refer to Shy’s apartment as home?
Of course it’s home. Home is wherever Shiloh is.
Before I manage to get my mind wrapped around my brain’s epiphany, the backdoor flies open and I’m face to face with an irate coffee shop owner. He practically throws me inside and gathers up all the bags I had set down while I paced to keep warm.
While he yells at me, I struggle to keep myself present. I never could handle being yelled at. It reminds me of my grandfather and how worthless he makes everyone feel. It reminds me of how I’ve only ever been a disappointment. Maybe I should just grab my hoodie and go…
My eyes lock onto Don’s and I find myself relaxing in his arms. I know he’s not happy, but he says he was worried for me. Has anyone ever worried about me other than Shy? I mean, my father and Uncle Robert seem to, but one summer doesn’t really make up for twenty years of feeling like I’m a permanent disappointment.
Don starts to ask me something, but Shiloh’s scream echoes off the walls of the stairwell. I don’t stop to think. I race up the stairs. I don’t give a fuck if the door’s closed or not, I will break through steel to get to my kitten when he needs me.
Luckily for Don’s wallet, the door to the apartment is open, and I rush back to the bedroom where I last saw Shiloh. I am used to dealing with carpeting and not wearing shoes, so when I tumble into the doorframe, I’m somewhat surprised.
I ignore the pain in my shoulder and push back to my feet to stumble to the bed where Shiloh is thrashing violently. He’s gone beyond nightmare into full on night terror mode.
“Don’t touch him!” I say just loud enough for Don to hear above Shy’s whimpers when he reaches for our kitten. “He won’t wake up until it’s done and he’ll only feel worse if he hurts you.”
He looks as anguished as I know I feel, but he gives me a nod before grabbing some clothes and heading out in the hall to the bathroom. The second I hear the lock click on the door, I stuff my fist into my mouth to hold back my sobs as I watch the man I love more than life itself suffer through the hell of his past.