Chapter Twenty-Four
Iris
I never acknowledged how comfortable I had become in Remus’s home.
The snowy landscape and the magnificent interior that reminded me of him had become an inadvertent source of comfort.
It was quiet, peaceful, and beautiful. But Remus has yet to return, and Ezra has been too anxious about the situation to allow me to return alone.
So, until he and Xion get to the bottom of things, I am staying with Ezra as a guest.
I finally manage to block out the last bit of sunshine as I push another sheet into the window crevice, closing it.
The sun, the waves, and even the bird calls are all too much.
I have felt terrible ever since Remus’s seal disappeared, and no amount of pink liquid has been able to remedy that.
Even the slightest of sounds pierce my skull, and at night, sleep eludes me, the image of Remus’s mother seared into my head.
But what’s worse is that I have no idea if Remus is okay or not.
I never thought I would care—hell, I never thought it would be possible to think Remus isn’t okay after what happened on Earth.
But I know it’s his mother who is behind this, even if Ezra doesn’t want to acknowledge it.
And I know her involvement in his life has never been a positive one, making me more anxious about what this means for Remus.
A light knock sounds in the doorway, and I flinch as it causes my ears to ring, turning to see Ezra standing in the doorway. His expression is filled with pity as he takes in my handiwork, and he releases a deep breath, stepping into the room.
“Don’t you have a punishment to decide?” I murmur, dropping my head in my hands as I rub my temples.
As much as I want to appreciate Ezra’s concern, his presence alone makes me uneasy.
Noah was right about these beings in general.
They are too far outside of our understanding to have to be around so often.
And with this newest development, just the sight of Ezra is enough to make me shiver in discomfort.
“Iriel’s punishment won’t be decided for another few weeks. Though he betrayed his people, he is still a Leviathan. He has been allowed time to say goodbye to his loved ones before they, too, are banished from our empire,” he says.
I don’t bother responding. The Leviathan culture is a strange one that even allows the most treacherous of people in its midst respect.
I chuckle as I imagine my brother’s life being spared even though I betrayed Remus.
Both of us should have perished if we were to follow the Leviathan custom, and yet Remus spared us both, once again forcing me to see the kindness he extended me.
“Why are you here? Is he back?” I ask.
Ezra is quiet for a moment before shaking his head.
It’s been three days since we lost contact with Remus.
Xion and Ezra both tried to travel to their mother’s dimension but had no luck.
It’s no longer existent, according to Xion, forcing us to wait out this madness.
And with days on Xyrannis being a few hours longer than they were on Earth, the wait is killing me.
“What are you going to do if Remus doesn’t come back?” I ask.
“He’s going to come back. Our mother wouldn’t do anything to hurt him—”
“You don’t know her like you think you do,” I say bitterly.
“Neither do you,” Ezra counters.
I release a humorless laugh, looking at my hands. “I don’t think Remus felt confident going there. I think even he was concerned,” I say as I think of our last day together. No matter how many times or how many different ways I asked, he was very elusive. As if he didn’t want me to worry.
Ezra chuckles, pulling my attention.
“Since when are you an expert on his feelings? Last I checked, you were still bitter about losing your planet,” he says.
I look away, shaking my head. “I don’t know,” I whisper.
I may have been bitter, but Remus always made it a point to engage with me, even if I was angry.
Him bringing me to Xyrannis allowed me to see him in a different context than a ruler I had to outwit.
It allowed me to see who he is as a Celestivine.
Which in turn allowed me to pick up his mannerisms.
“Why are you protecting her? Can’t you see she is different with you and him?” I ask.
Ezra narrows his gaze. “I am not protecting her, I’m just saying your theory is extreme. She is our mother. She birthed and raised us. She would never harm us, especially Remus,” he says.
“She would only raise him with no push to have any aspirations beyond what she deems acceptable, right?” I ask.
Ezra scoffs. “He is a Celestivine. It would be a waste of his life to do anything other than that. And I don’t expect someone with a lifespan that doesn’t even count for a quarter of ours to understand that,” he says.
I stand, letting my irritation fuel me.
“You know, I’ve had it with all of you thinking I can’t have an opinion just because my life is shorter than yours. I can see clearly that this whole situation is fucked up! Are none of you worried about him?” I flinch as I suddenly grow light-headed, swaying on my feet.
But Ezra is by my side, holding me up so that I don’t faint.
“Here, sit down. I didn’t mean to rile you up. I’m freaking out about this, too,” he says gently.
His tone forces tears into my eyes. I know what kind of person Ezra is. For him to show me compassion means this is much worse than he’s letting on. He’s much more frightened.
“I’m telling you, this wasn’t like any of the visions before…before they felt like memories. This one felt like I was there, experiencing it in real-time,” I say.
“Before?” he asks in confusion.
I nod, wiping my tears.
“Ever since Remus and I bonded, I’ve been having weird visions. They’re always in the same place, with someone calling for him. I didn’t tell him before he left, I thought it was just the bond and my body trying to adjust to it,” I say.
Ezra is quiet for a moment.
“When’s the last time you had one?” he asks.
My cheeks burn as I recall the night.
“The night Remus left,” I say.
“I don’t know what this means. Bonding with a human is something none of us have ever done before. Not even Xion. It’s foreign territory,” he says.
“Our mother always warned us against bonding with weaker species,” he adds.
I slowly giggle before it turns into a full-on laugh. Of course, she did. I’ve been dragged across the galaxy into a situation that wouldn’t have happened had Remus just left me alone. Or even not bonded with me.
Ezra tenses next to me, and when I look at him, his brow is furrowed in confusion. He quickly stands before shifting his attention to me.
“He’s back.”
Even though Remus has returned, I don’t feel at ease. It’s been hours since he came back, and he hasn’t come for me. So, as we ride in Ezra’s transport, heading for Remus’s home, I can’t help but twiddle my fingers at what this could mean.
Why wouldn’t he come to me first after what he put everyone through? After knowing the bond between us is gone somehow? I shift my attention to Ezra. Even he looks worried as we continue our journey. And he never looks worried.
“How do you know it’s Remus and not your mother coming to finish the job?” I ask.
Ezra scoffs in irritation at my quip to his mother, looking at me. “I can sense it. Anytime one of us leaves or returns, there is an energy surge,” he says.
“Okay, but how do you know it isn’t your mother?” I ask.
“Because I know the difference between Remus and my mother’s energy signature. How do you think I knew he had bonded with you when you showed up…” he trails, clearing his throat.
“Sorry…I wasn’t thinking,” he says.
I know he’s referring to the loss of the bond between Remus and me. But I ignore the pain his words elicit, pulling in a deep breath.
“Don’t you think it’s strange he didn’t come to get me himself? After all that he put us through?” I ask.
“You’re so hellbent on finding the worst possible outcome,” he says after a moment of silence.
“You are blinded by your—”
“No. I just don’t want to think about what it means if you are right,” he says.
I keep my eyes trained down. I hadn’t thought of it that way.
If there is something happening between Remus and his mother, it’s terrifying to think of how the rest of us will be affected by it.
What would mean for everyone in the aftermath of it all?
What could Remus have done that was terrible his mother would attack him?
He’s literally lived his every waking moment doing her bidding.
It irritates me that Ezra won’t ask these questions because he’s scared of what it could mean.
“Hiding from the truth doesn’t prevent bad things from happening,” I murmur.
Instead of a smart remark, Ezra laughs, shrugging.
“Insightful words for someone who spent weeks in the resistance after her murder attempt,” he says.
I don’t respond, shifting my attention back to the window as we approach the mountains. The discomfort I felt decreases slightly as I take in the familiar surroundings I’ve come to associate as my home.
I ignore the bitterness threatening to rise within me from the contrast of my thoughts now and when Remus first brought me here.
He would be pleased to hear me now—eager to return to the snowy scape that calms me.
But after the confusing few days I’ve had, I’m ready to return to some sense of normalcy.
I’m ready to see him and have him explain with a smile why none of us need to worry, and this was just a misunderstanding.
It takes us another fifteen minutes to reach the snowy mountainside that is Remus’s home.
I breathe a sigh of relief to see it here in one piece.
With each passing second as we land, I feel more and more at ease.
Maybe it was all a mistake. Maybe something terrible happened, but he somehow survived and didn’t want me to see him injured.
As we step off the ship, Ezra wraps me in a coat before we make our way across the familiar balcony, entering Remus’s home.
I know something is off the second I enter. It’s cold—much colder than Remus would keep it if he were waiting for me to return. Remus has always been mindful of me and my physical condition.
As we continue up the hall and enter the main living area, my stomach sinks a little more.
It’s pristine. Every trace of my existence has been wiped from each and every surface, which is another red flag.
I left it a mess when I was here last. And Remus has always encouraged me to treat this like my home, never cleaning up without asking me if I’m finished.
“Something is wrong,” I say as Ezra steps up next to me.
He gently holds his hand out in front of me, putting himself between me and the rest of the room as he looks around.
“Stay here,” he says.
But we both tense as the sound of moans echoes up the hall. My breathing hitches, and my eyes burn as I try to come up with more excuses. But there are none as the moans grow louder and more fervent, lilting into screams of pleasure.
My skin prickles as I listen to the damning noises, tears burning my eyes in disbelief as everything Remus said to me becomes tainted. My cheeks burn as I step forward, moving in the direction of Remus’s bedroom when Ezra grips me by my arm, pulling me back roughly.
His eyes are serious as he shakes his head.
“Don’t,” he says.
He then moves past me, disappearing up the hall in the same direction of the moans. My legs feel weak as I watch him disappear. I don’t know what to feel or what to think. There is no explanation for this or for how I’m feeling.
I feel betrayed.
I continue to look around the room for any sign that I was here, but there is none.
It’s as cold and empty as it was the day Remus brought me here.
He’s erased me from this place. I hastily wipe my tears as a woman comes running around the corner, her clothes in hand.
She ignores my presence as she disappears down the steps, but I ignore her as I hear Ezra’s frantic voice echoing up the hall.
I force my legs to move as I make my way up the hall, their voices getting louder. But they aren’t speaking English, and they are talking way too fast for me to decipher anything either of them is saying.
I quietly round the corner, stepping into the bedroom. The first thing I notice is that like the rest of the house, its been wiped clean of my existence. And Remus stands near the disheveled bed in only a pair of pants as Ezra pleads to him in their language.
He looks different. He’s cold, and reserved, his body language similar to the alien I met in the blight.
His hair is held away from his face and his symbol remains on his bare chest, pulsing with calm as he watches Ezra with an intense gaze, and I feel a twist in my gut at the reminder of what was taken from me. He doesn’t look worried in the least.
Suddenly, his attention shifts, his eyes falling on me.
He doesn’t smile like he usually does. He doesn’t even blink. He looks at me in…disgust. There isn’t a hint of recognition on his features.
“H-how could you?” I whisper, my voice trembling from the hurt that I feel. “Did you do this? Were you sick of me that fast that you—”
I don’t register Remus’s movement. One second, I am in the doorway of our bedroom, and the next, I am held against the wall in the hallway in his crushing grip, my air immediately cut off.
Pain ripples up my spine, settling in other pieces of my body from the force he uses, and my air is instantly cut off. As is my bloodflow.
The world tilts instantly, as Remus holds me, his eyes narrowed. I try and lift my hands to claw at his, but there is an invisible force holding them down. Remus is using his power to prevent me from the simple task of fighting for my life.
“Remus, stop!” Ezra shouts.
I choke, my eyes rolling back as I lose consciousness. He’s killing me and he’s doing it quickly. I feel myself spasming under his touch as the world blacks out, my body panicking. Suddenly, I am released, and I collapse to the ground in a heap.
It takes a moment for my body to reconnect to my mind, and as hard as I try, I can’t remain conscious. The world slowly dims around me, and I hear the sound of Remus’s voice, forcing me to tremble from the lack of emotion I hear as he speaks.
“Bring that thing to my home again, and I will kill it on the spot.”