Chapter 21
Nina
If Nina had to be grateful for one thing since they left the Crystal Clear Safehouse and Ayla moured them to the North Petal, it would be that it was much easier to resist the temptation to sleep here.
There was so much to see and take in, things she had taken for granted all her childhood, when she grew up and served in the North, and until now she hadn’t even realized she had missed them.
She had had little time to play, and definitely not the permission to be seen playing outside of the very restricted servant areas.
Raoul got in trouble multiple times because he was caught with Lenna, but she somehow managed to protect him from major consequences.
At least until the day he was discarded.
For years, Nina spent her days buried doing laundry for every panom with a title or a known surname, admiring the lives of others through the little circular window she always kept pristine.
Her hands were on clothes and soap, her fingers always wrinkled, soaked in water and repetition, but her mind was outside, always outside.
She absorbed life through her eyes. She felt joy when the two lovers who had been shyly approaching for months, kissed for the first time.
She felt sadness when the eldest servant was fired for not being good enough anymore.
She felt anger when little kids were mean towards the weakest, sick one.
From her little window, Nina learned about love and hate, fairness and injustice, support and abandonment.
She dreamed and fantasized so much when she was awake that when the night came, her mind was blank and peaceful, a calm resting background until she witnessed the lives of others resuming the following day.
Nina had never feared sleep, and now she was terrified of it—she was terrified of her.
Nina always tried to resist thinking about her, but that was absolutely impossible, especially when her nightmares repeated over and over in her mind like a broken record full of black feathers and bones.
What Nina had avoided was saying her name or even thinking it, hoping such a powerful being would forget this little, insignificant existence of hers.
She had infiltrated her brother’s mind and eliminated his whiteness from his soul, until she killed his pure heart with blackness.
Some nights when she had failed and hadn’t resisted falling asleep, Nina’s hair had gained a handful of black streaks in the middle of her white, long waves.
A permanent reminder of this unwanted link she hadn’t signed up for, reason enough for her to avoid looking at herself in the mirror.
But this life of hers had not that many things she had ever signed up for.
Being here in the North Petal with Ayla, though, was very much one.
Nina had never gone up these dark marble stairs of the North House, because she never had a reason to.
Other servants were the ones transporting the meticulously cleaned and folded garments she had taken care of.
Only the panoms and the most important of the Northern Elite were welcome in this area.
She was neither of those things, and she would never be, but Ayla hadn’t even entertained the option of Nina not going with her to see her parents.
“Your heartbeat is fast, Nina.” Ayla tilted her head towards her, her red waves swinging over her back with the move. The silver metal of her eyeballs was powerful and breathtaking. “Can I help in any way?”
“I don’t know exactly why, but I’m nervous. It might be because I’ve never been where the important people of this House live, because of who we’re going to meet, or simply because this feels…proper right now.”
“This?” Ayla asked, and when Nina didn’t reply straightaway, she added, “What do you mean?”
Nina lifted her eyebrows slightly, and she didn’t miss the way Ayla’s head tilted to the side, awaiting her response. Her heartbeat had to be even faster now, for sure. “What we are doing, yes.”
Ayla halted, swallowing. “And what are we doing, Nina?”
The blush on her pale cheeks was obvious and immediate, but luckily Ayla couldn’t see it. Nina cleared her throat with a small cough. “We are here trying to find something that belongs to someone because we want something to happen.”
Ayla chuckled, a side smile on her lips that made Nina’s heart jump with happiness a little. It was so unusual nowadays to see her smiling anymore. “Of course we are doing the most cryptic thing ever explained. How could I forget?”
Nina smiled back while the sound of their footsteps changed now that they weren’t climbing stairs anymore. As far as she had seen, Ayla had an excellent memory and rarely forgot anything.
“Your worry about who we are going to meet... I confess I don’t exactly know what I’ll find, but I’ll try my best to make the encounter concise and painless.”
Nina didn’t have to guide Ayla through the corners they had to take, nor inform her of which doors were open and which were not, like the one they were standing in front of.
Ayla’s steps were usually confident and decisive, and so was her straight posture, but in this House—in her House—she moved as if she owned it.
The sharp, brief knock on the door was mere courtesy towards her parents, because as the heir of this House, there was no doubt Ayla could access any room she wished to.
There was almost a five-second wait until the door opened magically, revealing a wide room with dark wooden furniture with Cardinal-red details. Jasper Brachyan occupied the biggest, most notorious chair in the center.
His golden eyes were narrowed, his arms crossed over his chest. Veronica Brachyan stood next to him, her green eyes inquisitive under a fire-red fringe that covered her eyebrows. They didn’t seem the most welcoming panoms on Terrha.
Based on what she had guessed of the relationship between Ayla and her parents lately, Nina wasn’t expecting massive hugs or loving words of welcome, but she definitely was not expecting the first question the North Ruler asked his daughter after not seeing her in months.
“What happened to you?”
The longer Jasper Brachyan stared at Ayla, the deeper his top lip curled. He didn’t seem able to move his sole focus from the new eyes of his daughter. That was until his eyes pierced Nina’s and his mouth dropped open, his eyebrows merging into one as his brow furrowed.
As if the tension in the room were tangible and she could feel every emotion of her father, Ayla clenched her jaw. “Life and purpose happened to me, Father.”
His focus was back on Ayla, yet his brutal words weren’t directed at her this time.
“One of our daughters went mad rebelling and is a lost cause; the other can't even see.” Jasper Brachyan and his very furrowed brow turned to his wife. “Where did we go wrong, Veronica? What have we done to deserve such a miserable fate from the Cardinals?”
Nina’s blood froze, swallowing bile as a feeling she wasn’t used to settled into her veins. She side-stepped closer to Ayla, and held her shaky hand discreetly but firmly. Ayla’s fingers interlaced with hers, exerting a pressure Nina didn’t expect but also didn’t surprise her.
After their unexpected and still unexplained disappearance years ago, Nina had missed and still missed the caring, supportive figures of her mother and father every single day of her life.
She had looked for them endlessly; she had missed their guidance and their presence.
She had learned to live without their love, not to take the existence of beings she loved for granted.
It was difficult if not impossible to comprehend why any parent would harm their children in any way, intentionally or unintentionally, let alone understand speaking in such a derogatory and disrespectful manner about said children in their own presence.
Veronica Brachyan didn’t look at her husband or reply, and he didn’t seem to expect or care for her answer. Ayla’s mother simply shook her head extremely slowly, her eyes fixed on Ayla and Nina’s hands linked together.
“And you, with this unnatural white hair...” The North Ruler narrowed his eyes further as his stare pierced Nina. “Your hair is not normal, and I tend to remember worrying things when they pose a threat to my House. Have I seen you before?”
Nina inhaled deeply before speaking, squeezing Ayla’s still shaky hand between hers as she gathered as much courage as she had ever needed.
"I washed your underwear for many years, sir.
And the underwear your companions left tangled with yours sometimes.
" Ayla's father widened his amber eyes, an angry red blush trailing up his neck.
Nina waved her spare hand dismissively, even if the blood rushing inside her was screaming.
"It was no big issue, sir, no need to blush.
Even if lacy, their undergarments were always so minuscule, it didn't feel like extra workload at all. "
Ayla turned her face to Nina’s, her hand immediately squeezing back at hers. A firm hand that wasn’t shaking anymore. Veronica’s chest, however, expanded a couple of inches from the slow inhale she took, her jaw clenching so tightly Nina feared she would break a tooth or two.
Ayla’s father blinked, mottled crimson overtaking the lower part of his face and his ears now. He avoided his wife's gaze so intentionally there wasn't any doubt Nina's words spoke a very well hidden truth.
“Why is the heir to the North House holding the hand of a mere servant who lies more than breathes, daughter?” If his tone was a blade, Nina would now be bleeding to death, and she was aware of it.
“Why wouldn't I?” Ayla tilted her chin upwards, holding Nina's hand tighter. “I am a free woman, Father. I can do what I want.”
“Cardinals guide lost souls,” he muttered. “Even when we don’t see her, that girl causes us trouble. Have you spent time with that lunatic sister of yours? You sound like her.”
If Nina hadn’t been so close to Ayla, she wouldn’t have heard her small gasp. “Do you even care if Lenna is dead or alive?” Ayla snapped.
“Not as long as she doesn’t give me more work. She cannot give me more disappointment.” He pursed his lips as he interlaced his fingers over his chest. “These questions… This attitude… Ayla Brachyan, have you lost your mind as well as your eyes?” His voice was forced between his clenched teeth.
Ayla's nostrils flared, a tight smile lifting the corners of her tense lips. The grip on Nina’s hand was even stronger, as if she was using all the restraint she could muster.
He was either too blind with anger and shock, or he wasn’t the cleverest, because he continued.
“Let me tell you something, my dear daughter, and pay close attention, for the voice of centuries of experience should never be ignored.
The Cardinals sometimes throw unexpected.
..things in your path, but that doesn't mean you have to keep whatever—whoever—they offer.” His eyes stared directly at Nina with such hatred she could almost physically feel it slicing her face.
“You can pick and choose who you let into your life, who you allow between your sheets.
That you're disabled, blind, doesn't mean you're fully useless.
As the future Ruler of the North, you must always be selective.
You shouldn't pick from the wastage and scraps of society. As my heir, I expect you to do better than that.” He spat the last word, his upper lip deeply curled as if he was smelling the most rotten of corpses, and it was the white-and-black-haired one holding the hand of his daughter.
Ayla let go of Nina's hand. A wicked grin was on her face Nina had never seen before, and she wasn’t sure how to interpret.
Then Ayla opened her hands, and silver sparks, the color of her eyeballs, flew towards Jasper Brachyan.
Before he could react, she Gave him silver manacles, pinning him to his chair, and immediately after, she Gave two silver spears piercing the palms of his hands, removing his ability to use his panom magic.
“What are you doing?” His blood dropped loudly on the marble floor as Ayla approached him, her feet not faltering despite his outraged roar filling the room, the sound bouncing against the walls.
“I am picking, Father. I am choosing who I want in my life. Who I want to Rule my House, and my Petal.”
With her palm open, she drew a straight line in the air, Harming her father as she traced a neat, shallow cut on the upper side of her father’s shirt, leaving his neck exposed.
Jasper Brachyan opened his mouth again, but before he could swear, roar, or beg, Ayla Harmed him again. An inhuman noise left his throat when his cut tongue fell on the marble floor.
“I hope you appreciate how selective I'm being, Father. This is me getting rid of the scraps of society.”
The next thing Ayla cut off was his head, a louder thump echoing in the room as her mother fell to her knees and gasped, covering her mouth with both hands, her whole body shaking as she stared at her daughter with something that Nina could only describe as absolute terror.
A panomquake followed as the magic of the North Petal realigned. Rubble fell from the corners of the room, the ground shook vigorously, and Ayla stood stoically, waiting patiently for Thyria to recover from the change in events.
When the island stopped shaking a few seconds later, Ayla carefully walked over the head of her father, went back to Nina, and held her hand. Ayla didn’t even speak to or acknowledge her mother, who by now had paled as much as her dead father.
With a sigh, Ayla lifted their interlaced fingers to her mouth and placed a gentle kiss on Nina's skin. “I guess I'm no longer the heir.”
Nina grinned, tears filling her eyes as the biggest pride and something stronger filled every part of her being, of her soul, of her blood, and her every organ.
“And what a strong Ruler you will be.”