Chapter 25
Twenty-Five
FELIX
“So, I totally understand why we're speeding and panicking, but how do we know for sure that this next place is the right one?"
I'm too busy trying to keep our vehicle on the road to answer Declan. He makes a good point, though, which makes me pause. How do we know if we'll find her at the next arboretum on our list?
"Because it's next," Jared says, staring out the windshield almost as fiercely as I am. I'm grateful for his attention because I guarantee the torrential downpour is going to freeze, then we're really going to have a fucking problem.
An icy blizzard is the last fucking thing we need.
"That's not an answer, dumba—" Declan cuts off with a grunt. I spare a glance in the rearview mirror and see him glaring at his brother. "Can everyone stop fucking punching me? God, it's overstimulating as hell."
My lips twitch with a suppressed smile. I can't wait for us to get Blue back and settle into our new normal. Through all the stress, there have been flashes of sadness for the humor and fun times she’s missing.
"Don't be rude and I won’t hit you," Roman explains. I bet Declan rolls his eyes, but I can't afford to take my eyes off the road again. The sun set a little while ago, and shit's getting dangerous.
"It's a fair question, though." If I didn't know Declan as well as I do, I would think he's pouting, but that's not it. He's feeling uncertain, and it hurts my heart a little.
I clear my throat while turning up the windshield wipers. "We're going to this one because it's next, which isn't a good answer, but it's all we have. I don't know how we could choose a different one. We've been to too many to choose just one of them for the last stretch."
Last stretch. Is this really it?
Jared's behavior before we got into the car forty-five minutes ago made me anxious as fuck. I couldn't place what was going on with him or me. It felt like there was something we needed to pay attention to.
Urgency.
The pressing weight of fear has been building and expanding in the cab of the car for far too long. Not only do I fear the impending explosion if I don't get there fast enough, but I'm horrifically terrified we'll be too late.
"I'm going to be sick." Dec sounds pained.
Roman makes a disconcerted noise. "If you throw up fucking Goldfish right now, I will actually punch you. Talk about overstimulating," he grumbles.
"Asshole," my boyfriend groans. When I check the rearview mirror again, I see his head between his knees.
"Dec, babe—" I start, the worry in my tone obvious.
"I'm fine," he forces out. "Keep going. Don't stop. Get to Blue."
Nodding, I grip the steering wheel and narrow my eyes on the road. I have a job to do; get us there.
Tuning out the soft murmuring of the others, I focus on the road and blinding lights of other cars driving by us. Trying to imagine what Blue could be doing right now is hard because I have literally no clue.
"Ten minutes out," Jared announces.
No matter what Blue's going through, she's the strongest person I know. You got this, sweetheart, I think, hoping the universe carries my thoughts to the woman we love.
I'm hesitant to step on the gas even more because of the road conditions, but I do anyway. Just slightly.
I half-listen to Roman listing off the food, beverages, and first aid supplies we have. Jared mentions something about Kevin having a huge trunk load of first aid should we need it. They're following behind us at a safe distance, which I'm thankful for. We're going to need all the help we can get.
"Take a left in eight hundred feet," Jared tells me, pointing ahead into the darkness. Later, I'll give him shit for the short warning.
It's not smooth, but I make the turn and hope Kevin manages the slick concrete okay. Soon, the road turns to gravel, forcing me to slow down and squint at the abandoned-looking road. There's a garden here?
Jared reads my thoughts while staring at his phone. "It's going to be up on your right in half a mile. It doesn't look like much in the dark, but it is pretty popular in the spring for its trails and how it’s off the beaten path."
The tension in my body doubles, then triples as I drive, but once we're through the iron gates, I swear I pull every single muscle. Holding back from jumping from the moving vehicle I'm controlling is harder than I ever thought it would be.
I can feel the other three struggling to keep themselves calm and collected, too. "Don't run off. I'll park the car then—"
"We've run through our plan and rules so many fucking times, Felix!" Jared snaps, fucking vibrating with pent-up rage and adrenaline.
Throwing the car into park, I snatch the collar of his sweatshirt before he can launch himself out of the door. Taken by surprise, he's easy to pull back, so I take advantage of his fumble.
Forcing him back into the center console, I lay into him for his risky behavior. "This is different, and you fucking know it, Jared. We stick together. Take a goddamn breath and use your fucking brain."
His brown eyes are wild and angry as he glares at me upside down. "I am using my brain! Blue needs—"
"Blue needs us to help her. We can't fucking help her if I'm terrified about losing one of you as well. We stick together, or use the buddy system."
Jared's breaths heave in and out of him, but at least he's not cutting me off like I've done to him. I refuse to loosen my grip since I don't trust his impulsive need to run off on his own.
Thankfully, Roman and Declan haven't moved beyond unbuckling their seatbelts in the back. I trust Roman to keep Dec safe, but my boyfriend definitely senses the severity of what I'm saying.
I take a deep breath and continue my warning. "We don't know what we're about to walk into. This could be dangerous, Jared. If one of us were to split from the group, we would become a liability and a distraction."
His dark glare softens slightly, and I'm really hoping it's realization setting in. I take one more jab while I have him under control. "Ignore your needs. Please? For Blue."
He deflates and tenses when I push him back into a seated position. "Alright. I get it. Let's go." Levi rips Jared's door open, startling a quiet scream from Jared. "Fuck! You fucking dickhead. That was terrifying."
Lips twitching, Levi huffs and pulls my friend from the car, immediately drenching him in the pouring rain. Poor Jared is getting dragged around. "Let's get a move on. Same plan?" Levi asks me as I jump out and rush around the car.
"Yep," I raise my voice over the roar of rain. "Nobody turned their locations off on the drive over, right?"
Everyone confirms they haven't changed their settings and agrees to stay with the group.
There's a level of anxiety about turning our flashlights on since they'll give away our positions, but it's pitch black.
Beyond small solar-powered lights lining a few paths branching off around the grounds, we can't see shit.
"This place is big. Focus on finding buildings or small shelters. Even if she's not in them, it's the best place to start because it might guarantee signs of life during a storm like this," Roman adds, making a really good point.
We nod and make eye contact with each other. Kevin checks the ammo in his gun, as does Levi. They decide it's best that they go first for protection and a clear shot.
As hard as it is to give up control, they're right. Plus, Declan decided to call the police in the car and let them know we had reason to believe Blue would be at this location, so backup is on its way.
We're all set.
A freezing cold breeze pushes us forward, and we lean into the momentum. Where are you, Blue?