Chapter 10
Ten
Laid Bare
“Dammit, Blake, wait.” Eris’s arm hooks around my waist, pulling me around the corner of the bar and into the alley. “Slow down. What the fuck.”
With the brick wall against my back and Eris’s hand on my chest to pin me there, I deflate. The anger and bitterness leaches out of me, embarrassment and humiliation taking its place. My eyes fill with hot tears, and my skin prickles with shame. “I’m sorry.”
“No, don’t do that, Bambi.” Eris’s hand slides from my chest to my waist, pulling me into a hug. “Don’t apologize for them.”
“I shouldn’t have come. I shouldn’t have brought you here.
” I wrap my arms around zis shoulders, burying my face in zis neck.
Eris’s chin finds a home in the crook of my shoulder, and ze strokes my back as I whisper, “I don’t know why I thought this would be a good idea.
It’s humiliating. I just wanted to prove that I’m okay, that I’m happy for them, but everyone thinks I’m the attention-seeking ex who can’t get over him. I’m so embarrassed.”
“The only ones who should be embarrassed are Bitch One and Bitch Two.”
Fighting a sob, I sniffle. “I don’t belong here. I love this place, and my parents, and Matt and Allie, but I’ve never belonged here. Not with the rest of them.”
“I know, Bambi.” Eris sways us gently, zis voice calming and warm in my ear. “They’re too small for you, but don’t shrink yourself for them. You found two gems who look at you and see the angel you are, and the rest are terrified because your holiness is beyond their comprehension.”
“Don’t start being sweet now, Bud,” I tease, laughing through my tears.
Eris’s smile presses against my cheek. “You started it.”
“I did not!”
“Incredible, you said.” Eris pulls back, a twinkle in those doe eyes. The scars on zis lips go crooked as ze smirks. “Gorgeous, funny? Does that ring a bell?”
I huff. “Those are facts. Not cheesy metaphors.”
Eris cups my cheek, a callous-rough thumb scraping my jawline. “Oh, facts? I see. Well, thank you for speaking the truth then. No one has ever stood up for me like that before.”
My heart pounds in my throat. “Don’t thank me! I’m the one who dragged you into this shitshow. You wouldn’t have to put up with this bullshit if it weren’t for me.”
“Bambi, I knew what I was getting into,” Eris murmurs. “And I did it anyway.”
“But why?” I ask. “I’ve been awful to you. Not just now, but from the start.”
“You really haven’t been, but I like the inner sass you always hide,” Eris teases, far more softly than I deserve. “I’m honored to witness you finally letting it out. You’re too damn nice.”
“I’m not nice,” I insist, shaking my head. “You just saw what a petty bitch I can be.”
“Okay. We can do this another way,” Eris huffs.
Zis exhale prickles the skin of my neck.
“You’re not nice, then. So what? Allie’s cunt of a sister is a bitter jealous hag, and Matt’s uptight controlling mom wants to erase you from his life.
You’re here to rock the boat for your friends, to reassure them that you’re happy for them, not to split them up.
And I’m here to help with that. Because even if it’s not polite, that’s a kind thing to do. ”
“No, I wanted to piss them off.” Fresh tears well up again. “That’s not kind at—”
“Bambi! Stop.” Eris’s grip on my jaw tightens, drawing my gaze to zis brown eyes, narrowed in annoyance.
The inside of my cheek cuts into my teeth under the pressure of zis thumb.
“Fine, you are selfish and spiteful and rude, but you love your friends. And those muppets frankly need someone like you to have their back. So don’t get all bent out of fucking shape because things went the way you wanted.
” Eris steps closer, body pressing against mine.
Zis husky voice resonates through my chest. “You need to tell yourself you’re a petty bitch?
Fine, you are. But you’re petty for the right reasons, and more importantly, for this weekend, you’re my bitch.
And I won’t let you spiral because small people can’t handle you. ”
The pathetic, trembling whimper that leaves my lips is the most embarrassing thing that’s happened yet on this trip—possibly in my entire life.
But the thrill when Eris’s eyes dip down to my mouth makes the humiliation worth it.
My lips are pursed, pinched by the grip of zis fingers as Eris draws my face intoxicatingly close to zis.
“Oh Bambi,” Eris breathes, a smile stretching slowly across zis face. “Did you like that?”
My grip on zis shoulders tightening, I scramble to pull Eris closer, to close the gap between us, to kiss zim like I think we both want to. But zis hold remains strong.
With a tsk, Eris crowds me against the brick wall, one knee fitting between mine. “Say it, Bambi. I used my words, you can use yours.”
My breath grows shallow; too deep, and it would push Eris away when I need zim closer. I swallow hard. “Yes.”
“Yes, what?”
“Yes, I liked it,” I scoff. “Are you happy now?”
“Not quite yet,” ze teases. “Did you like when I called you mine? Or when I called you a bitch?”
My thighs clench around Eris’s. The quiet “both” that leaves my lips is raspy.
“So all this time, you just kept taking all my rude ass bullshit because you liked it?” At my reluctant nod, Eris grins, dark and full of promise. “And you kept that delightful information all to yourself?”
Unsure what to say, I wait, looking at Eris expectantly.
Lovely as that smile is, that is not what zis mouth should be doing.
Ze should be pressing me against this wall and stealing my soul through my lips.
But Eris makes no move to end my impatient agony, keeping that tight grip on my jaw that I don’t want to resist.
“There you are— Oh shit, I’m so sorry!”
God, Matt has the worst timing.
Eris presses a too-brief kiss to the corner of my lips, breathing quietly in my ear, “You were wasted on him,” before pulling away to greet Matt.
Considering I’m a trembling puddle slumped against the wall, it’s unfair how casually ze waves Matt off.
“No worries! We were just talking about heading back to the hotel early.”
“Everything okay?” Matt asks, rubbing the back of his neck. For once, he’s staying an awkward distance away, though the setting sun casts his shadow long enough to fall upon our feet. “Allie said… You left without saying goodbye.”
The rush of irritating, confusing feelings floods through me again.
Eris raises zis eyebrow at me, somehow sensing I’m back on the verge of spiraling.
The scar, a stark interruption of zis thick brows, silently scolds me and reminds me I’m here for the right reasons, even if Allie doesn’t understand them.
I put on a smile for Matt. “Yeah, sorry, my knee was acting up. Sorry.”
“Your knee?” Matt instantly goes into mother-hen mode. It’s annoying as always. “Do you want me to find some ibuprofen? Have you been doing your exercises?”
I huff. “Matt, I’m fine, it’s just stiff from driving. You want me to be in dancing shape for tomorrow, right?”
Matt relaxes, his boyish grin back. “Yes! Good! Okay! I’ll let you two get back to…” he snaps, making awkward finger guns, “what it was you were doing. And I’ll see you tomorrow! For the wedding! Save me a dance, yeah?”
I nod.
“You, too, Eris! Hope you can dance in those heels!” Matt backs away, finger guns still blazing as he disappears around the corner to the bar.
“Are we sure he’s straight?” Eris asks quietly. “He uses a lot of finger guns.”
I chuckle. “I mean, he didn’t exactly have an identity crisis when I told him I was non-binary. He’s just Matt.”
“So,” Eris turns to me, and my heart thumps in anticipation. Zis lipgloss is sticky on my cheek, and I want it everywhere. “Where should we eat?”
“What?” That’s not making out against the wall.
Zis grin is smug. “We were gonna have dinner here. And now we’re not. So, townie, where do we eat?”
“I thought…”
Eris’s eyebrow raises again. “You thought what, Bambi?” Ze waits, but I just shrug. “You thought I was going to drag you back to the hotel and fuck you within an inch of your life?”
Biting my lip, I shrug again, heat blooming throughout my body. “Kinda.”
Ze smirks, stepping closer to me. “Or did you want me to do it here, where anyone might find us? You want Matt to walk by and see you on your knees? You want Allie to hear you scream my name when you come?”
I squirm, shoulders curling around myself. “Well, not them specifically, but…”
Eris laughs, and for a second I panic, wondering if I misread this. If ze doesn’t want me after all, and that kiss on the cheek was a performance for Matt.
But then Eris strokes my cheek again, right where ze kissed me. The spray of rainbow star freckles curves up as ze smiles, both so close and too far from my lips. “Oh Bambi, I love how needy you are. But be a good little toy and have some dinner first. You’ll need your energy.”
My head hits the brick with a hard thump as I melt again, and every thought becomes static. That glimmer of euphoria and desire liquefies me into a puddle as Eris pulls me out of the alley by the wrist.