Chapter 20
Dimitri Morozov
I left Rei alone today, and I fucking hated it.
The only reason I drove away from the mansion was because my father had summoned me, and this time he left no room for argument.
I had been in a foul mood since morning.
Leaving Rei behind felt wrong on a level I was not used to feeling.
He had been quiet when I left, wearing that soft yellow flower in his hair.
When I stepped into my father’s office, he was already seated behind his massive desk, the same one his father and grandfather had used before him. He did not look up from the papers in front of him.
“Sit.”
I remained standing.
He finally lifted his gaze. His eyes were cold, the same shade as mine but without any of the fire.
“The Rossi family has grown bolder than I anticipated,” he began without any pleasantries.
“They didn’t just interfere with our shipments along the East Coast. They managed to get their hands on encrypted records proving our involvement in the recent arms deal with the Albanians.
Enough evidence to bury us if it reached the wrong hands.
The feds. Our competitors. Even some of our own allies. ”
I stayed silent, already feeling the familiar burn of violence crawling under my skin. The Rossi family had been a thorn in our side for years.
My father continued, “They’re offering a way out. They’ll destroy the evidence and pull their people back if we form an alliance. Specifically, if you marry his daughter, Isabella Rossi.”
I almost fucking laughed.
“Marry her?” I arched an eyebrow. “I’d rather put a bullet in my own skull.”
My father did not even blink. “Don’t be dramatic.
This alliance would be beneficial. The Rossi family controls significant territory along the coast and has strong connections in the ports we’ve been struggling to dominate.
Marrying into their family would give us leverage we’ve never had.
It would expand our empire and finally end this pointless war between us. ”
Of course. Power. It was always about power with him.
I had expected him to dismiss the offer outright.
No matter how strong the Rossi position was, we were Morozovs.
We did not bow to anyone, especially not to Italians who thought they could blackmail us into submission.
But then my father leaned back in his chair and said the words that made my blood boil over.
“Maybe this could be a way to end your bad habits, Dimitri.”
Bad habits.
I knew exactly what he meant.
I was sixteen the first time he found out.
One of his most trusted men had walked in on me balls-deep in a boy from my private school in the back room of an underground club in Moscow.
My father had not beaten me bloody like so many other pakhan would have done to their sons for daring to put their cock in another man’s ass.
But he had not been accepting of it either.
He simply decided it was a phase. Something I would eventually grow out of once I understood my responsibilities.
Years had passed, and I was still “afflicted.” I had fucked plenty of men and women since then, never hiding who I was or what I wanted. But lately, the only person I wanted under me, around me, inside my fucking head was a cute, silver-haired Japanese boy who wore flowers in his hair.
And now my father thought a fucking arranged marriage would cure me.
I wondered if he had heard about me claiming Rei at school.
He had been fine with me messing around in the beginning, but he clearly thought I had grown out of it.
He was never okay with me being with a man.
Was that why he was pushing this marriage so hard?
Did he already know? I had threatened everyone at school to keep their mouths shut, but my father was still my father.
“You can’t be serious,” I said.
My father’s gaze hardened. “Dimitri, it’s about time you stop this nonsense.
It doesn’t have to be the Rossi girl specifically.
But it has to be a woman. You are the heir to this empire.
You cannot keep playing these games forever.
The men beneath us are already talking. They question whether their future pakhan can be trusted to lead when he refuses to settle down with a proper wife and produce heirs. ”
“So I should do what you did?” I snarled. “Marry a woman I don’t want and treat her like fucking trash until she’s so miserable she swallows a bottle of pills and kills herself?”
My father’s eyes darkened to pure obsidian. “Watch your mouth.”
But I was past caring.
“You married her for power, just like you’re trying to force me to do.
You kept her at arm’s length her entire life.
When she was diagnosed with severe depression, you weren’t there for her.
You just brought in doctors and pumped her full of medication like she was some broken machine that needed fixing.
I was ten years old and I watched my mother disappear right in front of me because you couldn’t be bothered to give a shit beyond how it looked from the outside.
You let her rot in that house while you built your empire. ”
My father slowly rose from his chair. I could see the way his hands were trembling with rage.
“You dare speak to me about your mother?”
“I dare,” I growled, stepping closer to the desk. “Because unlike you, I won’t trap some innocent woman in a loveless cage just so I can keep fucking whoever I want behind closed doors. I won’t become you. I won’t destroy another person just to protect this fucking empire.”
My father stared at me like he was seeing something he did not recognize. For a moment, I thought he might actually hit me. Part of me almost wanted him to.
But I did not give him the chance. I turned on my heel before I did something I would regret.
“Dimitri,” my father called after me. “This conversation is not over.”
I slammed the door behind me so hard the frame cracked.
I felt so much anger.
It burned through my veins like acid. My hands were shaking. My vision was tunneling. I needed to kill someone. I needed to fuck someone until they screamed. I needed something, anything, to calm the monster raging inside me tonight.
Because if I did not find an outlet soon, I was going to burn the whole fucking world down.
I thought nothing but blood or sex could calm the monster raging inside me tonight.
But the second Rei said I was hurting him, something inside me cracked wide open.
My grip on his jaw instantly loosened. I had not realized how hard I had been holding him until I saw the angry red marks blooming across his delicate skin, the perfect imprint of my fingers. He looked terrified.
More terrified than the night I chased him through the woods with a gun.
Back then, even while he ran, there had been fire in his eyes.
Adrenaline. He had been scared, yes, but he had still fought.
Right now, he looked like a cornered animal.
Like one wrong move from me and he would shatter completely.
The rage that had been boiling in my veins began to drain away, replaced by something far worse.
Guilt.
I slowly dropped my forehead against the curve of his neck. He smelled like flowers, so fucking sweet it made my chest ache. I kept him firmly on my lap, my arms banding tightly around his slim waist so he could not escape.
“I didn’t mean to hurt you, lyubimyy,” I whispered against his skin. My voice sounded broken. “Fuck… I didn’t mean it.”
He trembled in my hold, small shivers running through his body, but he did not pull away. That small mercy soothed the beast inside me more than any amount of violence ever could.
I really had not wanted to hurt him like this.
In my darkest fantasies, yes, I wanted to hurt him.
I wanted to bruise his hips with my fingers while I buried myself deep inside him.
I wanted to mark his throat with my teeth until everyone knew he was mine.
I wanted to push him until he cried and begged and broke so beautifully for me.
But not like this. Not with anger that had nothing to do with him.
I had walked through the door consumed by my father’s words and taken it out on the one person who had become my only peace in this fucked-up world.
I slowly lifted my head and met his gaze.
Today he was wearing a bright yellow flower clipped in his hair.
I remembered him telling me once what yellow symbolized.
Joy. Optimism. The warmth of the sun. But knowing Rei, and the way he chose colors based on his moods, yellow probably meant he had felt hopeful today. Maybe even a little happy.
And I had just scared the shit out of him.
He looked down at me, eyes still glassy with unshed tears. His voice was small when he spoke.
“Are you mad at me?”
I brought my hands up, gently cradling his face like he was something precious. My thumbs brushed carefully over the reddened marks I had left on his jaw, trying to soothe the pain I had caused.
“I’m just mad,” I said quietly. “Not at you.”
He searched my eyes, like he was trying to decide if I was telling the truth. His hands were still resting against my chest.
“Do you… want to talk about it?” he asked after a moment.
I shook my head, pulling him closer until his forehead rested against mine. “Maybe later.”
I wrapped my arms fully around him and buried my face back into the warm curve of his neck. I held him tight.
Rei hesitated for only a second before his hands tentatively came up to rest on my shoulders. His fingers curled into my shirt, holding on.
My little fairy was in my arms, letting me hold him even after I had frightened him. Even after I had hurt him.
“I’ll make it up to you,” I whispered against his skin. “I promise.”
***
We walked through the woods surrounding the Mansion long after dinner.
The same forest where I had once hunted him like prey.
Rei had asked me to take a walk with him after we finished eating, and I had not hesitated. Even after the way I lost control earlier, he still wanted to be near me. That fact alone did something dangerous to the thing inside my chest.
Moonlight cut through the trees. Rei walked beside me, close enough that our arms brushed every few steps.
He had been quiet for most of the walk. I did not push him. My own head was still loud from everything that happened with my father, and I was not sure I trusted myself to speak without making things worse.
After a while, he broke the silence.
“When I’m mad… I go pick flowers.”
I glanced down at him, one eyebrow raised. He immediately flushed.
“I mean—” he started again, stumbling over the words, “what I’m trying to say is… you should find something that helps when you’re angry. Something healthier than… whatever you usually do.”
A smile pulled at my mouth.
“Blood and sex help me just fine.”
Rei hugged his arms around himself, cheeks turning a deeper shade of pink. He stared down at the ground as we walked.
“Something other than that,” he muttered.
I slowed my steps without thinking, watching the way the moonlight moved across his face. The yellow flower tucked behind his ear swayed gently with each step he took.
“I have you,” I said.
Rei stopped walking. He turned to face me.
“I’m helping?”
“Yes.” My voice came out rougher than I intended. “You helped today. I was furious when I came home. Ready to tear the whole fucking world apart. But the second I saw your tears… the anger just drained. Like someone pulled the plug.”
He blinked, clearly surprised by the honesty. Then, after a moment, he asked,
“So… I have to cry every time you’re mad?”
I let out a short laugh, the sound surprising even me.
“No. That won’t be necessary.”
We started walking again. I could tell he was thinking. Building up to something. I waited, letting him take his time.
After a long pause, he spoke again.
“Will you tell me why you were so mad?”
I exhaled slowly, staring ahead into the darkness between the trees. For a second I considered brushing it off, but something about the way he was walking next to me made me want to give him the truth.
“It was my father,” I said. “He has some… issues with a rival. He’s offering to make them disappear if I agree to marry his daughter.”
Rei stopped walking so suddenly that I almost walked into him. He turned to face me, and the look on his face made something in my heart twist.
“You’re getting married?” His voice was small.
I tilted my head, studying him in the moonlight. There was real fear in his eyes now.
“What if I was?”
He swallowed hard, his fingers twisting together in front of him. Then the words came out in a rush, like he could not stop them even if he tried.
“Don’t get married.”
I took a step closer, closing the small distance between us. I could see the way his throat moved when he swallowed again.
“You wouldn’t like that?” I asked, testing him. Pushing a little. “If I got married… maybe you’d finally be free to go home.”
Rei looked around at the dark woods, then back at me. He looked like he was struggling with something big.
“I… I don’t want to go home.”
He took a deep breath.
“My mom doesn’t even notice I’m gone,” he said.
“She only asked where I was once since I’ve been staying with you.
When I told her I was having sleepovers at Marco’s, she didn’t even text back.
She’s too busy with Daniel and their perfect new life.
When I’m home alone… it’s too quiet. I start thinking about my dad.
About the accident. About how he died protecting me and how I couldn’t do anything to stop it.
But here…” His voice softened. “Here it’s different.
I don’t feel alone. I feel like someone actually wants me around. I know that sounds pathetic, but I—”
I could not take it anymore.
While he was still speaking, still pouring his heart out in the middle of the dark woods, I grabbed his face with both hands and pulled him into me.
I kissed him.
Hard.
Rei gasped against my lips, freezing for half a second before he melted into the kiss. His hands came up to clutch at my shirt. He was a little clumsy, a little inexperienced, and it was so fucking cute.
I kissed him like I was trying to crawl inside his skin. One of my hands slid into his hair while the other stayed on his jaw.
When I finally pulled back, both of us were breathing hard.
I rested my forehead against his, my hands still cradling his face. His eyes were half-lidded, lips slightly swollen, and he looked so fucking beautiful.
“You’re not going anywhere,” I breathed against his mouth. “And I’m not marrying anyone.”
Then I kissed him again.