Chapter 32
Rei Kurosaki
When I opened my eyes, I expected to meet a new world. Maybe heaven, or maybe the nothing I sometimes hoped for. Instead, I saw Dimitri’s face.
He was leaning over me. He looked like he had not blinked in hours. The first thing I felt was warmth. The second was the steady beep of machines and the faint smell of antiseptic.
It took me a long moment to register that I was in a hospital room.
My body felt heavy. My legs burned. A throbbing pain radiated from both thighs, but it was distant, like it belonged to someone else. I tried to move, and a soft cough escaped me.
“Lyubimyy.” I did not know why that word sounded like a prayer right then. He leaned closer, his free hand coming up to gently brush my hair back from my forehead. “You’re awake.”
I blinked slowly, trying to piece everything together. Daniel. The gun. The knife. The screaming. Blood. So much blood.
“You saved me,” I rasped. My voice sounded like it had been dragged over gravel.
Dimitri’s expression was conflicted, like he did not believe what I said. He reached for the cup of water on the side table and brought the straw to my lips with careful hands.
“Drink slowly,” he murmured. “You lost a lot of blood. Don’t push yourself.”
I took a small sip. The cool water felt like heaven on my dry throat. When I finished, he set the cup aside and sat on the edge of the bed, never letting go of my hand.
“I got there too late,” he said. His thumb stroked slow circles over my knuckles.
I shook my head, even though the movement made the room spin a little.
“It’s okay,” I whispered. “You came. That’s what matters.”
Dimitri’s eyes filled with something I could not quite name, but it looked painful. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to my forehead.
“I thought I lost you,” he murmured against my skin.
I had never heard his voice like this before. It sounded so human.
I lifted my free hand and touched his cheek.
“You didn’t lose me,” I said softly. “I’m still here. Thanks to you.”
He turned his head and kissed my palm, eyes closing for a moment like the touch hurt and healed him at the same time.
“Your brother and Marco are here too. They have been waiting outside. Should I call them in? I know Marco has been losing his mind worrying about you. And Kento…”
He trailed off, not finishing the thought.
I thought about it for a second. Marco being here made sense. He was my best friend, the one person who had always stayed. But Kento… my brother was probably here out of duty. Out of obligation.
I shook my head slowly.
“Later,” I whispered. “I want you here right now.”
Dimitri’s eyes softened. He looked almost surprised, like he had not expected me to choose him over everyone else. He leaned down again and pressed another kiss to my forehead, then one to the tip of my nose, then the corner of my mouth.
“Okay,” he murmured against my lips.
He settled beside me on the bed, careful not to jostle the IV lines or my bandaged legs. One arm slid around my shoulders, pulling me gently against his chest. I let myself melt into him.
“I was scared I would not see you again,” I whispered. “I was scared of being somewhere you were not. I do not know what happens after death, but I did not want to be there if you were not.”
Dimitri cupped my cheek with one large hand, thumb brushing away a tear I had not realized had fallen.
“I’m here.”
***
Marco stepped into the room after Dimitri gave us both some time alone.
He looked smaller. Skinnier than I remembered.
His cheeks were slightly sunken, and the soft cream sweater he wore hung looser on his frame than it used to.
There were dark circles under his eyes that no amount of rest could fully hide.
It had been weeks since I last saw him properly, ever since Dimitri started keeping me away from school and the outside world.
Marco had been texting me, of course, but it was not the same.
I could see now how much those weeks had taken from him.
He looked weak. How had he changed so much in a few weeks?
Two big black ribbons were tied in his dark curls that day, one on each side.
The moment his eyes landed on me, tears filled them instantly.
“Rei…”
He crossed the room in a few stumbling steps and threw himself at the side of the bed, careful not to jostle the IV lines or my bandaged legs. His arms wrapped around my shoulders as best as he could, and I felt his whole body trembling against mine.
“Are you okay?” he whispered through the tears.
I hugged him back as tightly as my tired arms would allow, resting my cheek against the top of his head. The familiar scent of his strawberry shampoo made my eyes sting.
“Don’t cry, sunshine,” I murmured, rubbing slow circles on his back. “I’m okay. See? I’m right here. I’ll recover in no time. The doctors said my legs will be fine eventually. It’s just going to take some physical therapy.”
Marco pulled back just enough to look at me. His big ribbons bobbed with the movement.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I’m so, so sorry, Rei. I haven’t been a good friend. I let you deal with everything alone for so long.”
I reached out and gently adjusted one of his crooked ribbons, smoothing it down.
“You’re not a bad friend,” I said softly.
“You have never been a bad friend, Marco. You have always been there for me, even when you were terrified. Remember how you stood in front of me that day in the hallway when everyone was calling me names? You were shaking so hard, but you still did it. You’re the bravest person I know. ”
Marco sniffled.
“I missed you.”
I smiled weakly and squeezed his hand.
“I missed you too,” I said.
Marco let out a small, watery laugh, wiping his eyes again.
“And I promise I won’t be a bad friend anymore. I’ll even learn how to make those Japanese snacks you like so you don’t have to eat Dimitri’s sugar bombs.”
I laughed again, louder this time, and it felt good.
“You’d do that for me?”
“Of course I would,” Marco said. “You’re my best friend, Rei. My only real friend. I’d do anything for you.”
Kento was next.
He looked shaken. His shoulders were slightly slumped. His hands were clenched at his sides like he did not know what to do with them.
He did not say anything at first. He just stood there in the doorway for a few seconds, staring at me in the hospital bed with all the tubes and bandages. Then he slowly walked over and sat down in the chair beside the bed, the one Dimitri had been occupying earlier.
“How are you feeling?” he finally asked, but he did not meet my eyes. His gaze stayed fixed somewhere near my shoulder, like looking directly at me hurt too much.
“I’m okay.”
Kento nodded slowly. His jaw tightened. He still would not look at me.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
I blinked, confused. “What for?”
He swallowed hard, fingers digging into his knees. His voice came out strained, like every word was being forced out.
“For leaving you alone with them.”
He pressed his lips together tightly. I had the impression he was physically stopping himself from saying more.
It was hard to know him. I never understood him.
I do not think anyone was capable of it.
His eyes stayed glued to the floor, shoulders tense, like he was waiting for me to yell at him.
To blame him. To tell him he failed as a brother, which he did because he was never one to begin with.
I looked at him for a long moment. Part of me wanted to be angry. Part of me wanted to ask why he was never really there, why he only showed up with warnings and then vanished again. But looking at him now, I could not find it in me to be mad.
“It’s okay,” I said softly. “It’s not your fault.”