Pieces of Us

Chapter 33 Show Me Your God

Amity

‘Baby?’ I hear Linc’s voice, but it sounds so far away to my ears as I wrestle between being a horny hoe and vengeful viper at the thought of him with other women in here. Her.

Sneaking up behind me, he touches my shoulders, announcing his presence. I jolt slightly out of my endless thoughts. ‘Sorry.’

‘It’s okay. Tell me what you’re thinking?’ He sweeps the hair away, allowing space for him to press a kiss to my neck.

‘I’m somewhere between wanting to rip your clothes off and wanting to rip you to shreds,’ I sigh, looking at the perfectly pristine bed. God, I hope he at least popped new sheets on there since the last skank. His head falls in the crook of my neck as I hear him sigh. ‘I hate that she and God knows who else has…slept there.’

‘It’s the same for me. I don’t want to think about anyone else touching what’s mine. I swear, there hasn’t been anyone in here for a really long time. Can I admit something?’

I nod, my body fast deflating.

‘I feel out of touch when I’m around you. I have no idea what you even like any more. I’d like to think I know every part of you, but even just seeing you be so comfortable with who you are…it’s jarring, compared to the girl I used to know. I mean, you used to want the lights off and your shirt on when we were together.’ I flinch at the memories. He quickly rectifies what he’s trying to say. ‘All I ever wanted was for you to be comfortable and see what I saw in you—which was perfection—but you always wanted to hide. Now, you take your clothes off for a living. As much as I loved the old you, the new you is equally wildly attractive,’ He cuts me off before I have a chance to blow up. ‘And before you jump down my throat, it’s not because of your body. It’s because of your confidence. I’m scared I’ll disappoint you because I can’t fulfil your needs.’ As he says this, his hands slide up and down my arms, creating a lattice of goosebumps across my body.

I take a moment to think about what he’s said. It makes sense. All of it. It’s confronting, but it’s a necessary conversation that we need to have.

Turning around and looking up at him, I see the vulnerability pouring out of him. Slumping against him, I wrap my arms tightly around him, hoping he gets the message that I’m not going anywhere tonight. ‘This is going to sound so un-sexy, but maybe we should talk about what we both like?’ I bite my lip, hesitating at my ludicrous idea. ‘I mean, it could go two ways. We either find out we’re horribly incompatible—which I highly doubt,’ I assure him, scratching the back of the nape of his neck. ‘Or it will lead to some pretty explosive sex.’

Those are really our only two options.

He peers down at me. ‘We should get comfortable then?’

Leading me to the bed, we scoot up and get comfy against the pillows. Lying in his arms feels different but still natural. He’s bigger and I’m smaller. He doesn’t smell like a teen who has sprayed too much Lynx on himself, and he seems so much more assured of himself. Even the way he’s stroking my arm as I nuzzle into him is so much more protective and…grown-up than the last time we were together in his bed.

‘When we were together…you liked fingering, licking and normal fucking. Still the same, I presume?’ He breaks the ice, diving straight into the deep end. I tingle at his easy use of dirty talking.

‘Uh-huh.’ My pinkened cheeks hide in his strong torso.

‘You’re going to have to give me a lot more than that, Hart,’ he snorts, tapping my ass.

‘My clit.’

‘What about it?’

‘I like when…when…a guy bites it, and slaps it…with his hand…or his cock,’ I get the next part out really quickly out of sheer embarrassment. ‘I like it rough.’

Squeezing my eyes shut, I feel like my heart is going to explode. He holds his breath. I know this because I feel the inhale but not the exhale. He also stiffens beside me, like he’s a fucking statue.

‘Jesus,’ he exhales after what feels like forever. ‘My cock is already rock hard, and you go and say shit like that.’ He has a sense of awe or wonder in his voice, like he can’t believe this is what I’ve discovered about myself…or what he’s missed out on.

‘Your turn.’ I peek down at his cock and sure enough, it’s standing to attention, waiting for me. ‘Umm, something that you’ve never tried but would be…willing to try?’ I hope there’s something he hasn’t done that he can share with me. I want at least one of his firsts. A pang stings my heart, just for a moment.

‘You’re going to think I’m fucked.’ Now he’s embarrassed. I pinch his hip and he yelps.

‘Honesty, remember?’ I look up at him to show how serious I am about this.

He groans, covering his face with his free hand. ‘Rimming.’

I cough, not catching what he says at first. ‘Rimming?’ I ask. ‘As in me rimming you, or you rimming me?’

‘Both,’ he says sheepishly, turning his face away from me.

I mull that over for a moment. I mean, I like back door action, and I do love when a guy explores there with his tongue, but I can’t say I’ve ever reciprocated.

‘Okay.’ I say it so simply, making his head whip in my direction.

‘What?’ he splutters.

Shrugging, I tell him it’s no big deal. ‘I’ll try that on you. If you like it, great. If not, we just won’t do it again.’

‘Fuck me dead. I can’t believe I was enough of a cunt to let you go.’ He hugs me to him, dropping a sweet kiss on my head.

‘Anal?’ I nod, confirming I like it, to which he sends a prayer up to the Lord himself, making me giggle.

‘Favourite position?’

He changes his answer about ten different times. ‘Doggy. No. Missionary with legs over my shoulder. No. Cowgirl. No. Reverse Cowgirl. No. Spooning. No. Scissoring. No. Up against the wall.’

I smack him. ‘Okay, sex addict.’ Laughing, he pulls me tighter to him and starts tickling me until I’m panting. Once we’re done, the questions resume.

‘Most depraved thing you like?’

‘When a guy comes on my face, but unexpectedly—like, is rough—then demands I drop to my knees and…you know…just kind of sprays me. I like being a little degraded, too, I guess. Being called a…slut.’

‘Who the fuck are you?’ he huffs out, disbelieving.

I shrug.

‘I’m definitely not the shy girl I was,’ I murmur, reflecting on how long it has taken me to be this comfortable. I would never tell him this, but it’s all thanks to Jagger. He made me feel secure enough to take control of my sexual wants and needs.

‘I’m a fucking idiot,’ he laments, banging his head back on the headboard. ‘Have you ever squirted?’ I nod, winking up at him. ‘I hate him.’ AKA Jagger. He knocks his head back again. ‘Was it something I did…wrong?’ Shit, he’s now comparing his skills to Jagger.

‘No,’ I say it firmly, shuffling up so I can look him in the eyes, placing my hand on his cheek so his eyes are in direct line with mine. ‘I’m just not a virgin anymore. I know my body now, and how to get there with or without a partner.’ I give him a tender kiss on the lips, hoping this doesn’t deter him from hopefully fucking my brains out later. This is the exact conversation we needed to have so we could get our fears and expectations out there.

‘Toys?’

‘Love them. I’ve never tried being double stuffed, but I’d be down, and I want to try nipple clamps. Vibrators are a yes, same with being restrained. Spanking. Yes. But not with a paddle or anything,...I don’t think I’m into BDSM or anything really hardcore.’

‘I can’t process this,’ he chuckles. ‘I…I am speechless.’

Sex with Jagger wasn’t a coping mechanism. That’s not who or what he was for me. Discovering all this about myself was just as shocking for me. In a way, though, it did make me feel normal about myself. Like I wasn’t just a broken girl with addiction or mental health issues. I was desirable, and I could enjoy my life. Life after Linc.

Not wanting to walk down that road again, I ask him my next question.

‘Hmm. Hottest thing a girl can do for you?’

‘Cockwarming.’ It’s such an automatic response that I’m taken aback a little.

Huh, I didn’t expect that. ‘We used to do that.’ I think back to how he’d want to stay inside me for hours, or at least until we heard the garage door groan, signalling his dad was home.

‘We sure did.’ He grins down at me, kissing me three times on my head. ‘I haven’t done that with anyone except you. Your heat is just different. I loved how warm you were, and I didn’t want to let you go.’ I hug him tightly. ‘But…I think I want to try when a girl—’ I quirk my eyebrow in disapproval. ‘You,’ he backtracks. ‘I think I want you to…um, well, maybe try it with your mouth.’

Curiosity wins. ‘How would that work? How does that work?’

‘It’s like a comfort thing, I guess, for both of us? I mean, if you’ve had a hard day or I have, it’s where you’d just keep me in your mouth and I’d just stroke your hair, and we’d just be content.’ I’m sure butterflies are about to shoot out of my pussy; it’s fluttering intensely at the thought.

‘Sounds hot.’ I love that he’s letting me in like this.

‘Really?’ Shock registers in his voice.

‘Yeah. I mean, I’ve never done it, but I’d be okay having your cock in my mouth. Sounds soothing.’

‘Christ, baby. You’re killing me.’ His heart is beating erratically under my hand. ‘You don’t know how badly I want all of this with you.’

‘What exactly?’ A lustful haze blankets every one of my senses, needing to hear how much he wants me.

‘I want to shove my cock down your throat and leave it there for you to choke on. I want to come all over your pretty face, and then I want to fuck you like a dirty little fucking slut, until every one of your holes are dripping with me.’

I can’t take any more of these questions. My pussy or mouth really needs attention. Needs to be stuffed. Needs to be dripping. I need to feel how unhinged he is for me, and I for him.

‘Then what are you waiting for?’ My voice comes out husky and low.

I think—no, I know—we’ve done enough talking for tonight.

I only have a few days left, and I need this. We need this. I need to feel connected with him in this way. I need to know that when I leave, we won’t only have this moment. That we’ll have maybe the start of a new beginning. I still want to take things slow with our feelings and our future, but while I think we’ll definitely be more than a fling, I don’t know if I want to be in a fully-fledged relationship with him until we’ve sorted out every issue that has plagued us. Without labelling anything, I want for us, for now, to sit somewhere around casually but exclusively dating.

Tonight, sex might silence any lingering doubts over our chemistry, but it won’t fix other parts of our brokenness.

The mood shifts around us, a blanket of undeniable heat sizzling around us. Before I can make the first move, he sits me on top of him so I’m straddling his thighs. Conveniently and torturously, his cock is in line with my pussy, which no doubt is leaking on his jeans, causing a delicious friction.

‘Let’s get you naked, baby.’ He doesn’t wait for me to agree. He just glides his hands underneath my dress and lifts it over my head, tossing the garment like it offends him. Groaning, I feel like doing a little happy dance because I’ve absolutely nailed the barely there lingerie that I know is wreaking havoc with his willpower. ‘What the fuck is this?’

‘Samples of my new line,’ I whisper in the shell of his ear before licking it. His fingers dig into my hips as if he’s trying to transfer his agony to me. ‘Do you like it?’ I lean back, toying with the buttons of his shirt.

‘You’re going to be the death of me tonight.’ His glazed eyes hungrily ravish the sheer cups of my bra and G-string. There are strategically placed red lacy roses littering the material, which includes both nipples. As for my pussy, it might as well just be exposed. When I created this line, I wanted something flirty and romantic, but equally as erotic.

‘You have too many clothes on.’ I pout before nibbling his lips. Without warning, he tosses me off like a rag doll, making me bounce onto my back. It takes all of twenty seconds for him to strip from head to toe, and I’m drooling. He’s the definition of ‘lickable’, ‘fuckable’ and every other adjective that makes a woman want to get down on her knees and worship a man.

Damn, I don’t remember his cock being this big. Or is it because I was just bigger before? Either way, I’m struggling to comprehend that he fit that inside me not that long ago.

I’m glad the lights are dim because I’m flushed as fuck as I count his abs. Is that an eight-pack? Surely not? When they fuck did he develop this body, and why isn’t he naked all day long? A lot of women prefer a man who is waxed and smooth, but I’m not one of them. The hair on his chest that leads to his happy trail and wraps around his thick cock is making me soak through my non-existent underwear. The only thing I can think about is how he’ll feel rubbing against my clit. The coarseness of his body against mine.

‘Want to take a picture?’ he smirks at my wandering eyes.

‘I’d rather you fuck the hell out of me and cum all over my face,’ I murmur. Old me would have never been so brazen, but now that most of our barriers have been broken down, I feel as comfortable as ever sharing my filthy, sordid thoughts. He hisses in response, practically pouncing on me.

‘You craving my cock, Hart?’ The use of my nickname on his lips makes my heart pound. His cock is directly in front of my mouth, which I can’t seem to tear my eyes away from. ‘Tilt your head back and open.’ He shuffles so he’s kneeling over my chest. ‘I’m not stopping until I blow all the way down the back of your throat, and if you’re a good little slut, I’ll finish off on your face.’ Jesus. Fucking. Christ. I’ve never spontaneously orgasmed before, but tonight might just be the night.

His cock is full mast and looks like one of those ring toss toys. I know without a doubt that my throat and body will be sore and used tomorrow. ‘Have you turned into a little cock-sucking slut who craves dick in her mouth?’ I nod, earning me a light slap to my cheek. That one action makes my pussy burn.

‘Only yours,’ I correct. I’m sure if there was a mirror somewhere, I’d see little dicks reflecting back in my eyes. That's how much I want his at the moment.

When Linc starts leisurely stroking himself, I’m captivated under his spell. There’s a drop of pre-cum on the tip, which I can’t help but dart my tongue to lick. He tastes salty and all man. With a predatory growl, he grips the back of my hair in his other hand and glides his cock into my open and willing mouth. Tentatively, I make little licks along his throbbing length, luxuriating in how it’s both hard and smooth at the same time. Feeding me inch by inch, I adjust my head for him to worm his way down my throat. Grunts fill my ears as I slurp around him. ‘Fuck. Amity. Yeah, just like that.’ Every muscle and tendon in his body threatens to snap when I wrap my lips around his base and suction him in. I bob my head, trying to get him to go deeper, feeling his balls slap my chin, but I’m unable to as his hand wraps around my neck, choking my airways. His grip isn’t threatening but the action is addictive, and I feel my body squirm in pleasure. I’m sure with how deep he is down my throat, that he can feel the lump of cock under his hand. Seconds go by and I feel faint, like I’m floating. When my eyes blur, he jerks back, making me cough and splutter. Automatically, my hand goes to his shaft, working it up and down. His hand fists my hair tighter as he guides my mouth to his balls. Running my wet tongue over them, I slide them back further, making one of his fantasies come to life. ‘Jesus, what the fuck?’ He startles, unbelieving that my tongue is about to penetrate his hole.

‘You said you wanted to try it?’ I don’t recognise my voice. It’s a mix between lust and croakiness from him pounding my throat. I haven’t done this before, but a needy part of me wants to try it with Linc. I snake my tongue to his behind and start slowly circling it while my hand doesn’t give up. The angle has his balls slapping my nose, but somehow, it makes the act all the hotter. Feeling him clench and jerk, I know he’s close.

‘Put your mouth back on me, baby.’ He barely gets the words out before shoving his cock back down my throat. My scalp is pained as he pulls my strands. With little oxygen, my gag reflex refuses, and my eyes sting as water drips from them. He’s fucking my face so hard, I feel all the pent up love, loss and lust seep out into his hardened actions. My breathing hitches the more he cuts off my airway. Pulling me away from his length momentarily, a string of saliva is evident. He slaps my face with his cock before impaling me again. ‘Such a good little cocksucker.’ He pants as he roars one last time. ‘It’s coming, Amity. Fuck. Baby, get ready. Shit. Here it comes.’ He holds my head to his cock and spurts down my throat. Hot liquid slides down, making me cough and splutter. Pulling back, the last ropes of his cum splash against my right eyelid and left cheek, some even dribbling on my open lips and waiting tongue. Tapping the last beads leaking out into my mouth, I moan as I suck around his tip, as if I’m drinking a milkshake.

God. I needed that.

Collapsing on top of me, he cups both my cheeks with his strong hands, licks around my mouth and kisses me deeply. ‘You’re fucking perfect.’ He looks in my eyes with the same sincerity, honesty and truth I’ve seen all my life.