Chapter Thirty Five
T he doctor looked tired, but she was smiling and for the first time in what felt like hours, Sophie felt her muscles relax just a tad.
“First, you can see your dad in just a minute,” the doctor said.
Sophie heard Gio let out an enormous breath.
“We’re about to send your dad in for surgery. The arteries in his heart are narrowed and we’re going to put in a stent to open them up,” said the doctor, obviously putting things simply for their benefit. “The operation isn’t without risks, but he got here quickly. He’s got a strong pulse at the moment, and we’re optimistic. Do you have any questions?” She looked from one to the other.
Sophie shook her head. She had a million questions, but nothing she could articulate. More than anything, she wanted to see her father.
“Then I’ll let you in to see him for a few minutes,” said the doctor. “Please try not to excite him, and he’s going to be a bit tired. But he’s been a very lucky man.”
“What do you mean?” Gio asked.
The doctor shrugged. “The number of people whose hearts stop and get restarted outside of a hospital is… negligible at best. The chances are incredibly slim. Your dad just happened to be around someone who knew what they were doing.”
“Who?” asked Sophie.
“I don’t have that information,” smiled the doctor. “Now, if you want to go and see him, just go through that door right there. Only a few minutes, mind.”
Sophie felt Gio reaching for her hand, something he hadn’t done since she was a child. He pulled her through the door and on the other side, she found someone she hadn’t expected to see in her wildest dreams.
Tilly was sitting on a plastic chair, a styrofoam cup of coffee in her hand.
“What—” Sophie began.
“No,” said Tilly. “Not now. Go to your dad first. Go on.”
And she had no choice. Gio was pulling her into the room and then he was there, pale and weary looking, but smiling, his eyes sparkling.
“Didn’t think I’d go without giving you some trouble, did you?” he said.
Sophie collapsed onto him, hugging him as gently as she could while tears fell from her eyes.
“No, no,” her dad said. His voice was weak. “Sit up, both of you. I need to talk to you before… before.”
“Dad, I should have been there,” Gio said.
“No,” said their father. “I should have taken better care of myself. And I’m going to. You’ve not seen the back of me yet. Gi, I’m proud of you. I might not say it enough, but I am. You’re a good lad and you’re a brilliant mechanic. Better than I ever was. I love you, son. Don’t forget that.”
Gio nodded and turned away, not wanting his tears to be seen.
“And you,” he said, turning to Sophie. “I was wrong.”
“About what?”
He closed his eyes. “Life’s short, Soph. Life’s short and shitty and there’s the occasional glimpse of sunshine.” He opened his eyes again. “You know what makes it all worth it?”
She shook her head.
“Love. That’s it. The only thing. Love for your kids, love for your pets, love for your friends. And love, real love. It doesn’t come along often, but when it does, you need to grab it with both hands like a bloody life raft.”
“I don’t understand,” Sophie began.
“She’s out there,” said her dad. “She saved my life. And I know you love her. I’ve known you your whole life. I can read your face as well as my own. You’re angry at her and you’re confused about things, but that doesn’t take away the fact that you’ve fallen in love with her.”
“Dad—”
“Tell her,” he said, eyes closing again. “If I wake up from this damn operation and you’re still single, there’s going to be hell to pay.”
Sophie squeezed his hand, and the door opened, admitting a nurse. Sophie bit back a sob.
“Enough of that nonsense. I’m going to be fine,” her dad said. “Now, off with the two of you, I’ll see you on the other side of this.”
She and Gio waited as her father’s bed was wheeled out.
“I need to move the car,” Gio said when he was gone.
“Go on then,” said Sophie, knowing that he wanted to be alone for a while, wanted to shed some private tears.
She let him go and took a deep breath before she walked out into the corridor.
Tilly was still there.
“Sophie,” she said, standing up.
“No,” said Sophie. “Sit down, be quiet, and listen to me.”
Tilly sat.
Sophie took a second to gather her thoughts.
“You’re right,” she said, finally.
“About?”
“Your job is important,” Sophie said. “I’ve been thinking that it put me in second place, but this is your job, saving lives, making people safe. You putting your job first means that I get to hug my dad again. I was being selfish and stupid, thinking that an intelligent, decent person only had time for one thing in their life.”
Tilly watched her silently, eyes blue as the ocean.
“What I mean is,” said Sophie. “Is that we’re different, you and I. We’re different and that’s okay. We have different priorities about things, and that’s fine. You might not always love my family, and they might not always love you, but sometimes, just sometimes, we have to put ourselves first. And that’s what I’m doing.”
“Are you?” Tilly asked doubtfully.
Sophie sighed and sat down. “I’m doing a terrible job of explaining things. Okay, let’s try again. Thank you for saving my dad’s life.”
“You’re welcome.”
“And I understand that your job is important and that it’s important to you. I don’t want to stand in the way of that.”
“Okay.”
She took a breath. “And what I’m saying is… well, is there a chance for us? I’d like there to be a chance for us.”
Tilly was silent.
Sophie felt her heart start to crack. “I don’t want to be without you,” she said, more quietly. “I want to wake up with you. I want to see your smile when I come home. I want to feel you next to me when I’m sad and laugh with you when I’m not. I can’t imagine a world that doesn’t have you and me in it together.”
Tilly reached out and took her hand.
“When you asked me to move in with you, it felt… right,” said Sophie. “Like the world just clicked into place like a big Rubik’s cube, all the colors in all the right places. I don’t think I realized at the time what that was. It was so quiet, so understated, so perfect in its normality. But I know now.”
“What was it?” asked Tilly, equally quietly.
“It was me falling in love with you.”
Tilly took a shaky breath. “You’re right,” she said. “My job is important. But people have been trying to explain to me for a long time why it’s important. It’s not the job, it’s the people. Max keeps telling me that policing is for the people. And I don’t think I really understood before.”
Sophie stroked her thumb on Tilly’s palm.
“It sounds stupid, but it’s easy to forget sometimes that people are who they are. This afternoon I was doing CPR on this man and I wasn’t thinking that he was a patient, a body, a potential criminal, someone who hated me. The only thing I was thinking was that this was your dad.”
Sophie gulped, but managed not to cry.
“My job is only important if I have someone to do it for, someone to give it meaning,” said Tilly. She looked up. “And that person is you.”
“Me?”
Tilly nodded. “I didn’t plan on falling in love. I didn’t plan on compromising my career. Honestly, I didn’t think it was possible. But these last few weeks with Max and Mila have made me realize that who you love is important. Who you come home to is important. Who you build a life with is important.”
“I think it is,” agreed Sophie.
“And for me, that person is you.” Tilly gave a small laugh. “I have no idea when it happened. I think the first time I saw you, I knew that there was something different. But it all crept up on me, this slow, stunning realization that actually, you are the other half of me. You’re right, we’re different, but that’s a good thing. It means we can complete each other, be stronger together.”
There was a long minute of quiet.
“What I’m trying to say is that I love you too,” Tilly said, finally, her voice cool and strong in the empty hospital corridor.
Sophie bit her lip. “Are we going to make this work?”
“I’ll always ask before I take any overtime,” Tilly said.
“I’ll try to remember that you’re saving the world before I get angry that you’re not home for dinner,” Sophie said with a grin.
“There is one more thing,” Tilly said. “Your family.”
Sophie sat up straighter. “My family are grown adult men who are more than capable of looking after themselves. You saved my dad’s life, and he’d better be grateful for it. As for Gio, well, he can like it or lump it. But if he wants a decent home-cooked meal every now and again, he’d better get used to things.”
“You sure?” Tilly asked, gripping her hand.
Sophie nodded. “I’m sure. I need to live my life for me. And for you.”
Tilly smiled a crooked smile, and it was more than Sophie’s heart could take. She leaned in and brushed Tilly’s lips with her own and then deepened the kiss until her arms were around Tilly’s neck and time stood still.
Until she could feel Tilly’s heartbeat in her lips and feel the muscles of her neck relaxing. Until she could feel the perfection that they made together.
Until the corridor door swung open and Gio strode in. “What the hell?” he shouted.
And Sophie began to laugh. “Gi, meet my girlfriend.”
“We’ve already met. When she arrested me,” he growled.
Sophie rolled her eyes and took Tilly’s hand. “Better behave yourself then. She’s got handcuffs in her back pocket.”
Then both she and Tilly were laughing at the wide-eyed shock on Gio’s face.