Chapter 13
13
NICKY
A s expected, Ronan’s terrible mood continues in the car. He’s super sulky during the whole drive back to Starlight Falls. I spend my time quietly scrolling through my phone and reading what the blogs are saying about tonight’s game. It’s not good.
After half the trip has gone by with him huffing and puffing and sighing, I decide that I’ve had enough.
I break the heavy silence in the car. “Look, I can totally understand your frustrations about losing the game. But in public, you have to get your emotions together.”
He scoffs, throwing me a glance. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I mean that you wear your emotions on your sleeve. If you’re pissed, everyone knows it. If you’re out for revenge, everyone knows it.”
“Whatever,” he mutters, shaking his head and leaving me out in the cold.
Whoa, grump face. I’m just doing my job. He’s not being receptive to this conversation at all.
I try again, using empathy as an entryway this time. “I get it—they say it’s good to let out your emotions now and then. But like it or not, you’re a public figure. Flying off the handle like that all the time will be your downfall.”
Ronan’s eyes slice my way before glaring back out the windshield. “Well, you seem to be an expert at hiding your emotions,” he bites angrily. “So tell me, how’s that been working out for you, Nicky?”
My neck jerks back at the blow. “What?” And since when is this conversation about me?
“You heard me.” He doesn’t back down. “I mean—who are you to give me advice on how to deal with my emotions? Especially when your own strategy for handling the way you feel consists of burying it all under your tough girl persona?”
Well now I’m ready to drop my gloves, too! “I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about but it sure as hell sounds like you’re about to cross the line. And if I were you—”
“That guy at Christmas,” he cuts me off, fearlessly plowing over my professional boundary. “I saw that guy be a tool to you. But you didn’t bat an eye. You just went on acting like it didn’t bother you. Trying to act all tough and keep it inside.”
His cutting remark slams into my chest.
And now I’m the one losing my cool. “None of that is your business,” I yell at him. “It has nothing to do with your PR nightmare. I’m not the one on every sports channel, getting blasted for being a jackass—again! I’m not the one whose career is on the road to hell! I’m not the one about to selfishly drag down an entire hockey franchise along with me!” My arms flail wildly as I speak.
Ronan barks out. “Everybody thinks I’m not invested in what happens to my career. But I am. I do give a shit. Because this may be a job to you, and it may be a fat paycheck to the team owners. But this right here? This is my actual life. So yes, Nicky, I do fucking care about myself and about my team and about the future of this team. I wish I could make everyone see that.”
“You’re invested? Then start acting like it,” I spit out, my blood hot with anger. “And let’s make one thing clear—I will not talk about my personal life with you. In fact, as of right now, I’m not talking about anything at all with you. I’m officially off the clock.”
I’m done.
I press my lips together, not trusting myself to say anything more. Because if I open my mouth, there’s no telling what I’ll say in this state of mind.
Emotions are running high. I don’t want to keep pushing this conversation, only to have one of us say something that we’ll end up regretting.
Ronan’s jaw works and I half-expect him to keep arguing. But thankfully, he stays quiet. Crossing my arms, I shift so that I’m looking out the passenger window. I’m so mad, I can’t even look at that frustrating man right now.
We drive back in silence, and I’m more than okay with that.
When we pull into the driveway, I can’t get out of his car fast enough. Bag strap slung over my shoulder, I fling open the door and jump out, without even glancing at him.
“Hey, wait up!” he calls out after me. “Nicky, wait! The walkway to the guesthouse is dark at this time of night. And it’s probably slippery too.”
I ignore him. It’s been a long day, and I just want to get inside and go to bed. The last thing I need is to finish our argument out here in the cold, just because he wants the last word. No thank you.
I hear his heavy footsteps as he jogs after me.
Great.
I spin around to face him, so I can tell him to back the heck off. “Why won’t you just—?!”
Before I can finish my sentence, I step on a patch of ice and slip.
My arms pinwheel. My feet slide.
I’m mentally preparing myself for the moment when my ass meets the cold, hard pavement.
But somehow, Ronan manages to catch me.Like lightning, his arms shoot out, sweeping me up against his chest. Next thing I know, my body is draped all over his. My feet are dangling above the ground and he’s cradled me against his strong, warm torso. He’s carrying me like Superman carries Lois Lane.
“Put me down,” I protest, wiggling against his hold.
He ignores my demand. In fact, his arms tighten around me.
“Ronan, let go of me.”
He doesn’t. He just starts marching toward the guesthouse and I’m nothing but a prisoner in his muscled arms.
I continue to fight him but it’s half-hearted, at best. We’re in such an intimate position and Ronan’s proximity distracts me.I can smell the soap he used in his post-game shower. I can see the faint dusting of freckles on the bridge of his strong nose. I can feel the blazing inferno emanating from his body. I just want to melt into the heat of him.
I inadvertently fling an arm around his neck and he carries me down the path, bridal style, like I weigh nothing at all.
Once we’re safely on the porch, he sets me down on my feet at the front door. I quickly straighten, trying to regain my composure. My bag slips from my shoulder hitting the floorboards with a dull thump. Face hot, jaw ticking, I angrily swipe my palms down the front of my wrinkled skirt, smoothing out the fabric.
He steps closer, a concerned look on his face. “Look, Nicky. I’m sorry for being an ass to you back in the car.” He speaks in a low rasp, gently touching my hand. “I was…I was wrong. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”
I’m glowering as I stand here, watching him.
He takes one more step, effectively crowding me against the door. “Peach…?”
The broken tone in his voice makes my knees falter. Is the mere sound of his voice supposed to make me feel this weak? Backbone up, Nicky.
If he thinks I’ll just buckle, he’s wrong. I’m good and pissed and I’m about to tell him all about it.
“You are the most infuriating man I know.” My palms shove at his chest, trying to put space between us.
I fail. His massive body doesn’t even budge.
“You don’t get to have an opinion about my personal life.” I push at him again. “You don’t know a thing about me. You have no fucking right sticking your nose in my business like that.” I carry on and on and on.
On my next attempt to push him, his fingers circle my wrists. He effortlessly yanks me right up against his warm, solid body.
“You are absolutely right,” he concedes, his lips tenderly brushing over my knuckles where they’re trapped between us. That takes me off-guard.
“Where do you get off acting like you know me?” I croak as I feel his hand fall to my waist.
“I apologize for that,” he says softly, his mouth grazing over my cheek in a soft kiss. Further weakening me.
What the fuck? What is he doing?
“I’m trying to establish a professional boundary between us,” I declare, even as my fingers slide up the tight, muscled planes of his torso, caressing him. I feel his muscles jump beneath my touch.
“Yeah, I should respect your boundaries,” he whispers, right before he presses another soft kiss to my jaw.
I can actually feel myself falling for his apology. That only makes me angrier with myself.
“And you’re doing everything in your power to blur the line.” My head falls back against the door, giving him better access.
His arm tightens around my waist as his face dips into the curve of my neck.
“And everything you do just pisses me off,” I say breathlessly.
I feel his teeth draw a path along my throat. “I’m just a bad, bad boy. Yeah, I get it.”
“Ronan…” I whimper drunkenly, my head spinning.
He slips a knee between my legs and on instinct, my fingers clench in the front of his sweatshirt. At this point, I can’t tell if I’m pushing him away or pulling him closer.
All I know is he keeps kissing my face, causing maddening tingles to erupt every place his lips touch. I want his mouth on my mouth. And I’m well aware that I shouldn’t.
Ronan’s hips pin me to the door. He grinds against me, giving me a feel of the thick rod in his pants. My jaw falls open. Instantly, my thoughts are all jumbled up.
“Are you done running your mouth yet?” His rumbly voice travels down my spine, tickling my most sensitive parts.
I gulp around the rock in my windpipe. “Uh-huh…”
He pulls back, just enough to look at me in the dim light. A self-satisfied smirk comes to his lips. He knows there’s a battle raging on inside me. And he knows he’s winning.
That smirk of his pisses me off. I don’t wanna see it.
That’s why I pop up onto my tiptoes, yank him down to my level and kiss that smirk right off his face.
The growl that leaves his mouth travels straight to my nipples before diving into the space between my thighs. His lips slide over mine, pressing firmly before his tongue laps gently at the seam of my mouth.
I don’t hesitate to let him in. In fact, I throw my arms around his neck and let my tongue dance with his.
I block out all the reasons why this kiss is a very, very bad idea.
Instead, I slide my fingers into his hair and his toque falls away. I’m clutching two fistfuls of the silky strands and getting hopelessly lost in this moment.
Ronan lets his hands explore. He grabs at my ass and my thighs and my waist before snaking his hand beneath the hem of my coat. My skirt gets all bundled up around my waist as I work myself against the steel in his pants. The hard ridge of his zipper rubs against my aching clit. Sparks explode in my belly and the bud of nerves between my legs sings at the friction as we rub all over each other.
Wait. What the hell am I doing?
The guttural echo of his groan reverberates through my body, making my thighs tremble and my nipples ache. But when I feel his fingers skim up under my skirt and trace the lacy edge of my underwear, my good sense comes barreling back, all at once. That’s when I can no longer push out the voice in my head. The voice that’s yelling at me that we plowed right over the line.
Shit.
Eyes pressed closed against the glaring obviousness of this mistake, I hurriedly steal my lips away from his .
We stand here, tangled in each other’s arms, his forehead leaned on mine.
His chest heaves with each rapid breath. “Fuck, Nicky…” His words form tiny puffs of air in the space between us. “That was—”
“A mistake…” I whisper before he can find whatever word he’s looking for. “We made a mistake.”
He blinks. His arms drop from around my body. “Right. A mistake.”
I momentarily search for something to say. Something to fix this. But my head is a complete mess right now.
So, I grab my bag off the floor, turn on my heel and rush inside the house, letting the door shut behind me with a heavy slam.
What the hell was that?! Since when do I behave like a crazy person? Nothing makes sense in my brain right now.
This man is driving me absolutely nuts. He’s an expert at getting on my nerves. As fired up as I am, I need to keep distance between us.
Because if I don’t, I might accidentally lose my mind. And drag him right upstairs into my bed.