Chapter 26
CHAPTER 26
DORI
I’m frozen as I sit on top of Hunter, staring into his haunted green eyes. He’s right. Not long ago, I was hours away from ending everything with him.
“Dorothy, if you had been holed up with Jamison with no contact from me, you’d be on top of him right now.” Hunter’s gravelly voice vibrates over the last part of the sentence.
Since we went to Paris, I haven’t been to a therapy session. I’m regretting that decision now.
Is this the same pattern I’ve been playing out with Hunter and Jamison? The one that’s so unfair and selfish because loving them both constantly hurts them.
It’s my fault they’re no longer friends. It’s my fault they gathered information on each other and held it over each other’s heads. They’re at war and it’s all because of me.
Guilt rains over me. I shift off Hunter and do what I usually do—try to ignore it.
I slip into a robe as I search for a way to change the subject. “Have you eaten? I can make you dinner if you’d like.”
“Not after that reaction.” He gets back into his clothes. “Where did I lose you? ”
“What do you mean?” I toss a blanket that fell on the floor back onto my bed.
He tucks his shirt into his pants and zips them up. “Dorothy, we’ve been doing so well talking about how we feel. It’s brought us much closer. Please don’t shut down on me now. Tell me what has you acting like you’re going to run to the hills.”
I sit on the bed and hang my head. “I’m sorry, Hunter. That’s not what I’m thinking of doing. It’s just when Jami told me about his son, a part of me forgave him on the spot. I can’t imagine how much pain he must be in. What kind of person am I to see only the betrayal in what he did and not recognize he could probably use a friend?”
Hunter kneels before me and stares into my eyes. “This is one of the reasons I love you. Your heart is more forgiving than most. It’s okay that you feel betrayed, even if he’s hurting over his loss. Your feelings are valid.
“And if you choose to forgive him… No, I’ll be honest with myself. When you choose to forgive him, you can offer him support. You don’t owe him any more than that before you’re ready.”
“And how are you going to feel when that happens?”
Hunter breathes in deeply and shakes his head on the release. “I won’t like it, but I’ve got to learn to trust you two together.”
My brows crease. “You don’t trust me now?”
His eyes roam over my face. He pushes off the floor and rubs the back of his neck. “I want to.”
I rise to my feet and move to catch his gaze. “But you don’t.”
“You still love him. As much as that pains me to say, you do. We’ve been here before and I almost lost you. I’m struggling to believe that won’t happen again. It’s not that I don’t trust you. It’s just that I don’t know if you love him more. ”
Confusion fills my mind. I love Hunter. Working so hard on himself is the kindest thing any man has done for me. He’s doing everything—risking everything—because he loves me. That’s the kind of love I deserve.
But I can’t go on like I did before and pretend I don’t care about Jami. It’s unfair to Hunter for me to hide that now.
“Hunter, I love you. I told you that in Paris. I meant it then and I mean it now. Yes, I have feelings for him, but there’s something you need to understand. You’ve told me everything you did to sabotage him and me. You owned up to it and promised me you wouldn’t do it again.”
“Yeah, and what if one day you resent me for doing it in the first place?”
“From what I can see, you’re working every second to be a better person. That means the world to me. And I’ll work with my therapist to make sure I’m not repeating my past mistakes while keeping you informed about my progress.”
I rush to Hunter and take him by the arms. “I’ll share with you like you have with me, even when it’s hard. So get this through your head. I’m not walking away from you this time.”
His hesitant eyes look down at me. “Are you sure of that?”
“Yes.”
Relief washes over his face. “How are you so sure?”
“It’s different this time. A lot was happening behind the scenes that I was unaware of. Both of you were out of line with your threats, which still angers me. But I’ll work through that.” I lead him to the couch.
“Is there anything else that’s different?”
We sit on the sofa and I face him. “When Jami and I spoke, he deflected and threw things back at me. He was trying to tell me what you did to him.”
“Like?”
“He told me I knew nothing about you. When he found out you had told me everything, he still couldn’t take responsibility for anything he did. ”
Hunter squeezes my hand. “I told him I planned on telling you everything. He didn’t believe me, so thank you for proving I did. Maybe he’ll take my warning and realize he could be in danger.”
Worry for Jami fills my blood. “I told him why you have security following me. He pointed out you were doing it long before now.”
Hunter’s cheeks turn red. “I’m sorry I was such a dick before. Doing that was more than intrusive. It was wrong.”
“We’ve been through this, and I let you have it for a few hours. You know I won’t tolerate that, so quit apologizing and promise to do better. And I’ve done some pretty bad things to you, so let’s move forward and build a healthier relationship. Let’s get it right this time.”
He slips his hand around the back of my neck. “You’re such a forgiving person. I promise to do better. And if I stumble, which I’m sure I will, please remember I’m doing my best. Don’t run away from me. Talk to me and help me see where I need to work harder because I don’t think I can live without you.”
My heart flutters.
“Deal.” I lean forward and seal our promise with a kiss.
He pulls away with love streaming back at me. “Come home with me and stay. We can have dinner and go to bed early. I’ll run you a bath and give you a massage. Then I’ll hold you in my arms as we drift to sleep.”
“That sounds amazing, but I have a ton of work to catch up on.” I gesture to the files thrown around my coffee table.
“One more night won’t hurt. I’m your boss, so I know. I don’t want to spend another night without you in my bed. I like having you with me.”
He smirks. “Besides, you need to do laundry and I have a washer and dryer for you to use at your leisure. And if that’s not enough, I want to remind you I’m out of town all next week. You might miss me when I’m gone. ”
“You had me at doing my laundry at my leisure. I hate sitting and waiting for it. And I will miss you, so help me pack some things and decide what we’re going to eat. I’m starving.”
I get up and straighten out my files. “Don’t think you’re getting out of my bath and massage. I’m not only hungry, but I’m sore and tired too. Your massages always help me sleep.”
His laugh is full of seductive promise. “Don’t count on it this time, beauty. Now that we’re having sex again, touching you will have me wanting you that much more.”
A new week is upon me. Hunter’s gone, and it’s the first time we’ve been apart since we got back together. I can’t say I like it, but my therapist thinks it’ll be good for me.
In my last therapy appointment, she made it clear that she was concerned about me ‘jumping’ back into a relationship with him. Even though I see her point since I still care about Jami, Hunter has shown me he’s willing to do what it takes. That means so much to me.
Jami, on the other hand, has been buried in work, so I’ve had little interaction with him. But today’s different.
We’ve been in a meeting for the final stage of the launch. Jonah just told us we need to get the last pieces of the marketing and advertising together so I can hand it off to the sales team.
“Dori, once you figure out what needs to be done, don’t be afraid to delegate some of the tasks to Melanie. I think she’s ready to take on more responsibilities.” Jonah glances at his notebook.
“Sure thing.” I read over the list of items we’ve discussed.
I think Jonah’s trying to get Mel more involved so he can spend more time with her. Since we’ve been back, she’s been blowing him off.
Due to my complete dedication to Hunter, I haven’t had the opportunity to have a thorough conversation with her, leaving me clueless about the details.
“I’ve got a call to be on in a few minutes with the sales team.” Jonah’s gaze slides between Jami and me. “You two can use the conference room to finish the tasks we discussed.”
“That will work.” I peek over at Jami.
His jaw is tight as he stares at me from across the table. Jonah gathers his stuff and leaves the room.
I pick up my laptop. “I’ll move over there so we can get this done today. You must be drowning in work.”
Jami keeps his eyes on me. “My team is busy, but I’m fine. I had a good two weeks of uninterrupted time to get everything done. At this point, I’m just making sure the bugs are taken care of.”
My insides tighten. I set my things down next to his, but he closes his computer and stands.
“Let’s go to lunch.” He gathers his belongings and starts to leave the room. “I’m hungry and we can do this there.”
“Jami, is lunch necessary?”
He stops at the door and glances back at me. “Yes. I’m hungry, and I’m not doing this here.”
His commanding tone tells me I won’t win this debate. I relent and agree to meet him in the lobby after I get my jacket. He’s scrolling through his phone when I get off the elevator and join him.
I stroll up to him, keeping my tone even. “This was your idea, so you get to pick the restaurant.”
“I’ve already decided.” He flashes me a wicked smile as he slides his phone in his pocket.
My core reverberates with nerves. If I didn’t know better, that expression oozes confrontation, but I don’t know why .
He opens the door that leads outside and ushers me out. “Where’s your henchman?”
“I told Hunter to call him off. You know that type of hovering drives me crazy.”
“And Hunter was okay with that?” Jami glances around our surroundings.
“Yes, but I don’t want to discuss that.” I try to calm my pounding heart and say what I’ve wanted to for the last week. “Do you think we can be friends again? I hate fighting with you.”
“Let’s talk about this once we get to the restaurant.”
He guides me down the street as we briefly discuss work. I’m not paying attention to where he’s taking me until we reach the front door.
He opens it for me. “Ladies first.”
I glance inside and heat rises in my chest.
“You brought me here for sushi?” My mind instantly goes back to the last time we were here together. “What are you up to, Jami?”
“I told you. I’m hungry, and I was in the mood for this. Why? Did you not enjoy it the last time you were here?” His eyes are hidden behind his sunglasses, but his tone tells me everything I need to know.
He’s testing me.
I hold my head high and stride through the door. We get seated in a booth and I wait for him to lead as I remove my coat. He has an agenda, and I’m not going to inadvertently fuel the fire.
Once he’s taken off his jacket, he leans toward me. “Let’s get back to your question about being friends. The answer is yes, we can be friends again, but there’s a caveat.”
“And what’s that?” I move my water glass to the side.
“You need to understand that I have no intentions of staying friends.”
A pang of hurt zaps through me. “What does that mean? ”
“It means I’ve been doing my own work. Hunter came clean with you and seems to be trying to do better for you. You deserve the same thing from me. Lauren and I have come to a peaceful resolution and I can move on from that relationship now and focus on only you.”
“Jami, this is inappropriate.”
“Maybe, but you need to hear me out.” His blue eyes bore into mine. “I’m willing to do the work for you. Tell me what you need so I can fix this rift between us. I love you and will do what it takes to be with you. I’ll risk anything to show you you’re number one in my life. Just tell me what you need.”
I pull back. “Jami, you know I’m with Hunter. What in the hell are you thinking?”
“You say I’ve never fought for you, so I’m going to show you the fight of your life. I want to fix everything between us. My heart and soul yearn for you. I want to do better for you.” His chest rises and falls as his gaze searches my face. “Let me show you how much you mean to me.”
The server comes over and reviews the specials, giving me time to think. I should get up and leave, but I can’t seem to move. She retreats, and Jami and I stare at each other, waiting for the other to speak. When I don’t cave, he gets up and scoots into the seat next to me.
He leans into me to whisper in my ear. “I’ll never stop wanting you. I’ll never stop loving you. You say I’ve never fought for you. Well, this, my sweet temptress, is me fighting for you, so get fucking used to it.”
His warm breath covers my neck before he nips and then kisses it. Heat spreads throughout my body. My nipples tighten, and my world flips on its head.
I push away and back against the wall. “Please don’t do this, Jami.”
He moves closer and cages me in. “When you finally allowed me to explain my situation, you had spent two weeks preparing what you wanted to say. You said you had thought long and hard about it, so I took the last week to figure out what I wanted to say. Now it’s your turn to listen.”
“If I remember right, you had a lot to say that night.”
“I did, but I went about it all wrong. You want open communication, so you’re going to get it. I know I hurt you and I’m sorry. You were right. I should’ve told you what I was going through on our first date. For that, I’ll always be sorry.”
My heart races. “I feel terrible about your loss. Please know that.”
“Of course I do, but that’s not what this is about. I’m done making the same mistakes I have over the last sixteen years. That’s how long we’ve been dancing around our connection. Take a minute to think about that. Let it sink in. That’s how long we’ve loved each other.”
That realization hits me like a lightning strike.
I swallow hard and blink away any feelings for him that are threatening to surface. “Why are you doing this?”
“Because this is what you said you needed from me. To fight for you, to put you first, and to talk to you about how I feel. I love you, Dori. You love me too, whether or not you want to admit it. I don’t want to lose you.”
“Jami…”
“If you gave me two weeks alone with you like you had with him, your relationship with him would be over. We both know it to be true because we share too much history. We share years of love. You’ve known him for less than a year. If you think for one minute that overrides us, you’re lying to yourself.”
The air crackles around us. Everything he’s saying falls over me with unrelenting truth. My blood pulses fast through my veins. I try to back farther away, but I’m already smashed against the wall.
I reach for the only leverage I can think of. “You say this now, but the second Aiden comes into the picture, you’ll cower away. ”
“I’ve already put a call into him. The agency said they’ll get him the message and he’ll call when he can.” Jami shrugs and gives me a look like he’s one step ahead of me.
I sit straighter. “You did, what? Without talking to me? Good God, Jami. What are you trying to do?”
“I’m trying to get you to see we belong together.” He brushes his knuckles along my jaw, keeping my head in place to meet his gaze.
“Jami…”
“It’s always been us and you know it. Don’t worry about Aiden. I’m only planning on telling him how I feel about you—just like we talked about the night everything between us fell apart. I’m going to fight for you and do whatever it takes. You can count on that.”
“Jami, don’t. I’m with Hunter.”
“For now. But how long do you think it will take for you to realize it’s me you really want?”