Chapter 28
CHAPTER 28
DORI
My heart jackhammers. I shouldn’t let this kiss with Jami happen, but I selfishly sink into it. If for no other reason than to say goodbye once and for all.
I’m lying to myself. I’m letting this happen because I still love him, but I need to let him go.
His lips press to mine and I lean in for more. My mind blanks as the moment sweeps me up.
Heat swirls throughout my body and my years of love for him flood my bloodstream. He hugs me tight, then moans a deep rumble from his chest.
The sound brings me back to the room. I press away and suck in a regretful breath.
Only twice in my life have I kissed someone when I was in a relationship with someone else. Both times were with Jami as I betrayed Hunter. I shiver under the weight of guilt, my palms clammy with anticipation of the consequences.
I rush to reach the door. “I shouldn’t have let that happen.”
Jami catches me and takes me into his arms, pressing my back flush against his chest .
He brings his mouth to my ear. “Don’t run from this, Dori. Don’t deny this is what you want.”
I close my eyes and whimper. My body goes slack, my shoulders slumping as a heavy wave of grief crashes over me, stealing my strength. He’s not wrong, but I need him to be.
“Jami, I’ve got to get out of here.”
“Why did you come in here if you didn’t want this to happen? Why else would we need to be in private if it weren’t so you could let your guard down and admit what we have?”
“You’ve got to let me go.”
“Never. You love me like I love you. Until you face that, this will never die. It will fester under the surface and ruin any chance you have at happiness, so quit lying to yourself.”
I twist to address Jami head-on. “I have faced it. Nothing changes the end result. We have so many obstacles and always have.”
“But those can be conquered together.”
“Please stop.”
Jami looks deep into my eyes, his gaze piercing. “How many more years are you willing to stifle our love from growing? Sixteen more than we already have?
“After you’ve married and divorced someone else because, deep down, you were never able to give him your whole heart? Is that what you want? Because that’s what will happen if you leave this room and shove me away.”
I shake my head, trying to ignore the heaviness on my chest. I put on my armor and stand straight.
“That’s not fair, Jami.” I take a step back. “I can’t do this. Let me go. Let me get over you once and for all. I’ve committed myself to Hunter. That won’t change because you and I shared a kiss in a dirty closet.”
Jami flinches and pain flashes across his face. He cocks his head to the side and studies me.
“That’s how you see our love. Dirty. But that’s how you like it. I still have the text you sent me in the restaurant to prove it. The dirtier, the better, as long as no one knows.”
He steps to me and runs the pad of his thumb over my bottom lip, smearing my lipstick across my face. “There. I wiped it clean for you so you can run back to him.”
Damn, that hurt.
I swallow my emotions. “It’s where I belong. The universe has shown me over and over. I’m finally listening to the call.”
Jami can’t hide the sting of my declaration. He shuffles and lifts his hand in surrender.
“Fine, Dori. You win. Go back to Hunter, but don’t come running to me when things go south. I love you and always will, but I won’t stand by and watch you live a life with him when you should be with me.”
The awareness of lost love pulsates through my core, a deep ache that resonates with every beat of my heart. I wrap my arms around my waist to hold it in.
“I don’t belong with you.” The words come out as a whisper.
Jami’s eyes flick with agony, then harden with annoyance. “How can you build something with him when he can’t even take you on a proper date? Oh, stupid me. He can if he flies you to another country, right? How was Paris anyway?”
“Don’t try to hurt me because you’re not getting your way. You had your chance more than once and fucked it up all by your own hand.”
Breaking away from our heated glare, I turn to the door and shove it open. I step out to storm away, only to freeze when Hunter comes into view.
He’s at the other end of the hallway with Jonah. Our eyes lock and Hunter walks toward me, but Jami comes out and places his hands on my shoulders. Hunter’s step falters. His eyes sweep over me and Jami.
Jonah says something to Hunter, then takes him by his arm and spins him away. Hunter glances back at me over his shoulder, shakes his head, and stalks away.
I brush Jami’s hands off me and hurry after Hunter. Jonah steps in front of me as Hunter trudges through the front doors, raking his hand through his hair.
“Dori, give him some space. Now is not the time to talk. Trust me. It won’t go as you hope.”
“Jonah, it wasn’t what it looked like. Let me go and explain.”
“What it looked like was you and Jamison coming out of a room together where you went to escape a crowd. The guilt, the lipstick smeared across your face, and Jamison’s smug smile said the rest. I don’t think the explanation is needed, so give Hunter some space. He’ll call you when he’s ready to talk.”
I dwindle into myself. Hunter doesn’t deserve me hurting him like this.
I’m such a shit and need my best friend. “Where’s Melanie?”
Jonah scowls. “How the fuck would I know? Like you, she enjoys tearing apart someone who cares about her. Try the nearest club. I’m sure she’s looking for the next guy she can destroy.”
He marches back into the launch party. I glance back to find Jami standing near the storage closet with his arms folded over his chest. He raises his eyebrows and shrugs as if he couldn’t care less that Hunter witnessed us coming out together.
I run to grab my phone, texting Mel as soon as I have it.
Me: Hey, Mel. I’m checking in on you. How did it go with Jonah?
Melanie: Not good. I’ll tell you about it over our workout.
Me: Sounds like we could both use some girl time.
Melanie: Meet me at the gym when you’re done at the launch party.
Me: I’ll text you when I leave.
Once I find a reason to exit the event, I schedule a ride service to pick me up and text Hunter.
Me: I know seeing Jami and I come out of the closet together looked terrible, but it wasn’t what you think. Can we meet and talk about it?
Hunter: A closet? I assumed it was another room. Why would you go into a closet with him if it was nothing? Your logic isn’t making sense.
Fuck!
Me: Let me explain in person.
Hunter: One question. Did anything happen that would bother me?
I shrink into myself, pulling my body inward as if trying to disappear into the shadows.
Me: I’d rather talk to you about this in person.
Hunter: Answer the question.
Me: Why can’t we discuss this in person?
Hunter: If something happened, I’d like to know so I can have some time to think about it and calm down. I’m not in a good space and don’t want it to come out on you. Respect that.
As guilt sets in, my stomach clenches with unease.
Me: Okay, but I told him I’m committed to you. That hasn’t changed.
Hunter: You’re avoiding the question. You can tell me or I can make my own assumptions.
Me: He kissed me. I’m sorry. Please don’t be mad. I told him I’m with you and that’s what I want.
With that, Hunter goes radio silent. Anxiety rushes through my blood because, deep down, Hunter has to know I allowed Jamison to kiss me. Trying to deny that will only seem more deceptive. I need Melanie, and from what Jonah said, I think she needs me just as much.
Melanie steps off her elliptical as I wipe down my machine.
“We’ve fallen a few notches in a couple of weeks—from flying in a mansion in the sky to this.” She points to the weights. “Are you still up for lifting, or should we call it good and go out somewhere fun?”
“Let’s finish a great workout and decide what to do tonight. I still have a ton of nervous energy.” I make my way over to the dumbbells. “What happened with you and Jonah? ”
“Nothing. Why?” She picks up some weights and starts doing lunges.
I don’t want to do legs tonight, but I might as well get the workout over with. Hunter canceled our plans for later tonight, so I have the time.
I grab a pair of fifteen-pound weights and join Melanie. “The last time I saw you together, he was about to let you have a piece of his mind. Something was going on. Tell me about it.”
“He told me I was inconsiderate, so I left. What’s more to talk about?”
“Why did he say you’re inconsiderate?”
“Because I’m not going to drop everything to be at his beck and call.”
“I get that, but Mel, you loved your time with him. Since we got back from Paris, you haven’t spent any time with him. At least not that I know of.”
“It’s better this way.” She puts down her dumbbells.
“Why?” I finish my last rep and rest.
She takes a drink of water and then goes back to doing lunges. She’s unusually avoidant, so something must be bothering her.
“Spill it, Mel. What’s going on?”
She glances my way and counts her reps out loud. I raise my eyebrows and wait for her to answer.
With a roll of her eyes, she puts down her weights. “Okay, but I don’t want you to freak out on me.”
“I won’t. You’ve been a great friend to me, so let me be here for you.”
She studies me for a second and then nods. “I really like Jonah. He’s everything I want in a man, but it’s best to end things before I get too involved and let my feelings for him take over.”
“Why? If you like him and he wants to keep dating, what’s the problem? ”
She bites the corner of her lip. “Don’t be mad, but I got a job offer. It’s a good offer and I think I’m going to take it.”
“What? Where?”
If she’s hidden this from me, I won’t like the answer.
“In Miami.”
The blood drains from my veins. I want to be happy for her, but I do not want her to leave.
“Why Miami? Why can’t you stay here and find something? Shit, Mel. I’ll give you a promotion, but?—”
“Dori, I need a change. I love you and Efron Worldwide, but there’s nowhere for me to go within our company. I know because I’ve been watching for the last year.”
I shake my head. “Then I’ll create a job for you and you can help me design it. Just tell me what you want. I’m sure Jonah would even help us. He recently told me he thought you were ready for more responsibilities.”
Her shoulders go slack. “I don’t want to move up in the company because my best friend made it happen. And don’t even get me started on getting Jonah involved. I will not be seen as someone who made it because she’s fucking her boss.”
Ouch!
I blow out a gust of air. “Is that how you see me?”
“No. You had your job before you started things with Hunter.” She turns away. “It’s different now and I want a change.”
My brain spins out of control.
She cannot leave me here alone.
“Tell me about this job. Who’s the opportunity with?”
She bends over and grabs her phone and water bottle. “I’m done working out. If you want to go out later, let me know.”
“Melanie, tell me about your offer.” I step in front of her so she can’t leave.
She sighs. “It’s with Mateo’s company, and it’s a great opportunity. I’d be managing the marketing for their social media teams for all the US-based clubs and restaurants. The money is insane and I don’t see any reason not to accept it.”
My chest heaves. “You’re going to go work for The Beckett Brand? God, Mel. Why? Efron Worldwide is just as successful.”
“I know, but this opportunity is better. At least for what I want to do.”
Jami’s move to Miami to work for Mateo swings into the forefront of my mind. My panic gets the best of me and my eyes narrow in on her.
“How did you find out about this job?” There’s no mistake in my accusatory tone.
She growls and steps around me. “I’m not doing this here.”
I spin toward her. “Based on your response, I think I already know. So tell me, did you and Jami plan this? Are you guys moving there together, then slowly, as I get used to you both being gone, you’ll start dating?”
She glares at me. “You know I wouldn’t do that to you. I can’t believe you even went there.”
“Believe it because I find it really coincidental that he has this great opportunity to move back to Miami and work with Mateo again, and then suddenly, you have an offer coming from them. Looks mighty suspicious to me.”
“I can’t believe you.” She stomps away.
Pain, panic, confusion, and desperation swirl like a hurricane through my entire body. I’m out of my mind with so many emotions that I can’t think straight. My thoughts spin.
I chase after her. “Tell me the truth. You and Jami have been going behind my back, haven’t you? How else would you have found out about the job?”
She twists back to me and gets right in my face. “Alright, Dori. We’ll do this your way. Jami told me about it a couple of months ago. So yes, Jami was involved. He was one of my references.”
“Why not ask me?”
“It happened during the time you were playing master to your two puppets, so your mind was elsewhere. And as far as thinking I’d take the job so Jami and I can hook up, I should say yes just to piss you off because you don’t deserve him.”
She pokes me in the center of my chest. “And to make it clear, you don’t deserve Hunter, either. Do them both a favor and let them go because your sick game of toying with them is getting really fucking old.”
I freeze, the slice of her words cutting me to my core. My heart bleeds out. She’s never been like this with me.
I should stop, but I come back swinging. “It’s funny how you say this now when it fits your narrative. Just a while back, you were telling me you supported me being with Hunter, but that was because it worked for you. After all, you got a trip to Paris from it.”
“Supporting your decision is one thing, Dori. Believing you deserve either of them is another.”
And that right there, takes me out. I have no rebuttal because, deep down, I haven’t earned either man’s love.
Melanie storms away, leaving me alone in the wake of my own destruction. I can’t say that I blame her.
Because of my selfishness, I single-handedly blew up three of my relationships in one afternoon and I have no idea how to fix any of them.