Chapter 13
JAMIE
“How many times are you going to make me promise this?”
Carmen side-eyes me with an assessing scan. “Probably every couple minutes until you drop me off at home and I lock the door behind me.”
Despite her words, there’s a splash of amusement in her eyes, and just the tiniest whisp of a smile at the edge of her lips.
“I promise I’m not a serial killer and this isn’t a plot to get you alone,” I say, grinning at the absurdity of the words.
Carmen hums skeptically. “If you say so …”
My grin pitches higher. I’m in my car with Carmen sitting next to me in the passenger seat. My nerves are tap-dancing with excitement. I’m giddy, feeling wired and alive in a way I never really have.
Sure, I felt insanely hyped-up during the Frozen Four championship last year. And especially after we won. It was a high unlike any other. But this? This is … different.
My fingers thrum with tension while they’re wrapped around my steering wheel.
As good as it feels to be alone with Carmen like this, there’s a nervous bite to it.
But it’s not a bad feeling. It heightens everything around me.
It makes the orange glow of the streetlights we’re driving under brighter and warmer; it makes the purr of my engine louder; it makes the scent that wafts from Carmen’s hair strike my nose with a sharper and sweeter note.
“Here it is,” I say, pulling onto the wide shoulder at the summit of one of the hills that the roads out of Cedar Shade run through.
I take a deep breath when I step outside the car. The weather is milder than it’s been for the last couple weeks. Still cold, but there’s no wind, and instead of being frigid and brutal, the frosty air is clean, fresh, invigorating in my lungs.
Carmen gets out and casts an eye at our surroundings. “Hmm. This does seem like a great place to hide a body …”
I laugh. “It would actually be a terrible place, wouldn’t it? It’s the highest nearby elevation. This wide shoulder probably makes it a popular place for drivers to pull over.”
“Wow. You’ve given this some thought, huh?”
I laugh again, rolling my eyes. “Maybe I should be concerned with how easily you agreed to go on a nighttime drive with me if you were worried that I’m a murderer.”
Her smile rises higher than I’ve ever seen it. It’s so fucking pretty that my heart feels pierced by an arrow. “Maybe self-preservation isn’t my strong suit.”
I shake my head. “I doubt that.” I open the back door and pull out the blanket I brought. I walk to the front of my car and spread it over the hood.
“Ohh, I see,” Carmen says, an archness in her voice, “this isn’t a murder thing. This is a kinky outdoor sex thing.”
My face flushes. I stammer just trying to get the first word of denial out of my mouth.
Carmen laughs, the sound wrapping around my heart like a soft thread. “Sorry, I shouldn’t joke like that. I know you’re too innocent to handle it.”
She doesn’t know the half of it.
A twinge of anxiety notches somewhere in my chest. Would it matter to Carmen that I’m a virgin?
It’s easy to sweep the thought aside. We’re a million steps away from that being a concern.
She’s only just started to humor my attempts to get to know her.
My level of sexual experience is as far from being relevant to our current relationship as the moon above us is from the gravel under our feet.
“We’re going to test out a new possible hobby,” I say.
Carmen lifts an eyebrow, looking around us. “Okay. I’m already out of guesses.”
I sweep my hand toward the sky. “Astronomy.”
She cranes her head, and I see her lips part in wonder. “Wow. I didn’t know you could see this many stars outside town.”
“Yeah, it’s incredible, isn’t it? One of my old teammates told me about it, but I haven’t been out here at night until now.”
Spots of light blanket the clear, black sky above us, stars scattered overhead, some bright, some dull, some clustered, some lone in a stretch of darkness.
I hop onto the hood and feel the suspension springs sink under my weight. I pat the spot next to me. Carmen joins me. I feel the movement from her weight on my backside, and it makes my groin swell.
“Do you know how to spot any constellations?” I ask, scanning the sky.
“No clue,” she answers.
“I downloaded this stargazing app, but I feel like we should give it a try on our own first.”
“Of course. Using an app would be cheating,” she replies, hints of both sarcasm and amusement in her voice.
Quietly, our eyes wash over the sky. A feeling that’s paradoxically both thrilling and peaceful nestles in my chest. I can’t find any patterns in the sprawl of silvery lights, but I could sit here next to Carmen until the sun comes up.
The hoot of an owl carries over the still air.
“Should we try to spot the Big Dipper first?” Carmen asks.
“I guess so. Though I have no idea how people found patterns in the stars in the first place. It all looks totally random to me.”
“Guess back in the day, people had nothing to do at night other than look up at the sky.”
“Can’t relate,” I snark. Carmen snorts a tiny laugh.
“Were you really up when I texted you?” She asks, our necks still arched to look above us.
“Yeah, totally.”
Carmen’s throat rumbles with a skeptical sound.
“What?” I ask. “Would I lie about something like that?”
“To make me feel better? Probably.”
“No way. I’m brutally honest and can never tell a little white lie. Once, I went clothes shopping with Sebastian, and he asked me if a pair of jeans made his butt look too big. I had to be honest and say yes. He cried for a week.”
Carmen laughs next to me. Not just a huff or a chuckle, but a real laugh. It’s a high, tinkling sound, and a swirl of joy pulses in my chest. I feel like I could float off this blanket and up to the stars we’re gazing at.
“What, you don’t believe me?”
“No comment.”
Another owl hoot travels across the still night as we continue to search for any pattern.
“How the hell are you supposed to find the outline of a ladle in all this?” Carmen asks.
I open the stargazing app. “There’s an option to take a picture of the sky and have the app outline the constellations for you.”
Carmen blows a raspberry. “Now that’s really cheating.”
“And you’re above cheating, I assume.”
“You assume wrong. Give me that.”
She grabs the phone from me. Our fingers brush. Sparks from the warmth of her touch erupt on my hand, dancing over it like drops of water sizzling on a skillet.
Carmen opens the feature on the app to take a photo. In a second, red lines are connecting stars to spell out the constellations for us.
She tilts her head, looking up and trying to match the stars in the sky with the shapes traced in the image.
“Is that it?” she asks.
I lift my right arm, the one closest to her. “Right there, I think, is the beginning of the handle.”
She lifts her left arm. It brushes against mine. My heart leaps.
“Oh, I see!” She sounds excited. It’s a tone I’ve never heard in her voice until now. Immediately, I know how much I’d do to hear more of it. It’s borderline alarming.
“And there’s the bowl.” I move my arm to trace the outline. My hand touches hers. She doesn’t pull away from the touch, letting my contact with her move her arm to trace the shape.
“Wow. Recognizing it actually feels like an accomplishment.”
“Gonna add a couple Astrology classes to your schedule when you go back to school?”
“Not likely,” she huffs. But then she adds, “This is fun, though.”
“Really?” I ask. I cringe internally, knowing how eager I sounded.
“Really. I’m just like you,” she nudges me with her shoulder, “can’t tell a little white lie.”
My stomach tilts at the intimate contact. Even when I try to wipe the smile off my face, it’s impossible.
“Hey, aren’t zodiac signs based on constellations? What sign are we in right now?”
“Capricorn, I think?” Carmen ponders.
I check the app. “Yeah. I think it’s …” I get up on my knees, turning to face south. “There!”
Carmen squirms to face where I’m pointing. Her hip brushes against mine. Another rush of sparks.
She hums. “I see it. I have no idea how anyone would look at the sky and imagine that outline in the first place, though.”
I chuckle. “For real.”
We settle back in a more comfortable seating position.
“What’s your sign?” I ask.
Carmen snorts. “It sounds like you’re hitting on me at a bar in the 80s.”
“If only. I’m a Gemini. My birthday’s May 30th.”
“You’re twenty-one, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, I’m May 25th.” She nudges me again. I could really get used to that. “Five days before you.”
An older woman. My cock twitches.
Our conversation drifts from topic to topic as we sit on the hood of my car, and before I ever think to check the time, pale light starts to spread across the horizon.