Chapter 23
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Ashley
I didn't quite shout myself hoarse but I wore half moon impressions into my palms from my nails. I'd spent a lot of the last quarter of the game with my hands clenched into fists, on the edge of my seat.
"That was a nail biter," Bec said, eyes wide. "I've seen a lot of intense games, but that was right up there."
I nodded. "No wonder people are so obsessed with football."
The side of her mouth twitched. "Just football, or the players?"
I sat back in my seat and idly watched fans pour out of the stadium. We could leave the box easily enough, but traffic would clog the area for the next hour or so. For that reason, I'd wait for a while.
Not because I hoped to catch a glimpse of Chase.
No way.
Okay, a little bit.
I shifted in my seat. "Both, I guess. I know it's ridiculous. Chase made it clear he's not interested in me. Why would he be?"
If Brandi was his type, I certainly wasn't. She was flashy, blonde and busty. I was none of those things. I was…friend material, that was all. Fuck buddy at best.
"After what happened with that other girl, I think he's a bit gun shy," Bec agreed. "But you two are so good together. You're sweet and smart, and you'd never go behind his back like she did."
"That's for sure," I agreed. If Kris taught me anything, it was the need to be upfront with the other person. If he'd told me he was interested in someone else, I'd have let him go, there and then. If he said he was dissatisfied I could have at least tried to give him what he needed.
Relationships needed honesty. Anything else was a disservice to both people involved.
"I know she hurt him badly," I said. "As much as Kris hurt me. More so, because she spoke to that journalist."
Bec grimaced. "He is horrible. I don't miss working with people like him. He gives the rest of us journalists a bad name."
"It doesn't help when people willingly give him all the dirt," I said ruefully.
"I heard she's up to a million followers," Bec said. "And got an endorsement from a big cosmetic brand."
I wrinkled my nose in disgust. "That really doesn't seem right," I said.
"I wish her all the happiness and success she can get, but not at the expense of someone else.
From what Chase said, she's smart. She's certainly pretty enough.
That should be enough to get her where she wants to be, without stepping on someone else. "
I guessed, to her, Chase and guys like him were a shortcut to fame and fortune. Whatever helped people to sleep at night.
"Right." Bec agreed. She reached for the plate of cookies and offered me one.
"No thanks." I shook my head. I glanced around and found us alone. All the other wives, girlfriends and guests of the team had filed out already.
"They've probably gone to watch the press conference," Bec said. She grimaced again. "Hawk will be a while. He always is. He likes to give the press all the time he can. In return, they more or less leave us alone. That's the theory anyway."
"Does it work?" I asked.
"For the most part," she said. "Nothing would deter Harvey Danbury if he sensed something messy he could blow out of proportion." She made a face like she ate something nasty.
"He sounds like he's in need of a life," I said dryly.
Bec snorted. "He really is. I can't imagine someone who does what he does goes home at night, happy with what he's done all day. He's got rich doing it though."
"That's enough for some people," I said, thinking of Brandi again. "Money might keep them warm at night, but it can't cuddle."
Bec smiled. "Or give you orgasms."
"No, but it can buy you things which give you orgasms," I pointed out. "A whole drawer full."
She chuckled. "It's not as much fun as having someone else to help you with that."
I sighed. "That's true." Chase was very, very good at doing that. So good I dreamed about him the night before, and woke up in a lather of sweat. I blushed just thinking about it.
"Will you be at Waves tonight?" Bec asked. "After a game like that, they'll want to celebrate for a while. Although, they'll spend half the night complaining about aches and bruises too. It comes with the territory."
"Does that bother you?" I asked. "That Hawk might get badly hurt someday?"
"Of course." Bec sat back, half eaten cookie in her hand. "Every time he goes out there, I worry he'll get smashed to bits. Sometimes I think they only love to play so they can smash the other guys, because they can't do that otherwise."
"Channelling their inner thug?" I suggested.
Bec snorted a laugh. "Exactly. He gets hurt, but it's never too bad. And it's better he smash guys on the field than off."
"Right," I agreed. "Work out that aggression on the opposition."
"Exactly." Bec nodded and bit into her cookie. "We just take ours out on a bowl of cookie dough, or a treadmill."
"Much safer." I knew plenty of women played football, wrestled or whatever, but it didn't appeal to me as much as cookie dough.
"So, you didn't tell me what you did with the balloons," Bec said.
"Oh." I remembered now I started to tell her about them during the break between the first and second quarters. "I have a friend who's a nurse and drives a van. We put them all in the back and he took them to the kids’ ward at the hospital. From what he said, the kids loved them."
Playing with the things might help to distract them from their illnesses or injuries, if only for a little while.
"What a great idea," Bec enthused. "I'd have grabbed a needle and stabbed them all. Your way is much better."
I shuddered at the idea of all that popping. "That would be a good way to burn off aggression too. If a shit load messier."
"Lucky they weren't condoms," Bec said. "I don't think the children's hospital could take them if they were."
I groaned at the idea. "Even Kris wouldn't be that stupid.
" Honestly I'm surprised he didn't think of it.
He would have found it hilarious, if not romantic.
It would be a lot more expensive though.
He wouldn't have spent a ton on a gesture like that, no matter how badly he wanted me back. Thank goodness for some small mercies.
"I don't think Chase would go that far either," Bec said. "Bam might though. That guy would do anything for a laugh. Almost anything. He wouldn't throw a game, or jeopardise one."
"None of the guys would be on the team if they didn't take their jobs seriously." I hesitated for a moment, then asked, "Do you ever feel like you come second to football?"
"Sometimes." Bec shrugged. "It's just a part of being in a relationship with a pro athlete. Or—well, anyone. There's times I've been up all night writing and I only realise when Hawk brings me toast and coffee for breakfast. Jobs get intense, y' know?"
"Yeah, I guess so." I travelled all over for mine. Was that really any different?
"We're lucky in a way," Bec said. "Hawk's earnings means when he's done with football, he can retire if he wants to. He won't, he'll coach, because he loves the game so much. But he can be around more for our future kids and me."
It sounded like she and Hawk had their future mapped out, and it sounded wonderful. I didn't even know what might happen in the next minute, much less twenty years from now.
"You have it all figured out," I said, unable to keep the envy from my tone.
Bec laughed. "Not really, we just know we want to spend our lives together. Whatever happens along the way, we'll roll with it. Things won't always be easy, but we'll work on it because we want it."
She seemed genuinely happy.
I was glad for her. She deserved it. The other wives and girlfriends were nice enough, but Bec treated me like I was an old friend.
As far as I could tell, she acted that way around everyone. I could imagine her as the team matriarch if Hawk became a coach for the Humpbacks some day. She'd take people under her wing left and right. Her and a gaggle of kids, no doubt. All just as football mad as each other.
As futures went, it sounded sweet.
"Hawk seems pretty great," I said.
Bec smiled softly. "He really is. Once he grew out of his teenage asshole years." She made a face. "He was a dick in high school, but that's a whole other story. I'll tell you someday."
"I look forward to hearing it," I said. If I ever came here again. Without an invitation, I wouldn't be allowed into the private box. Without Chase, I had no reason to come. I might be converted to football, but I could watch from home, hidden under a pile of blankets on the couch. With wine.
By now, the crowd thinned considerably. Only clusters here and there remained, but they were making their way toward the doors and out.
"This place looks even bigger when it's empty," I said. I wondered how it felt to be out on the field, people all around you, shouting your name. I imagined it would be heady. Intimidating, but addictive. It must be terrifying the first time, until focus and adrenaline kicked in.
"It really does," Bec agreed. "I try not to think too much about what it cost to build and how long it took. It's brought a lot more money into the economy, of course, but it would still be eye watering."
I nodded. "People don't always think it's the best way to spend millions."
"Right." Bec looked rueful. "I'd agree, but I wrote an article once on the return to the community. The team gives back a lot."
"It's more than just entertainment," I said with half a shrug.
"Absolutely," Bec said. She glanced at her watch. "I should head down now. If I'm not seen somewhere near the press conference, people will assume Hawk and I had a fight or something." She rolled her eyes.
"Right. I should head home." I dreaded dealing with the press of people, but with any luck the worst of it was over by now. "Thank you."
Bec looked surprised. "For what?"
"For making me feel welcome," I said. "And making the game even more fun."
"I hope I didn't shout too loud in your ears," she said with a laugh.
I grinned. "Not too much. The ringing has almost stopped."
She chuckled. "Sorry about that. I get excited, especially when the game is this close and this important."
"It was exciting," I agreed. I probably cheered too loud too, but the whole box had. "Next stop, Down Under Bowl."
"All the games in between first," she said. "But with any luck, they'll make it this year." She stood and made her way toward the door. "Keep your fingers crossed."
I crossed the fingers on my right hand and held them up.
She did the same and we both laughed.
I felt like I'd known her for years. I gave her a quick hug. I didn't have many really good friends. I'd like it if Bec could be that some day. If she had the time for another friend.
"I'll see you at the next home game?" she asked.
"I don't know," I said. "It depends."
She fixed me with a firm look. "You should talk to him. If you keep your feelings to yourself, you'll never know what might have been."
"I know," I said. It might save a lot of hurt though, for me and for Chase. Were either of us ready for that with each other, or anyone else? "I'll think about it," I assured her.
"Good." She reached for my hand and gave it a squeeze. "Sometimes you have to close your eyes and jump."
I nodded and followed her out of the box. If I jumped, where would I land? I had no idea, and that scared me most of all.