30. Kiley
CHAPTER THIRTY
KILEY
Patrick was able to change his flight, so I gave him the address to one of the children’s parks closest to his hotel, which conveniently isn’t far from Jax’s condo. I bundle up Zander because it’s still a little chilly outside, and we head out after a quick breakfast.
Jax was in a mood this morning. He offered one more time to miss practice and accompany me to meet Patrick, but I refused.
I know he doesn’t like that I’m meeting Patrick without anyone else, but that’s my decision to make.
There’s no reason for Jax to be there, especially since he isn’t my boyfriend.
I load Zander in the car, and we make our way to the park.
I haven’t said anything to Zander about who we’re going to meet, so I take the opportunity to prepare him.
“Hey buddy, so this morning we’re going to meet a friend of mine that you haven’t met before.
” I glance at him in my rearview mirror and he’s holding on to his black birdie, looking out the window.
“Are we meeting him at the park?” Zander asks.
“Yes, he’s meeting us at the park. His name is Patrick and I think you’re really going to like him.”
“Okay.”
Patrick and I didn’t necessarily discuss how we’re going to tell Zander that he’s his dad. I don’t think there’s really any “proper” way of going about it. I’ve told Zander in the past that his dad lives in Boston, so I decide to see if he’ll put two and two together.
“Patrick doesn’t live here in Chicago. He lives in Boston.”
I briefly look in the mirror at him, and his facial expression remains the same. Guess he doesn’t remember.
But a minute later, he breaks the silence and asks, “Does Patrick know my daddy?”
His timing is perfect because I’m turning into our destination. I park the car, unbuckle my seat belt and turn my body to talk to him. “Yes, he knows your daddy because he is your daddy.”
His eyes get wide. “I’m meeting my daddy today?” he whispers in disbelief.
I nod. “How do you feel about that?” I know my question might be stupid because he’s only five years old, but his feelings are important, and if he’s scared and doesn’t want to meet Patrick, then I’m calling it off. “Do you want to meet him? Because it’s okay if you don’t.”
He looks out the window and points. “Is that him holding a dinosaur?”
I follow his line of vision to see Patrick waiting for us, holding a huge stuffed dinosaur. Smart, Patrick. “Yup, that’s him.”
“I want to meet him.” Zander starts fumbling for the belt buckle to his booster seat, and I chuckle at his excitement.
I get out of the car and, while walking to Zander’s side, I shoot Patrick a text letting him know I told Zander who he is and good job with the dinosaur.
I open the car door, help Zander down and hold on to his hand.
“Remember the rules of the park, right? No talking to strangers, and you play where I can see you at all times.”
“Is Patrick allowed to play with me?”
“If he wants,” I advise him as we walk toward Patrick. “He might want to ask you a lot of questions to try to get to know you better.”
Patrick plasters a smile on his face, but I can tell by his body language that he’s nervous. Can’t blame him, I would be too if the roles were reversed.
“Hi Patrick,” I greet as we get closer. “Thanks for meeting us this morning. This is Zander.” I give Zander an encouraging smile.
Patrick gets down on his haunches so he’s eye level with Zander. “Hey, Zander. I’m Patrick.” He holds out his hand, and Zander shakes it. “It’s nice to meet you.”
“Are you my daddy?” Zander blurts out. I smirk and shake my head at my kid’s bluntness.
Patrick looks at me, and I nod. “Yes, I am.” He shifts uncomfortably on his feet and looks at the dinosaur he’s carrying. “I got this for you. Hope you like dinosaurs.” He hands the stuffed animal over to Zander.
“What do you say, Zander?” I ask him when all he does is stare at it.
“Thank you,” he responds, and then hands me the dinosaur to hold. He asks Patrick, “Do you want to go on the swings with me?”
Patrick smiles. “Sure.”
Zander grabs Patrick’s hand and practically pulls him over to the swings. Patrick glances over his shoulder at me, and his face is beaming with happiness. I smile and follow the boys, the tension in my body slowly fading as I have a hunch this is going to be a great morning.
For two hours, I listen to the boys ask each other questions while they play.
Patrick keeps up with Zander’s energy and is hands-on with him on the playground.
I stand by them at each station they go to so that they both feel comfortable knowing I’m close by.
Zander learns he has an uncle and a couple of cousins around his age back in Boston.
Patrick learns all about Zander’s favorite foods, his favorite television shows and movies.
“Do you like hockey?” Zander asks as they go up and down the seesaw together.
“I love hockey,” Patrick responds. “I go to a lot of games in Boston.”
“We go to every Phoenixes game.”
“Every game?” Patrick laughs, thinking Zander is exaggerating. “Even during the school week?”
“Well, no, but Jax wants us to.”
“Who’s Jax?” Patrick asks, looking at me.
I’m about to respond, but Zander answers for me. “Jax Morrow, number twenty-three. He’s a left winger and sometimes he bangs guys against the glass. That’s my favorite part. That and when he scores goals.”
“You know Jax Morrow?” Patrick questions with skepticism. “He’s a big-time hockey player.”
“Yeah,” Zander nods. “We live with him.”
Patrick looks at me in confusion, and I clear my throat, trying to figure out how to answer this. “Jax is a family friend, and I’m currently his temporary nanny while his daughter is in town. We don’t live with him full-time.”
“Wow, that’s pretty cool,” Patrick answers, but seems distracted. “Isn’t he married?”
“No, divorced.”
“Maybe you can come to the game with us tonight?” Zander offers, and my heart wants to burst with pride at how sweet my little man is.
Patrick’s face falls in disappointment. “I wish I could, Zander.” He looks at his watch and frowns.
“Unfortunately, I have to go back to Boston. In fact, I probably should be leaving for the airport soon.” Patrick holds onto the handlebars of the seesaw while he gets off and gently lowers it to the ground for Zander to get off.
“But I don’t want to stop playing.” Zander crosses his little arms over his chest and pouts, refusing to get off the seesaw.
“I don’t want to stop either, but I have to.” Patrick walks over to me and whispers. “I don’t want to leave.” He racks his hand through his hair in frustration. “When will I see you guys again?”
“We can start Facetiming after work so you can talk to him.”
Patrick takes out his phone and looks at his calendar. “What about next weekend? I can fly back.”
I do the same and shake my head. “We can’t, we’ll have Jax’s daughter. Oh wait!” I hesitate a little, not knowing if this is a good idea or not, but I decide to go with my gut. “We’ll be on spring break soon. Zander and I can come to Boston for a couple of days?”
Patrick’s face lights up. “Really? I’ll buy your plane tickets and you guys can stay with me. I have a guest room.”
I bite my lip, not quite comfortable with that idea. “I think it’s best if we stay in a hotel, if that’s okay?”
“Of course. Whatever you’re comfortable with. I’ll take care of everything for you. Just send me the dates and I’ll get everything booked.”
“Patrick, you don’t have to do that. I can pay for our airfare and hotel myself.”
“I know you can, but I want to.” He swallows and looks down. “Just to let you know, I’ve been advised to get a lawyer.”
I nod, figuring as much. “I’ll be getting one as well, but let me be crystal clear about something,” I lower my voice and stare intensely into his eyes when he returns his gaze to mine.
“I want you to have a relationship with Zander, but if you try to take him away from me, I will fight you tooth and nail.”
He holds up his hands in defense. “Kiley, that’s not my intention whatsoever. I can tell what an excellent mother you are just in the short amount of time being here with you guys. I just want to be able to see him on a regular basis. My firm has an office here. I might put in for a transfer.”
My eyes widen. “Oh, that’s good to know.” This all feels like it’s moving so fast. I get why he would feel the need to move here, but the idea of having to share my son with someone else is finally hitting me, and I don’t want to think about it right now.
“Zander, honey,” I call over to him. “We need to let Patrick go catch his plane. What do you think about going to Boston to see him in two weeks?”
His whole demeanor changes into excitement. He gets off the seesaw and comes running over to us. “Yes!” He barrels into my legs and wraps his arms around my thighs.
Patrick kneels down and looks into Zander’s eyes. “I had so much fun playing with you this morning, Zander. Is it okay if I call you on the phone tomorrow?”
Zander nods and surprises us both by throwing his arms around Patrick’s neck for a hug. Patrick engulfs him in his arms and closes his eyes, savoring the moment.
Tears spring to my eyes, and I can only pray this goes well and that Patrick sticks to his word.