33. Kiley #2
He takes a step closer to me. “I caught feelings before we even kissed, and they only got deeper the more I was around you, learning what an incredible person you are. I started falling in love with you while watching you take care of the kids and seeing how you even take care of me… hell, you take care of everyone that is lucky enough to be in your world.” He combs a hand through his hair and sighs.
“Bottom line, I was a coward. I was too scared to admit anything to you because I didn’t want to get hurt again if you didn’t feel the same way in return. ”
While I’m secretly relieved to hear his admission, I’m still confused. “But Jax, I admitted I had feelings for you before your road trip. Why didn’t you come clean then?”
He looks down and takes a deep breath. When his gaze meets mine, it’s filled with shame.
“Because I was worried that if we started something serious, and in two years when it is time for me to move, you wouldn’t want to go with me.
You would start resenting me and my job because it would mean you would give up everyone and everything you love in Chicago. I didn’t want to ask that of you.”
“So, you compared me to Gretchen?”
He winces. “Yes.”
I throw my hands up in the air. “But I’m not Gretchen!”
“I know you’re not, and I never should have assumed you would feel the same way she did.”
I shake my head. “No, you shouldn't have. So why are you here?”
“I saw Jenna, Cal and Avery last night at the game.” My eyes go wide in surprise since I know he wasn’t expecting to see them in Kelowna, only in Chicago.
“I forgave her, and it made me feel lighter… happier. She told me I deserved to be with someone who loves me as much as I love them, and I realized that person was you. I’ve never felt this happy or this loved by any other person. Not Gretchen, and certainly not Jenna.”
I feel my eyes water, and I look down, not wanting to cry in front of him.
I feel his fingers on my chin as he nudges me to meet his gaze.
“You’re the whole package, Kiley. You’re smart, funny, loyal and fuck, you’re so damn sexy that it’s always hard to keep my hands to myself when I’m around you.
I don’t want to keep my hands to myself.
I want everyone to know that you’re mine. ”
A lone tear drops from my right eye, and he uses the pad of his thumb to wipe it away. “I love you, Kiley. This is me, begging you for a second chance.” He studies me intently. “Please forgive me?”
When I stay silent because I’m too emotional to talk, he takes it the wrong way. “I’m too late, aren’t I?” He drops his hands and takes a step back. “Is it Zander’s dad?”
I shake my head and finally gain my voice.
“No, it’s not Patrick. You’re the only one I want, Jax.
I love you.” I poke my finger in his chest. “But you’ve got to promise me that if I’m committing to this relationship, then there’s no more fear about us or our future.
You have to communicate, and I promise to do the same. ”
“I promise, Kiley.”
“If we’re meant to be, then I’m going to follow you to the ends of the earth, but you have to have faith in us and in me.”
Before I can tell him that I forgive him, he hauls me against his chest and crushes his lips to mine.
Within seconds, my arms are wrapped around his neck, kissing him back with every emotion I have in my soul.
The tears I was trying to hold back are flowing.
He moves his mouth and starts kissing up my tears.
“I’m so sorry, baby,” he tells me between kisses. “It’s been hell these last two weeks knowing I hurt you.” I reclaim his lips and moan when his tongue touches mine. We come up for air after a couple more kisses, and he moves his mouth down my neck. “I’ve missed you so goddamn much, Kiley.”
“Jax, why are you kissing my mommy?”
I try to jump out of Jax’s arms, but he tightens his arms around my waist and gives me one more peck on the lips before answering Zander. “Because I love your mommy and she just agreed to be my girlfriend. Is that okay with you, kiddo?”
Zander runs up to us and wraps his arms around our legs. “Only if it means we get to live with you and not Uncle Keegan. He’s grumpy.”
We both laugh and I start to tell Zander no, but Jax puts his finger against my mouth.
“I would love for you guys to live with me every day. What kind of deal do you think we can make that will get your mommy to agree?” I give Jax a knowing look.
This is probably a conversation we should have another time, but since we practically live with him now, I don’t see it being that big of a transition.
Besides, I would love to spend every night in his arms.
Jax leans down and picks up Zander, then wraps his other arm around me. Zander thinks for a moment. “She likes it when we listen to her. Maybe we can listen to her every day and give her one hundred kisses and hugs too?”
Jax chuckles. “I can totally do that.” He looks down at me. “Do we have a deal?”
I give both of my men a smile. “We only have a deal if Chloe agrees to us living there. I don’t want to take away from her time with you.”
“Chloe knows why I’m here and is hoping you come back as my girlfriend, so I think she’ll be just fine with you two moving in permanently.”
Hearing that Chloe wants me with her dad makes me tear up in happiness. “Then I guess we have a deal.”
Jax swiftly kisses me. “You just made me the happiest man alive.”
“Yay!” Zander yells, and when Jax puts him down, he does his little happy dance.
Jax looks at his watch. “You guys got me for tonight, so what are we doing?”
I pat his chest and give him a sheepish grin. “We’re going to meet Patrick’s whole family for dinner.”
He raises an eyebrow. “As in parents and siblings?”
I nod. “Yup.”
He slowly smiles. “Excellent. I’m really good at winning over parents,” he says with a wink.